Source
<

Bad Horse 1410887

Joined April 2012
596 followers

    Bad Horse's Stories (14)


    Should the incredibly powerful and sexy new alicorn Dark Demon King Ravenblood Nightblade pursue his destiny as savior of Equestria, or interior design?

    BASED ON AN ORIGINAL CHARACTER BY DEVICE HERETIC!!! This is my first alicron Mary Sue self-insert fic, so plz b nice. Maybe Ill write moar if ppl like it

    First Published
    6th Aug 2012
    Last Modified
    8th Oct 2012

    Comments ( 259 )

    #1 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 6d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Earlier today I wrote a nasty, unponylike rant on NTSTS's blog which claimed, among other things, that I work hard to write good stories.

    This... isn't what I meant.

    Wuten did a good reading of this.

    This story owes something to Ga'arth, Klingon Fashion Designer, and Do'Raath, Klingon Barista: 333 434 1385 1745 2362 3798 3234 3229 2996.  Probably an apology.  And I'm gonna take this space to plug Georg's To Sleep, Perchance to Dream, because it's a good Luna story and only has 110 views.  Also JMac's Thweet Geniuth on ponyfictionarchive.

    #2 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 6d ago · 2 · ·
    Reply 

    This is the most thrilling tale of interior decorating I've read today.

    Seriously, this is a masterpiece. Far better than I could have done. Thank you for writing this, everything about it was perfect and I was laughing the whole time.

    But you left so many unanswered questions. . . what shape coffee table will he buy? Should the curtains be off-white or cream? I demand a sequel. What's the proper etiquette for that? Oh yes. . .

    MOAR! And I believe moustaches are somehow involved. :moustache::moustache:

    #3 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 6d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Phil. More Phil. Phil is my new hero.

    That is all.

    #4 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    You spelled Alicorn wrong in the description......just saying.

    #5 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

    Well played, well played.

    #6 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 
    #7 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Magnificent! Purely genius!

    #8 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I didn't even notice the joke with Dan-Galf's name until my dyslexia kicked in and I read it as Gan-Dalf, hah!

    Amazing work here sir. Here's hoping for a feature.

    #9 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1039927

    It's entirely possible it was intentional, since Alicron sounds much cooler than Alicorn and somebody who'd make a black & red Alicorn OC self insert character probably wouldn't know the difference

    #10 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1039927

    Apologies, I mean somebody who'd make and use a black&red Alicron (:rainbowkiss::rainbowlaugh:) OC self-insert character and use it straight faced without a hint of parody

    #11 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Ok, now that I have actually read this story... I am now humbled, having felt the penmanship of a true master. I don't remember ever handing out an upvote to anybody ever before.... but now... that has changed. I never thought such a masterpiece could exist. You sir, deserve every praise I have to give.

    :raritycry::pinkiesad2:

    #12 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    :facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof: Dan galf, shadowhax :rainbowlaugh: :rainbowlaugh: Very entertaining

    story indeed.

    #13 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    It's so... so beautiful :fluttercry:

    #14 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1032276 Thank you for telling me a fic like this one was in the works.

    I probably never would've read it if it wasn't for you.

    I like the story. Finally an OC story I enjoy:rainbowkiss:

    EDIT:

    Oh yeah. MOAR!!!!

    #15 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

    :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

    #16 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    This is terrible and you should feel terrible about it!

    ...

    Now when your done feeling terrible, would you, like, write another? If it's not to much trouble?:twilightblush:

    #17 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    An excellent turn of self-insert parody!  Just a tad too short I suppose, wish we could have gone over the details a little more.

    Still, 4 laughing Dashies out of 5!

    :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

    #18 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Foal! Speak not of the Crimson Croissant so lightly! The byzantine folds of its paradoxical crust (So tender! And yet so flaky!) hide True Cosmic Power. And its filling? No mortal language, be it ever so subtle, can possibly explore it's, uh, oblique puissance which, by merely being, bends the world around it into new and delicious dimensions.

