Clockwork

by 71NYL-5CR4TCH

Spike Vs The Diary

I smile as I finished my thoughts. To share these complex ideas with another pony was so foreign, yet so comfortable. I suddenly feel like all the time I had spent in my own head, all the eons of never-existent time, or solitude, were worth it. I am finally share my emotions, my thoughts, and my gaps with another...

Twilight places down her now empty teacup.

"You talk a lot." She states abruptly, with a frown and condescending eyebrows.

Oh...

"Well, yes, how else would I communicate with you?" I ask, hoping to seek a better method of expressing my ideas.

"Words are great for expressing these abstract ideas you have, but I, am a mare of science!" She suddenly interjects, raising her hoof in the air.

I am taken off guard by this, she so quickly goes from seemingly annoyed to proud and enthusiastic. How can she change mood so quickly?

"And you, Dr. Metaphysics, are in my park now!"

I...what?

"You see, we have a common love, we both love books, is that fair to say?"

"Uh, yes, that's fair."

"And since you, seem to have read every peace of parchment to ever touch ink in Equestria..."

I have never read diaries.

"We're going to do something you've probably never done before."

"And that is?" I ask, genuinely intuitive, while somewhat annoyed.

"We're going to add to a field, not just learn what already exists. We're going to SCIENCE! Twilight stuck her hoof proudly in the air, eager to begin what was, to hear, I can only presume a most entertaining task.

I stood from the couch and walked over to her, still frozen in a strange victorious pose, with a hug grin, and a look of fire in her eyes.

"Um, I know I'm not in a gap, you can move now."

"Right...anyway, to the laboratory!"

"Downstairs right?"

"In the basemen- oh jeeze you read the books in the basement too?!"

"Not your diary!"

"Good, because I...wait, my diary is in the lab?" Twilight suddenly perplexed.

"Yes, well last time I checked anyway. Also, are you also aware you have a small purple dragon reading your diary whilst dusting in your laboratory?"

Twilight gritted her teeth, "YeshIAmAwareOfASmallPurpleDragonWho'sSmallPurpleAssIsInSeriousTrouble."

"Uh..."

"SPIKE! GET UP HERE, NOW!"

and I thought teleportation was fast. I'm fairly certain he got up here in negative time, which should be impossible, yet...

"*ahem* this fine visitor informs me that he saw you reading my diary while you were dusting, is that true?"

At the present moment, Twilight possessed a face.

This was no ordinary face.

If this face were seen by gods, they would weep.

I am currently trying not to burst into flames due to simple vicinity, of this face.

If demons had Halloween, they would dress up as this face, and still scare each other holy.

I stepped into my gap, and decided, against my better judgment, to analyze this face.

Oh sweet Celestia.

I am compelled to draw this face, and use it as a home security system.

But as I finish the final lines, the paper inexplicably bursts into flames, proving that two of this face, cannot exist, even outside of time.

For some reason, I know to take a few steps back, before I step out of the gap.

So I do, and step out

The dragon speaks up, "uh, well, maybe just a tenseyittybittypeek?" Holding up a claw, as if to measure the insignificance of his peek.

The face has gone.

"Spike...do you know what your punishment is?"

"Cleaning duty for a week?"

Twilight smiled and giggled, almost maliciously, while shaking her head "No..."

"Cleaning duty for a month?" The dragon, apparently named Spike, offered up.

"Not quite."

The sing-songy way she says that causes my mane to stand on end.

"Oh come on Twilight! Anything but that! I didn't even read anything juicy, I swear!"

"Nope, the punishment must fit the crime. I don't know what all you read so I don't know how bad I need to punish you. Therefor you are receiving 'mystery punishment'."

Spike flings his fists in the air, deeply inhaling before letting out a bellowing "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

"Mystery Punishment?" I ask.

Spike gives me a dead pan expression, "It's the worst thing ever. Essentially, I have no idea what the punishment will be, or when it will pop up, but I have to clear my whole social calendar because as soon as I do, she has chores for me as part of 'mystery punishment'. I also can't get a good night's sleep because she could take away my gems while I'm sleeping as part of the punishment. Basically she does nothing until I finally crack and tell her what all I know, and she decides what's left from there."

Hm. Sounds effective. Punishment of paranoia. interesting.

"Why don't you just fess up now and get it over with?"

"Dude, you don't know twilight like I do. When you see that face, 3 days. You gotta wait 3 days for her to cool off."

He leaned in closer to me and whispered "Plus everyday I can hold out, the more paranoid she gets about what I know, so the bargain gets sweeter for me disclosing the info."

"I am standing right here you know! I know you're whispering!"

I do not understand other life forms.

"How often does this happen?" I ask, as Spike clearly has a battle plan.

"He tries this about once a season. I have no idea why he keeps doing it, he knows I'll catch him."

Spike whispered to me again, "I read this thing like it's the daily newspaper, but you had to but in and get me caught, so keep your mouth zipped, got it?"

I stand up, "That's not appropriate, nopony should ready diaries of others."

Twilight adorned a smug grin and nodded, "That's right spike. You should respect other's privacy."

I lean down and whisper "Does it say anything about a stallion named Clockwork?"

I said I didn't read diaries, I never said I didn't ask about them.

