This story is being done differently to my others. Instead of waiting until it's complete before I publish it, I'm publishing it incomplete so that I can get some feedback as I write.

I like the idea and your writing is good. However, we need some back story because half the time I'm wondering what caused all this.

>>10063561006356

That's mostly because I'll be covering it in the successor chapters.

>>10063781006378  <Pedantry mode activated!>  Successor chapters, my brother.

>>10067311006731

Ah, thanks.

Well fuck

>>10067451006745 So awesome! The first violent fanfic I've read. Really cool.

This is badass. Cant wait for more.

This could be interesting.

Princess Cadence and Spike and the Apples are caught in the middle of a holy war.

Like many of my fictions I will be writing, this will be made into a comic at some point. Because I work visually more than literary.

not bad dude

Damn, how many factions are in the war?

One warning, don't make so many factions you can't keep track of them.

Again epicly badass.

Could you make a post describing the known factions and their leaders.

>>10231171023117 Actually, that'll be happening during the story itself.

Oh yeah, now there's only two factions: Ponyville Alliance and the "Celestians" (forgot what they're really called).

This is shaping up to be a good story!

>>11186481118648 Celestial Temple. But I like that name... Celestians...

Anyways, thanks

This is awesome.  I've told you in real life and I'm telling you online.

Must see the conclusion!

Woo. I sense an epic battle coming

[SPOILERS]

Oh, I forgot to mention. There are several OCs used by others in Chapter 4.

Voidgale Donovan (and Twister Alberstar, who was mentioned only) are my own characters.

Genome is my brother Stormbadger's.

Firebomb belongs to a friend on deviantART, SnipingSpy.

I... uh... kinda used them without permission... eheh... I'm sure it's fine. I didn't kill Firebomb, and Storm was ok with my mutation of Genome anyway.

oh man cant wait for the next chapter

Nice

I'm expecting someone, hopefully Spike, to fuck someone up next chapter

Holy shit! Awesome.

Hopefully, we see badass Spike next chapter.

Firstly, I'm sorry to dissapoint those that wanted Spike to, and I paraphrase, 'mess somepony up'. In hindsight, I should've added a scene where Spike fights someone, but it's not as important as the other scenes.

Secondly, I hope you enjoyed the story.

Somepony forgot to turn off the italics...

Good story, though.

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_dealwithit.png

Italics are fixed now.

You're welcome, mate.  Great story.

>>11451831145183

I'm not disappointed

>>11484971148497 Oh good. That's what my aim was

To be honest though, Spike didn't need a fight scene. As he was trying to stay out of all the fractions and get everypony back together.  I mean that's not to say he wasn't capable of fighting. ( this makes me want a western as spike as the Hero gunman!) It's just to me this feels right.

Love this story though..

>>11844111184411 I had much the same thought on the matter. Much of my stories are built on an evolutionary process, that is I have a skeleton of a timeline and let my mind create what I think feels right.

Also, western hero Spike... You've given me an idea.