Pretty in Pink

by DavidReinold

Pretty in Pink

It was wintertime, but any holiday cheer would have been in distasteful irony. There was nothing to be happy about.

Something was missing. A facet of life in Ponyville, something I had always taken for granted. I had never even considered that one day I might be without it. This facet took the form of a keen and bubbly mare who always wore a smile, and made a point to share that smile with everypony.

But she no longer wore a smile. Her eyes were closed and she was almost frowning. It was unnatural for her, and when I spun the thoughts around in my mind, I didn't like the conclusions I drew.

There would be no more parties.

There would be no more giggling.

In fact, Ponyville would be lucky if anypony was ever happy again.

* * *

My heart clouded over from the snowstorm of emotion.

* * *

After the procession, I sat in the library for what felt like hours. Just sitting there. Staring at the floor, avoiding thinking at all costs. At that point, thinking would have been rather masochistic, if not suicidal. There was too much to think about, and no good could have been drawn from thinking about it. Not even Rainbow Dash could clear the cloud that hung over Ponyville.

But try as I might to rid my mind of all semblance of thought, I couldn't keep the gears from turning. My mind wasn't conditioned to a lack of thought; I gave up and allowed myself to process it all.

It was all so sudden, this first inevitable thought entered my mind, and I let it run. One day she was the same giggly ball of fun who I'd spent nearly every day of my life in Ponyville with. Then the next day, she was...

I couldn't think any further. I pushed all my thoughts away again as the tears began to flow. I lay flat on the floor, with my teeth gritted, sobbing.

I remained there the rest of the evening, barely conscious. I hardly noticed when Spike gently lifted my head and put a pillow underneath. I only half-noticed when a minute later he lay a blanket over me.

I should have noticed sooner, was the last thought to cross my mind before sleep gripped me...

The next morning I woke up feeling dead inside.

* * *

The chill of the winter weather had penetrated my heart.

* * *

I lay in that same spot for several hours that morning. My body seemed to think that if I didn't do anything that day, perhaps the day just wouldn't happen at all.

But it was wishful thinking; that became clear when a soft tap at the door caught my attention. Then a voice followed.

"Twi? Can ah come in?"

I still stayed where I was for lack of energy, willpower or any semblance of motivation, so in my stead, Spike opened the door. Applejack wandered in and took a seat next to me.

"Ah just want ta' talk, is all. Ah've been gettin' a might restless and ah thought talking it over might do us both some good."

I grunted in acknowledgement.

"I's just...nopony saw it comin'. She must've known, but she di'nt tell anypony. Ah can only wonder why..."

I grunted again in acknowledgement. Applejack seemed frustrated at this.

"Well a might help yew are. Honestly, all ah want'd t'do was talk and here y'are can't hardly put in a word 'r two?"

Applejack got up and went back outside. A moment later I heard Rarity's voice. The two of them were talking. A second later Rarity came in.

"Come on. Get up."

"Why?" I barely mumbled the question.

"We're not going to let you sit here and rot from your own depression. Some fresh air will do you good."

I still refused to get up, so Rarity cast a levitation spell.

"Come on. We're leaving."

Against my will I was magically dragged outside.

"Where are you taking me?" I again mumbled. Rarity, instead of replying, sighed.

"You still have friends left, Twilight. Being one pony short does not justify neglecting the rest. We all need to cope, but if any coping is to be done, we need you to be there with us. And you know what else, Twilight?"

"What?" I asked, hardly caring but humoring her anyway.

"You need us there with you. That's a fact."

I was silent the rest of the trip.

* * *

The loneliness of the cold blinded me to my companions.

* * *

Sugarcube Corner was a bittersweet sight. Even more bittersweet was the fact that the rest of my friends stood there, but the frizzy-maned bouncing blur of pink was not among them. I closed my eyes and tried to shut it all out.

"Twilight, you need to stand up. Now," I heard Rarity's voice say. I scoffed silently. Easy enough for the independent one to say.

"Twi, ah can honestly say ah din't expect ya ta' crumble so easy-like," of course the farm pony would know all about keeping one's composure.