"Uh...no." Spike offered.

My heart sinks for a moment before I remember we've 'known' each other for a reality of 30 minutes.

"Alright Spike, give me the diary, I'll hide it...again...so about our experiment." Twilight mumbles as she tucked the diary into a dresser drawer.

"Hm?"

"I was hoping to run some tests on you, so we can get a better idea of how your special talent works."

"What, uh, what kind of tests?" I asked, made nervous now by the witnessed unbridled furry of Twilight.

Twilight looks up the stairs, at the retreating dragon, and back to me. Up the stairs, back to me.

"Fun little 'field' tests..."

I am never EVER touching this mare's diary.

Author's Note:

Hi guys! I really seem to be in a writing mood right now, so I'm cranking 'em out while I've got the motivation. So this chapter, as promised is rather different from the others, including much more comedy, much less philosophy, and a general pallet cleanser to keep things interesting.

Comments

[wille179]

That's better. Less philosophy, more plot.

[Sergiovan]

This was hilarious! Although the philosophy was great, this change is very much appreciated

[Ephraim Blue]

I'm going to favorite this now. I cant wait for new updates.

[71NYL-5CR4TCH]

4100591
No, that's the literal clock ticking. He thinks on normal time in this chapter

[71NYL-5CR4TCH]

4100893
It's not an evil laugh, just the 'inception' noise, it's a joke

[BlaappyMLP]

Superb writing and concept. Itching for the next chapter!

[Cold Spike]

Maybe show more emotions and physical changes? I'm guessing Twilight was smiling a ton with her last line of dialogue, but I could not tell because you did not write that.

[-Brutus]

Mystery punishment, ha!

[The Gardenhead]

Dat Twilight rage face

[Dragaun]

4101269
Its better to Show then to Tell and all but some authors like to leave it to your imagination ...imagine the scene that just played out and try and paint your own picture. For instance I did (as did you I'm sure) picture twilight with an evil smirk even though he didn't flat out say/describe it.

On that note. Yes describing Twilight as smiling menacingly as she looked from Spike to Clockwork and back again would help paint the picture and adding more emotion and body language would greatly improve the story. but I still highly enjoy it. Mostly because I feel I know the characters and can imagine the scene without it being shown to me.

[Super Trampoline]

Well this was certainly something different. This had me giggling a lot. But seriously, I would gladly become your editor. I like this story, but it still has little errors here and there.

[Gucinnio]

Twilight reminded me of Izma from Kuzco New Groove!

[Lord vonsithen]

GAH ITS TOO GOOOD TO BE THIS SHORT!!!!!

[someone else]

I personally liked the philosophy portion of it, to think of all that we miss within a few seconds.

[SwimmingDalek98]

Note to self… Do NOT fuck with Twilight… and nice philosophical parts, by the way. I really liked them!

[AggroViking]

I really like this story, it's amazing to read. But there are a couple of gleaming grammar errors and speech marks that are missing in certain places.
I would point them out, but I reckon a quite once over of the chapter would sort them out toot-sweet.

[Doctor.whooves]

4100806 I for one welcomed our new philosophical overlord. :/
Also have an Ood (;,,,;)/? Actually why not zoidberg (\/) (;,,,;) (\/)

[Leonzilla]

4101524 I don't know about others but my mental image consisted of an angry face with the lines well defined and the features really marked. Just like angry fan art.
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTsUkLICkYAqvf5EnV1V2JbrGKHMDzksCqPsZ1hDuoim0HWw4oo
Imagin Twilight like this is what gave it is legendarily impossible qualities.

I do not understand other life forms.

Not with that attitude you won't.

4101598 Same here, I was able to spot many in this chapter.

This chapter was funny,

I want more,

~Leonzilla

[Leonzilla]

4103379 Indeed, life may have a lot more meaning in a lot different ways than mention in this story.
The number of ways is only limited by ourselves.
As I mentioned two chapters and comments before yours: assuming that :

"The meaning of anything is simply to give meaning to it's contrast."

I concluded from 1-8:
3) "Meaning" is defined as the value and reason why we(aware concepts/things) appreciate the relative existence of something.

~Leonzilla

[Crom251]

Favorited. Worth it.

[The Shade]

4103345 Y32, 137'2 90, 3123 7H!2 2705Y W!11 N3V35 233 7H3 1!9H7 0' D4Y!

[Potential_Hero]

Awesome story, mate! Keep up the good work

[Moonlit Oasis]

This was no ordinary face.
If this face were seen by gods, they would weep.
I am currently trying not to burst into flames due to simple vicinity, of this face.
If demons had Halloween, they would dress up as this face, and still scare each other holy.
I stepped into my gap, and decided, against my better judgment, to analyze this face.
Oh sweet Celestia.
I am compelled to draw this face, and use it as a home security system.
But as I finish the final lines, the paper inexplicably bursts into flames, proving that two of this face, cannot exist, even outside of time.

I died reading that!

[Equestrian Clock]

This chapter killed me to death.

(Yes, I wrote it like that on purpose.)

[The Watcher 509]

Sometimes, we need little jokes like these to comfort the viewers from being stuffed to the brim with thought-provoking philosophy. Good job