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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Oh my god...this...this chapter.....
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7:45 PM *Writing a super important report of Electronics*
Well let me at lest check for updates on fimfiction *Diaries of a Madman updated* AND READ THE HELL OUT OF IT!!!!
9:30 PM FUUUUUUUUUUUU-
You're a fan of Godwin aren't you?
That was a really good chapter. Nav and Chrysalis, the ultimate team up. Equestria has no chance in hell. And the future holds our hero and a changeling in bed together. Called it. I am guessing that the whole knighthood thing is just a way for Celestia to show everyone that Nav is "loyal" and belongs only to her.
I'm a little surprised Navi defended the changeling queen. Given his history I could've figured that he really didn't care. Maybe he really likes bugs.
Now he is being knighted...and the lease around his neck keeps getting tighter and tighter. Luna and Celestia are working really hard to keep him in Equestria.
I can see Pinkie violently combusting when being asked to go to a huge party. That could probably be used as a weapon.
Damnit man... Why must you always leave me wanting more?
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Nav sees in Chrysalis a kindred spirit and thinks she could help him. If nothing else, it would be very good to have a queen that owes you some favors.
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Don't know what Godwin is, unless you mean Godwin's law.
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Because why else would you keep coming back? I can tell you this: The next chapter was a lot of fun to write.
1288661 Seems like he found a way to deal with his problems, now he must find a way to deal with his hair when he goes bald for winter, the saw-dust cough, constantly getting asked to be a pony again, dealing with royalty problems, being a knight against his will, and trying to figure out how to handle a daughter. This poor bastard has a shitload of crap on his plate. He just got served a shit-sandwhich and he has to take a bite out of it.
1288575 scranton.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw391_130660655896.jpg
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Yeah Godwin's Law, been seeing that quite a bit everywhere I go lately.
You really make Pinkie Pie hilarious sometimes especially the part were she says "soon, you" reminds me of this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bk5GPo9j7cQ
well mr/mrs author I have to thank you for saving/integrating chrysalis into the story and doing her justice in the story for this you get all the spikestaches but since they dont all fit in one comment you'll have to use you'r imagination.
he's reminding me a lot of Rand when he was going through his "phases" (if you dont know who Rand is read wheel of time series if you want to know).
Oh wow... Nav the accidental pedophile.
Anyways, what are the odds of a "flutterfuck" as it were? Fluttershy wants to be a tree and Nav is part tree. They would get on well, and Nav is pretty experienced with handling wood...
I would assume assertive rape, but I don't know...
Anyways, this story, I like it...
More.
I would have payed to see that.
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'ruin Nav's Life' Havent we been in that phase for almost the entire story?
Twenty throwing knives. Two, six, and ten is eighteen. What about the other two?
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Trans-dimensional storage space, the same place ponies store things.
Fixed.
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I am reading two two things currently. One Is this, and two is the House of Leaves. Mind blown
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Yeah... If I was him I'd probably already have rope and only need to find a strong ceiling fixture...
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It's Draconequis not Draconaquis. One might say I'm a grammar Griffon
Why is it the 512th time the party happened! U know the party in the chapter before... Has it any relations to the epic 512th stormtrooper elite devision in star wars?
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I pulled a random number out of my ass.
3419652 Indeed
And I got a very disturbing image with dildo's that got numbers on 'em.
You know, in the sake of fun...
“For some reason, you will no longer be the person you believed you once were. You'll detect slow and subtle shifts going on all around you, more importantly shifts in you. Worse, you'll realize it's always been shifting, like a shimmer of sorts, a vast shimmer, only dark like a room. But you won't understand why or how.” - House of Leaves
Honestly I think a better more simplistic matching would be:
“It may be the wrong decision, but fuck it, it's mine.”
Though one thing I can say about our... elegant protagonist:
“We all create stories to protect ourselves.”
Another continuity error here "reminded of a bad experience with the need it/want it spell." he hasn't had that happen to him here. Rarity and Pinkie used purely pheremones in this continuity.
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I left that in there on purpose. Nav got there around the start of season two. That means he was around for Lesson Zero. Just because he didn't write an event doesn't mean that event didn't happen. It's a fun little implication that I probably should remove, but won't.
3567325Oh, ok, thank you for the clarification. I should have realized it was a reference to lesson zero.
I think
Or
:3
Very good characterization of Chrysalis, imo!
"As long as it's inside the rules it doesn't matter how you win, just win baby!" -Al Davis
Nav is an Oakland Raider!
Is this referring to the first rape scene before the change?
if so probably needs changing(or i'm missing something)
Navarone knows far too much about Chrysalis and the changelings for having seen Chrysalis for only a minute or two before shooting her. And he's far too confident in what he knows. All before actually talking to Chrysalis.
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Such as? If she's hellishly skinny and talking about having to get food, it should be obvious she's starving. If she looks like a bug, claims to be a queen, and that getting food is her responsibility, killing her would be the same as killing all the changelings, thus genocide. If her plan to get food was to imprison all the ponies, she's obviously a bitch and probably evil. What did he know that he couldn't know from just using common sense?
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"In charge of feeding my people" does not mean the same as "my people are starving." McDonalds is in charge of feeding a great number of non-starving people.
