though i wonder if i am supposed to start laughing like a maniac from a picture inside my head featuring luna mounting twilight while speaking using the royal canterlot voice. For some reason i found that incredibly funny.
I don't say that as the direct explanation of any emotion; I don't say that as the extension of any sort of physical feeling. I say that, first and foremost, in a very intellectual sort of way. Although altogether unfree from pornographic contrivance, this is acceptable not as a clop - even the very 'best' clop writers tend to be mediocre by any general standard - but as a work of literature. The humour is executed in a manner that can best be described as 'well' and the composition is, to an extent, flawless. I didn't dwell on the sex scenes, so I cannot really speak for their quality - but no bit of dialogue made me cringe, no contrivance but 'goddess of sex' making me giggle where I oughtn't.
I'm favouriting this story and liking it not because it is a 'good clopfic'; I do so because it is a good story, in the sense that I would have considered this the same if it had no sex at all and judged it on the same level. I have been wondering very sincerely, these past few days, if there existed a writer who could place their commata as well as they could their hooves.
Why do I find reading clopfics so fucking boring? oh... probably because i'm asexuel... this just do anything for me... all i really want to know is why luna wants twilight so badly... i find it kinda odd, is it because she's the element of magic or because she was the only one that was brave enough to help luna after her return and she was the only saving her from nightmare moon? from a romantic perspective this story is really lacking and it is for the romance i read this... nothing more -_- so i'll probably stop reading this as i have a feeling this will center around sex and much less romance.
Gah, this is... creepy. The fact that it's well-structured and well-written only makes it more so. Like "Patty Cakes" level creepy; maybe a bit more. I'm actually far more comfortable with straight violent rape and gore than these subtle coercive mindgames. This story stinks to high heaven of rape but won't admit that it is. It disturbs me, which is saying something given the shit I sometimes fap to. Clop to this? I'm pretty sure this made my penis softer as I was reading it.
>>As Twilight’s panting became less intense, Luna leaned in, pressing their bodies together and running a hoof over the side of Twilight’s face. Her voice came slow, and subdued:
“My. Dark. Apprentice.”>>
Luna then noticed that Twilight had passed out. As planned. Smiling with smug triumph, she stood up and flew to Celestia's tower, where the Sun Princess had been awakened by the cacophony in Luna's tower and stood waiting with the most Internet- meme-like frown imaginable.
"Luna," Celestia grit her teeth.
Luna smirked, "Sorry Tia! I told you not to wait too long! Now Twilight's my sex slave!"
"One ah these days, Luna!" Celestia growled. "One ah these days, TOOO THE MOOOOOON!!!"
Luna flew off, laughing, as Celestia began to cry and gorge on cake.
[EDIT} I just read chapter 4. It appears my post will be surprisingly accurate!
992564>>993854 This is more like statutory rape. If that helps. For Celestia or Luna to have sex with anypony is inherently statutory rape, since god is to adult as adult is to child. That's not the creepy part to me - what's creepy is Luna as a straight-up BDSM dom. You knew it the moment Twilight had to yell at the guards to get them to leave. She'd trained them to insist on being treated disrespectfully. So it hurts to see Twilight swearing who knows what away to Luna.
But that doesn't make it a bad story. It makes it a risky story, one that can easily turn on its author. Violence is bad, but we don't say Tolstoy is bad because people get killed in his books. "Lolita" is much, much creepier than this, but that doesn't make it a bad book. I think.
To clarify: I don't object to the story. I dislike what Luna is doing, but you're supposed to dislike what someone is doing in a story. I don't dislike what Luna is doing because it's BDSM. I dislike it because it's perverted BDSM. The most-common way of things is that a sub realizes he/she is a sub, and seeks out a dom. Luna is a dom seeking out a sub. This is still okay. What isn't okay is that she is binding Twilight into a master/slave relationship before fully explaining what it implies. This is a BIG no-no within the BDSM community.
Personally, I've always seen Celestia as the obvious dom, and Luna as a sub. But Luna's canon character is so inconsistent, I like this interpretation better than trying to adhere to all of canon, which leads to madness.
993854 It'd be better if it didn't masquerade as a romantic fic when there's clearly no romance lol. Whatever romance there might be hasn't happened, and is pants on head ridiculous.