"Twilight, come on. She'd want us to move on. She'd hate to see us suffer for her," pfft, yeah, Rainbow Dash. The pony that was never fazed by anything. She would say that.

"Be strong, Twilight."

My eyes opened wide. That last one was Fluttershy.

Even Fluttershy, the most emotionally fragile pony I knew, was standing up tall. Even Fluttershy, the frail and tender pegasus who was afraid of everything was looking her emotions in the eye and staring them down, daring them to consume her.

Even Fluttershy.

I realized then and there that I was an absolute mess.

I closed my eyes tight and gritted my teeth again, preparing for the tears. Rarity released her levitation spell and I fell to the ground with a light thud. With this, I was pulled away from my emotions for a moment by what I felt around me.

The ground.

I hadn't noticed earlier, but there was a light snow on the ground.

Of course, I thought, it's winter.

Winter. The thought processed for a moment, after which I took a deep breath and stood up, tears in my eyes but a weak smile across my face.

"Anypony want to go ice skating?"

* * *

In the midst of icy despair, my heart began to thaw.

* * *

We all found skates and picked out a lake that had good, solid ice.

Rarity was absolutely right. The fresh air was like breathing in pure adrenaline. I was awake. I felt aware. The tears had long since crusted over and my eyes were dry. I felt like everything would be alright, and that the one who couldn't be here with us would be smiling down at us just knowing that we were doing what she always encouraged: having fun with each other.

I was just as horrible at skating as I was the previous time, during my first winter wrap-up experience. But this time, I was able to laugh at my mistakes. This time, I didn't have any goal to accomplish or task to complete.

This time, trying was all that mattered.

But there was still a fragment of that feeling at the pit of my stomach. I knew that my late friend would have wanted to be here for this. To be the one showing me how to skate.

It still tore me up a bit that she didn't get a chance to do at least that.

After an hour or so of skating, and copious amounts of tear-ridden giggling, we all headed over to Sweet Apple Acres, where Applejack had a roaring fire going and apple pies baking in the oven.

"Glad ta' see ya've come 'round, Twi," Applejack commented as she poured cider for all of us, "I was worried about ya."

I sipped the warm cider gingerly. The transition from cool, fresh air to warm, welcoming cider worked wonders on my mind.

"Thanks, Applejack," I paused for a moment to take another sip, "I just...it was upsetting to me particularly...when I was just a filly, Princess Celestia told me that I had more latent talents waiting to be uncovered. One of those talents was supposedly the ability to see the future. And so in the back of my mind this entire time, I've been wondering why that latent ability couldn't have surfaced sooner. If I could have foreseen what was going to happen, I might have...okay, maybe I couldn't have prevented it, but I could have made her last weeks more enjoyable. More fun. More...something, at least."

"You know, Twilight," Fluttershy cut in, "if you really feel bad about it, there's one thing you could do to get it off your mind."

"Oh? And what's that?"

"You could talk to Nurse Redheart and ask her for details. I'm sure she'll tell you what you want to know."

I mulled this over. It did seem like a good idea...there was the slightest hint of dread, but I ignored that.

I finished my cider, partook in some apple pie, and thanked Applejack for everything before leaving to find Nurse Redheart's office.

* * *

In my heart, the sun crept through the clouds.

* * *

"So, what was the issue?" I asked Nurse Redheart. I almost wasn't sure she heard me. My voice was dry and cracked. I suspected it didn't want me to talk; in the back of my mind, I was terrified of what the answer might be.

Nevertheless Nurse Redheart responded a moment later with a sigh.

"She came in about two years ago asking about some symptoms she was having. Well, as it would turn out...she was very ill. I told her she had a year to live, and upon hearing this, she told me not to tell anypony until after she was gone. That was winter of two years ago.

"But then in the summer a year and a half ago, she met you, and she began to get strong again. I don't much specialize in psychology, but I suspect that your presence in her life gave her something to live for. Her heart no longer beat for herself but for somepony else. Twilight, I think the friendship you offered her prolonged her life greatly."

After this, Nurse Redheart paused, and her demeanor changed slightly. When she spoke again there was an air of bitterness.

