I'm older than your average brony, but then I've always enjoyed cartoons. I'm an experienced reviewer, EqD pre-reader, and occasional author.
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Twilight Sparkle enjoys her friends' visits. They only want to help, after all. But when the line between dream and reality blurs, she must decide whom to believe, the ones she's known for so long, or the one she mistrusts the most.
"Are you afraid of the good you might do?"
Anonymous old peasant woman to Madeleine, Les Miserables.
Second-place winner in the /fic/ write-off "Sweet Music."
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oh goodness me
I like this. As far as depictions of mental health problems go it was thoughtful, nuanced, and not at all woe-is-me feel baiting. And I loved the twist.
Very well done. This almost felt like the Matrix to me, with Twilight trying to discover what was real, and Doctor Canter helping her through it. I tip my hat to you.
It should be Doctrix Canter because she is a Mare, or ¿is this like Star Trek and BattleStar Galactica where standardizations leads to sir as a universal form of address?
Whew...that was...there are no words.
Someone needs to do an animation of this.
Ah, Pascoite's daily Fimfic/EqD feature is here. Right on schedule.
4362608
Are you suggesting that "Doctor" is an exclusively male title? I don't think I've ever encountered that opinion, or the word "doctrix" for that matter. Heck, even my spell checker hasn't heard of "doctrix".
4363168
Doctor and Doctrix (when looking at them as Latin terms, rather than english) are the masculine and feminine forms of the words. The English language didn't really adopt "Doctrix," and doesn't use it, so I don't know where he would have gotten the idea...
4363192
I dont think English is Walabio's first language, with the clearest indication being the upsidedown question mark in the comment. I recall seeing that used in Spanish, and possibly Portuguese, but nowhere else that I know of.
Kind of confused.
4362608
What the fuck kind of backwater bullshit misogynist podunk creepfaced back-asswards two-bit anachronism do you come from where they still append -ix on female titles.
4363192
Actually, it was used in the past, even in America. Think a century or two past. Take this amusing take.
4361746
What twist, exactly? I'm thoroughly confused
what.
4363939 the twist that there is no twist. There's no evil plot, there's no magic spell, there's no nightmare moon, it wasn't all a dream. Twilight had a nervous breakdown because she was pushing herself too hard and now she needs psychological help from a trained professional - but it's a deeply confusing and scary and disorienting experience. That's my read anyway.
4365030
That's pretty much spot on. There's a little misdirection, but nothing I'd really intended as a twist, If a reader sees it that way, though, then hey, why not?
4365052 Well, I really appreciated it. As someone who has been struggling with mental health issues (though nothing dissociative like Twilight) the core message "you need help and you need to accept what's going on and move forward" is really resonant. I read it through a few times and liked it a lot.
Great story, it really takes a while for it all to sink in doesn't it? I've always thought mental illness should have a stronger focus on fimfiction, it's just so interesting and grounded in both reality and irreality.
And it teaches a life saving lesson. Not everyone can fight mental illness, you need to learn to get help and grow together rather than wither by yourself.
It's also the first time I've seen mental illness shown so vividly, sokudos to that :)
4363440
1. Dear sweet Luna above, I can't stop laughing after reading your full reply.
2. Hmm... I actually didn't know that... I mean, I knew the word existed. Just not that it was ever used in the English language. I'm a bit of an anachronist, myself (more so in the realm of design/fashion, not societal stuff...) so I'm actually a bit bothered that I didn't know that...
But, meh... what're ya gonna do? At least I can say I learned something new today.
4365955
Why thank you. Reading it now, it seems just a bit over the top. Did you read the Hofstadter essay? It's really poignant. I'd call it funny, but it's meant to make the reader feel uncomfortable.
I'll need to reread this, the entire time I was thinking: "Oh she's in a coma and she'll wake up at the end."
"Coma coming up any second now..."
"Right.... about.... now?"
"Wait, when did she wake up?"
"She wasn't in a coma!?"
This was one of those stories that reminded me to actually enjoy the story itself instead of spending the whole time guessing the ending. Though to be honest, the lack of any explanation makes it difficult to not spend the whole time wanting to guess the ending. Just wanting to find out what was going on kept me reading.
I loved the message at the end though. Great job.