995158 Statutory would imply she's too young to consent, which is debatable. This is less about Twilight not being able to consent so much as Luna coercing her into consenting. Brb reporting this 'cause rape with a romance tag.
...I just realized this is the same person behind Swallowing Caramel. That really rustles my jimmies. WHY DID THIS HORRIBLE CATASTROPHE GET A FEATURE, WHY COULDN'T IT HAVE BEEN HIS GOOD RELEASE?! Sigh.
995186 I think you're overreacting. It's already Mature. It's not rape. It's mind games, but so are a lot of relationships. There's a big gray area here that you're pretending to be able to make definitive judgements about. Give it a few chapters. Also, you can't know what that tag is supposed to mean yet. I have a fic coming up that might merit the romance tag, that is about rape. The romance part doesn't come into play until the final chapter, and doesn't involve the victim, which anyone reading the first chapter would assume it was supposed to.
I really hope this doesn't turn out to be a fic that where Luna plots the overthrow of her sister. Other than that, I'm really enjoying the story so far.
995340 I have to disagree that it's not rape because Twilight had the choice to do this with Luna, it's not as if Luna forced herself upon her without Twilight's say. And Twilight also had basically a whole day to decide whether or not she wanted to and at the end, she decided she did.
Why are so many of these clopfics so well-written? It's easy for me to chalk up clopfics as a whole as "not my cup of tea" when they're poorly put-together massacres of the English (and sometimes Spanish) language, but this? This is good.
Not sure about this coercion thing, as people have already pointed out Luna gave her a day to think about it and back when Twilight first gave consent Luna turned her away specifically becouse she was making the decision too soon. Not to mention she made the final decision at home 2 hours before the meeting, not at the last second under pressure. Then Luna still gave Twilight "an out" even after all that. Seems to me like Twilight had every opportunity to say "screw this", and back out.
Now I suppose some of you might ask for more time, but it's a freaking clopfic! How long would you expect them to wait? 10 Chapters?
Knocking on the wall and using her Canterlot Voice: "Would you two be quiet out there!"
-----------------------------------
I loved reading this and I say while reading the clop parts I was so interested in reading it and its story than I was ever interested in the Clop part. You sir get an internetz
1. Luna offered the rite under the condition of secrecy.
2. Twilight was given a day to think things over, coming to the conclusion that she wanted to accept later that day.
3. Even in the processes of performing the Tantric Rite, Luna gave Twilight three chances to back out, which Twilight denied each time.
I'm not sure where you're getting the conclusion that this is rape. Is it because of the romance does not conclude in the romance typical of a romance tag? Can you elaborate? 995186
It Begins
Also, welcome back!
you've the princesses mannerisms down pact good show
I'm entertained. Keep it up.
wow i think i nearly blew a gasket, jeezus is it hot in here or is it just me -3-
989337 its not just you.....
you have me now wanting more of this
Wow.... That was amazing.
1.bp.blogspot.com/-7j3k20nC3Z4/TwXmRzVC80I/AAAAAAAAAHE/jAFPtz8mOmc/s1600/bert+wat.jpg
Oh course this get's featured. Of course it does.
This should have an AU and a Dark tag like it's nobody's business.
hmmmmm..
Not bad, not bad at all.
Also, Asura of war? Neat touch, what with the differences between an Asura and a god.
That was hot. MOAR
*adds to Favorites list, goes to fetch clean underwear*
This is quite good. keep it coming!
Ooooh, TwiLuna... I'll check this out later for sure...
Marvelous story, simply marvelous.
though i wonder if i am supposed to start laughing like a maniac from a picture inside my head featuring luna mounting twilight while speaking using the royal canterlot voice. For some reason i found that incredibly funny.
......................proceed
Meanwhile in Celestia's chambers......
"My Celestia senses are tingling!"
i cant believe im saying this about a clopfic.. but this is really really good!!
though i did laugh at the overuse of " my dark apprentice" by Luna.
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/250x250/23179205.jpg
I am pleased to know my previous concerns were unfounded.
989319
dat gif, I can't stop laughing whilst looking at it
Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssssssssssssss
I have never felt more sexually attracted to Princess Luna than when reading this. Daaaaamn...
This story is good.