"But then you changed, Twilight. You began to tire of her antics. You misinterpreted her desperate cry for help as hyperactivity and pretended not to notice. That upset her. She couldn't make you smile anymore. And if her friends weren't smiling, she had no reason to smile, either. She lost her will to live because you passed her actions off as just her typical silliness.

"Twilight Sparkle, you killed Pinkie Pie."

I stepped back a pace in shock.

"What...what are you saying?"

"You brought about the end of her life, plain and simple. By neglecting her you failed to prolong her life, and so, in essence, you killed her."

"No! I never neglected her! I always appreciated her optimism and carefree attitude!"

"You took her for granted! You made her feel unappreciated and unloved! All that time you kept telling yourself 'she's just being Pinkie Pie', but you never bothered to understand why!"

I had no response. I was completely taken aback by these accusations. But the worst part of it...was that it all rang true. Before I could ponder this thought, however, Nurse Redheart continued.

"Celestia's favorite student...with the latent ability to forsee the future-"

"How do you know about that?!"

"-if only you had seen it this time. You might have appreciated Pinkie Pie and undone the damage before it was too late."

She gave a shudder and began to change shape.

"You killed her, Twilight Sparkle."

She grew taller, and her shadow enveloped the room.

"You killed her, Twilight Sparkle."

Her face grew darker.

"You killed her, Twilight Sparkle."

Her voice twisted into a demonic tome.

"yOU kIllEd hEr, twIlIght spArklE."

At that moment, I hear a distant voice. It sounded like Pinkie Pie saying wake up! Wake up, Twilight!

"You kIlleD her, TwilIght SparKle."

Wake up, Twilight!

"YoU kIlLeD hEr, TwIlIgHt SpArKlE."

Wake up, Twilight!

"YOU KILLED HER, TWILIGHT SPARKLE!"

"TWILIGHT, WAKE UP!"

I awoke with a start. It was no longer winter, but rather, mid-summer. I was rather confused and it took me a moment to get my bearings, but that moment was still working itself through when I heard a pounding at the front door and a subsequent blur of a pony zooming through it.

"Wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up!"

Pinkie Pie was bouncing around the room excitedly. I blinked the drowsiness out of my eyes and tried to comprehend what was going on.

It never happened, I thought, it was all a dream.

I inhaled steeply, and let out a difficult breath.

A dream, maybe, but definitely not fiction. I thought it all through. There was nothing made up about our relationship, I realized. I had been very much been taking Pinkie Pie for granted.

I took that opportunity to make a change.

Still a bit upset from the dream, I got up and walked over to Pinkie. She appeared confused as I buried my face in her pink, frizzy mane that only fell flat when her heart clouded over. I sighed.

"...I'm glad we met. And...I'm glad we're friends."

"Twilight, what's up? Did you have a scary dream?"

"Yeah...something like that."

I took a deep breath, but caught myself short when I felt Pinkie Pie give a slight tremble.

"Er...Pinkie...are you feeling alright?"

"Yep, I'm super-duper-spectacular!"

"...Are your Pinkie senses giving you any trouble?"

"Nope! They haven't acted up at all since Froggy Bottom Bog. Twilight, what's up?"

"Um...no reason. You're sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine!"

She shuddered again.

She was lying. There was something wrong with her. After a second, it clicked.

Princess Celestia told me that one day I'd be able to see the future.

It wasn't a dream at all. It was a vision. Pinkie Pie was actually dying.

Why else would she hide that she was ill?

It all added up. I'd been given a second chance at this, an opportunity make things right, and I wasn't going to let it slip by.

The important thing, I realized, was not to tell Pinkie Pie that I knew. Doing so would make her prolonged happiness that much more difficult to achieve. I needed to make sure she knew she was appreciated, and I couldn't do that if she thought I was only doing this to make her happy. That just wouldn't work at all.

"So Pinkie....what do we have going on today?"

She grinned wildly.

"I have no clue! Let's go find out!"

I smiled weakly, and felt a pang of guilt that could only come from understanding. What she did, she did to make her friends happy. If they weren't having a good time, she couldn't either.

