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(Image by Ben) "Metal Gear has fallen into the hooves of an Equestrian revolutionary, who, with the backing of his human mercenary allies, intends to use it to depose Celestia and crown himself ruler. Now, the legendary Solid Snake must ally with the residents of Ponyville to prevent this monster from unleashing a nuclear catastrophe."
>>1429 I think that's the truest thing that anybody could possibly have said about this fanfic.
Honestly, folks, I didn't think I'd ever write a story like this in my life. Confound those ponies; they've bewitched me with their magical friendship. 
>>1427 I'm just as interested in seeing where this goes as you are. It's been a long while since I've written a full-length fanfic. I want to see if I've still got it in me.
Oh wow, nice action sequence with that manticore there! 
Considering Snake's kinda passed out on the ground and the only person that's around I can kinda picture where this is probably gonna go. I kinda with Applebloom found someone other than AJ first, but seeing as I don't see any other way Snake's getting out of this one I really hope she actually stops to listen to her. I mean, I don't think she'd take a chance with something like this but she's definitely not in the best of moods.
Whew, finally released this next chapter! I've been trying to follow this story deeply, but you just don't upload these often enough.
Anywho, I enjoyed this chapter more than the other two combined; AJ earned my respect back and Snake is acting like twice the badass he was in the other two chapters. I am truly waiting for more.
Oh... my... Amazing! 18,000 words, and let me tell you even though the wait was pretty big the pay off was more than enough! I mean, that was just awesome!
I'm a little bit tired at the moment, so I can't really give you an in-depth breakdown on what I enjoyed about the story, but the memoir style is really working well here.
Expect another, more detailed review in a day or two. Till then, it was a good read!
I almost made this a blog entry, but apparently, nobody uses the blog feature on here. So it's a comment instead!
First off, thanks to everybody for commenting. But it would behoove me to inform you all that I have a grave condition, wherein if I do not get enough quality feedback on my writing, I start to grow big-headed and consider myself the pinnacle of literary technique. In other words, I will become Stephenie Meyer if I don't get more criticism.
So have at it, folks! While I do enjoy a good "HOMIGAWD, POSHY, YOU'RE THE BEST PERSON TO EVER LIVE, AND I WANT YOU TO IMPREGNATE ME WITH YOUR PONY-WRITING SEED. HUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGEEEEEEEEER!!!" comment as much as the next talentless hack writer, the truth is, I'd much rather get a critical analysis of how I'm doing, what I'm doing write, and what I could be doing better. And if I don't, well, then I'll suddenly gain thirty dozen pounds and develop an affinity for the word "chagrin."
Please. Think of the children.
Next up, some changes that absolutely nobody requested!
1. I'm going to take a page from Fallout: Equestria's book and start adding relevant quotes at the beginning of each chapter from here on out. It's sort of my way of paying homage (hurr durr) to one of the greats, in addition to it being a really good idea that I wish I had come up with. 
I realize that the line between tribute and plagiarism is a thin one, which is why I was so hesitant to do it for so long (I've had it in my head to do that for a while, to be honest), but I reason that it's such a little thing. A stylistic choice that I want to emulate, not a storytelling element, plot device, line of dialogue, or what have you. I'm still on the proper side of that line. I hope. If Kkat shows up at my house in the middle of the night, I'll know that I've done a bad thing. And then, the penance will begin.
2. I altered the title of the second chapter. Fans of Metal Gear Solid may have noticed that the last two chapters have been named after music from the series' soundtrack. That was a convention that I came up with during chapter three, and it's one that I want to stick to for the rest of the serie...er...story.
(can't let on that i'm planning to write more of these things. no siree, that would be awful. fortunately, no one will ever read this comment, nor my passive-aggressive attempts at making people reading this comment. posh, you are a genius.)
And since I was never very fond of the second chapter's title (It just came to mind. I really should have put more thought into it), I decided "well shoot, why not?" So there you go.
