• Published 22nd Dec 2011
  • 59,561 Views, 2,394 Comments

Over the Edge and Through the Wood - JarOfHearts



Human gets cut off from his group while traversing a mountain. Finds himself in a strange land.

  • ...
86
 2,394
 59,561

Retaliatory Trespassing

Chapter 9

Retaliatory Trespassing

Edited by: CosmicAfro
Pre‐read by: Neko- and OnederMan

“All right, Twilight. You can do this. You've faced dragons, hydras and manticores, this is nothing,” the lone unicorn assured herself, though her nerves were getting the better of her.

“Deep breath. Okay, first things first. Locate the creature and initiate contact.”

She looked about the entryway. It didn't appear to be in the main hall.

“Of course it could be hiding behind any one of those pillars.”

She brushed the thought aside, deciding to take a closer look at the room. Not much had changed from her last visit, though truth be told she really didn’t make time to take in the scenery. The central altar was more or less untouched, and the only real sign that anything had been here recently was a smoldering fire pit. Other than that she could see a pair of doors leaning haphazardly against their frame. She was unsure if the creature had placed them there or rather she simply had not noticed. She was in a bit of a hurry the last time she was here, what with the whole eternal night and everything.

“Hello?” The trespassing mare called out. “Anypo‐ Anything here?”

Only her echo answered.

Twilight slowly crept into the shadowy halls; the creature had just walked in a minute ago, where could it have gone?

There were multiple passageways leading away from the main entryway. The determined, if not slightly terrified diplomat wandered through the halls, occasionally calling for the creature. She meandered through what was left of the ground floor, only to find nothing. Her patience was wearing thin, as was her courage.

She turned to the last place she had to look, twin staircases leading up to the two towers the Princesses had resided in over a thousand years before. She really didn’t want to, after a millennia of neglect this place was far from structurally sound. Yet, her scholarly side was begging to know something; this had once been her mentor’s home. Could it be the same as her quarters in Canterlot?

Twilight shook her head. She had to focus, this was about making contact with an undiscovered species, not her mentor’s taste in furnishings. Still, she decided to take the staircase with her teacher’s namesake sun cutie mark chiseled into its door frame.

As she ascended the staircase her mind wondered what she might find. Had the creature nested here for some unknown purpose or did it happen upon the castle by chance? As Twilight reached the stair’s apex she noticed the door was ajar, practically announcing the presence of her quarry.

I wonder why it would be here of all places? And why the castle to begin with?

She suddenly had an unbidden mental picture of the creature lounging on the Princess's old bed while sipping a cup of tea in her old fluffy bathrobe. Its legs were crossed in a regal fashion and it was wearing a monocle. She pictured herself entering the room and being greeted with a jovial lift of the cup as it invited her to enjoy some freshly baked biscuits.

She stifled a giggle at the imagined image, her private laugh slightly lifting some of the anxiety from her shoulders. Smiling, she lifted her hoof and gave three sharp knocks on the door.

“Hello, Anypo‐ body home?” she called out as she slowly pulled the door back to reveal the contents of the room.

Sadly, the creature was not one of them.

Giving an annoyed huff, she cast a curious eye around her mentor's old dwelling.

She gave the collapsed four poster bed a once over, one could barely tell if somepony could have ever slept on it comfortably. What with the metal wiring and spring box being the only thing left to indicate it was actually a bed and not just an overturned table. Looking at it now, nopony would have guessed that at one time, the diarch of the sun slept upon this metal rat's nest.

Looking around a little more she could spot a large overturned wardrobe and her mentor's old desk, but it was an off shade, like it had been dyed crimson.

Then she noticed the lump.

On top of the desk, with various cords running under it, was a loose garment that had been draped over...

…Something she couldn’t immediately identify, but she could see wet stains seeping out into the cloth covering.

She suddenly felt ill.

She wanted to turn away, but her hooves remained rooted where they were on the stone floor.

She tried to look at anywhere but the desk, but her curiosity was slowly creeping its way into the forefront of her mind.

What was under the sheet? Had it been preparing food? Could it have been... meat?