He doesn't know anything about changelings. He might suspect starvation, but starvation is more than "just skinny." It comes with a host of other things like physical weakness that would be apparent even when standing still, lethargy, loss of focus, desperation, etc. He might be right, but he also can't know for certain that he is. Changelings might just be built that way.
This is complete and utter conjecture on his part - he can't possibly know that much about her motivations just from seeing a skinny changeling for no more than a couple minutes. Especially if he can't say for 100% certainty that she's actually starving. And his rather accommodating realization also flies in the face of what she has already done to him: imprisonment, impersonation, mind control, and general disregard for all the ponies at the wedding.
Again, he's basing very firm opinions on shaky ground. All alicorns disappearing wouldn't result in every pony starving to death, how does he know that Chrysalis is the only provider for every changeling? He doesn't. He still has yet to determine that changelings are actually starving. (He doesn't find out that drones might be essentially mindless until after this conversation.)
He can't possibly have anything more than suspicions at this point because he's just getting into his first conversation with her.
Nobody has told him that yet. Again, he might suspect it since Chrysalis was after emotions, but he can't know whether she gains any sustenance from regular, physical food.
He can't yet know any of that for the certainty that he's showing as he says all of this.
Again, the only thing he knows is that she's been alive for a long time according to Celestia. The conversation about how long she's actually been in charge hasn't occurred yet.
The implied argument is largely based on conjecture. Navarone doesn't yet know the answer any more than those he's talking to, and he's trying to make some vehement arguments based on things he could only suspect.
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He also reads a ton of books. Not everything that he reads in those books gets put into the journals. Cadance knew what changelings were, which meant their existence was in a book somewhere. That means Nav has read it, which happens to be the case here. That's why he knew what changelings were when Cadance told him that he was kidnapped by one, and he didn't question her. He also knew what naga were when Pinkie took him and Fluttershy to deal with them much earlier.
Maybe, but these are his diary entries. In them, what he thinks might as well be fact until proven otherwise. He assumes that she's starving because she is acting the way a starving thing would act, namely doing something incredibly dangerous for a small chance of food.
He's going off what she's saying. Namely, that she's doing such a thing because it's her job to get food. He's being somewhat optimistic, hoping for the best.
All signs of being either desperate or evil. But going off her speech, it paints her more as desperate than evil. Or at least, it does to Nav.
She looks like a bug and he knows from reading the books about them that changelings have several bug-like characteristics. It's fair for Nav to assume that she's like a queen ant. Kill her, the ants will eventually die off. And once again, he's also going off what she said, that it's her job to obtain food for the hive. She doesn't mention anyone else and if she's doing such a risky thing, it seems to reek of desperation.
Again, he's going off what she said. He understands the need to feed your family, though that doesn't make her methods fair or good.
He knows that from the books he read.
He's lying, at this point. He wants to placate Dash so she doesn't try to do anything stupid. He knows that all of what he said was conjecture, but it was logical conjecture. And again, there are the books he read.
The books would have mentioned her in at least passing. And he can assume that if she's been alive for a long time, she's probably be in charge for a long time.
Solely to placate the girls. He knows how impulsive some of them are. If he can make them see that Chrysalis might not be such a complete cunt (whether or not that's true), there's a better chance they won't do something really stupid. They're also more likely to be willing to talk to her.
I see what the main problem is. Nav was showing far too much confidence with all of his guesses and lies, and I don't think I explained in-story that he had read books about them beforehand. I'll go in and add some lines explaining those things.
Edit: Nav already said he read about them. That's within the first few paragraphs of the chapter. That's one thing I don't have to add.
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(At myself.)
I'd say that such things need a little revisiting when they come up again since there's a lot in in the chapter and the key lead-ins to some of the stuff (I read it in a book!) are really small. A little more uncertainty in what he says might also be a good idea since he is still using guesses (the queen ant comparison - which he never actually mentions) and never makes mention of anything being his opinion (like believing in/hoping for a less evil motivation).
Gothic literature coming to the rescue daa....daa...daaaaaaaa
Damn Finally someone gets it. I think funerals are usually (unless it ended in suicide) a time to celebrate a life lived well. I wanna make a rule when I die I want everyone there who makes a speech to not be able to cry and has to crack one wise ass joke about me. I also want everyone to have laughed at least once.
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I am one of the only go-betweens you have. I suggest changing 'go-betweens' with 'conduit' mate...
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http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/conduit
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/go-between
Which sounds closer? And which sounds more like something someone from Texas would say?
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That is scientifically proven. It's all about the blood. A human has more iron in their blood, so when it's exposed to oxygen, it oxidizes, or rusts. Insects on the other hand, have more copper in their blood, therefore turning it green when exposed to oxygen.
In the previous chapter, when Navarone was going down on Twilight, he tasted copper. I think it should be iron. Unless of course twilight is a bug.
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It does not rust. Haemoglobin gets converted to oxyhaemoglobin.
Blue, due to haemocyanin. Insects also use haemolymph instead of blood.
Why? It's just a taste. Blood plasma (which natural lubrication mostly consists of) doesn't taste of iron and contains little free iron.
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reminds me of this after so much sex
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Wow. That really does pretty much define Zeus.