So that. Please leave comments and stuff. Did the music work out alright for anyone?

I decided to post three chapters at once because the first chapter doesn't actually mention jazz in it anywhere, and then I felt the second was just a generally unsatisfying ending.

Fourth chapter coming out next week-ish.

Interesting and original approach to Octavia. Will give this a try and then state my thoughts.

Seems like a good premise. I'll review when I finish it.

whooo buddy this looks good. realllly good.

There is not nearly enough jazz in this fandom. Faved hard.

Also i feel obligated to say this;

Y'know, sometimes were not prepared for adversity. When it happens sometimes we come up short. We dont know exactly how to handle it when it comes up. Sometimes we dont know just what to do when adversity takes over. And i have advice for all of us i got it from my pianist Joe Zawinul, who wrote this tune, and it sounds like what youre supposed to say when you have that kind of problem. It's called mercy! Mercy! Mercy!

>>977692977692

I know right? Also . . . you're famous and you faved my story!! I loved Serenade, man!

>>977624977624

>>977773977773

Thanks!

And hey, no spoilers! Lol, gonna have that be in there somewhere towards the end . . .

Very nicely done so far, faved and thumbed up. Eager to see where this goes.

This is a groove I can get with. Nice fic ya got here.

>>977844977844 I'm famous? Neato.

>>977952977952>>978055978055

Cool, thanks. S'nice to hear!

>>978062978062

Yes, well, now you know.

Well actually, I would say Serenade was definitely part of what made me want try a music fic, or whatever. So, like, that. And stuff.

This is beautiful. Jazzy Tavy is the best Tavy.

The music integration worked wonders, by the way. However...

"She turned off the turntable and speakers, and went to the door, preparing to leave, turning off the lights."

No. No, I don't think I'll be silencing Mr. Adderley and his merry band just yet, fair author. I'm a sucker for Davis, you see.

>>982059982059

Thanks! I'm glad to see Jazzy Tavy catching on!

And, yes, I had intended for Tavy to turn off the music for Vinyl, not for the reader . . . but I can see how that would seem like it would be. You know what? I'm totally gonna change that.

If this is a Octavia-Vinyl shipfic....and I usually hate those....then why am I enjoying this??? Well, you did well and you should continue...

My friend, this is a great fic so far, though i think i have a bias opinion on this one because I'm a jazz trombone player, also, why no trombone? There is an awesome song called Sunset Glow by Benny Carter that is an amazing ballad

>>982259982259

Octavia playing jass music really does make a lot of sense; when your life's work is playing music, gravitating towards a genre that celebrates unbridled virtuosity at its core seems inevitable. I'm happy to see someone doing the idea justice.

I like this premise immensely, and the music matched up with the chapter perfectly.

Looking forward to more, and Vinyl's hangover in the next chapter.

I found this to be a fun and pretty solidly written chapter. The characters have real personality. And it seems that Vinyl and Octavia are more alike in personality that one would think based on appearance. I thought it was a neat little point to have Octavia feel like more of a rebel than the punk raver pony Octavia. And I found thier matched potty mouths really fun for some reason. You did a good job of building emotional tension and getting into the heads of the characters. It was interesting to see Vinyl as the nervous one. A good job. I really like this chapter.

>>983525983525

Thanks! Hmm, yes I fear I myself may be rather biased towards saxophones--to the point where I tend to neglect other jazz horns. Sorry about that!

Also, checked out that song--pretty slick! The Basie band's recording of it's excellent!

>>986331986331

Great to hear the music worked out so well, I was rather concerned about that, to be honest.

And I'll do my best not to disappoint! Hangover-addled Scratch incoming.

>>990874990874

Thanks, it's nice to hear all that came across. I was a bit worried that the characterizations would seem a little random or un-founded, but you seemed to have picked up on all of it! Glad you enjoyed it, and I have to say--pony cuss-words are terribly fun to write. Your appreciation of it gives me the feeling of a job-well-attempted.

Oh, that was really interesting. I like the tension and the push and pull between Tavi and Vinyl in this story. I admit having the music incorporated was rather brilliant I must say. I am loving this story and can't wait to see what else is in store for these two.