We spent that day like we would have spent any other: having fun with the rest of our friends. Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash were hanging out in the meadow, so we decided to join them for a while. Pinkie, as it turned out, got along with Angel extremely well. I never realized how interesting a day in that meadow could be. Every time I had visited before, there were tasks to complete, issues to sort out. I never stopped to appreciate it.

We stayed there past nightfall, and when Luna brought out the moon we watched the fireflies light up the sky.

Afterwards, I walked Pinkie back to Sugarcube corner, and said goodnight.

"Twilight, thanks for being there today. I had a great time."

"Yeah, so did I!"

Pinkie stifled a slight tremble. I pretended not to notice.

The days passed like this. And each day, Pinkie was just as lively as the previous day.

Winter came, and I began to worry. This was the time of year I had seen in my dream. Before it was too late, I decided to make one last change. I stopped by Sugarcube corner one weekend.

"Hey, Pinkie, I have a favor to ask..."

"Yes, Twilight?"

"Would you mind...showing me how to ice skate?"

The pink pony's face lit up.

"Well of course, Twilight! Wait right there, I'll get my skates!"

* * *

The future I had seen shattered before my eyes.

* * *

Winter came and passed.

Pinkie Pie, though still showing a tremble now and then, was still bouncing around and having a good time.

And every single day that passed with Pinkie Pie still alive and throwing parties, I counted as a little victory. Days turned into months. Months turned into years. I counted every victory, and I never forgot a single one. I celebrated exactly five thousand, seven hundred and twenty four of these victories - that's fifteen years, seven months, a week and two days - before Pinkie Pie threw her final party and drifted off into infinite sleep.

At the procession, I stepped up to the alter and took a last look at my good friend. I shed a tear, but rather than holding bitterness in my heart, I held a smile on my face.

"Goodbye...and...thanks for being an awesome friend."

Comments

[Rudolf]

I'm feeling melancholy.

Beautiful story, it remind you to do not take thing for granted.

Wow that was a emotional trip to me
Very good Job

This, as Hawkeye Pierce would say, is finest kind; it's also the antidote to the whole Cupcakes meme. That being said, when can we expect to see it on Equestria Daily.

[Rex Moya]

Sad...but it taught a lesson.

[Violet Droplet]

I-I... I've never been so deeply moved by a story. As it started out, I didn't really feel much of anything except a little, almost unnoticeable tightening in my chest. As the story went on it turned into a feeling of dread, then a couple light sniffles here and there, followed by full on sobs.

Then came the mid-point, at which I felt a little sprinkle of hope. In the end though I don't think I've ever cried, in both happiness and sadness, quite as hard as this.

You... You've earned my respect.

[BrianBlessedPony]

Well done, that is all I can say, well done.

[Marrock]

Bloody well done indeed.

[DavidReinold]

Wow! I didn't expect this to evoke such a positive response so quickly! I guess it's true what they say about writing with sincerity. Seriously, within less than 24 hours of posting it having 8 comments, 2 favs and a solid 5.0 rating from 8 people? Wow! And to think I almost didn't send this!

And I just sent it to Seth a few hours ago. Hopefully I'll be getting some pre-reader comments on it pretty soon. It'd be nice to get this on EqDaily. :)

[Papillon Rose]

Ah, damnit. I said I wasn't gonna tear up over this one.

And then I got to the end. ;_;

[lilinuyasha]

I was not expecting to tear up. Didn't cry, but teared up. This was exceptionally well done. I give my kudos to you, sir/ madam. It's been an honor reading that. You have a great natural poetic ability. Next time, try something a little happy.

[DavidReinold]

3173 My other story, "Unfair Shipping" is a comedy (sort of). I put that one on hold to do this because I'd had these feelings floating around for a while and I thought if I wrote a fanfic about them, I might work out my writer's block and get things going again. :)

[BlueEricsson]

Masterpieces like this are why i dont read Tragedies.

Listen to The Flaming Lips song "Do You Realize??" during this. The song is the exact idea of don't take things for granted, and that life is fantastic. It + this brings tears to my eyes. Fantastic story bud. Gorgeous.

