While I did enjoy reading this, I really wish you'd slow down some. You're flying past a lot of details.

I assume the reason for Pinkie's injury will be revealed later? I'm very curious to know what happened.

>>10953471095347

um........try reading the last chapter of Nightscares thats when she got the injury.

I am enjoying this thoroughly, but I would like to say that you're moving awful fast. Some questions here haven't been answered.

Like the reason for her "Pinkamena". Or how she was injured.

Aside from that and what seems to be lack of depth, this is great!

>>10968551096855 You didn't read what I told Equ-us did you......all of that is explained in my other story Nightscares. But sence you most likely don't want to read the whole story I'll just explain for you.

So what happened was Pinkie had a bunch of nightscares where Pinkamena was killing Gummy and Rainbow and then Pinkamena became her own person and made the dreams real but Pinkie stopped her before she killed Dash and they had a battle (witch is where she got injured) but in the end it was AJ who killed Pinkamena because Pinkie was near death by the end. That's what happened.

.........You didn't read the other two comments on the page did you?

Ya a really short chapter put part 2 will be longer im just not in the mood.

>>10972821097282 No I didn't. And I'm sorry for that. I shall go read "Nightscares" though. Just so I know what's up.

>>10974081097408 Ok sorry if the story is bad....I'm not really good at writeing stories hope you enjoy the story anyway!!!!

>>10973361097336 how did she hurt her leg

Dammit Discord! I know it's you! SHOW YOURSELF! *takes a shotgun out of nowhere*

>>10983501098350 u pplz dont read comments anymore....do you. LOOK AT THE COMMENTS ABOVE YOURS!!!!!!!

>>10987631098763 ........................................................................now I feel like I need to add discord.....................................

>>11006031100603 didn't read that

>>11011061101106 I could tell....

>>11013761101376 holy shit love your avatar who is that

>>11013921101392 It's Reverie Metherlence from the manga/anime Elemental Gelade, and thank you!

>>11036501103650 is the show good

>>11045211104521 Ya...at times I kinda think WHAT THE HELL?! why would you do that!?! and other times im like :D and as for the manga......I wouldnt know. My sister has the manga and anime but only the first five episodes of it she lost the others I watched the whole show on youtube but for some reason she wont let me read the books........

Well thats anime for ya also is it still ongoing or is it finished also if you to put it in a catigory what type of anime is it like action fantasy etc.>>11061681106168

>>11063401106340 it's finished and I guess it would be action fantasy...I think

>>11064511106451 maybe ill take a look at it oh by the way if you like comedy a really funny chibi anime is Kill me baby

dafuq another cupackes

>>11065851106585 no. it's NOT cupcakes.

>>11065061106506 I'll take a look at it!

>>11066841106684 so then is pinkamenia like her true self and pinkie pie is the lie she created to the point she beilives pinkie pie is her true self?

>>11067041106704 ummmmmmm yes

just what does she want to do?

>>11107941110794 It's a surprise

Creepy...

>>11149101114910 thank...you?

So Pinkemena is free to cause her unique brand of fun and Fluttershy and Rainbow's relationship is in trouble. Interesting developments. Gonna keep an eye on this and see how it goes.

heres a solution forget about pinkie forever

We're all gonna die. RUN AWAY!

*jumps into a General Lee that occasionally was there*

>>11164721116472 Thank you and I hope to see the next chapter of appleshy soon.

>>11168741116874 Now why would we do that?! That means no more fun...

>>11169351116935

>>11185261118526 it would be a simple way at least for fluttershy and rainbow

>>11185501118550 Ya but then she would just be trying even harder for their attention cuz we all know thats all pinkie wants

So, I'm going to call on my editor side, and outright say it.

Your formatting is horrible, you have grammar, spelling, punctuation, and capitalization errors everywhere.

  Your chapters need to be 1000 words minimum each, no real exceptions, and as pointed out before, your pacing is way too fast.

I'm not going to track this, but I will leave it a thumbs up, solely because the plot appealed to me.

>>11571981157198 I came on today after being sick almost a week to fix spelling and this is what im greeted with? I'll go fix it now......

>>11575271157527 Erm, well, I guess that was rough, let me rephrase.

What I pointed out doesn't necessarily need to be fixed, but y'know, those things kinda matter here on FiMFiction.

As for the chapter length, I suppose you cant fix that, but I'm just saying, in the future.

Btw, what do you write with? Because a program like MSWord could catch these errors while you write.

I suggest getting a editor, every story is better with one.

>>11575811157581 Well from now on I'll write with MSWord to make sure there are no spelling errors, and in the future I'll make longer chapters. I'm still new at this and I'll try to get better thanks for the help!

>>11576661157666 Don't worry, (and excuse my harshness on my first comment, not sure what happened there) everyone starts somewhere.

Haha, you should of seen  the first story I ever posted, it was a mess. It's gone now, but whateves.

By the way, MSWord stands for Microsoft Word, which is usually a default program on your computer.

Best of luck to you.

>>11576741157674 Your stories look so interesting I wish I could watch you.....guess I'll just have to settle for tracking the stories instead...

>>11577161157716 You can't watch people?

>>11577221157722 No for some reason my watch butten never works

>>11577831157783 What browser do you use, internet explorer, Google Chrome,or firefox?

if you don't use it already, I highly suggest getting Chrome.

>>11578041157804 we use internet explorer but I'll go look into chrome....

>>11578191157819 It's a quick, free download, and it will make your watch button work.

Holy dooly!

>>11758861175886 not sure how to respond........

>>11762441176244 Me neither.

>>11951021195102