Chapter 4. Hope y'all enjoy it, now!

Fun fact: I realized I've been using the wrong kind of dash throughout this whole story ( . . . no. Not that dash. [Note: Dash is not in this story.]) so I went back and fixed all those.

Derp. Who knew? Um . . . it's grammar. It's not like it's a secret or anything.

Yeah, okay, I said I fixed it . . . what else do you want from me?

. . . Competence.

There's gonna be two chapter's after this one, and then it's done! I don't want to get too far on chapter 5 until I at least have chapter 6 roughed out, too--lest I miss something I wanted to have done/blow my proverbial load too early for something. Probably be a couple weeks 'til the next one's out, so that.

This just keeps on getting more and more interesting.

This was a adorably fabulous chapter but one quick question did you change the color of vinyls magic to red for a reason. If i remember correctly vinyls magic is blue or light blue.

>>10069751006975

Shiny sweet nubbins, your right--totally forgot you could see the colour of her magic in Suited for Success, can't you? DERP. Well . . . I just picked red cuz it's the same colour as her eyes (which is the case for some ponies, I think?) . . . and, ya'know, cuz red is cool, right?

Mhrrhmgh . . . maybe I should change it . . . blah, don't know. I'll mull it over and decide some other time. For now, I'll just flash my psychic paper, which will surely read 'Artistic License' on it for anyone who takes exception to this.

EDIT: Fixed. Changed it to blue. "Choose your battles" and all that...

Very nicely done. I'm liking this more with each chapter.

>>10070641007064

... Am I the only person in this fandom who knows nothing about Dr. Who? Seriously.

Well-done multi-character interaction and dialogue never fails to impress me, in no small part because I can never seem to get that sort of thing right myself. I had just gotten my hands on some Vince Guaraldi before reading this; it meshes well with this chapter as walking-around music.

>>10089271008927

The only one? Naw, probably not--there's gotta be at least two of you! Of course there's an easy solution to all this... (watch it!)

And thanks! Dialogue has always been kind of my strong suit, I think. (It's all the fiddly descriptions that task me so.)

Hey, isn't Vince Guaraldi the guy who did the music for Charlie Brown? That's awesome, he's awesome! Since you mentioned it, I was searchin around and happened across his 'Fly Me to the Moon'... ho-boy that's classy.

>>10107161010716

Vince Guaraldi did indeed write all of the music for the first eighteen Charlie Brown animated productions, as well as lay down the recordings for most of them as part of the Vince Guaraldi Trio. In fact, the way his compositions mesh with the hugely-memorable Modernist animated segments of A Boy Named Charlie Brown is similar to your attempts to match works of jazz actively with elements of your writing, to the extent that your writing led me to dust off his music in the first place.

>>10108031010803

That's mighty big praise, I thank you!

And glad to hear my humble writings got you pulling out some old jazz stuff!

...squiffy?

Not to be rude about it, but you need to watch your "your" and "you're"s.

>>10147321014732

'Squiffy' is a real word! Means not totally drunk but still buzzed. Came across it in Tank Girl and had looked it up. Anyway, thought it sounded like a word Pinkie would use.

Also, 'your' and 'you're's: ... well that's embarrassing. Thanks for pointing that out. Yeah, that's just me being generally sloppy, I imagine. I'll have another go though it and fix stuff.

Just started reading and was going to comment at the end but I have to say that I really like how this story is going so far.

I love your creative use of pony specific cussing and all the obscure (but awesome sounding) slang.

It really makes the characters seem more 'realistic' (for a cartoon ponies anyways) as they have definite speech patterns that fit their personalities.

Also how you've clearly shown the change in Octavia's behavior by using the flashbacks as a contrast to the present day version of her is very effective. I also always like seeing a more thoughtful Vinyl instead of the one dimensional wise cracking raver stereotype.

Not to mention, I feel that dynamic between the two is not the usual dime a dozen one seen in so many fics. Now there are quite a few very good Scratchtavia stories out there at the moment that have great but different takes on the duo's characterizations. However I think this one can definitely stand out among the crowd.