    It also goes well with Obsidian Coffee.

    >>1031659

    Ouch. That rant...ooof...sharp edges on that thing.

    @re: A Note Of Advice to People New To All Things Bad Horse

    Hi! If you've enjoyed this parodic little tale, why not sample some other stories written by Bad Horse. Lots of great stuff. I especially recommend The Detective & The Magician which deserves more love. Twenty Minutes, likewise, is written brilliantly but I would under no circumstances read it just after this fic. The mood whiplash alone might kill you.

    #20 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    Saw the crappy OC picture in the feature - box.

    All my wat:rainbowhuh:

    Saw the title.

    Ohhh... :rainbowlaugh:

    #21 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

    #22 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    >>1040421

    That good, huh?

    #23 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #24 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1040421

    That's the best place to throw up a little in!

    #25 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Nothing against your fic or anything, but what the hell? Poultron raged when I wrote a story based on Wanderer D's blog post with a thunderous "NO."

    #26 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Sadly, I expected something like this show up. I am amused. :rainbowlaugh:

    #27 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1031659

    If it is good to work hard to write good stories, is it not twice as good to work hard to write bad stories?

    #28 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I read this... I laughed... I like.

    :rainbowlaugh:

    #29 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    MOAR

    #30 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Oh man, this actually got written... I didn't think anybody was serious in that little discussion...

    #31 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #32 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Wha- This was actually amazing :rainbowlaugh:

    Finally a parody fic that doesn't just use the fact its a parody for bad writing.

    #33 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Simply glorious! :pinkiecrazy:

    I would expect no less from the Thoroughbred of Sin.

    #34 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I loved it. Excellent Job. You Mr. Author Person have just Cleared the Stage! :pinkiehappy:

    #35 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    *Sends poet in place* Sheer, pure beauty.

    #36 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    >>1040421

    What's that, RBDash47? You say you want me to post this on ponyfictionarchive.net? Sure thing!

    >>1040473

    Luck of the draw. midnightshadow approved this story.

    #37 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #39 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #40 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    BEFORE READING: Is this gonna be the pony version of My Immortal? -sigh- gonna give it a try anyway.

    AFTER READING: :rainbowlaugh: LOL

    #41 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    Pre-read: This sounds awful. I'm pretty sure nopony is oblivious enough to write something that terrible, here's to hoping it's a parody.

    Post-read: :eeyup: I laughed.

    #42 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    A parody that doesn't read like a parody at all...  :twilightsheepish: Thank you good sir!

    #43 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I think I would have preferred Phil to have been named Background Pony.  Beyond that though...  I approve of this!

    #44 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    The traveler said angrily, "Do not speak to me as though I were a colt! I have climbed the heights of Mt. Varanus, I have ridden the wind on the backs of dragons, and I – "

    #45 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Dammit, now I'm going to have to fave this. AGAINST MY WILL MIND YOU. :trixieshiftleft:

    Bok
    #46 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    The sad thing is, I've seen actual OCs that look like that in other fics.

    I...I don't know what's real anymore. :raritydespair:

    #47 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #48 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    This is the most riveting tale of a mary-sue alicorn, interior decorator, ever.

    #49 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    This is so much win...

    #50 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    I got a bit of a Monty Python vibe from this, that was hilarious. :rainbowlaugh:  

    #51 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Why is is that whenever someone intentionally writes a story with an overdone Mary Sue, the story ends up turning out great? :rainbowlaugh:

    #52 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    you truly live up the the name loved it.

    #53 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    First time I've read a fic with an alicorn OC as the main character and I'm completely ok with it. Then there's the fact it's a gary-stu!

    #54 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Exquisite. Thank you, o Thoroughbred of Sin.

    #55 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1040563 You do realise this is a site for the BRONY fan base. We do that kind of shit all the freaking time.

    #56 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #57 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1039927

    Yes, but he spelled alicron correctly.  :trollestia:

    #58 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 5d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Phil is best pony.

    This story is AWESOME!