[DavidReinold]

3192 Love the Flaming Lips, but I didn't even notice that influence had worked it's way in there until you mentioned it. Which is weird, because in the middle of writing this I went to go see their concert at Somerset.

[linktopower]

You know i would love to rate this.
but alas i dont know how to rate <_<
I give it 5 star rating

[ScyStorm]

Oh my god. That was seriously amazing.

It would be the crime of crimes if this didn't make it onto Equestria Daily. A lot more people need to read this, and see your reasoning for writing it. That's what led me to read it in the first place.

Now you need to write something that's far more happier, just to balance things out. ;) Perhaps something Pinkie-centric. I'll look forward to reading it.

[Several Alpacas]

Well done Davie.

[littlerobotbird]

You had me until precognition came in...then you had me again...and then you lost me again.

I want to like this story a lot more than I do, but with the whole Twilight guilt-tripping herself and then having that guilt apparently justified so oddly...I dunno. It almost feels like you're guilting the audience via Twilight at times and it feels more soapbox than fic when that happens.

Maybe I'm just peeved at Pinkie dying anyways...maybe if the ending was more ambiguous and this was more focused on valuing things that are transitory and fleeting I'd appreciate this more...

The downer ending just feels so...defeating.

[Lord Xaos]

hmm...I happen to be writing an "anti-Cupcakes" fic of sorts myself.

I went a different route, pitting Pinkie against Cupcakes Pinkie (although it seems that Silent Ponyville beat me to it the same as well as Crisis: Equestria is going to capitalize on that idea, at least according to the cover art it will in future chapters.)

I must say that the concept of Pinkie's disappearance affecting ponies presented in this story intrigued me, and has inspired a certain exchange between the real Rainbow Dash and "Dark" Pinkie I would like to use in my upcoming chapter....if that's okay with you.

Actually...this story is like "Rocket to Insanity" but in Reverse! And it just so happens that Rocket Rainbow is present for this freaky party as well.

[Black Alicorn]

You better make a sequel buddy.....

Cupcakes 2 is out.......

[Black Alicorn]

Sorry,just woke up at the time didn't know what I was writing.

Still....Cupcakes 2.....

[Octavian]

Wow, that story took all the words away from my mouth.
It's just simply amazing, in any and every way.

[Brony Tom]

Hoover Dam! I loved it! The part where she was dreaming, and then the dream was a vision, and HOT DAM THAT WAS GREAT!

3194 Ah! I'm jelly. I wish i could see them live...they aren't coming round my location though. But yeah, i was sitting reading the story, and with that song it was just....Woah..heavy. Love it.

[FeroMcPigletron]

That was AWESOME! I knew it was a precognition dream (but for a few seconds I thought that Redheart was Celestia in disguise) and I figured what would happen but I still cheered with 'Winter came and passed'. I was tearing up like the others.

What a GREAT story! :D

[DeathMetalPony]

That was beautiful!

[Violet Droplet]

The first time I read it I couldn't help but break down crying. I've had a few days to mull it over, and to be honest I didn't think it'd effect my like that a second time around. Even with this little bit of time to think about it, I still found myself tearing up a little bit.

I didn't cry... but only just barely. It really is a masterpiece and reflects your love and respect of the character.

[MeanMrs.Mustard]

Even though I saw it coming, the dream still scared me.
To all those who say the ending is a "downer," it's not! Sure, Pinkie dies, but she's ready to die, and that's why it's a happy ending. Everypony dies, but there are sad deaths and happy deaths. Pinkie Pie died happy.

[Alexander-Crossover]

A beautiful story Pinkie's will is stronger than anyone could imagine.

[littlerobotbird]

3392
And that's where I could not disagree more... there are no happy deaths. None. At best you can have a bittersweet death/end, which is how I read this. A gone Pinkie leaves an unhappy void, no matter how you look at it... but then again, this story wasn't really so much about Pinkie, anyways. This was Twilight's story.

Still think it was largely well written, though, so don't mistake me on that.

