Ok, constructive criticism time.  Chapters could stand to be longer and more descriptive.  The dialogue is there but the entire story could use some more description.  The chapter feels a rushed for getting into equestria.  There are some gramatical errors I can tackle when I get home with an actual keyboard in front of me rather than an iPhone.

As for idea wise, it's diffrent.  I sort of like the idea of having a set of people going together into the CGotGverse.

Corrections:

Capitalize at the beginnings of lines

Double check for punctuation usage (in line and end of line), examples

     "Well then shall we go" should be "Well then, shall we go?"

     "okay Jones you've been a brony for about a week now soooo. Who is best pon" should be "okay Jones, you've been a brony for about a week now soooo, who is best pony?"

     "I think it's because of the resembelance I mean come on the only differences are the skin color and the gender"  should be  "I think it's because of the resemblance; I mean, come on, the only differences are the skin color and the gender." (don't be afraid of the semicolon, but two independent clauses should be separated by either a semi colon (if you don't want a pause, such is the case here) or a period (if you do want a pause))

Spelling:

Who is best pon? -- should be -- Who is best pony?

I think that's it for grammar and spelling.

love it but im a lil worried about what they will look like since they didnt really specify what kind of pony they would want to be. But i do got a feeling that Jones will be similar to DJ-PON3.

kool I like that this is completely different than other stories ive read.

^Same commnt as above^

>>10375951037595 thanx that's what I was going for

I wait all this time...

>>12328661232866 i'm so sorry but i will make more and longer chapters so keep your hopes up

lol'd!

kool