Also I found myself laughing at all of Arabica's interruptions when she was totally not eavesdropping on them

(Two chapters left to read!)

I have to say the integration of the music worked perfectly.

The description from Vinyl's perspective was spot on and you accurately described the songs which I've seen unsuccessful attempts at before but you really knew how to describe the groove and the whole flow of the song and then link it into the story seamlessly.

I loved how at first Vinyl was all 'it's just noise!' to 'hmm I think I can get some idea of this music' to it actually affecting her behavior and how she felt like it was messing with her mind (the alcohol helped however).

The only thing though is that I thought the descriptions of kissing went on too long. But don't let me stop you from writing things like that (It's your story after all and I can just skim through those parts the rest is very good).

Last comment! (I know I should have just done one at the end )

The relationship and the dynamic between the two is developing really well and the whole music store scene was great especially with Lyra's reaction to their crazy antics (and suddenly best friends with Lyra which hilariously confused Vinyl. I've actually see something like that happen too). Vinyl 'geeking out' and Octavia's reaction was perfect too. And then Lyra trying to shoo them out  

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_dealwithit.png

The running gag of everyone suddenly knowing about the party was well played throughout

Of course Arabica's reaction to them dating was just plain hilarious (and then hilariously disturbing).

(I've probably rambled too much now)

>>10208221020822

Ha, no such thing as too much rambling! And also know that your rambling was well received!

Seriously, thanks for all the feedback! I'm glad you enjoyed it, and--to quote what a friend of mine said, which I find now to be applicable here--you liked all the right parts! And I'm stoked the music worked out for you, as well. It's nice to hear all this, as when I was writing, I found I was unsure if the random brain-noise in my head was translating to the metaphorical paper in a way that other people would pick up on, you know? Especially the characterizations and stuff--it was hard to tell if I was just thinking it was coming across because I already knew how I wanted it to come across, or because it was actually coming across. Or something. (...Well, now I'm rambling, too.)

Also, about the kissing: wait, wait...kissing scenes can go on for too long? Huh.

Ha, but seriously, yeah, I don't know, I guess I just find myself generally disappointed when a kissing/sexy scene is too short or is otherwise unsatisfying, so I just try to write like what I'd want to read or whatever! (And, well, fair warning: you may need to do a fair amount of skimming in the next chapter...)

I must say, Acreu, I am kind of amazed. This is being a very interesting experience: while I don't feel as offset by Jazz as Scratch seems to be, I've always taken it for granted, never bothering to actually pay attention to how songs were structured. But, well, I'd love it if you gave a few more details regarding the points in the song, because I'm having trouble identifying the change points your prose refers to.

Nevertheless, this take on Octanyl is so original and unexpected that I can't help but encourage you to go further. Octanyl is normally played as the stuffy elitists technician VS the low-brow accessible performer, work VS play, dignity VS fun, and so on. That you just sidestepped the issue like that and turned it on its head, with Jazz no less... I LOVE it.

Also, and sorry for being such a nerd, but... any chance of anything from Cowboy Bebop being played here? Like, say, Bad Dog No Biscuits?

This chapter had me giggling like a schoolflly... WAFF

The characterizations are great, and I really get a strong feel for your characters' emotions. Anyway, here's my current mood.

>>10346581034658

>>10348881034888

Hey, thanks man! Glad you like my take on this pair! (Yeah, I can't help feeling like I kinda just went, 'forget the fandom, this story's about jazz!' Or something. ...Well, that, and super fluffy sappy romance, of course!)

Alas, I probably won't have any Cowboy Bebop stuff in here, cuz I'm kind of wanting to stick with the theme of Blue Note Records/1950-60 and that sort of Miles Davis era jazz. But yeah, wow, that's an absolutely kicking ost for that show! (Love the top comment of the Bad Dog No Biscuits video, btw: 'if the pink panther could fight like a bad ass this would be his theme song.')

I do have a really awesome up-tempo song in mind for the next chapter though, it shouldn't disappoint, I think! And yeah, I'll try and put a little more reference into the text for what's happening in the song. For chapter 3, I kind of think I just tried to toss it together in a way so that it didn't fall right back apart, or something--I really had very little idea what was happening! I think I've got a few more experience points now, and so I'll see if I can't kick it up a notch for the next one!

