• Published 31st Jul 2012
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I Would Give to You - Jet Howitzer



You move to Ponyville, and a certain mare catches your eye, but are you right for her?

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Chapter IV: A Means to an End

(Here you go. Let me know if you spot any mistakes I may have made.)

With more elegance than any one pony should ever be able to display you swept through the clouds, pushing yourself to the furthest limits you could. The giant billowy clouds taunted you with their incredible softness, but you were having too much fun soaring through the skies to bother resting, even in the welcoming softness of a cloud. You grazed the edge of the clouds with your wingtips, catching small plumes of the clouds in the ends of your wings, leaving trails of cloud behind you.

With a grin, you spotted a hole in the cloud cover far above, and you pumped your wings mightily, clawing for every bit of altitude you could get. As you grew closer to the hole in the clouds you felt yourself grow more and more tired with every pump of your wings. As you grew closer to the gap the fatigue you felt began to manifest itself as a slowly growing pain in your wings. Each flap brought you closer, and each flap caused the pain to grow.

As you finally managed to reach the hole your wings simply gave out, letting you plummet towards the ground so far below. You flipped over, end for end, as you raced towards the ground. You tried to extend your wings to stabilize your descent, but they wouldn’t obey your commands, instead they simply flopped about in the gale. And to make matters worse, the clouds below you were a dark gray color. And every so often you caught a flash coming from the cloud.

As you grew closer to the storm brewing below you, you closed your eyes, knowing that entering that maelstrom would spell your end. Despite yourself, you felt a shout of terror break from your lips…


And as you screamed you sat up in the guest room of Twilight’s library. Your fur was drenched in a cold sweat, and your heart was pounding in your chest. With your heart still racing, you heard the sound of hooves outside the door, followed by a gentle knocking sound. You stayed silent for a moment, and then the knock sounded once again, this time with a measure of hesitation between the knocks.

“Come in.” Your voice was hoarse from your shout, and it was shakier than you thought it should be. The door opened slowly, revealing the lavender mare that called the library her home. Her face was one of concern, and you could see a trace of fear there as well. When she saw you on the bed, the fear quickly vanished, and was replaced by still more concern. She approached you slowly, as if worried that her presence might worsen your condition.

When she was just a few feet from the foot of the bed she stopped. You patted the bed beside you, and she offered you a small smile before she obliged you, and moved around to the side of the bed you had indicated. She seated herself beside you, and she laid a hoof on your side, but she quickly withdrew it.

“You’re shivering. And wet too.” You just nod, and the mare’s horn glows softly for a moment. The glow intensifies for a moment, and then you spot a towel floating towards you, from the bathroom you assume. The towel grows nearer to you, and you grab it with a hoof, and then you drape it about your shoulders. It stays in place for a moment, but then Twilight changes her position slightly, and she begins to rub it along your back, working to get the moisture out of your coat.

Her touch is gentle, and you find the treatment much to your liking. Were the situation different, and you weren’t in such a sorry state you’d find yourself truly enjoying this moment. Instead, you felt your mind reeling with the memories of the dream you had just experienced. Other than some minor differences, it was startlingly similar to the day you flew through that storm cloud; the day you lost your wings.

As Twilight finished with the towel, you noticed that your hooves had stopped shaking. Having finished with the towel, Twilight cast it aside, letting it fall to the floor beside the bed. You watched as it fell to the floor, and you couldn’t help but notice a number embroidered on the towel. You felt Twilight’s hooves wrap around your shoulders, and faster than you thought you could, your attention shifted from the piece of cloth to the mare holding you.

You had heard of this level of concern before from the letters you had received, but to actually experience it was a whole new thing to you. Back in Fillydelphia this kind of treatment was unheard of. Sure, from truly close friends you’d get a measure of sympathy, but never anything quite like this. You didn’t quite know how to react to the embrace, so you simply sat there and enjoyed it. After several moments she released you, and you brought your head around to look at her. She met your gaze, and you could make out the tiniest blush on her cheeks.

“Are you feeling any better?” Her voice had a small measure of hesitance to it, and you were unsure about why. She’d done nothing worth being nervous about, so you just smiled as you responded.

“Yeah, much. It was a bad dream that caused that entire hullabaloo.” As your thoughts returned to the dream, though, your smile quickly disappeared. “A dream.” The mare got up from the bed after an awkward silence lingered in the air for a few moments. She made her way to the door, her horn levitating the towel beside her.