I don't say that as the direct explanation of any emotion; I don't say that as the extension of any sort of physical feeling. I say that, first and foremost, in a very intellectual sort of way. Although altogether unfree from pornographic contrivance, this is acceptable not as a clop - even the very 'best' clop writers tend to be mediocre by any general standard - but as a work of literature. The humour is executed in a manner that can best be described as 'well' and the composition is, to an extent, flawless. I didn't dwell on the sex scenes, so I cannot really speak for their quality - but no bit of dialogue made me cringe, no contrivance but 'goddess of sex' making me giggle where I oughtn't.
I'm favouriting this story and liking it not because it is a 'good clopfic'; I do so because it is a good story, in the sense that I would have considered this the same if it had no sex at all and judged it on the same level. I have been wondering very sincerely, these past few days, if there existed a writer who could place their commata as well as they could their hooves.
You can.
2.bp.blogspot.com/-0W22YOv7Fs8/TaCn9hqp4VI/AAAAAAAAAOk/K_0ZwXWJtSA/s1600/Emperor+Plapatine.jpg
989235 Even though that was when they said "I am your ... Soldier!", I still heard that in the Dalek's voice.
VICTORY! VICTORY!
this was
EPIC
WRITE MORE
989755 more so the dark tags, but I fwel you.
Cheesiest rape fic ever. Not sure whether to laugh at how bad this is, shudder that it got a feature or write a parody. All of the above.
Why do I find reading clopfics so fucking boring? oh... probably because i'm asexuel... this just do anything for me... all i really want to know is why luna wants twilight so badly... i find it kinda odd, is it because she's the element of magic or because she was the only one that was brave enough to help luna after her return and she was the only saving her from nightmare moon? from a romantic perspective this story is really lacking and it is for the romance i read this... nothing more -_- so i'll probably stop reading this as i have a feeling this will center around sex and much less romance.
Gah, this is... creepy. The fact that it's well-structured and well-written only makes it more so. Like "Patty Cakes" level creepy; maybe a bit more. I'm actually far more comfortable with straight violent rape and gore than these subtle coercive mindgames. This story stinks to high heaven of rape but won't admit that it is. It disturbs me, which is saying something given the shit I sometimes fap to. Clop to this? I'm pretty sure this made my penis softer as I was reading it.
>>As Twilight’s panting became less intense, Luna leaned in, pressing their bodies together and running a hoof over the side of Twilight’s face. Her voice came slow, and subdued:
“My. Dark. Apprentice.”>>
Luna then noticed that Twilight had passed out. As planned. Smiling with smug triumph, she stood up and flew to Celestia's tower, where the Sun Princess had been awakened by the cacophony in Luna's tower and stood waiting with the most Internet- meme-like frown imaginable.
"Luna," Celestia grit her teeth.
Luna smirked, "Sorry Tia! I told you not to wait too long! Now Twilight's my sex slave!"
"One ah these days, Luna!" Celestia growled. "One ah these days, TOOO THE MOOOOOON!!!"
Luna flew off, laughing, as Celestia began to cry and gorge on cake.
[EDIT} I just read chapter 4. It appears my post will be surprisingly accurate!
[EDIT #2] I found the most perfect pic, but it won't post! URL at least. :/ http://mylittlefacewhen.com/f/4109/
...I'm thinking Luna just wanted Twilight in the sack ^.^
992564>>993854
This is more like statutory rape. If that helps. For Celestia or Luna to have sex with anypony is inherently statutory rape, since god is to adult as adult is to child. That's not the creepy part to me - what's creepy is Luna as a straight-up BDSM dom. You knew it the moment Twilight had to yell at the guards to get them to leave. She'd trained them to insist on being treated disrespectfully. So it hurts to see Twilight swearing who knows what away to Luna.
But that doesn't make it a bad story. It makes it a risky story, one that can easily turn on its author. Violence is bad, but we don't say Tolstoy is bad because people get killed in his books. "Lolita" is much, much creepier than this, but that doesn't make it a bad book. I think.
To clarify: I don't object to the story. I dislike what Luna is doing, but you're supposed to dislike what someone is doing in a story. I don't dislike what Luna is doing because it's BDSM. I dislike it because it's perverted BDSM. The most-common way of things is that a sub realizes he/she is a sub, and seeks out a dom. Luna is a dom seeking out a sub. This is still okay. What isn't okay is that she is binding Twilight into a master/slave relationship before fully explaining what it implies. This is a BIG no-no within the BDSM community.