>>10356681035668 You've got to, kick it up a notch, if you're ever gonna reach your goal...

Otherwise, yeah, if you haven't heard Bebop's soundtrack before, you totally should give it a listen. There's at least three albums, supplementary material notwithstanding. The main focus is on Jazz, but it's kind of an overview of all Western music. I'm especially fond of these few songs here, but they're not representative of the sheer diversity of this work... My absolute favourite being the one called "The Real Folk Blues".

>>10375221037522

Yeah, I've run across that show and the soundtrack from various things (like the intro theme, Tank!, is totally amazing!) ...but because of this I suddenly had this urge and definitely went and downloaded all 25 eps and the first several cds of the ost. And I'm left with no choice but to promptly go marathon that. (This...this is your fault...)

>>10412571041257 I can think of worse ways to spend one's summer days.

When Ponyville lies in ashes you have my permission to stop writing.

Seriously though, loving this so far - I admit I may be horrendously biased, being a huge Vinyl/Octavia fan, but this is awesome. Some of the best characterisations I've seen of these two, and you've definitely nailed the idea of pre-existing dynamics between characters. Even through short interactions, it becomes clear those characters know one another and interacted before the story, so to speak.  It's nice to see that done without resorting to cliché or cheesy dialogue riddled with in-jokes.

Spelling and grammar seems to be fine, I've picked up on a few small errors and stylistic things I might have done differently, but all in all, it doesn't detract from the reading experience. I'm really looking forward to seeing where this one goes from now on, and be assured I'll be about as excited for this as when I used to see 'Allegrezza' had updated back in the day. As much as I want to shout 'MOAR!' and 'NAO!', I appreciate how long it can take to write a new chapter of anything, especially a story as well-constructed as this one, so I'll just leave it at the fact that I eagerly await your next installment, and have the highest hopes for it.

Top stuff - keep it up

>>10447421044742

Wow, thanks! Excited for this sorta like you were excited for Allegrezza updates? (That was like, the fic that got me into fics! ...And, well, got me writing fics, too, probably!)

It's, uh, good to hear the grammar isn't distracting! (Let's face it: I use commas, dashes, and basic sentence laws as... guidelines rather than exact rules...but I'm learning! And at a speed and pace which would rival that of the mighty tortoise, no less.)

You can shout 'MOAR!' if you want! (It'll light a fire under my lazy ass if nothing else...and, well, no one's ever shouted that at me before. It kinda feels good, man.)

(Maybe I'll be sayin somethin different when I'm on, like, my twentieth story and I'm a bitter old ponyfic writer like everyone else, though )

Anyway, long and short: I'm glad you're enjoying it and looking forward to the next chapters so much! I shall do my very best not to disappoint!

>>10450461045046

Thanks for the reply to my comments, it's always nice when an author gets back to you

Glad to hear you're enthusiastic about writing this one, it always makes me sad to see good stories get abandoned - notable Vinyl/Octavia examples are Two's Company, Three's a Crowd, which seems to have dried up, and Moonlight Sonata whose author I remember lost enthusiasm somewhere along the line, which was a real shame. I, however, have every faith you'll continue to deliver as the story goes on. All these great stories make me increasingly tempted to try my hand at one myself, but you talented lot make it all the more daunting

I also went back over and re-read chapter 3 with the music. Earlier I couldn't, due to reading on my iPad, which, somehow, can't manage to play YouTube and let me browse the internet at the same time However, with my trusty laptop, I gave it a go and definitely think the tracks added to it all. Your descriptions of the music are also spot on, seems like you know your stuff. Being a DJ in my spare time, I can't fault your descriptions of Vinyl's kit/the genres she plays either. All seems very convincing, so well done there. If future chapters would allow for the inclusion of music to accompany them, I'd go for it - an experiment that appears to have paid off well, I'd say.

I win!

>>11060981106098

Somebody put a spoiler tag on that vid...that's the exact one from my bookmarks folder, alright!

(Yeah, s'definitely gonna be in the final chapter...)

