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AU. Based on the first season. Twilight and Celestia begin to drift apart due to a misunderstanding. Will Luna speak up and repair the breach, or will she remain silent to keep her new friend, Twilight, all to herself?
"It's labeled shipping, but isn't really that shippy! "
- EQD
"Sage. Reported."
- /co/
Yes, it's the same story that was posted on fanfiction.net. Mostly at least. I've made some minor revisions as far as grammar and spelling go, so hopefully this version is a better read. I'll be continuing the story on both sites since several people have contacted me that they would prefer to read it on here rather than on fanfiction.net.
I'm glad you liked it, and it would have been interesting to hear it read aloud. Hopefully it sounds better than it reads.
I'm waiting for someone to draw a picture of Twilight swooning in Luna's arms while Celestia has just burst through a door in the background looking stern. I think it would fit if Luna's hair were swept back like Fabio's too.
Yes it is here, what a glorious Day, one of the Stories that majorly got me into TwiLuna shipping
cannot wait for Chapter 6 or an Update whatever maybe sooner
But the sex scene was the best part
You're here! IT'S HERE! Omigosh, the fanfic that started it all for me is here! This is what got me excited about FiMfics, and even inspired me to write my own! You might remember me as wrabbit75 from FF.net, but here I'm just Wrabbit. Dunno if you remember, but I helped you edit this story there. Sorry to gush, but this story is special to me. 
Replace Blue Blazers name with Storm Dancer and boom, the story becomes Static World. I dont know which story came first, I'm thinking yours did but still, the setting are exactly the same, what happens is exactly the same: twilight gets captured, Luna gets her magic abated. The only difference is how Luna handled it all by herself (fuck yeah!) instead of how the whole main cast was there. And then what about Shining Armor!
Then I died at the cliffhanger.... GAH I LOVE THIS SFFLJSDBFJKLDSFHAJKFJLSALHGAFB
After managing to read the whole of this story in two days... THAT CLIFFHANGER! 
At least i know it'll be updated Soon(TM). 
Very good read, i would very much recommend setting aside time for two or three chapters worth, every time you sit down to read this story. It's seriously that good.
Wow.
21k words in this chapter and at the core of it all they did was go to AJ's farm for a day.
That's freakin EPIC!
There was so much detail, and everything was developed so well.
You gave AJ more depth than the bloody show does!
This story is awesome, and I'm definately reading it all.
Course it doesnt hurt that it's TwiLuna =P
Bad ending:
Luna better doesn't get a concussion where she loses her mind and forgets what happened with Twilight that entire week.
Good ending:
Twilight helps luna out of the (cave?) chasm and both talk about their feelings. Celestia finds Blue Blazer and asks what happened. He says that they are death and fell into the chasm yadiyadiyaaa
This is one of the best stories I've read in a long time. Not just counting online either. It's even better than a lot of books that I've read recently and I was amazed to find out that so far this story is longer than the first three Harry Potter books which happen to be the last few I've read (damn by the way). It has become a story dear to me in many ways already. Your characterization of Luna flows so well with the conflicts presented to her and I cannot wait for an update as that cliffhanger has left me in terrible suspense! This has made my heart surge with joy at times and at others has brought tears to my eyes. I hope you don't mind if when you're done I print this out and bind it so as to have a paper copy I can read any time! It really is that good in my opinion.
Go ahead. I for one am going to print it out, and bind it really nicely, and then display it on my coffee table. When curious visitors ask about it, I'll proudly tell them, "It's a story about magical lesbian ponies."
I was thinking of the prisoner ending, where a large bubble chases them down, and seems to suffocate them, then Luna wakes up and at first thinks it might have been a dream or a psychedelic hallucination, but then there's some minor clue that makes it seem like it was all real.
It's best to approach this story with the assumption that everypony has a thing for everypony. Only some ponies more so.
What can I say? I like apples. After researching them, I now regret not entering the exciting and fascinating world of pomology. As for this story being Twiluna, it might not be the best ship, but it looks like it's going to be the one I'm sailing straight to the bottom.
Thanks everyone who has commented so far, and hopefully the next chapter won't be a disappointment after that nasty cliffhanger.
Could have told an entire paragraph of what i was thinking ^^
But i don't want to spoil it for the rest letting my ideas run wild.
Anyhow your idea looks interesting aswell. I don't know how it will end up cause every idea is unique but since the entire story has been a good read i will trust you with the ending aswell :p.
Good luck!
great opening chapter!
on a different note: sex scene?
was there really one earlier? it just seems so out of place, that i have a hard time telling if you're kidding or notOh my god! OH MY BUCKING GOD! This is finally here! This was the fic that got me started on fanfiction!
