• Member Since 16th Mar, 2019
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago

Lucar


A French brony who loves to read and write. My English is not perfect, but I will do my best!

Sequels1

T

Sweetie Belle just wanted to ask Twilight to help her get better in magic. Too bad she didn't choose a good time... One magical accident later, and she is now in a throne room in an unknown castle. Hopefully, the fat penguin on the throne will help her return to her home. Seeing his expression, it's not looking good...

Ooh boy...


Currently being rewritten. Number of chapters rewritten: 43/123
Starts around the first half of season 5.
Kirby Right Back At Ya canon will not be used.
I don't possess anything that appears in this story. Kirby belongs to HAL Laboratory and Nintendo, and My Little Pony belongs to Hasbro.
Cover from NecroHorse

Chapters (123)
Comments ( 2278 )

9515029
:raritywink: Of course he will comes. This story will go all the way from Nightmare to Star Allies, and this includ Super Star (Ultra). However, no Marx Soul, because he is not canon, like all the other soul bosses excepted Drawcia. But I warn you, because we are from Sweetie's POV, there is a few games in which we will not follow Kirby's adventure, or only partially.

9515512
...maybe marx can be the royal jester...he seems the type.

i bet sweeties main attack would be giant music notes.

9516598
They will have to feed him first. :rainbowlaugh:

9517269
I wouldn't say "main attack", but it's a good idea once she will have developped her magic. First, she still need to learn how to shoot magical lasers, so it will take some time.

I hope Sweetie Belle becomes an alicorn, if she doesn’t return home.

9520168
It's actually where I'm not sure. Is it right to make Sweetie Belle an alicorn while her friends remain an earth pony and a pegasus ? I know I can make her an alicorn, I have the when and the how in my head. But will I do it ? I don't know.

9520255

It depends. You could have the dynamic between Sweetie and Dedede be similar to Twilight and Celestia. However, while Celestia is gentle and values good character, Dedede could value work ethic instead. This could tie into Sweetie not being that good at magic, as, instead of being gifted with it, she’d have to work for it instead.

As for Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, I’m not sure. If this takes place before they get their cutie marks, then you could have Sweetie Belle’s be in magic. You could make Sweetie Belle reside in Dreamland for an extended amount of time, up until she has the power to return. (Aka becoming an alicorn.)

Even then, these are just ideas that I got while brainstorming. It’s ultimately up to you to decide where you want the story to go. Keep up the good work! :twilightsmile:

Kirby is going to eat Sweetie Bell and have the power of bad cooking :rainbowlaugh:

9520300
Yes, this takes place before they get their Cutie Marks, a little after the start of season 5, whence the alternate universe tag.

Your first paragraph resumes pretty much the whole idea of the story. Sweetie kinda becomes Dedede's protégée, and is trained to become the best of the best in Popstar in the hope she eventually beats Kirby with the help of her magic, while trying to get home. Of course, the various adventures she will live alongside Popstar's heroes will help.

As for Sweetie Belle's mark, it will not be in magic. It's all that I will say :raritywink: Same thing for if she comes back in Equestria or remains in Dreamland. So sadly, I can't confirm anything about the whole alicorn thing, just that it may happens if I think that it's a good idea to transform her.

9520309
What an horrible power, killing enemies by food poisoning... :pinkiesick: Those poor Waddle Dees don't deserve it.

Holy moly, I wasn’t expecting this fanfic to be this good, so far you have done a fantastic job, keep it up!

Also, for what I have red in the comments, you might have the idea of turning Sweetie Belle in an Alicorn at the end of the story. Listen I don’t what to influence the direction of the story –for my an author must write his/her story as she/he wants- but that will be F***ing amassing, and in some way, the most logical outcome, I mean if Sweetie is going to help defeat at least half of the war-monger-universe-conquerors/destroyers-demons that Kirby has fight against, the least thing that she can get as a compensation are wings (in the other hand, Kirby only gets free cake and only half of the time-, so who knows).

I also thing it will make for an spectacular sequel –or at least a good epilogue- seen how having wings but not cutie mark affected Sweetie relations with the CMC and every character in general (It will be fun to see Twi go nuts trying to understand how that’s possible) hell you can even connect Equestria and pop star at the end, it will be nice to see how this worlds and characters interact with each other.

Anyway, I better finish my nonsense, and like I said before you are doing a wonderful work, keep it up

9520553

Sweetie Bell transform into...

Sweet Puff Bell Boll

(It’s just Sweetie Bell turning into another Kirby)

9520599
Wow ! Thanks ! Because this is my first fic in English, I wasn't sure if I would be able to write it right. I already have more or less the ending in my head, as well as most of the major events of the story, but I'm not against advices or ideas if it can help getting the story better.

And maybe lyrics for potential futur songs that Sweetie Belle may sing in the futur. Especially with Dedede and Meta Knight's themes, and the robobot armor theme (yes, she will be in a robobot armor, and it will be awesome). Let's just say... that her singing talent will be put into use. :moustache:


9520606
The worst is that I found images of Kirby version of My Little Pony characters while searching for an image cover. If Kirby ever end up eating Sweetie Belle to copie her power, this may give some inspiration for the design.

I don’t like Kirby, or characters that play hero in general. Great story!