Personally, I've always seen Celestia as the obvious dom, and Luna as a sub. But Luna's canon character is so inconsistent, I like this interpretation better than trying to adhere to all of canon, which leads to madness.
993854 It'd be better if it didn't masquerade as a romantic fic when there's clearly no romance lol. Whatever romance there might be hasn't happened, and is pants on head ridiculous.
995158 Statutory would imply she's too young to consent, which is debatable. This is less about Twilight not being able to consent so much as Luna coercing her into consenting. Brb reporting this 'cause rape with a romance tag.
...I just realized this is the same person behind Swallowing Caramel. That really rustles my jimmies. WHY DID THIS HORRIBLE CATASTROPHE GET A FEATURE, WHY COULDN'T IT HAVE BEEN HIS GOOD RELEASE?! Sigh.
995186
I think you're overreacting. It's already Mature. It's not rape. It's mind games, but so are a lot of relationships. There's a big gray area here that you're pretending to be able to make definitive judgements about. Give it a few chapters. Also, you can't know what that tag is supposed to mean yet. I have a fic coming up that might merit the romance tag, that is about rape. The romance part doesn't come into play until the final chapter, and doesn't involve the victim, which anyone reading the first chapter would assume it was supposed to.
995308
>Not rape
>Uses coercion for sex with a virgin
I'm not a law student, but I can safely tell you that that's not going to help you in a rape trial.
>Romance
>"Graphic Twilight Sparkle x Pretty Much Everyone But Mostly Luna clop fic."
-.(\
I sincerely doubt there's going to be some romance subplot, and TwiLuna is basically out the window, because rapes tend to do that to romances.
995380 One of the few disasters the author will hopefully avoid. Just about the only thing that can't go wrong at this point.
I really hope this doesn't turn out to be a fic that where Luna plots the overthrow of her sister. Other than that, I'm really enjoying the story so far.
993891
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw4109_large.jpg
there ya go
995580 ...
I missed the part where you proved that the sex wasn't coerced and thus it wasn't rape. Saying it's seduction doesn't change anything.
forums.watchuseek.com/attachments/f20/712657d1337394705-need-some-help-identifying-watch-what-gen-seamaster-thanks-point_over_your_head.jpg
What and why did I read?
995340 I have to disagree that it's not rape because Twilight had the choice to do this with Luna, it's not as if Luna forced herself upon her without Twilight's say. And Twilight also had basically a whole day to decide whether or not she wanted to and at the end, she decided she did.
Nightmare MOON that was amazing...
wow just wow this is turning out to be very interesting
dat blank space
989319 mine as well
*Slams face into desk*
Why are so many of these clopfics so well-written? It's easy for me to chalk up clopfics as a whole as "not my cup of tea" when they're poorly put-together massacres of the English (and sometimes Spanish) language, but this? This is good.
Really good.
I hate how good it is .
:)
word can not describe how amazing this was.
Not sure about this coercion thing, as people have already pointed out Luna gave her a day to think about it and back when Twilight first gave consent Luna turned her away specifically becouse she was making the decision too soon. Not to mention she made the final decision at home 2 hours before the meeting, not at the last second under pressure. Then Luna still gave Twilight "an out" even after all that. Seems to me like Twilight had every opportunity to say "screw this", and back out.
Now I suppose some of you might ask for more time, but it's a freaking clopfic! How long would you expect them to wait? 10 Chapters?
You know what Celestia is thinking right?
"Luna's found a new playmate."
Knocking on the wall and using her Canterlot Voice: "Would you two be quiet out there!"
-----------------------------------
I loved reading this and I say while reading the clop parts I was so interested in reading it and its story than I was ever interested in the Clop part.
You sir get an internetz
img829.imageshack.us/img829/8128/1freeinternet1236x200.jpg
Okay, let's put some things down on paper.
1. Luna offered the rite under the condition of secrecy.
2. Twilight was given a day to think things over, coming to the conclusion that she wanted to accept later that day.
3. Even in the processes of performing the Tantric Rite, Luna gave Twilight three chances to back out, which Twilight denied each time.
I'm not sure where you're getting the conclusion that this is rape. Is it because of the romance does not conclude in the romance typical of a romance tag? Can you elaborate? 995186
theforce.net/kids/coruscant/probe_droid/palpatine.jpg
EMPEROR WANT!!!
Come for the clop, stay for the sheer emotional epicosity.