Quite the emotional start. Lovin' it .

How's the next chapter going? I need MOAR

>>11878851187885

It goes! Nearly there, shooting for Saturday, actually! (...look forward to it? )

Hmm, I guess I said that the chapter would be out in 'a couple weeks,' didn't I? Well, I guess it was a couple not-so-much as in 'they are now a couple,' kind of couple, as in 'my parents are gone, so I'm going to invite a couple of friends over for a party' kind of couple.

I'm thoroughly enjoying your characterizations of Vinyl and Octavia . I always love seeing some of my favorite ships set sail with style .

Also, d'awww, past Vinyl wants to chill with past Octy more than she wants to spin jams .

>>11919771191977

Thanks! Glad you're enjoying it! They're really fun to write!

(Also, hee, yeah, I definitely may or may not have been totally giggling like a school-filly when I came up with that last little paragraph, there )

>>11885411188541

I'll totally look forward to it

...and the rest happens inside your brain.

Comments, criticisms? ...Questions? More importantly, The Doctor Who season seven premier is tonight. What are you doing reading this? It's done now. And it was awesome.

Hwoo, this chapter's been a marathon to write... got one more chapter left to finish it up. You mean I have to follow up this with another chapter? ...mnerm

Fun thing: This song is sort of the sound track behind the sound track for this chapter. It's like, what I get from that song, or whatever.

>>12014371201437 Honestly? 'Cause I don't like the new doctor.

Regardless, 'right in the feels', Man.

>>12019561201956

(Well okay... David Tennant was best new doctor... but still. )

Also... awesome, thanks!

>>12020181202018 That he was.

Anytime.

The end made me sad... That said, I'm hooked! Great job!

>>12020871202087

Ah ha, mission accomplished!

And thanks!

Wow. This is pretty intense feels, man.

Mmm, that was nice.

Those are some hard feels man.

By far my favourite Octavia story so far...and I've read a lot of those lately. Keep it up, I demand it!

More good stuff here, as ever. Liking the intensity of this chapter, I was genuinely worried that their newly-mended relationship was about to fall apart again

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Vinyl_sad.png

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia.png

Where would you even buy a pack of Luckies in Ponyville, anyway?

>>12109351210935

I bet her band mates help her out, there. They seem like the kind of crowd that'd hook a mare up...

(On a semi-related note, upon first reading your comment, I was like, 'what? They weren't drinking cheap beer...'   Took a moment to figure out you were talking about cigarettes. Yeah, where I grew up, 'pack of luckies' is also synonymous with a sad, sorry party--and indicative of the fact that the person who brought said Lucky was a stingy-ass )

>>12120671212067

The purchase of Lucky Lager involves a personal, fanatical devotion to the value of forty cents over interpersonal relationships and your own physical well-being.

>>12143461214346

Eeexacly

(Note: that comment entirely made my day)

(I got distracted by an awful thing called reality but I finally found time to sit down and read (and listen) to this properly)

Another great chapter with character development and blended nicely with the music like before.

Interesting how Octavia realizes she can now appreciate electronic music.

Also the whole 'secret but not really' relationship with Lyra and BonBon was a great touch and how Octavia only remembered her name by looking at her flank

Anyways, I liked how you continued to unravel their relationship and show how the past is still not resolved and thus no matter what they do the damage is done and has greatly affected both of them and there's no ignoring it, they have to come to terms with it.

Vinyl's outbursts (and hesitation) and then Octavia's attempts to suppress the issue were very intense. The end was great with Octavia finally not skirting around the issue anymore and Vinyl accepting her answer.

>>12020181202018

Tennant was the best new Doctor, true.  But 7 was best Doctor and 4 was THE Doctor.

>>12029511202951>>12029541202954>>12035211203521

I'm glad I could deliver some feels! ...that's what I'm here for? Probably.

>>12038531203853

Woo, awesome thanks! And I most definitely shall.

>>12065091206509

Yeah? Awesome! S'what I was goin for, good to hear! Glad you liked it! (I quite enjoyed that line about the 'wub,' if I do say so myself!)