3. Based on some feedback I've gotten over on Equestria: Daily, I'm going to make some minor adjustments to chapter four. I won't alter the content radically, don't worry, but there was one bit of criticism that I agreed wholeheartedly with, and I want to tweak the chapter accordingly. Basically, someone suggested that Snake's resolve to rescue Applebloom came too far out of left field. My intent was to reflect his resolve to rescue Meryl in MGS1, but because I'm a silly silly person, I didn't write that into the chapter as clearly as I should have. So I'm going to do that.
4. I will also start writing little blog entries about the writing process behind each chapter. There may or may not be interesting information or amusing anecdotes in each, but you won't know until you read, will you? So you'd better read them all, just in case. 
Thanks to all three of my readers, and we'll see you again sometime before the end of the universe with the fifth chapter, wherein absolutely nothing sexual is going to happen.
I'm serious. Snake is not going to have sex with a pony.
He isn't!
If you're waiting for that to happen, then go away, because that is not going to happen. I cannot stress this enough. There will be no bestiality in this story. Ever.
(otacon would get jealous)
While I havent played all of the games in this awsome game series, I have played enough to know what is going on and I must say, this is SO AWESOME! 
I hope to see more of all the characters because you do what makes the show so good, engaging characters. (while of course not yours are still in character)
>>62651 Gah! Why did you have to put that image in my head you nazi basterd!?
GAAAAAAH..... Bad image.....
Besides, Snake is sterile. As far as I know, Solid Snake died a virgin.
Only Big Boss got any booty with Big Mama. As for constructive criticism.... I got nothing. You nailed everything right on.
Posh:
I myself am working on an MGS based-reference on a huge project I am working on. Being a fan of the series and FIM, I encourage you to keep at it. At the moment, I can't find anything to nit-pick about, because it's obvious you have put effort into it. Please keep at it; many of us wish we could write like this.
Thanks for this delivery. It's tied up with JasonTheHuman's "Anthropology" for the ones I await updates for.
>>180651 "Pony Gear Solid: In Which Solid Snake Punches a Manticore in the Face and Dismembers a Timberwolf, then Bludgeons It to Death With Its Own Leg."
>>180731 Big Boss was the leader of two (technically three) mercenary armies during the course of the Metal Gear saga. First he was the head of Militaires Sans Frontiers, the private army that featured in Peace Walker. This army eventually became Outer Heaven, the mercenary nation that Big Boss ruled. They revolted in 1995, and Solid Snake defeated them; this was the story for the original Metal Gear.
After that, Big Boss (who had survived the downfall of Outer Heaven) set out to establish a new mercenary nation: Zanzibar Land, which Solid Snake was forced to infiltrate and destroy on Christmas of 1999. This is the nation from which Pegasus Wings' initial membership was drawn.
Does that clear things up?
I do wonder how the gang would react to nuclear ordnance... actually, I don't exactly 'wonder'. I plan on getting that in my own Red Alert x-over at some point. Still, interesting to see how you go with that.
I'm not all that familiar with the Metal Gear series beyond some very basic knowledge: are the ICBMs on a Metal Gear unitary warhead or MIRVed?
The only MGS game I own is The Twin Snakes (I know the plots of MG1 and 2 though), so I'm not exactly in the know in regards to all the mythology of the games, but this is great. Not very many people can turn a one-scene character into such a well developed person with motives and vices, but you did it magnificently. The action and humor, rape part aside, were very good. Snatching Snake's cigarette from his mouth is something Twilight would do. I also got a real kick out of "He's a fucking chickenshit retard." You know your New Yorkers. 
Unitary, though I suppose a MIRV would be scarier. I was actually just thinking about changing it to a MIRV, but I've planned the story with a unitary missile in mind. A MIRV would alter the story's scenario too much.
EDIT: I just realized that the warhead in Peace Walker was a MIRV. So I guess my answer would be that it varies between incarnations of Metal Gear. I know that Metal Gear REX's warheads were unitary, as well as unique (stealth warheads fired by a railgun, invisible to radar).
