Damn good story moar my fine friend moar

Wow I was right to click that watch button huh. Keep it up, because I am interested in seeing more of your work sir. As payment for such a story I shall give you one green thumb and a spike with a moustache.

I really dont know if i can live with this AU.

This is wonderfully written, i just cant stand the AU.

I dontregret choosing this one i had manygood choices but im glad i chose this one

I love this story. Please, keep it coming.

more plz! This is epic!

>>10271231027123  what are you talking about???this is one of the best AU fics I've ever read!!!

>>10327571032757

I just can't live with it. I don't like it. Maybe if i tried to get past the 2nd chapter i'd like it more... neh, ill put it in read later.

i have to say, well done.  not that many writers can interest me in such a way that i become almost ... obsessed, lets say, with their stories... Good job, keep up  the good work, and don't let our wining about release times stop your quality of writing.

I am enjoying this story! Like joglow said, dont rush yourself!

Alright I have to say I am VERY IMPRESSED with your writing! The story really let's you see MLP FiM or actually Equestria in a different point of view! Rainbow Dash in actuality is one of the most favorited pony but here she is liked the least and seems depressed and very lonely. I get the Last Action Hero vibe after seeing our Maverick get pulled into Equestria. Set to favorite and I am watching to see where you go with this!

Not sure how to reply to comments; I'm new here, so I hope it works.

Thanks to everypony for the amazing support!

>>10327691032769 What is an AU? It would help me fix it if I knew what it was. I'm guessing Alternate universe, and if it is, could you tell me, just so I can be sure? Can't really fix an AU if it's that, but maybe I can help with the part you're having trouble with.

>>10265561026556 Thanks : ) I like your story too, and I hope it won't end the tragic way you're foreshadowing it to end : (

>>10329931032993 Whining about release times? Did I whine about release times? I don't remember this.

>>10493901049390 :D I was aiming for a depressed Rainbow type of idea, and if we have the same idea of an action hero, Maverick will sorta fit the bill.

@Mavinator5 Awesome!  I am anxiously awaiting the next episode of Saving the ponies!

>>10512281051228 sorry, meant our whining. 'twas a late night read, and i couldn't see the keyboard... sorry for the misunderstanding

Maverick you're not thinking about what I think you're thinking are you?

>>10516991051699 He was indeed thinking about what you thought he was thinking, I think.

Oh I guess we'll just have to wait and see!

Ou could a a meeting with derpy in one chapter

>>10512281051228

It means Alternate Universe. I think it is brilliantly clever, and wonderfully written, i just cant stand reading it, because my brain refuses to believe this universe. Like how some people can't read clop.

>>10533081053308 Ha, i get what you mean. When I search, I usually filter out anything with human or AU, just because. I wasn't sure if this was AU, so I didn't tag it.

>>10533641053364

I can usually stand AUs, this one just..meh.

well, good job, again!

I'm sure things are going to get quite interesting during his stay.........if not a emotionally dramatic rollercoaster lol....

honestly i don't see why some ppl don't like AU that much, far as for fim is concerned i see as a way of portraying what you already understand/know of the original in a what-if way of perspective.....with that it's expected to be hit n miss with ppl due to personal preference............>.>....which sorta makes the entire statement kinda redundant but whatever......

>>10569021056902 Arg, I've always hated emotional roller-coasters. They make me so sad when the people are like "Yeah, we need to break up, then make back up in a month." There will be highs and lows, but I don't want to break the extremes.

In other news, I've been having trouble with how fast things are going. Initially, I was planing on going super slow, then it sped up, now it's too fast! I'm gonna slow it down in a mischievous and mind boggling way (not really)

I see what you mean about the AU though, I don't like AU because I basicly came her for TwiDash stories. The site has opened my eyes to other possibilities, but AU and Human stories, asides mine, aren't my style.

Sorta got off topic, sorry 'bout that.

>>10596341059634

naw its all good....

Hearing different opinions/thoughts on something is always sure to be interesting at least......>.>...

edit: wow i replied at EXACTLY midnight........

Totally sweet chapter, looking forward to more. As generic and mindless ad that sounds I mean it lol

Hehe Maverick learns something new about pegasi and it seems he was rather shocked at his discovery!

I wonder how the trip to Rarity's will go and can't wait to see! I really like how the story is flowing and I get a CoolWorld vibe just reading it and I like it!

Hmm Twilight now has a pretty heavy burden placed apon her hopefully her fits of losing control doesn't cause problems! The story is shaping up very well I must say keep it up!

I also like the addition of the Fan Fic Mood Wings as a way for Maverick to find out more about well hmmm.. certant things.