[Lord Xaos]

3411 I do have to agree with you there about "happy deaths."

Its actually why Watership Down's ending was unsatisfactory. I mean, supposedly this was a happy ending because even though the story was basically about bunnies dying. Here's the protagonist dying of old age (or possibly some preventable disease that rabbits can't treat). Old age, rather than death by eagle, train, car, rapid dog, gunshot, war with other rabbits, or putty tat.

That's not really a happy ending. That's more like "your scraped knee (and been subject to all the nightmare fuel of the story of Watership Down) will heal in time, but hey. At least you don't have cancer. Aren't you happy you don't have cancer? Isn't it exciting that you are cancer free? Isn't it the best thing that ever happened to you and ever will happen to you that you do not, at the moment, have cancer?"

(Sorry, I always wig out over Watership Down.)

There is one other thing that bothers me. Twilight should've found out for certain. If the dream was true, then Nurse Redheart would likely know. Or at least Pinkie would betray symptoms. What she does with the knowledge afterwards is up to Twilight, but...

It could end up shortening Twilight's lifespan to have unanswerable worries about whether or not she is "Killing" Pinkie Pie at any given second. I mean, Twilight may have been right about Pinkie not being truly happy if she's doing it to make Twilight feel relieved but....

It goes the other way around. And its a thin line between the two helping each other and hurting each other. And...I kind of think the long term benefits of Pinkie being honest with her friends should at least be explored.

I still love the story.

*bawls eyes out and collapses*

[Sheepotato]

Wow, almost cried, almost.
This is so great, it really made me feel a sense of bitter sweet: sure, Pinkie died, but Twilight got to make her days the best thing they could be. good job.

Having Depression, I was expecting this story To have a very adverse effect on me.

Instead, I just gave the story a simple nod. It was Very good and the Lesson is Great.

Although the only Thing i got from this was a slight weight in my chest, it still came across as heart felt and very good.

think Twilight here had it pretty bad in that dream from one death than some people have had combined due to their close relationship. Guess that is why Twinkie is my Favorite shipping Pair...

It was short, but that added to its effect, 2000 words of sad That deserve more attention than they are actually receiving.

I tip my metaphorical hat to you Sir/Madam

Wish I had Friends to apply this lesson to...

[Alexander-Crossover]

I was thinking of the perfect song for this, and "you are my sunshine" seems to go so well. I'd have loved to see a scene where her friends sing that song to her when she finally can't fight her disease anymore.

[Ponyman]

Damnit...now I'll never be able to look at the show the same way again.

Knock knock knockin on heaven's door....

[Irrelevant Brony]

It felt like you skipped around a lot. From the coping with thing to Twilight trying to keep Pinkie alive. I suppose that is the only way you could have pulled this off, but it was kind of awkward how you just did a 180 like that.

Nonetheless, It was a pretty damn good story and my heart sank at those last lines.

And now I have http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHHVcfUNwew&ob=av3n stuck in my head. Thank you.

Lovely story. I'll agree with others that it was a little awkward at times, but you trolled the hell out of me. I came here expecting to be mad at another Grimdark story, and came out smiling at a very sweet tale.

Pinkie only lives for 15 years after this?

This is a masterpiece. I almost expected Twilight to tell everypony the true story at the end, but alas, did not. an amazingly well-written and heart felt piece of literature that is pure awesome. I feel like Pinkie's REAL death deserved a little more attention to it.

Stories about Pinkie Pie dying like this are always so sad. All the cheer she brings to everyone, only for it to be torn away to never be enjoyed again.

[fieryShaman]

Very touching... it got to the point I couldn't make out the words through the tears.

I

That was sad
It would break my heart if Pinkie Pie was dying like that

I shed manly tears......

Aww, who am I kidding? I cried like a little bitch.
That was very well done.

Two best friends for life

[DavidReinold]

3530 Damn, now the comments are starting to make ME cry... it's resonating...

Short and painfull and bittersweet. A good read still.
Thank you.

No tears over here, though I have a heart of pure iron... it takes a LOT to make me cry.

That said, this was pretty good for a short story... good work!