As she found herself examining the desk she noticed a series of braided vine cords nailed to the edge of the desk, each one running under the garment concealing...

...What?

She couldn’t take it anymore and reached out with her magic, surrounding the cloth with a purple aura.

However, before she could reveal what lay underneath she felt a slight twinge from her horn as the magic surrounding the veil vanished.

Twilight blinked uncomprehendingly at the defiant piece of fabric.

She tried to lift it, but her magic winked out of existence as soon as it appeared once more.

The element of magic, sole student of Princess Celestia and recognized as one of the most powerful practitioners of the craft stood absolutely thunderstruck. This was her area of expertise, how could a rag of all things get the better of her!

Approaching the desk, her unease and hesitation completely forgotten, she examined the garment. It was completely unimpressive, and appeared insignificant at first glance. There was no aura of magic, no runes, sign of regents, nothing to indicate that the cloth was enchanted at all.

Squeezing her eyes shut, Twilight reached out with her mind to try to feel whatever sorcery was bound to the fabric and opening herself to the world. She could immediately feel an ancient enchantment reverberating through the brick and mortar of the tower. A spell old as antiquity, she could feel the vast age of the protective ward, nowhere near as strong as it once was, but it still holding. Now she could sense the wild and untamed magic that seemed to permeate the Everfree, it filled the air around her and seemed to seep into everything it touched, as she could tell where most everything was, provided it was close enough.

...But something was wrong.

She couldn’t feel the fabric, it felt like there was nothing there at all.

No enchantment. No magic, wild or otherwise. Nothing. It was like something had been cut out of the universe and a hole had been left behind.

She slowly opened her eyes and picked up the cloth with her hoof with a certain amount of reverence.

There were very few objects that could simply stop magic, most of which were legendary artifacts with unknown origins. But to be silent, to give off no magic of its own was unheard of.

Twilight examined the unremarkable garment with a sense of both awe and bewilderment, for such a valuable artifact to be left lying around acting as a covering for a corpse was inconceivable.

Granted, its mundane appearance would make it an unlikely target for theft, but still it was the principle that counted.

Before she could further ponder the implications of such a thing her attention was wrested from the fabric to the contents of the table.

The remains of what had obviously been a cockatrice were splayed out on the table. Most of its reptilian skin had been removed, showing the organs within. The rib cage had been broken into pieces. The face had most of its muscles removed on the side that was exposed. All the while, any skin that had been cut away had been pulled taut with the cords nailed to the desk, making the corpse appear like it was writhing in agony.

Twilight took a step back, and then another.

Back in the clearing, the corpses of the Timberwolves had been unnerving, but those were just plants! Creatures many believed to be nothing more than piles of wood animated by the Everfree’s wild magic.

She had read studies that pertained to dissections, even saw a few diagrams and drawings here and there.

This was on a completely different level, the smell of gore and the sightless yet staring eyes of the dead. The stains, the ropes, the desk itself gripped, nay, demanded her focus. She desperately wanted to stop staring at the morbid scene before her but her eyes refused to tear themselves away.

The rattled mare continued to back away from the horrible scene.

She backed away until her rump hit something solid, staring at what would likely haunt her nightmares for the next year.

Finally she managed to close her eyes and tried to focus on breathing, she had come here with a purpose after all. She couldn’t allow herself to be distracted.

Twilight noticed something odd about the wall she was leaning against. First off it felt like she had backed into a corner or in between two poles. On top of that she could feel cloth against her fur.

For a moment her mind spun in circles, the tower was round. There were no corners for her to back into. On top of that there were no tapestries on the walls, they had rotted away centuries ago.

So what was...

It clicked before she could even turn around.

It was here.

She turned her head slowly, begging to be wrong.

She was not.

Standing over her was the creature, its upper body still bare with its oddly shaped forelimbs crossed in front of its chest. Looking down at her with an unreadable expression.

A million thoughts tore through Twilight's mind, some questions, most all having to do with fear and alarm. Images of all the things that could go wrong. Of her on that desk.

The maelstrom inside the pony’s mind locked her body in place. The urges to flee, to fight, to hide, and to beg, all conflicting with one another, glued her hooves to the stone floor.