Also it seems Rainbow is returning to her former self and  to put it into Rainbows words...  cool!

waut so rainbowdash was only using him and didnt really like him or am i reading this wrong

>>11163531116353 Somewhat. What was happening was that Rainbow loved him, but she thought it was just a passing thing. You know, like a highschool crush. You fall in love because they look good or they did something nice, you got out for a bit, you break up, you get sad, then you move on. Rainbow thought that was what she was experiencing; not a full blown relationship, just a quick pick me up because she was so down. That being said, she assumed that she could have moved on had the relationship gone sour, unlike all the others who thought it would break her apart. Turns out they were right.

>>11198941119894 ok butnow that leaves another question is she sad she loves him i mean wouldent finding the love of you life make you happy

>>11199161119916 IMHO I feel its Rainbow Dash's uncertainty in herself. She's actually found her "special somepony" but cannot admit it yet cause it's in her character. It's gonna be interesting to see these two's future since BOTH of them  have an awkward sense of feeling for this relationship.

>>11199161119916 Rainbow does love him, very much so; after all, she can't stand to let him out of her sight. The reason she seem's so unstable is because she's scared that she'll make a mistake that will drive Maverick away. If she does that, she know's that she'll be in more pain then she can imagine.

>>11215841121584 Also, this is a valid point. Although Rainbow always has a cool mask on, it's clear that recently she's begun to lose that. She didn't talk the same way and all her friends knew she was depressed. Since she's never been in a relationship before and this is a make it or break it relationship, she's never had any practice doing this type of thing. Can you imagine if you suddenly fell for this one person and if they left you you would never be able to love anyone else ever? That's how she feels.

>>11216151121615 Agreed! A very good show of her character not wanting ANYONE/ANYPONY (heh) seeing her scared always trying to keep her TRUE feelings pent up inside her until  it builds up to a point where she dose something rash and unexpected.

>>11216151121615 ok i get it now thanks for clearing that up.                                                                                     >>11215841121584 and thanks to you to

>>11250981125098 Hey no thanks needed If anything thank the author for this wonderful story

Yup I'm definately hooked on this story! .... Must have more!!!!!

Interesting take on an alternate universe. A little rocky, but interesting once I read more into the story. At first I thought this was going to be nothing more that an over-exaggerated fast paced ship, but again it makes a morbid kind of sense once more is read. Honestly, I am not positive I like this story yet, but I do find it fascinating. Definitely one to keep an eye on.

Oh, on a side note, you may want to add a space between paragraphs to make it easier to read. I almost didn't read this at all do to all the paragraphs running into each other. Also double check your grammar and spelling a second time. I noted several common mistakes, nothing to worry about, but easily avoided if you slowly reread your story and correct before you post. I know it's a pain in the flank, but makes your story much better looking and also much higher quality.

All in all, an interesting read that needs to be watched. I gave you a thumb up due to it being a good read and catching my eye, but only future chapters will make it a favorite. Keep up the good work and keep the dream alive!

>>11619051161905 Thanks, I think? I'm assuming that was more complimentary then anything.

Following up on that... Why do people even put the extra space? I've never seen the necessity; it just makes the story bigger. But if you think it's a good idea, I suppose it may be worth looking into...

Grammar eh? What is this grammar of which you speak? In all honesty, it's just mistakes because I'm writing too fast. I want to re-read it, but whenever I do (as odd as this is about to sound) I get drawn into the story and forget to check for mistakes.

Anyway, thanks for the constructive critisim; it's always welcome.

>>11620741162074

Yes it was complimentary. I seldom comment on stories, but heck I liked this one. New ideas are always nice. Sorry if I came off brash or abrasive.

Image: http://iambrony.jsmart.web.id/mlp/gif/125318%20-%20animated%20exploding_lamps_are_a_health_hazard%20lamp%20rainbow_dash%20Read_It_And_Weep%20screencap.gif

The real way rainbow will be responsible for killing them all...

I would love to read this, but I can't. It's a giant wall of text. Break it up, give it some breathing room!

>>11619051161905

Yeah, exactly like he said.

Basically if you're writing a story, you never hit enter just once. Starting a new paragraph? Enter twice. Someone new is speaking (same thing as starting a new paragraph, really)? Enter twice. You might not see the necessity as the author, but it's very important to the reader.

>>11639071163907 Aright, I'll be remaking the text so it's no longer a wall, as well as correcting the numerous mistakes, after i submit the next chapter. You'll be able to read it at that point.

>>11639071163907 Also, I just though of this, but last time i checked, books, at least in the human world, are not double spaced. Something to think about.

>>11660081166008

Purely because it would almost double the production cost of the book if they were. It is, however, an absolute fact that spacing out your paragraphs makes them easier to read. If publishers could add a blank line between each paragraph without it affecting the production cost they'd do it in a heartbeat.

>>11660951166095 Oh, so that's why. Makes sense.

I really like this story so far. keep up the good work!

Nice :)

i am loving this

>>11758171175817 Zoom, have you read TheLogoliners new blod post?

>>11758341175834 I will but for rit now lets say how epic this story is and how we want to have the next Chapter soon.

Great Chapter.

>>11758341175834 did just now.