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Part Two
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* * *
Shipping Sickness
or, Twilight Sparkle Gets Intimate With Her Table, Part Two
Jeffrey C. Wells
* * *
Somewhere below, in the common room, a weary and inexplicably Failsafe spell-resistant drum kit looked up in the direction of the library loft.
"Ba dum pum," it said to itself. "Tish."
the end
Comments ( 168 )
Okay, commence DAFUQing, but before you do, let me just say a quick word of thanks to S.R. Foxley for the beta on this one. Given the actual end product, you may not believe this, but his influence markedly improved the final piece.
PFFFFT. Gonna need help. Think I got a concussion from a truly epic face palm.
I am so very impressed.
Ow, the puns! ![]()
Excellent example of well-done random humor, and punnery. And yes... that last line was a punch right into my sense of humor. ![]()
Okay, why in the hay does this have 2 parts? Coudln't this have been wrapped up in one? You gave me false hope you monster! ![]()
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There is something seriously wrong with you... And unfortunately, it's probably contagious, because I did laugh surprisingly hard.
Absolutely wonderful! I haven't genuinely laughed at something like that in so long! ![]()
Oh good. Even if the Failsafe had worked, the drum kit probably would've spontaneously reanimated just to get in that last rimshot.
...Infinite slowclaps.
That was fantastic. Puns, puns everywhere! And the characters were amazingly funny!
You know how you know comedy is perfect? When the non-funny parts are good, too. I loved your statements on shipping, on romance, and on relationships. It was easy to forget, for a moment, that the lovestruck paramour of Twilight was a nightstand.
Oh, and that drumset was amazing. Perfect delivery. ![]()
congrats, you've beaten the final level of fimfiction
please take this badge and complimentary mimosa
That is by far one of the best puns I have ever seen. The buildup is probably what made it.
Oh, you. ![]()
Even with the terrible puns, this was actually a very enjoyable story. Not a bad way to waste a few minutes. ![]()
I have to say that the entire story to set up that ONE line was probably the best thing I have read in a long while. I envy your skill!
Much DAFUQing was done, and I loved every moment of it. All that for one pun. ONE PUN!
By far one of the best short stories I've read in a while
crazy just for the sake of being crazy. No over exuberant randomness for the sake of randomness, no pinkie pie bending the laws of physics, just Twilight having one of her epic level mental breakdowns.
Arrrrgh!!! Keep firing!! Direct hit, Captain! She's goin down!
Ferdinand Feghoot would be proud.
The puns were terrible, and terribly well placed.
As for the sadness of losing Nightstand... well, she can always re-cast it on just Nightstand, right?
And maybe a transmogrification spell?
After all, if you're determined enough, she could easily make it work...
So.
Beautifully.
Puntastic.
I admit that I gigglegroaned when I read the last line...
I kept expecting Chairilee to show up and give her a lecture.
And where was Nightlight's #1 assistant, Spork, forever longing after their mutual friend, the beautiful and elegant Vanity?
Puns....furniture puns. I don't usually laugh out loud when I read a story, but when I do, it's because it has furniture puns....Brilliant I say. And dat
ending....
Sweet princess Celestia, I think I have been serously overpunned. And I mean that in a good way ![]()
Totally enjoyed reading this. Bravo!
Bravo, Skywriter! The edits you made really pull this together and make it pop, eh! ![]()
The two princesses walked in. Or, at least, a radiant white princess and some giant rust-red ball of fur wearing Luna's crown. Here it was: the lecture.
"Celestia! I'm so sorry," Twilight cringed. "And ... er ..." She stared at the four-legged dust trap. "What is that, I don't even."
A canine muzzle peeked through the layers of thick fur. "We are not amused, Twilight Sparkle."
Celestia's helpful attempt to look stern wasn't even in the same room as sincere.
"Okay ... perhaps with the benefit of hindsight we shall find this amusing," Luna allowed.
"But you still ought to be more careful," Celestia added, finally managing a mild maternalism.
"Or at least target her next time," Luna muttered under her breath.
"Wait, what do you mean? Did I do that?" Twilight cast frantically through her memory. There were the wards, and the Bring-To-Life spells ... but to turn Luna into some sort of ... wolf-thing ...?
Celestia coughed and discreetly hornpointed at the lush, imported sofa Twilight had animated the previous night. There, draped over the arm, was the Easily Forgettable Pun-Based Magical Feedback Device that Celestia had predictably forgotten after her visit last week.*
"Oh." Twilight gave the princesses her best sheepish look. That explained it.
Wait. No it didn't. "Er ... I don't get it. Why is Luna a shaggy dog?"
Luna sighed and shook her head, then removed the feedback device from the Irish settee.
* Only eight bits! Available now from MacGuffin industries.
The story is so amazing!
Haven't read that many puns in one story ever before! This deserves all of the applauses. ![]()
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Good god, that is the single most amazing thing I have ever written. Screw sandwiches, this is my new bible!
...
Or something to that effect.
...Uhh...
<Insert wacky and entertaining pun here>
And this my little ponys is how you write "Random".
Truly a masterpiece for the ages, and the comments were close by.
That was hilariously stupid, and sadly, extremely in character
Well done, you magnificent bastard.
Interesting to say the least. Check out my almost 300k word story for some inspiration to write another story
I think you broke my head in some inexplicable way. Although, I lost it starting with Princess Sofa.
I haven't said yet but you really cracked me up. I loved every pun. THEY WERE FUNNY NOT FACEPALMY!!!
And that second chapter!!! just PERFECT!!
I'm watching you, if you write half as good as you pun, you are worth following!
Wonderful, now thats what I call a damn good read :) On my list of favourites! ![]()
I so wish this was rated Mature, this could have been so much more dafuq.
I can always dream. ![]()
Words cannot describe my emotions after reading this. This emote, however comes the closest. ![]()
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it was good just really surreal
but i guess that to be expected when u have inanimate objects have emotions and then being reciprocated
I swear, if i have a concussion from how hard I just face palmed, your paying the medical bills you literary genius.
Before reading: "Twilight Sparkle flagrantly abuses her Come-To-Life spell, and learns a little bit about love in the process."
Meh.
"Also, puns. "
Suddenly, it's on my 'Read Later' list.







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