Only two words managed to pass through the hurricane of thought and escape her lips.

“Oh, Ponyfeathers.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A little while ago..

Troy was observing the current entrance to his new abode with scrutiny. More specifically, the hinges on one of the double doors. They had a tendency to squeak when opened. Well actually it was more of a deep moan, but terminology wasn’t a priority at the moment. Inside the man a battle of epic proportions raged, should he try to find some way of oiling it? He knew that there were ways of refining the body fat of various animals into oil so it wasn’t out of the question.

The man crouched and started to tap his chin in contemplation. On one side, it would allow him to use the door quietly and the ruckus the rusted metal made could be very grating. On the flip side it did add some ambiance to the entrance, it was the sound you expected when you entered an ancient castle. Plus, it would disallow intruders to sneak in unobstructed. Add in the time figuring out how to make oil from body fat and the decision was made.

Siding with equal parts practicality and laziness, Troy began to stand.

It’s not like I need anything more on my platter. Maybe it’s time to make some shutters for the windows. Fortify the place a bit. The way things are, those are a security nightmare.

As he was about to turn he heard the crunching of gravel coming from the other side of the door.

The wayward wanderer froze, staring disbelievingly at the metal portal to the outside world.

What the hell, this place is abandoned! What would come here in the middle of the afternoon!?

He crouched by the entrance, if the door did in fact open, it would obstruct him from the view of... whatever.

Troy began to go over the list of suspects in his mind.

Manticore: Not likely, the tree bridge is gone and I don’t think it could cross the monkey bridge.

Wooden wolf things: Again, not likely for the same reasons.

Horse things? … well there were a few that were capable of flight. So it is possible, but none of them have a reason to come‐

An aura of purple washed over the door frame.

All thoughts were silenced as a single image filled the young man’s mind. A brilliant flash the exact same coloration, with a pony to match. A flash that let that damnable quadruped cross distances in an instant. It was the only thing that had reason to come to the castle, the children he had sheltered the night before had probably made some mention of him. And now the lavender one had come in pursuit.

The doors slowly swung inward, but not far enough to be pressed against the wall and deprive him of cover. Once the glittering aura dissipated he silently moved into the shadow it provided.

He waited a beat, nothing passed through the portal.

What is it waiting for, a written invita‐

Suddenly a loud whinny caused the crouching hiker to flinch, reaching for knife and resting his hand on the hilt.

Another beat passed and finally he heard the telltale clip‐clop of hooves on stone.

He saw the shadow first, cast by the afternoon sun. The silhouette showed enough to confirm his suspicions; long hair (mane?) and a horn. When the purple pursuer came into view, Troy felt itchy all over. This thing had followed him all the way out here, for what reason? Even if he did break into her home he hadn’t taken anything of value...

...The sapphire.

It was all he could do to keep from smacking himself.

Ok, calm. You can do this YOU STUPID MOTHER FUCKER!

Troy squeezed down on the hilt of his knife, mentally berating himself for this thoughtlessness. After a moment his frustration had passed he turned his attention back to the figure of the trespassing equine, who was now examining his fire pit.

After a moment of looking around the oddly colored creature seemed to choose a hallway at random and waltzed away into the confines of the dilapidated castle that Troy called home.

Given a moment to himself, Troy went over his current options.

1. Confront
2. Attack
3. Hide

Confrontation was not exactly his favorite option as it could bleed into situation number two without the benefit of surprise. In a perfect world he would march up to her to and tell her to hit the bricks. But then of course the pony would just attack him instead.

Or would it?


Troy paused for a moment, noticing the hoof‐falls had returned and leaned out slightly from behind the door. The purple intruder was still making a racket as it used its purple glowy stuff to move the doors he had set against the exposed hallway. It let out one more high pitched whinny before it continued its fruitless search.

Is it trying to call for me? If it was trying to catch a thief wouldn’t it have tried to sneak up first?

The young man scratched at his chin stubble as he re‐evaluated his thinking.

While the pony had followed him, it was obvious that it wasn’t trying to conceal its presence. The way it was brazenly marching around looking for him implied that it wasn’t trying to get the jump on him.