    #59 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I was waiting for this to happen.  *clicks Read Later, to join the 40 other stories there*

    #60 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1039963  Alicron, the planet-sized pony robot that goes around eating everypony else's planets.  :rainbowlaugh:

    #61 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I'm going to send him a picture of my home's totally disastrous interior just to provoke his rage.  :trollestia:

    #62 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I never realized that rifts came in metric and standard.  I just hope we never run into a Whitworth rift.

    #63 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    DA (&)*(&(^*()^&%$E%&*()_*&^%$#%^&*()*&^%$#%^&*(

    i was gana write a story with this character.... idk what ill do now.

    #64 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Genius. :rainbowlaugh:

    I demand more adventures for Nightblade and Phil.

    #65 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Soon this character will get so popular, the show staff will give him a cameo.

    #66 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    "... keeper of the crimson croissant"

    Win:yay:

    #67 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1042026

    Indeed, we are really good at taking the piss.

    #68 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    omg i have the lulz! :rainbowlaugh:

    #69 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1042881 which is good, since my fic essentially pisses on bronys

    #70 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1042881 Which is good, since my fan fic (and its sequel i'm writing) pisses on Bronies a few times.

    #71 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    This was simply masterful.  Bravo, good sir.  Bravo.

    #72 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1043136

    Neat?

    WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!?

    #73 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    'twas... Okay, I've seen better:applejackunsure:

    #74 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · 1 · ·
    Reply 

    Am I the only one reminded of Douglas Adams?

    #75 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?list=LLudJDEMVJWSBJE9gMrGcM5g&v=ggic4Ht-UqI&feature=player_detailpage#t=1300s

    That is all.

    #77 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    Phil is easily my favorite OC.

    #78 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I knew somebody was going to write a story about Ravenblood Nightblade after that blog post.

    Kudos to you, good sir.

    #79 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #80 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    EPIC!

    #81 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1043173 We want tha moneyz.

    #82 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1039936  Stanley knows what's good.:moustache:

    #83 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 
    #84 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    So good I feel like I'm going blind.

    #85 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1040569 ANOTHER!

    #86 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    ... I just... I'm not sure... I don't... I can't...

    ... never mind.

    #87 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    So I am not the only one with a demonic alicorn! Well done though mine relies more on dark powers and brains rather than bulk.

    Allow us to introduce ourselves. We are Destroyah. We are many and we are one!

    #88 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    That was just absolutely brilliant. Especially the conflict about how to put two end tables with a chaise lounge - you just can't! I can understand the character, so it makes me connect with him that much more.

    #89 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I imagined Nighty and Phil as having the voices of Greg and Terry from American Dad.

    #90 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    I am sad.  It is not about the story, the story brought me nothing but joy and satisfaction.  It was a masterwork of comedic literature, which while the lowest form of art, is still quite the achievement.  No, I am sad because my self-insert, mary-sue satire is not so well-written or well-received as yours.  

    Teach me your ways wise sage!

    If you can find time in your busy schedule of :yay:ing :yay:es and getting money, please, tell me what I am doing wrong.

    http://www.fimfiction.net/story/38849/And-now-for-something-completely-different.

    #91 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1043696 Yes. Lots of moneyz.

    #92 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1044140

    Aww the pic is gone.

    Sad face.

    #93 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1044181 I saw it.

    #94 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1044204

    That's all that matters to me my love! :heart:

    #95 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1044210 Thanks. But I still want tha moneyz.

    #96 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    It is now official to the entire fandom and the rest of the universe, Phil is best pony.

    #98 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1044482 Now I want tha moneyz and Elton John Greatiest Hits: 1970-2002

    #99 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1044503

    No deal!

    ...

    I was going to say more, but i got sidetracked by a song having to do with  don't, you, want, me and baby.

    #100 · Chapter 1 · 40w, 4d ago · · ·
    Reply 

    >>1044573 How 'bout just Elton John, no moneyz.

    0 42916 173953
    Anonymous comments currently disabled. Please register to make comments