...That was good.
I liked it, reminds me of... ah, what was it? For the life of me, I can't remember Obsolesence's story with the letters of an aging Twilight to Celestia.
Regardless, this was brilliant (even if I didn't quite figure out what was up with Twilight).
10/10 - "We require additional Pylons..." Starcraft 1 Protoss Cap Error Message
Excerpt of the Somber Mind that is Kenny
This... This is excellent. The mustache counter has reached 99.
Very nice work, Pasco.
Interesting look at mental illness.
Excellent story. Couldn't put it down or decide at first if Twilight was dying or going crazy. Good job
Noticed three possible errors:
“It looks—” Fluttershy screwed up her face “—gray. The purple’s running a little.”
Perhaps you meant scrunched up as opposed to screwed up.
Twilight bowed her head. Maybe she shouldn’t have taught him such relentless logic. “You’re right.” He looked up and smiled uncertainly at her concession. “You’re right,” she repeated, then watched his smile grow.
Perhaps you meant confession as opposed to concession. Also "You're right," she repeated as she watched his smile grow. Both work, and given the disjointed nature of the narrative I can see that being on purpose.
4370390
Scrunch vs screw:
Scrunch is more of a cutesy thing, like you're being playful. Screwing up a face is more to show uncertainty, maybe even a bit of distaste.
Confession vs concession:
Confession is to admit to something you did wrong. Concession is to give in, to agree that the other person has won the point or argument.
They're both intentional word choices, though the ones you've suggested wouldn't necessarily be wrong; they'd just change the sense of what was happening.
4372661
I see. Those are contexts I was unfamiliar with. That's pretty awesome
This was... Almost unnerving to read.
Well done, as someone said above, it was hard to keep from constantly guessing and analyzing what actually was going on.
Thumb'd and fav'd!
It's been awhile since I read good psychological fanfic. I had begun to think that all they would be now is "It was all a dream" or "Everyting that happened in the show/movie was all apart of they're delusions because they're crazy and in a psych ward". ~Ooooooohh~
But this dispelled that thought. It was a good read with plenty of intrigue and suspense, and even a good twist. I had to go back and read it again to notice that Twilight was right. Their was music playing for everypony else. While it may not get all of the cake, 'cause some other stories already took a piece, this took a good sized piece for itself and managed to steal a little from all the others. I look forward to reading more quality fics from you. I only wish that there was a Fancy Pants icon so I can say something like "You've got a bright future/Your a rising star/Etc."
10/10, two thumbs-up, 5/5 Dentists agree
Wow . . .
Why the hell did I procrastinate reading this for so long?!
Holy shit this is amazing. One of the best psychological stories I have ever seen in the world of fan fiction, and one of the best stories on this site. Period. Everyone needs to read this. Every. Single. Person.
I enjoyed the dreamlike "is this real or is this fake?" quality of the story as Twilight's friends all appear. I loved the somewhat subtle theme that popped up when each friend visited, and I really like how you chose to include Spike. Too often people forget about his relationship with Twilight.
Also you love Les Mis. Hell to the yeah!!!
4366101
that's satire at its finest!
Oh wow, this was terrific. The way you handled the psychology of it all, the music behind everybody except Twilight, the concept of "learning to dance again when she learned not to," was brilliantly done. It kept it glued right to the very end, because honestly I wasn't sure what the ending would be (I also liked that too).
What I also enjoyed was how we technically don't know the mental issues Twilight is experiencing. You don't tell us that specifically up front, instead, we are left to wonder on our own, and I love when a story makes me think and try and conjure up my own images and thoughts.
This has been on my read later list for the longest time. Shame it took this long for me to get around to it!
But this was awesome! More psychological stories if you would
DJRD
Really good story, in special due the "twist".
Hm.
Feels old.
I put this on my favorites list years ago. I must have understood what it meant then. Now, all I get from it is feels. and I have no idea what it's supposed to mean.
The understanding of youth, i suppose, has left me.
11128480
Not really sure where your confusion lies. If you're having trouble sorting out what happened, enough people in the comments got it right, particularly Otterbee.
11128942
I figured it out now. At the time I was reading it I was low on sleep and high on emotions. It wasn't going together in my mind like it should