If it had any ill will it was more likely that it would have snuck in, not loudly announce itself.

Probably would have brought more backup too.

Troy mused as he waited patiently by the door. Still, it had chased him through the hamlet or town or whatever. At the same time the creature hadn’t called for aid, had that been the case he would have been mobbed and detained almost immediately.

Curious.

Whatever purpose drove the equine to his neck of the woods it was unlikely that it was something pleasant. How unpleasant was irrelevant at this junction, it was better to wait it out and let it leave of its own accord.

Then he could go back to finding out if that chicken thing upstairs was edible.

Once again, the purple one returned looking rather irritated at its inability to find its prey.

Good, nobody’s home, so leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave!

Ignorant of the human’s mental rantings, the behooved home invader turned to the only place it had yet to look, the staircase leading to the towers.

NO! nononononononononono, wrong way. Shit shit shit.

His gear was still in the wardrobe! If that crazy purple freak found it, it would be certain that he was coming back and wait for him.

Shit!

He didn’t have all day for it to leave! Troy silently prayed that it would take the left stair to the closed off tower and give up, unfortunately the object of his frustration had moved out of sight and up the stairs. The right set.

“ssshdhfffffjd,” Troy bit down on a string of expletives so volatile that it would have ignited a nunnery provided it had a close enough proximity.

He debated whether or not to follow the miniature unicorn, but decided that if it ultimately found his pack his cover would be blown anyway. Not to mention his ‘little project’ was a dead giveaway, it wasn’t even hidden. Not really.

He silently made for the stairway, staying to the shadows of the support beams that held up the crumbling roof.

As he slowly made his way up the staircase, making a point to listen for any hoof falls that would indicate the presence of his current adversary.

Soon enough he was facing the ornate double doors that divided the staircase from the tower interior.

Peering past the open doorway he spied his would be pursuer, looking rather intently at the shirt he had laid over his latest kill. Troy felt a flood of panic coupled with a twinge of shame. Before, it was a simple matter of survival and understanding your surroundings and its inhabitants was one of the keys to survival. Especially when it came to understanding an enemy or a common predator. Yet now that the results of his attempts of ad‐hock biology were on the brink of being discovered, he felt like had done something dirty. It stung as the weight of his actions came into sharp relief. Civilised people don’t cut up animals, at least not sane ones.

He almost laughed in spite of himself.

Am I still sane? I don’t even know anymore.

At least he was aware of his madness, that put him ahead of most mental patients.

Still the matter at hand demanded his attention. The horse’s horn glowed purple, surrounding his cast off clothing with a similar hue.

Making the connection instantly, Troy knew what would come next; it would yank the cover off and scream. Then turn and see him, followed by either attacking or screaming some more.

So naturally he was nearly as surprised as the unicorn when the purple aura disappeared like a popped bubble.

He blinked as the pony shared his reaction of general confusion. It tried to do, whatever it was trying to do before, but each time the sparkly purple stuff fizzled out of existence. Soon the little equine stood tall with its chin up, clearly no longer fooling around. The lavender invader closed its eyes and...

...stood there with its eye’s closed.

Ok, what the fu‐

Suddenly the pony let out a small squeak of what Troy could only guess was surprise before it walked forward and picked up his cast off shirt with a hoof.

How it did so only confused the hiker even more. Though he flinched at the now exposed carcass that lay upon the desk.

Oddly enough, the pony was paying more heed to his laundry than the butchered corpse it had been previously used to cover. Which was quite a feat, as corpses tend to grab one's attention.

After flipping the cloth over in its hoof‐

How?

The four legged investigator seemed to address the old thing with a growing look of reverence.

Troy squinted in confusion, he didn’t exactly walk around wearing the Shroud of Turin if the grease and blood stains were any indication.

Troy took a few careful steps into the room, rolling his heels to quiet his foot falls. His uninvited guest was facing the desk and he could plainly see its face, and it could see him if it looked away for even a second. Troy circled around until he was out of its line of sight. Relaxing slightly he considered his next course of action.

Ok, so how do I get this things attention?

He blinked.