9522877
Then I hope the following will not bother you. I mean, with Sweetie Belle following Kirby in some of his adventures, fighting bad guys, and all. It's kinda the whole essence of Kirby. She will not be as hot head as Kirby, if it can reassure you.

9523197
Nono ! You where not rude. I'm just not sure I really understood your message. You told that you don't like characters playing heroes, and I warned you that it may happens with Sweetie Belle in the futur, but that she will not charge blindly like Kirby unless she has no choice. I just wanted to make sure you would understand what come next, just in case. :twilightsmile:

9523218
Oh, ok! I just thought what I said was rude. Thanks for telling! Though, will Sweetie practice spells that originated in Dreamland? Fantasy worlds are awesome. :twilightsheepish:

9523277
You have no idea. Let's just say... she will take some heavy inspiration from the bosses, especialy at the very end.:pinkiecrazy:

"I know. And yet, he -We are sure that he is a 'he'- was able to beat king Dedede. They fought in this same boxing ring, and at the end of their fight, Kirby was able to send king Dedede flying through the roof ! He also beat by himself a great part of our army, including some of the king's strongest lieutenants. Since then, king Dedede is training really hard in the hope of beating him."

so your saying he “NEEDS A MONSTER TO CLOBER THA DARE KIRBY!”

9523400
And this monster is a cute filly ! :pinkiecrazy:

I like the little mix for the battles. Can’t wait to see more and hopefully more Kirby kisses :rainbowwild:

Shocked, she doesn't have time to say anything before she feels the bottle's liquid enter her mouth, healing her. Once done, Kirby separates their mouths, leaving Sweetie Belle as red as a Waddle Doo. Kirby tilts his head at her reaction. Rick too.

lol not sure how I feel about this :rainbowlaugh:

9523950
and its free. no need to call N.M.E! unless they start selling sweetie belle’s in that case I’LL TAKE 100!

9524685
Well, Kirby is a child too, and in the anime, he is even a baby. So, uh... I don't know. :rainbowlaugh:
9525008
Me too ! :pinkiecrazy: Well, I would need the money first...

:fluttershysad: Poor Sweetie... Did they at least grab the fish for dinner?

9528243
The fish being too big, having nothing to cut it, and Sweetie needing comfort, Kirby decided that he could forget the fish.

9528391
You caught my attention. I'mah read

Please tell me this story will be as adorable as I'm expecting it to be.

9528949
Well, take Nintendo's most adorable saga (alongside the Yoshis), add in the most adorable of fillies, and yes, this give a story that is so sweet that you will have diabetus in 10 seconds flat. But this is still Dreamland, where abominations run rampant every now and then, so don't expect the cuteness to be present when it's time to kick ass. :rainbowdetermined2:

:rainbowderp: What have you done? You shattered all cross over references that below up in Epic conclusion...

So far it’s nice, though I do feel like the story feels bit to straight forward on the actions the characters are doing as well for each room. But it’s getting better

9534405
Yeah, I see what you mean. I hope getting better at this with the following games, starting with Super Star. The fact that the games will give more details in the levels should help. This should get more interresting in the games where the group of heroes is composed of characters that can actually talk, like in Kirby 64, or that are more crazy like in Canvas Curse where I will have to go wild.

At least in the fights, I can give some spectacle.

ah yes running and eating they go together very well... in kirby games not real life...tired it once....wasn’t pleasant.

9536304
bet dedede’s gonna learn that the hard way.

9536402
What would be the point of the Gourmet Races if it's to get sick ? :applejackunsure: Like you said, it's Dreamland, and it has already been said in this story time and time again that Dreamland is a crazy place. Being able to eat while running seems to be one of thoses crazy things, or Dedede has an iron stomach. In a world where food just pop in the wild, the two are possible.

Still, it would be funny to see. :rainbowlaugh:

9536825
hope dedede doesn’t have a heart attack....hes been trough so much.

9537054
Pfff. He is too awesome to die from an heart attack.

It’s called Fantasy and imagination Twilight, it doesn’t need to be explain :rainbowderp:

Great chapter, is nice to see that they are trying to get her back

By the way you forget to add this link:

9537973

By the way you forged to add this link

I hope I haven't done anything bad. Sometime, I see stories adding links to songs to accompany some scenes, and I wanted to do the same thing.

"It would be hard not to trust each other after something like that." He then go beside Rarity's ear and whisper to her. "I ship them."

because discord said it, it has a chance to happen... im interested either way

9538545
It may, or it may not. :trollestia:

9538469

No you haven’t done anything wrong, I’m just telling you that adding a link to this iconic Kirby song at the beginning of the race would have been nice, don’t worry

9538698
Aah ! You meant "forget" :twilightsheepish:
Well, actually no, I haven't forgotten to add it.

the speakers start to blast a catchy song

The link is at the word "catchy song" :raritywink:

9538711

:facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof:

Sorry about that, o just realised that I make that dumb as F mistake (I really need to put more atención)

:facehoof:

9538733
:rainbowlaugh:
That's alright, it happens. You should see what I accidentaly write before I reread the chapters, sometime I wonder how this happens.

9537863
don’t go twilighting on us twi.

Login or register to comment