Winter used to be the personal student of princess Luna before she was banished to the moon. Unfortunately, his disagreement with this decision caused Celestia to banish him as well; he was put to sleep until she determined he wake up.
That time is now, Luna has redeemed herself and Celestia can no longer detain Winter in good conscience.
However, Winter has had no time to his own thoughts for a thousand years, or a cleansing rainbow of harmony to set him back on the right path. Luna has tried her best to get him to change his thinking, but to no avail. Now Winter must learn about new Equestria and friendship from the best: Twilight Sparkle.
But not everything is as easy as cutting apple pie. Twilight and Winter do not get along in the slightest, eventually at a group outing their rivalry comes to a head and throws them into a world neither of them were prepared for. On their own, they now must learn to work together to return to Equestria.
I would like to give a Special Thanks to Nadake for helping me through the rough edges of ideas and editing on this story, she practically wrote half of chapter 1. If you haven't already, check out her work, it is amazing.
The input of Psyxoftheoros and Zap-Apple have both been invaluable as well .... Thanks a bunch all!!
Cover art by kitsukitsune ...Thank you!
Damn, your story looks really good! And by judging that you have The Immortal Game as one of your favorites, I can assume that you have good taste in fanfics.
This looks like an OC fic I really get into! Those Dark and Adventure tags put together like that...it makes the story seem very...
Unfortunately, I have much on my plate right now. Dual-linking fanfics to write (wish me luck on that!
), my re-read of The Immortal Game isn't even halfway complete yet, and an annoying Read Later list that somehow grows instead of shrinks and I also have work and real life to deal with as well.
I apologize greatly for this and I'm sure you deserve better but...Read Later list.
...I feel bad. Take a premature thumb.
Silver out!
Looks pretty good, fav'd for now and will read later.
1378808
Heh, thanks! Good luck with TIG, if there is any fanfic I'm trying to live up to in quality, it's that one.
1379876
Are you kidding me? I already gave up trying to live up to that kind of quality!
Silver out!
1381177
Haha! I admit, the better I get at this, the more I realize I suck lol. BUT, I'm NOT stopping in my quest for PERFECTION!
1381373
Neither am I! Fight on!
This one goes out to all my fellow fanfic writers out there...
We've got the hard knock life!
Peace!
Silver out!
Please tell me you have the next chapter already done. I think I'm gonna explode!
1386966
Haha, well, it is about half written. I am leaving this weekend on a trip and will have tons of time to work on it while on the road... so come early next week it should be up if I'm not a lazy.... something.
Interesting so far *sorry it took me so long to start reading
* My only issue is the lack of use of contractions when characters are speaking. For Winter it fits but Twilight typically speaks with contractions especially if she's excited and not focusing on what she's saying. By omitting contractions it makes her speech feel very stilted and formal and unlike her.
Appealing but this is a big issue here. you've told me the climax of the fight but you've yet to fully explain how things led up to it. We have no understanding of Winter's motivation besides he thinks Twilight to be selfish. Why? What has she down to make him think this? Has he said as much before now? It feels very conflicting to tell us a major point of the story without filling in all the gaps beforehand. It causes this to have far less impact than it should.
I'm gonna stop here as this needs some major work. Winter comes across as schizophrenic or perhaps like a little kid on a playground. One minute he hates Twilight the next he comes across as starting to be attracted to her. He feels like a little boy yelling cooties. As well since the main pieces haven;t been fleshed out this all feels confusing and disjointed.
The description of the scenery felt very confusing as well. After reading that chapter my impression of the world is it;s either colourless or grey or very faded. it seemed to keep changing and it wasn't clear if it looked like the castle or another area or near the cave (Which also has no spatial relation to wherever they are) The castle has no explanation, they could be at the old castle or one he built or something else entirely.
This is a really cool story and I think it had a lot of promise but it needs some serious work to reach it's full potential. Not unlike how Winter thinks of Twilight ;)
Is this story still incomplete?
6462211
It is very much on hiatus, good sir. I will pick it back up again when I feel I have the skills to make it what it should be.