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When the Cake's go away for a weekend trip, leaving Pinkie home, Rarity steps in to offer her pink friend a place to stay for a few days so she won't be alone. With the two stuck under a roof together and Rarity slowly seeing a side of her friend she never knew existed, will romance blossom or will friendships crumble?
Special thanks to HabitualHyperbole for editing the chapters.
A small, three part story I've had in mind for a while. My first and probably only shipping story I'll do. It is heavily inspired by party of one, trying to show a different side of the excitable pink mare everyone knows and loves. As a note while the first chapter is a bit sad the story does get happier in the next chapters.
Good concept, adds some more dimensions to Pinkie Pie. But, I suggest looking for an editor or at least proof-reading your story more than once. There were simple mistakes, minor spelling errors, but the most glaring would be the mistake between "your" and "you're".
Tip: Reread each chapter aloud to catch the mistakes.
Also, I know you're going for creative language and all, but there is a time and place for that. In the beginning, for example, you continually referred Pinkie as "the pink mare" or "the pink pony" which is fine in moderation of course. But seeing that done consistently can get rather tiring.
Tip: When first introducing a new character, refer to the character in as a creative way as possible, however, after that alternate between creative methods and their name.
Otherwise, it feels like a rookie mistake.
Okay! I would just like to thank everypony who has read, favorited, commented, and thumbed up this chapter. In under twenty-four hours this story has managed to become my most popular story and frankly I am amazed, because when I wrote this I only expected like... maybe five favorites, three thumbs up? One comment if I was lucky? And that was over the span of a week. So thank you very much everypony who has taken the time to check this out and I'm really hoping you are all enjoying reading it as much as I am writing it.
>>1089164 I will be going back and rechecking the first chapter once I finish the second. Thanks for the constructive criticism. Sadly I currently have only one person editing my work for me, and that person is only doing one of my stories, the others I have to edit myself. I do intend to find a proof reader eventually ofcourse. But I just haven't had much time to look into it yet.
And one last thing. The next chapter is well on it's way and should be done in a few days. I'm doing a big chunk of it every day.
"Ofcourse it will dear. Ofcourse it will."
Missing spaces here. And then there's the already mentioned "your/you're"-errors.
Aside from that, it's pretty good so far. I might actually be willing to proofread for you... if you want
At any rate, I'll be tracking to see where it goes.
Okay the newest chapter is up, and as such there is only one more chapter to go, plus a short epilogue. Next chapter should be up in a few days depending on if I get writers block or not. I hope everyone enjoys this chapter as much as they did the last one. I've had a lot of fun writing this story and I think I might try my hands at writing a romance again down the line once I get some of my other, longer stories farther along. One of the key reasons I wrote RariPie was cause I heard it was so rare and I thought they would be kind of cute together. Are there any other rare couples ponies would like to see?
Love the story so far, but certain parts in it really annoy me.
First, there's the (by this point when it comes to Pinkie Pie) cliche evil voice in her head that acts like a character. Depression doesn't work like that. I think the problem is that you want to make sure we know what she's feeling, but instead of letting her sadness speak for itself, you just add the voice in the head trick.
Next, you have them acting in-character (which I love), except for a few places. For one, I found it slightly hard to believe that Pinkie (who has been cooking for a long time most likely) managed to slip on an egg shell of all things and destroy everything. That seems too clumsy even for her. Second, she's been to the spa before (the one with the newspaper, can't remember the name), so she probably wouldn't have done all that. Speaking of which, you're going way too far with having her act childish while ignoring the fact that she can be calm when she needs to be (again, the fact that she was at the spa, causing no problems, with none of them having an issue with her being there). Of course, considering that it is Pinkie, I can let that slide and deal with it.
What really bothered me was how harsh Rarity was. In fact, the entire thing was basically the episode with Sweetie Belle being replaced by Pinkie Pie. She even mentions it, which I can only guess was added for the people who by that point already figured it out. But the biggest issue I had with Rarity was that completely idiotic statement at the end about how she didn't even know Pinkie could actually get upset. Did she just lose all her intelligence right then? She's even seen her upset before, so how could she actually think that? Honestly, that was just completely out-of-character for her to say.
That aside, I do enjoy this story despite the few issues I have with it, and look forward to seeing how you end it.
>>1105989 You're right, the last one was out of character for Rarity, and while it wasn't how I meant it to be, it did come across as rather silly of her to think. I have since edited it.
>>1123133 >>1123839 >>1123898 >>1124265 Thanks. I was honestly worried the most about this chapter, since I was afraid it was badly drawn out, happy to see people enjoyed it. There is still an epilogue to follow, but for the most part the story is done, now it's just wrapping everything up nice and tight. I might return to write a second part of the story eventually or at least mention some of its effects in upcoming shipping fics.
>>1124335 One more chapter! Yay! I just didn't want it to end right there as if it did it would have felt very...odd, I guess? Not exactly sure what the word I'm looking for is... 
But you've done this very well. I'm not even a fan of Pinkie/Rarity, and I love it. Your pacing is good, and I love how you have the build up to the kiss ALL WEEKEND. So umm...no, it isn't badly drawn out. At all.
And it is finished! I hope everyone enjoys reading it, I had a lot of fun writing it. Special thanks to HabitualHyperbole for editing the chapters so they are nice and pretty. Also, special thanks to Duelist925 for convincing me the story was good enough to post. Thanks to all my readers and I hope you find my future stories just as enjoyable.
That was a fantastic lil RariPie story with a huge amount of Dawwwwwwwwwww.
I did think though that you went a lil overboard with Pinkie, really we only see her do that totally once and that is at the Gala, well, go nuts in a place that isn't appropriate or wanting it. Plus I thought that Rarity's reaction to it actually wasn't angry enough considering how she was woken up with a gong and having stuff splatted on her face.
But I've got a weakness for Pinkie ships and Rarity is my favorite pony so keep up the great work.
Ok, thumbs up for the comedy, but the romance was background mostly. Cant get behind this romance, very little build up and when you have the issue actually confronted it was out of the way in a paragraph. Also no climax of the story, it really seems like a long rolling joke, and while funny the romance felt like filler. 
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! omfg!! dat ending! lolololol. Dude, u are amazing! i laughed until my stomach hurt and I couldn't breathe and I had tears coming from my eyes and i just wanted so much more to read and...." Pinkie comes out of nowhere and places hoof over my mouth. "No! That's my job!!!!" 
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