Reset Password
Resend Verification Email
7
100
93
304
11,465
11,465 ( 11,465 )
Despite their plan going slightly awry, the Cutie Mark Crusaders' latest venture earns Scootaloo her cutie mark...only, nobody's sure what it means. Does Twilight have the answer?
<
DontWannaKnow
Joined June 2012
297 followers
304
11,465
Comedy
Random
Slice of Life
0
46065
143983
DontWannaKnow
7
100
93
Joined June 2012
297 followers
Groups
-
39w, 4dThe Proofreader Group
-
39w, 4dFanfic Discussion
-
39w, 3dWriting Gold
-
39w, 4dThe Writer's Group
-
39w, 4dOne-Shots
-
39w, 3dComedy Sketches
- Show All Groups
-
39w, 3dEquestria Daily Rejects
-
39w, 4dTrollfics
-
39w, 3dGeneral Stories and Discussion
-
39w, 3dArt for Fanfiction
-
39w, 3dInsanity
-
39w, 4dScootaloo tragedies and happies
-
39w, 3dRookies on the Rise
-
39w, 4dI Hate Equestria Daily
-
39w, 3dScootaloo
-
39w, 3dRandom is Allowed Here
-
39w, 3dRandom Comedy
-
39w, 4dWTF?
-
39w, 4dTwilight's Library
-
39w, 4dTrollin Ponies
-
39w, 3dScootabuse is Best Abuse
-
39w, 3d502 Fiction
-
39w, 3dThe DWK Fan Club
-
38w, 19hScootaloo
304
11,465
More
Less
Comments ( 304 )
Post Comment
Refresh
Um... what just happened here...
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Scootaloo.png
I want that cutie mark. THEN I CAN PLAY WITH FIRE!
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_dealwithit.png
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Rainbow_dealwithit.png
Image: http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/scootaloo.+you+are+not+invisible+to+me+_b5c020_3516966.jpg
Image: http://t.qkme.me/36axm1.jpg
Image: http://www.pacon.com/paper_products/construction/images/FlameRetardantSymbol.jpg
Thermally resistant... It might be useful for Scootaloo to talk to Rainbow Dash about high-speed flight. It is quite possible that Scootaloo's extra thermal resistance might mean she can fly ballistic (extra-atmospheric) hypersonic trajectories. The fastest mail pony in all Equestria? Who knows? 
Of course, it's just as easily her own inherit magic punishing her for all the stupid stunts she's pulled over the years! 
Very, very funny. Somehow it is inevitable that, when those kids get those marks, it's going to be something weird.
Image: http://alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/png/annoyed-facepalm-picard.pngHaha, so how's life in the Liberal Democratic party?
Congratulations, you've managed to write something that perfectly captures everything I think is wrong about popularity. Pandering to the lowest common denominator works depressingly well.
I always try to comment on everything I read, whether to congratulate or advise as the situation demands. In this case, it's the latter. Firstly, this is trying to be a comedy. Humour generally works because the outcome is unexpected. If you can see the punchline of a joke, then it won't have much of an effect when it comes. This story's title is the punchline. You waste 1000 words building up to something that you've already told us. There's no comedic or emotional kick at the end because we've spent the entire story knowing exactly what the state of scootaloo's talent is. It's just 1000 words of boring because of this. The swearing, which is perhaps trying to be another comedic kick, just feels out of place. It's a cheap and hackish method of achieving that unexpected event by doing something that doesn't fit in-universe.
I could go and pick the actual technical writing apart, too--everything from poor characterisation to awkward wording--but honestly, that would be a disservice to you. There's no point fixing the relatively small issues when the main problem--you haven't written something worth reading (and seriously, at 1000 words, or about one minute thirty seconds, that's almost an achievement)--still exists.
Your technical writing is not terrible, however I suggest in future you think a little harder about the actual ideas and themes in your work.
BEST. COMMENT. EVER!
I just lost my sh
t
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Scootaloo_lolface.png
Image: http://s3.amazonaws.com/kym-assets/photos/images/newsfeed/000/187/315/71646%20-%20macro%20meme%20reaction_face%20scootaloo%20screencap.png.jpg?1318992465
It is indeed quite random, deserving of the tag. Mildly amusing, but it's not quite my taste. Others before me have commented it better than I can explain: it's random, a little funny, but not that funny.
On the bright side; it does give Scootaloo something original as a talent. Sure, she's not fireproof, but she can be a great firefighter, and be extra protected if she goes into stunt scooting. Wait...that doesn't go for friction burns...would still help somewhat if she went jumping through flaming hoops, though. Mastering fireworks is an option...if one that should be explored when she's older and smarter.
It did add something... I think that replacing "God" with "Celestia" would make it 20% cooler though. Maybe "Celestia send it to the moon!" but that would be a bit wordy. In any case it needs a period.
Oh, I don't know. It means that her potential is STILL wide open. It is very versatile. Not really a cutie-mark though, really more of a "side talent" like Pinkie's reality warping or the specific magical powers of most unicorns (of course Rarity is the only UNICORN whose horn-talent we know). I guess what I am saying is that it isn't much of a cutie-mark, but it is nothing to sneeze at as a special ability.
Or go for something a bit more setting specific like "What the buck".
You leave her alone! 
My point exactly.
...True.
"" indeed.
-I dunno... Sweetie Belle = Musical Note and Applebloom = Hammer seem pretty likely and predictable. Maybe not those exact marks but something fairly straight-forward in the areas of singing and carpentry. Then again, Applebloom could be anything crafting related, I wouldn't be surprised if she ended up becoming Zecora's apprentice in alchemy for instance. Scootaloo's particular mark is the hardest to predict, since we mostly see them failing at athletics. We know she can scoot and pirouette (although she would prefer a less cutesy term).
-That would actually be a pretty cool effect if it works... too bad a negative result on a test would kill her... maybe if they just sent a single feather as a test?
All in all... fav to reread, but no thumb in either direction, mostly due to it being a supernatural property, rather than a talent area.
Rarity does not approve! Still funny though. ^^
You're thinking about this way too much, it's featured because it's funny and has a catchy title. Also I just flat out disagree with what you said. The ending is hilarious, because it's blunt. Not everything has to be literary genius to be funny. Quite the contrary really.
Blunt? Well, at barely over the minimum length for publishing, yes, it is blunt. That doesn't make it good, though, unless your definition of good is something that's flat out out-of-character and out-of-universe. That's just lazy. Not everything has to be a paragon of literary quality, however merit is not binary. You don't have to choose between being 1984 or a pointless, vapid excuse for human creativity. There is middle ground. There is a LOT of middle ground. Implying that you don't have to even try to write something with any worth is... Honestly depressing to me as both a writer and a consumer. Garbage like this is, at best, good for two minutes of distraction, even if you somehow manage to not see the punchline coming (hint: it's the title), it won't be remembered. Something so ephemeral could be good if the joke were funny, or the idea within was imaginative or new, or the writing was stellar, but no. A great writer could write 1000 words and come up with The Cough--that's writing something short for a reason. This is writing something short because the idea can't power anything more. Please, please don't defend it on the grounds of "Not everything has to have merit", because frankly that's the most fucking depressing thing I've read all day--and I read this today.
As I said at the top of my comment, it's depressing that targeting the lowest common denominator is successful. You may find stories that completely disregard the source material, give away the punchline of the joke, and put the bare minimum effort in enjoyable, but as I said--lowest common denominator.
Anonymous comments currently disabled. Please register to make comments
Cancel
Send