That was actually a good question. Should he wait for it to turn around on its own? Should he utilize the ever prevalent Polite Cough?

What was the proper way to get the attention of a completely foreign species that may or may not want to kill/imprison you?

This question would go unanswered as the attention attracting properties of the cadaver on the desk worked its own brand of magic. While not as effective as actual magic, it certainly didn’t exactly hurt that it was eye level, at least where the quadruped was concerned.

It did a double take, before seemingly rooting herself in place for a solid minute. Though it slowly seemed to come back to reality as it began to step away from the desk. Until it was rapidly backpedaling away from the grisly scene.

Right into Troy’s legs.

He froze, in anticipation for whatever would follow. Surprisingly enough, it didn’t occur to the critter currently nestling its rump between his legs that something was out of place.

After a moment, the purple pony suddenly seemed to understand that it had backed into an unknown object, and turned to identify the obstruction. Troy watched with muted amusement as its expression turned from confusion to abject terror, as its gaze traveled up from his legs, across his torso until their eyes locked. The second they made eye contact, the freakishly large eyes contracted to pin pricks and its ears fell flat.

It gave a small series of whinnies, but otherwise remained silent.

The two of them stood there like that, Troy standing tall with his arms crossed with the equine warming his shins. After a second the tiny horse blinked and removed its posterior with what could only be described as a sheepish look and... it was blushing?

How do you even... No, screw it. Don’t care anymore.

While the sudden movement had been a bit startling they were soon back in familiar territory, awkward silence.

“Uh, hi.”

Troy mentally winced at his lame attempt at an icebreaker, accompanied by a short stiff wave. To his astonishment the overgrown muppet returned the gesture.

“Sooooo, stupid question here. Can you understand what I’m saying or is that unreasonably optimistic?”

His efforts were received with nothing but a cocked head and confused expression.

“Thought so, just checking.”

The hiker soon began the same procedure of identifying himself by name as he had done with the smaller ponies, complete with chest pounding and finger pointing. After a few exaggerated arm sweeps in its direction the equine realized it was the cue to introduce itself.

Herself.

The young man mentally corrected. It didn’t really feel right referring to her as an it, and he had gotten a rather obvious hint to her gender a moment ago. He felt his face warm a little at that thought, but manually returned his focus to the mare.

He raised an eye when she seemed to clear her throat and take a deep breath before rattling off a ridiculously long number of syllables. After she was done she looked up and beamed a brilliant smile in his direction.

Troy just blinked before giving the only response he could think of in the time frame available.

“What?”

The lavender mare’s smile dropped before she smacked herself in the face in a fashion that struck the hiker as very reminiscent of the facepalm. Though he suspected it hurt quite a bit more given the whole hoof factor. He was honestly surprised by the range of motion the equine appeared to have with its front legs, they had to have ball socket joints in the shoulder. Another rather eerie parallel to human anatomy.

First the enlarged brain, now socket joints. What else do we have in common?

Before he could ponder that mystery any further the purple one was gearing up for second attempt. Going through the whole wind‐up with the clearing of the throat and everything, she let out another cascade of gibberish, though this time much more manageable.

Troy began his attempt to replicate it before he was interrupted by the purple pony who was waving her front legs and shaking her head.

He was wondering if he had accidentally insulted his ‘guest’ by mispronouncing her name, but apparently that wasn’t the case as she repeated the last part, making sure to put a lot of emphasis on it.

Troy returned to butchering the new language that these beings spoke as he sort of managed to get her name recognizable at least. If one strained the definition of ‘recognizable’, but the pony counted it as a success if the way she was smiling was any way to judge.

If that last bit was her name then what was all that other crap? She some kind of noble or was that just some kind of formal introduction?

Once again, awkward silence settled in like it was renting the room.

The two could only stand there desperately trying to conjure up a form of communication that they could both understand.

Suddenly the pony’s face lit up with a smile.

Troy unconsciously moved a step back, it was unnerving how this horse could suddenly seem so human. He was roused from thoughts as his new acquaintance's horn began to glow. Troy, not knowing what to expect, shifted to a lower stance and rested his hand on the hilt of his knife. He didn’t know what the small unicorn was doing, but it never hurt to be cautious.