Mankind must have been created with the express purpose of making sure a gem such as this was written. And I for one am glad.
I am proud to be your 100th like. This is such a glorious day!
Don't Let the Sun Catch you crying came first. Static World is a complete and poorly done ripoff.
As a catalyst for further and more in-depth analysis of Luna’s psyche, primarily the potion that is Nightmare Moon. There are enough ponies forgiving Luna for Nightmare Moon, one of them at least needed to be a fanatic who didn’t. One who would force Luna to examine who she really is.
Or, it could be a subtle pro-feminist message, promoting a misandrist agenda by portraying females, particularly lesbian females in a positive, logical light. Meanwhile depicting males, already marginalized in the story and the source material, as unthinking and violent brutes.
My personal theory is that the author sucks at writing, and thought that the story was becoming too shallow and unvaried. So they just threw in an action scene all willy-nilly. I think we can expect a kitchen sink sometime in a future chapter.
I sometimes feel this story will never be complete. I think there's only about 100k or so words left in the budget though. I hoped that the change wasn't too sudden. I tried to throw in some foreshadowing, but I guess I wasn't good enough.
I won't go so far as to say that I love the story so far, but I'm looking forward to the new chapter too. Hopefully there won't be too many more revisions. It's on the cusp of becoming the longest chapter thus far, and it really shouldn't be.
Thanks for continuing to read the story, although I think your praise may be a little too glowing. Let's not forget this is just a story some random person made up about a television show about magical ponies. It's not exactly Shakespeare. (Although I have stolen a lot from him. Like an entire chunk of dialogue from the Merchant of Venice.)
Sorry bro, I didn't mean to. The last chapter was just getting so long I cut it in half. Unfortunately this half is taking longer than anticipated to wrap up.
Sometimes I have a hard time telling whether I'm kidding or not too.
You're sounding defeatist - show some moxie, man, you're almost done!
The needing a conflicting point of view to the forgiving consensus is a very valid point, and as such I will resume being optimistic about the development in the next chapter. It still comes out of nowhere, mind, but I can appreciate what you're striving for.
Well,maybe I felt it was sudden to me because it has been too long since read it this story that I forgot the foreshadowing and that's why latest chapter caught me off guard.I mean the 6th chapter felt so perfect to me I seriously thought it ended there...but that's just me,of course
The good thing is that I probably will re-read everything to catch any missing details
But keep it going! this is my favorite Twiluna fic and if you still feel there's more to be said then go ahead.I'm looking forward to the next chapter 
I don't think that Blue Blazer's craziness came out of nowhere — there was some pretty heavy foreshadowing at the end of Part 2e:
[W]hen he stood back up, I guess he’d figured out what he needed to figure out. That was when he seemed a bit angry, though not at you, Your Majesty, and he was pretty determined about something.
And later:
As Celestia and Captain Quicksilver made their best-laid plans [...]
Gang aft agley.
I actually skipped back to Part 2d looking for that bit, but I hadn't taken into account chapter length. Dem word counts.
finally up to date! i've been waiting an eternity (at least it feels like it) for this to show up here, and now it's finally here, and i've finally read it!
and what do i get? the mother of all cliffhangers
although; holy crap, you write long chapters
, depending on your update speed, i would suggest adding a small recap for the story so far (which is updated as each chapter is released), your story isn't exactly the kind of story you can re-read entirely ever time a new chapter is released
as for the writing in itself: i don't have much in the way of criticism, i did spot a few very small grammatical errors in a few places, but only because i took a pause in reading, so i can't really name them...
looking forward to the next chapter!
edit: oh, and your profile picture is seriously creeping me out
"Is my writing really as pretentious as I think it is?" Maybe. But I think it's just the right amount of 'pretentiousness'. For example, I found myself almost struggling to finish device heretic's Eternal. Nothing in it was ever completely explained until the end and the way each character thought about things did not seem 'intuitive' to me. The story tried to be complex and 'mysterious', but to me it was just confusing and mostly annoying.
You on the other hand, have written things well. Although the story has been fairly slow so far, I can see how each characters mind works, etc. Can't wait to read more.
I've been enjoying your story, even if you originally intended it to be a one-shot, I still think you've done a wonderful job.
Especially that you have made each character believable enough to where I can expect certain reactions, while still keep them deep and interesting. That I feel I understand the minor characters situations as well as the main ones and the emotions they carry mean a lot to stories personally.
But I suppose that'll mean more when I've finished the whole story.
Hope I communicated that alright, I'm kinda tired...
The title and the description are badly chosen.
I avoided this fic for a long time for the reason that i thought this is a Trollestia or Evil-Celestia-fic (both which i don't like). If a friend of mine hadn't told me this is neither of this, i still would avoid it.