>>181452 Ah, the wolf wasn't really going to rape Twilight. The rape subtext was just Twilight's overactive imagination torturing her. It was going to devour her alive, that's all. :)
inkie Pie and Rainbow Dash erupted into full-blown belly laughs. Rainbow Dash sank to the ground and plopped onto her bottom behind Pinkie, the two leaning back-to-back as they roared with joy. Snake flushed and clenched his jaw. “Because 'Pinkie Pie' sounds so much better,” he grumbled.
“Girls,” said Twilight flatly. “Seriously? Are you four?”
With a mighty effort, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash forcibly repressed their laughter into less raucous (but still mirthful) chuckles. “Okay,” gasped Pinkie, in between bursts, “okay, you're right. I'm done. We're done” She grinned, giggled one last time, coughed, and grinned again, looking at Rainbow Dash. “Done?”
“Done,” agreed Rainbow Dash, returning Pinkie's grin.
Snake folded his arms. “You're crocked, aren't you?” he asked.
wow really? you made them go for such a gutter joke? i facepalm and laugh at this pun.
Love this story, also have been a fan of the MGS games, man just got the MGS HD collection on Xbox 360 when I still have 2 and 3 on PS2 and Peace Walker on PSP, but who cares it's in HD, anyway, once again Love this story 
keep up the good work, my fellow MGS Fan.
Two nitpicky things about this chapter: Ditzy Doo's name should probably be changed to Derpy Hooves, since that was later established as her canon name. Also the sentence "I wonder how much of the blame Zecora shoulders for what befell Equestria." would sound better as "I wonder how much of the blame rests on Zecora's shoulders for what befell Equestria."
Good call on that second line, thank you.
As for Derpy/Ditzy, this chapter was written well in advance of Last Roundup, so I think there's a grandfather clause that applies to pre-canonized-Derpy stories. I asked the readers on Equestria Daily what they thought, and they suggested that I stick with Ditzy. I think I'll have Rainbow Dash refer to her as "Derpy" in the future, and write it off as a mean nickname.
Yeah, I should have guessed you had already addressed that at some point. Personally, I'd still retcon it, but I suppose your plan works too.
Anyway, I am overall enjoying this story so far. You've done a good job staying true to the two universes, despite their wildly different tones (Snake seems a little bit OOC, but I think that's largely because he's involved in more conversing that I'm used to). You also have some interesting villains in place and I look forward to seeing how our heroes will progress, so keep up the good work.
>>309815 Ah... they say never to explain the joke. So I can neither confirm nor deny. Take that however you will.
I'm glad you liked the rewrite, and that I'm not the only person who did. I've yet to alter the version on Equestria Daily to match.
Some days, I truly wonder why I created two separate versions of the story. Bad decision-making on my part.
>>311026 Technically, yes. But the differences between versions boil down to gameplay additions and special features, like the casting theater and VR in MGS2: Substance, or the 3D camera in MGS3: Subsistence. The exception is The Twin Snakes, but even then, it follows the same story as the original to a T, just with wacky cutscenes and mediocre voice acting.
The problem with having two different versions is keeping them in canon with one another. Any change to one, no matter how minor, needs to be applied to the other for the sake of continuity between versions. I think the Equestria Daily version is the one that most are familiar with, but the FIMfiction one is more accessible and malleable. So, in the future, I'll limit the story to FIMFiction, and provide Equestria Daily with links to the chapters here, rather than creating a separate Google doc.
>>313890 Paul Eiding? Is that you?
Some of the performances were good, but many more just sounded bored and phoned in. Jennifer Hale and Paul Eiding in particular sounded like they couldn't be bothered to try. The only ones who matched their performances from the original were Debi Mae West as Meryl, and Cam Clarke as Liquid. David Hayter surpassed his.
Changing Gray Fox's voice actor was a surprising move, but not an unwelcome one.
[SPOILERS]
Thanks for correction of the timberwolves fight scene.