Though it would appear that his caution was unwarranted as a small figurine appeared to jump out of the pony’s horn. Then another. And then another.

Troy had to admit out of all the things he had expected to happen, this was not one of them.

Still, now that he thought about it, a unicorn giving him a most impressive display that would put any puppeteer to shame wasn’t the worst thing to happen to him. One of the stranger instances granted, but not unpleasantly so, which is a nice change of pace. No risk of disembowelment whatsoever. Wait a second...

...I know those colors.

The three little figurines had the exact same coloration of the fillies that had stayed the night a while back. Was that the reason she came out all this way? She hadn’t tried to hide her presence, so maybe he was in the clear.

After a few more purple flashes there were replicas of the wooden wolves he had faced and the fillies were in a small tree, guarded by a little figurine of Troy. Seeing himself as an animated doll was a little surreal, but if anything that would describe his last two days perfectly.

Surreal.

The tiny (and somewhat adorable) timberwolves attacked and one cartoonish fight scene later, Troy’s avatar stood triumphant, striking a pose with one foot on top of the head of a fallen enemy.

Once the scene was finished the pony pointed to the enchanted figurine then to Troy and back again before tilting her head quizzically.

Not wanting to keep his guest waiting, the wayward hiker pointed to himself and nodded his head. Hoping against hope that his gestures would cross the verbal boundary he now faced. The expressions that these ponies had were strikingly similar to human ones, perhaps this was the same?

Judging by the smile plastered on the pony’s face he felt it was safe to assume so for now. Crouching, he began to examine the tiny stringless marionettes that continued to skitter around on the floor. They were difficult to describe, they almost looked like they were made of glass. He reached out to feel one, and suddenly it felt like he had managed to stick his entire hand in an electrical socket.

He cried out in pain and reeled backwards, only to realize that there wasn’t any support underneath his foot.

Oh, right. The balcony.

On mostly instinct he grabbed at the ledge of the tower. Before he had any time to process his suddenly precarious situation, one of the bricks not used to bearing so much torque, came loose, leaving Troy to dangle by a single arm.

As he struggled to regain his grip on the tower, the purple pony rushed to him and reached out a hoof which Troy accepted with rabid appreciation. Though he was still struggling to pull himself back into the tower.

He became suddenly aware of a light tugging under his armpits, like someone was trying to lift him up. Turning his head he could see a cyan blue pegasus trying to help, though judging by the way the wings were erratically flapping, the winged pony was having trouble. Still, he was close to being able to lever himself back into the castle tower, he just needed a little more...

At this moment the cobblestone that had been serving as Troy’s handhold decided it had spent too long cemented in one place and promptly detached from the tower. Which seemed to be a popular notion amongst the local rock population, as most of the bricks from what had used to be the balcony area quickly follow suit. Sending the purple mare over the edge with the human.

Soon, Troy and the mare were plummeting towards the ground while the blue pegasus still valiantly tried to halt their descent, though with little result. Troy barely had time to register the feeling of the purple pony wrenching its hoof out of his grasp before he was blinded by a sudden flash of light. Looking around he confirmed that both the mare was gone and the ground was still rushing to meet him and say hi.

He heard some shouting and a loud explosion followed by a heavy sounding slam, it also felt like the pegasus was pulling him to the side. Of course he was aware of this in a similar fashion to how someone in a hurricane is aware that their hat had gone missing. Ultimately the hiker turned unintentional base jumper was long past the point of caring. He closed his eyes to enjoy watching his life flash before his eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Falling doesn’t kill you, it’s that sudden bit at the end where you stop falling that does the trick.”

—Himalayan proverb (paraphrased)

AN: I can almost hear my editor frothing at the mouth from here, only gave him enough time for one round of edits. I got almost everything in order with my prereaders so I thought I could push this out the door a little early. If we missed any error bunnies you guys tend pick them out right quick. You've waited long enough.

Till next time, I think my editor is trying to strangle me through my computer screen.

And yes. Another cliffhanger. Sorry, it was this or update next month.