“Morning will be here in just a few hours, so try to get some more sleep.” She closed the door as she left, the latch settling in place with a soft rattle. Just before she exited you felt a small pang in your chest, one that wanted you to call out to her, but you stopped that before it could manifest itself as an actual cry. You had felt these feelings before, and that had only led to more grief than you could handle. Your ineptitude with mares only made things far more difficult than they had any right to be.

She was just a pony here to help you, and her compassion was that of one friend to another. And you couldn’t let yourself fall for her, either. She was just a source of hope to you, right now, and that wouldn’t make for a lasting relationship. Once she finished helping you, your affection would begin to peter out, and then you’d be left with nothing.

A relationship built on the kind of basis that this one was being built on would be a strong friendship, of that there was no doubt. But it wouldn’t be able to grow beyond that.

Or, to be more accurate, you wouldn’t let it grow beyond that. She would get you your wings back, and then you’d be able to audition for the Wonderbolts, and your father would take you back in. You’d be able to live out your dreams, and then you’d be the stallion your father wanted. Even when he acted like an ass, he was still your father. And he’d no doubt disapprove of you being with a unicorn, even one as powerful as Twilight. She was, sadly, a means to an end.

You concluded your thought process, but even still it kept coming back. Your own line of reasoning didn’t mesh with the way you wanted to live your life. Your father kicked you out because you lost your ability to fly. You were still his son, and yet he just kicked you out. Why should you have to go back to him and try to earn his favor again? You had it, and then a single mistake, albeit a costly one, lost it all for you. You didn’t need his approval. All you needed was your own. And… And maybe Twilight’s.

“No. Dammit, no. I can’t let myself fall for her. She’s just helping me to get my wings back, nothing more.” She kept worming her way back into your thoughts, despite your desire to push her out. Maybe you could try. Maybe you could give it a shot, if only to get to know one of Fluttershy’s friends a bit better. Celestia knows that you could do with making some new friends here in Ponyville.

You laid back down, careful not to let your wings unfurl accidentally. The ceiling drew your eyes as you reclined, and thoughts of Twilight pervaded your mind. Surely this was a simple crush, and nothing more than that. Sleep was long in coming to you, and when it finally came knocking you allowed it in without a moment of hesitation.


A photon of light traveling to your eye from the sun takes just about eight minutes to travel the massive distance. Eight minutes traveling at almost two hundred thousand miles every second. Do some rough math, and you’ll get a figure around ninety-three million miles. No small distance, to be sure. Now, the small gap in the curtain that covered the window was just a couple inches across. A small target when standing just a few feet away, but from a distance of ninety-three million miles? But even with all of those figures, the sun still managed to put a beam of light right into your opening eyes.

You blearily raised a hoof to stave off the beam of light, but it wasn’t enough to thwart the light now filling the room, and so you gave up on your hopes of getting more rest. It felt like you had only been asleep for a few minutes, but you knew that it was more like a few hours. Still, your early morning soiree with Twilight had left your mind racing, and so you had spent the better part of an hour rationalizing your thoughts and feelings.

You threw the covers off your body as you climbed out of bed, and you did a series of stretches that sent a chorus of popping joints through the air. After a few minutes of stretching, you made your way out of the guest room, and into the bathroom. It took you only a short time to shower, and soon you were back in the guest room, looking at the messy pile of sheets that was once nicely arranged on the mattress. You approached it slowly, not sure how you’d go about making the bed. It’d been months since you last took the time to actually make your bed, but you felt compelled to do so, since this wasn’t your room.

After several minutes of internal debate, you finally settled on making the bed. Or, that’s what you tried to do. Instead you found yourself reminded as to why you had long since stopped making the bed. Not only was it an annoying task, it was also one you were remarkably terrible at. You found yourself wrapped in a cocoon of sheets as a knocking came from the door. You looked at the door with a mixed pot of emotion. Finally, though, humility won through, beating out pride. “Uh. Come in.” The door opened, revealing not Twilight, as you expected, but Spike.

He just looked at you for a moment, an expressionless face on his visage. You looked back at him with a sheepish smile on your face, and he just continued to stare at you. He reached out to the door handle, and then he closed it, and you heard the sound of footsteps receding from the door, and you sighed. A minute later and a knocking came from the door once more. “Yes, come in.” This time you were rewarded with both Twilight and Spike standing in the doorway. Spike’s formerly expressionless face was replaced with one of barely concealed mirth.