I really hate Twilight presented as a monster, who is smashing a dead body into pieces. The wolf was already dead, but SHE WASN'T DONE YET?! Our dear Twi? :( I don't want to insult you, but that was the craziest shit... it really hurts... I hope that you see how far you've gone. Too far.
Fortunately, you've made a new version of this scene - PERFECT WORK! And you've even changed Fluttershy speech to alpha wolf - 10 times better. It was just what Fluttershy would really do.
Oh and there's one addition. I wanted to check the end of this corrected chapter. And what i am receiving? THE BEAUTIFUL REFERENCE TO SNIPER WOLF'S DEATH!!! YOU - ARE - AWESOME!!!
BTW don't waste your time and update the version at equestriadaily.com!
Years of practice and wanting a paycheck I suppose.
Any word on how long till the next chapter? It's the latter end of the spring semester in a lot of American universities, and since so many of this fanbase is about college age I don't have any expectations until summer, what with the other fics he writes and all, but one can dream, I suppose.
>>396991 I have a completed draft of the next chapter which I've shipped off to the bestest most awesome pre-reader in the world. Depending on his feedback, I'll re-write what's necessary, painstakingly edit and proofread it, and publish it. How long before it's posted depends on how much back I am fed.
I'm getting all the problems hammered out before it's posted, not after. I don't want to make the same mistake I did with the last chapter.
Wow, this chapter was so awesome. There's kind of a good deal of small typos, though, to be honest, but the story itself played out beautifully. I loved when Twilight cracked the rifle across the sniper's head. ^^
Also: I stooped to retrieve the box she'd dropped, walked over to her, and offered it. "Believe it or not, a cardboard box is indispensable on a sneaking mission," I said. "I can't even begin to list the number of agents whose lives were saved by a handy cardboard box." That is the best MGS2 reference you could've made. 
>>421867 Error on my part. I started out with Norbert, which somehow became Nigel in my head. When I went back and re-read the chapter, I decided to transform the earlier instances of Norbert to Nigel. If you want to read it as Nigel Thornberry working for Pegasus Wings, you're welcome to.
>>420570 Agh, typos. I'm always so careful, but I always miss a couple. Any specific ones that stand out to you?
Ok Back home:
The soldier shook his head rapidly. "No! No! I mean, Norbert wanted to, but I stopped him! I-in fact, I tried to help her! I brought her food, and tried to get her to talk to me, and - "
Just a crazed man named Norbert, and at that point, I didn't doubt the ponies' abilities against Pegasus Wings.
That was excellent, well worth the wait. I kind of like the way that the whole ending was essentially a building spiral of tension, reduction, more tension, partial reduction, and ended with the gun thing. That's an excellent climax to that building cycle, and oddly enough it meshed well with the music I was listening to at the time, which overall has nothing to do mood wise with MLP, this fiction, or MGS. I look forward to more of the pony perspective grappling with the inherent violence of this job they's waltzed into. Also the Sorrow. That too.
Still loving this story and waiting eagerly for the next chapter... just have to wonder if Dash, Twilight, Pinkie, and/or Spike thought to bring their black 'sneaking suits' from Read It And Weep and It's About Time.
Actually, I'd love to see Snake's reaction to the complete 'Future Twilight' look.
>>557945 I'm pretty sure that Pinkie can manifest matter at will, but Twi and Spike are different stories. Speaking of, I have considered a gag involving Pinkie Pie and a sneaking suit get-up, but that won't happen for a while, I don't think.
I have been working on the new chapter and am making headway on it, so don't worry. It's a-comin'.
>>922298 of course
although you could strap a Davie Crockett on them or something probably the perfect pltaform for TDM
also this is how I picture Commander Cain
close or not close>>922427 Yes well Commander
of Wing hard not to see the original Cain.You cannot convince me other wise my profile pic is Twidarma all arguments are invalid
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(best pony): "Don't you dare say the 'T' word!"
for this story, though. I'm excited for the next chapter. ^^
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