Hey, read all of this craziness in one night because i enjoyed it so much. It reminded me of when i first read Harry Potter when i was a kid. I read somewhere you were going to update this in the near future so i hope that's true. I can't wait to see more of your work in the future!
>>1134818 I absolutely agree with you there not so much on the naming part but everything else. The Excellent writing and this Gold Piece of pre S2 TwiLuna Romance could really be sold better, it earned 6 Stars on EQD that is mentioned no were not many of those standards around, also a nice telling cover picture needs to be found something like the Chapter 6 Hug Scene in Picture form.
YES YES YES YES
god this is gonna take a while to read.
can't wait
It updated?
Now if only I can remember what was going on...
...ARGH!
I knew that was gonna happen. I knew she was going to tell her and I knew it was going to be a misunderstanding of sorts. And when Luna started to leave I knew she was going to realize what Twilight meant but I HOPED she would've managed to jump or something and confess back. x_X
Fine, I can wait for the next update, I guess...
Luna smiled happily and cheerfully replied, “Oh, Twilight, I love you too!”
“I love all my friends, very much,” Luna continued.
Don't you bucking dare
Luna raised her voice, encompassing the rest of their friends. “Each of you has been so kind to me.”
After reading this part I felt the need to post another comment
Ah, adorkable Twilight and adorkable Luna. So cute.
I'm glad you took the time to wrap up this part of the story properly. So often after a climactic scene like the previous chapter, the author rushes on to the next scene. You continue to give a nice attention to detail that doesn't disappoint.
It's unreasonably adorable.
A few minor corrections:
Her feelings for the princess were a bit more complicated than what she felt for her parents. In some ways Princess Celestia felt like another mother for her, but while Twilight was certain that her parents would be proud of her no matter what, she wanted desperately to earn Princess Celestia's Praise.
Twilight, on PCP? She doesn't seem like the type 
If it had been Celestia with her that night, pouring her heart out to her, Twilight would have felt honored to have been chosen to be so interment with her.
Interment, n.: The burial of a corpse in a grave or tomb, typically with funeral rites.
Yeah, no :)
I squee'd again. Thankfully I had my door locked this time. Augh, I loved this chap.! But why must you torture me so with these cliffhangers? 
(not that I mind, I really wanted this to last longer and it sounded like it was going to end here ) Ooohhh I just can't wait for you next chap., I know it'll be amazing~!
This is slightly based on a true story. It once took me two weeks to realize that a girl had asked me out.
I love you too.
Glad you're liking it. Actually, when I originally was planning out the extended version of this one shot, this was where I was going to end the story, in order to leave their relationship ambiguous, since I was going to downplay the romance a bit in previous chapters. But a baseball bat to the knees convinced me otherwise, so we're going all the way with this one. There may even be kissing before all's said and done.
Fixed. Thanks. I'm a horrible speller, and Word likes to be helpful, sometimes to my detriment. If you see anything else that's out of place, please let me know.
I can honestly say that I've never been accused of rushing a plot. Dragging it out for several unbearably slow chapters, yes, rushing, not so much. I hope you enjoy the next chapters as much as the last.
You didn't think it was going to be that easy, did you?
I can't wait for the next one either. I hope it'll be good.
To be honest, I forget whatever happened in the last chapter, and just read the current one as a stand alone story. It's been working for me thus far.
Well there goes the surprise ending.
Tell me about it, I have to go to work in about ten minutes. Ah well, at least tomorrow is a federal holiday, so there shouldn't be that many people on the road when I go to work.
I thought it was too early in the story for one too, which is why I took it out. It was also kind of long. I mean who wants to read fifty odd pages of excruciatingly detailed pony physical relations, drawing out every hitched breath, warm, gentle stroke, and gasped out loving nothing released during the throes of passion?
Anyway, I'm sorry that you don't enjoy princess-centric romances, but thanks for giving this story a shot.
Sadly I don't have enough time to respond to everyone's comment at the moment, but thank you all for reading, and for your wonderful support. Bear with me while we wrap this thing up.
You're telling me. Seriously? I mean to each their own, but I am really kind of anti-clop, especially when it makes no sense. That was a totally logical explanation up that's doesn't need muddying. That and just throwing ponies in with the princesses seems like it really ought to have more lead in rather than less as compared to two "ordinary" ponies.
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Image: http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/h/a/happyprincesslunaplz.png
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Twilight_Sparkle_lolface.png
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why?
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Image: http://mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw1888-49599_-_season_2_twilight_sparkle_yes.png
Not that I hate flop or anything, but it makes no sense this early in the story. Well, in my opinion it doesn't work at all in a non-clop, but I always dissaprove of Princess romances. 
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