“Yes, I am trapped.” You shot a glare at the dragon before you continued. “No, it’s not funny.” Then, much to your surprise, Twilight was the first one to start laughing. Her laughter prompted Spike to begin, and then you found yourself the target of all the merriment, and you couldn’t keep the smile from forming on your face. Soon all three of you were laughing together. You were the first to stop, and Spike was the last.

“How, exactly, did you manage to get into this position?” Twilight approached you slowly, her horn glowing as she began unraveling the sheets.

“I… I don’t know.” You tried to recall just how you wound up in this conundrum, but it was all a vague haze of sheets and the mattress.

“Well, next time try to fight back. This is embarrassing.” Soon enough you were liberated from the cloth prison, and the bed was made quickly by the lavender mare, who seemed to have the art of bed making mastered. The glow of her horn cast a faint purple light through the room as the sheets seemed to leap upon the bed. “There. Now let’s go get some breakfast. Today is going to be a long day, since we’ll be going to the farm to help out.”

Breakfast was a short affair at the library, and just fifteen minutes later you and Twilight were headed to Sweet Apple Acres, if only for a short while. Preparations for the coming celebration were taking place across the entire town, and Twilight had been given the responsibility of organizing the whole thing. She seemed to take to the task quite well, and it made you feel good to see her so happy, even if you hadn’t contributed to her feeling of satisfaction.

Arriving at the farm, you saw a massive red stallion working his way through the trees as Rainbow Dash, and Storm flitted about the trees, plucking apples off them at a surprising pace. It took only a short while for Twilight to get the information she needed about their pace, and whether they thought they’d make the deadline. The news was good, and so Twilight proudly put a checkmark next to the farm on her list. Next up was the decorations that were going up around the town, and for that you were headed to the boutique you had visited yesterday.

The trip there took place in silence, but you didn’t really mind. It allowed you time to just enjoy the scenery some more. Compared to Fillydelphia, everything about Ponyville seemed quaint. The buildings, Twilight explained, were almost all built by hoof, and there was little that was made outside of Ponyville in the town. Other than things that couldn’t be realistically built in the town everything was built here. As the two of you wandered through the town, heading from one shop, or stall, to the next, you saw many ponies that were helping out with the preparations.

Twilight greeted most of them by name, and nearly all of them responded in kind. Some even introduced themselves to you, and you were happy to reciprocate. It was amazing, to you, that all of these ponies were so kind to each other, and to you. You saw many ponies stop what they were doing to help one another. A few times you even loaned a hoof to help out. By the time noon rolled around you were standing outside Sugarcube corner, every item on the list taken care of, save the visit to the very shop you stood outside. As you neared the door you put a bit of spring into your step, and you held open the door for Twilight. She gave you a warm smile as she entered, and you felt your cheeks grow a bit warmer at the attention.

Inside the shop was a storm of activity as the owners tried to get everything in order for the celebration. They only spared a quick glance in your direction as you entered, and soon Pinkie came bouncing out from the back of the shop.

“Oh, hi Twilight. What brings you by today? Are you here for some delicious cakes? Or maybe some muffins?”

“No, Pinkie, we’re just here to make sure that everything is being readied for the Summer Sun celebration.” Before Pinkie could respond, one of the two older ponies responded.

“Don’t worry, Twilight. We may be frantic right now, but we’ll have everything ready in time for the celebration. We wouldn’t dream of messing this up, considering that the Princesses will be there.” Twilight smiled warmly at that answer, and with a small flourish Twilight checked off the last item on the list.

“That’s great, Mr. Cake. I’ll be coming by again the day before to do a final check, but everything is looking good here, so I’ll let you get back to work.” With that said, the unicorn turned about and headed for the door. You followed her out, and with that done, she simply stood in front of the shop. “So, is there anything you’d like to do, now that we’re done with the checklist? We have some time before I have to meet up with my friends to take care of a few problems.”

You raise an eyebrow at that, but you leave it alone for now. “Maybe we could grab some lunch? I’m feeling a bit hungry.”

“Sure, we can go to the café in town. They serve some of the best hay fries around.” She turned to head towards the café you had passed earlier, and you followed her, already trying to puzzle out the problem she had mentioned, and whether it had anything to do with what you remembered that unicorn filly talking about yesterday.

(Well, there it was. A certain issue is going to be coming up next chapter, and those of you who read Apples will know what it is.)