>>12241671224167

I'm kind of sad I've only got one more chapter left of this, I think I'm beginning to quite look forward to your comments! Also, if you have any thoughts about what could've gone better, or stuff that didn't work for you, I'd love to hear that, too!

Also, this is the only literature that has ever given me insight to musical genres that I've given no attention.

>>12275131227513

(That was my secret ulterior motive behind this fic, all along. Mission accomplished?)

Seriously though, I'm happy my humble little fic is gettin a few people thinkin about jazz! (there's just not enough jazz love in the world...)

>>12267581226758

Mmm, yes. And yes.  I'd say so.

I haven't actually watched a whole lot of the old series, but I think it's safe to say, yeah.

How about best companion? (Note: in new series, any answer that isn't "Donna Noble" is the wrong one.)

>>12277791227779

Ace.  Ace, full on.  I mean, props to K-9 and everything, but Ace got sent to another planet when she was 16, didn't let it bother her, started carrying around the homemade explosives she used to blow up her science lab back in school (accident....), because what else are you gonna do when you're trapped on an ice planet?

Then there's this

Now, for new series, I admit, Donna is the best companion, but Rory is my favorite companion.  Donna's most useful, but Rory's an iron woobie (or plastic...), which is always awesome.

>>12274921227492

Aww thanks, I enjoy reading it

In this chapter, I didn't see any glaring errors and I think that the narrative flowed very well so I didn't pick up on anything that was seriously out of place or overly awkward. I'll be sure to tell you if I do see something that I feel doesn't work or is out of place

>>12029511202951 this

Go, Vinyl! Get'chu some!

As per the usual, quite the emotional rollercoaster! Still, it's great to see that they're finally getting past their... er, well... past. Thumbs way up for making me become emotionally invested in a relationship between two cartoon ponies, sir . Besides, they're totes adorable together and they bucking know it .

>>12957611295761

Haha, right? And awesome, thank you, thank you!

Sweet mother of Celestia engaged in a foursome with Discord and hungry Windigos!!!

How could I have possibly missed this story?!

All right, time to read! I'll be sure to leave a comment tomorrow

>>13382811338281

Ah ha ha, yay!

Don't let it distract you from writing your own story, however...

>>13383131338313

Sure thing, captain!

Alrighty! Josh is on it with a boring comment!

To begin with, I would like to say that the story is awesome and you ought to start feeling awesome right now, but you know that already, right? So, on with the feedback! First of all, wow. The characters, man. They are so solid that I could basically sit on 'em! They are so alive they are just jumping at me from the screen! Through your phrasing, use of mild swearing words and a very realistic approach (smoking Tavi kicks all kinds of flank. Serious flank, man.), you managed to draw a very real atmosphere that one (i.e. me) can correlate with. So... That's great so far. I'll be sure to keep in touch as I read the following chapters.

P.S. Lucky Tavi doesn't know yet how bad it is to smoke a cigarette and play an instrument at the same time. The ashes burn the polishing sometimes... I know from experience But hey, maybe it only concerns us guitar players! Any way, it's always better to smoke a pipe while you play! Too bad ponies can't stuff those... Can they?!

>>13443191344319

Woo, thanks for the awesome feedback, man! I'm happy to hear you think my characters are so strong! (I tried really hard...)

I am a bit concerned about some things that happen in the next couple chapters... like I'm worried there's some stuff that seems to suddenly come out of no where (as if the authour just suddenly thought up major plot points as they were writing... there's no way that would've happened though ). I'd be interested to hear how you think it flows, here, coming up shortly?

Hmm, I somehow feel like Tavi's probably just borrowing that bass... so taking that into consideration, her need to be smoking may very well outweigh her concern for her instrument... I can see how that would be a problem though! I'm a sax man myself... so smoking while playing would take some sort of magnificent feat far beyond my own capacities! Us horn players have it rough, you know? No smoking while playing, can't drink cus it buggers up the reed and pads (valves for brass)...

Maybe ponies could pack a pipe using... their tongues? There's no way that'd be good for the cake though...

>>13465041346504

Next couple chapters? Next couple chapters?! Now you're my hero! Here I was, weeping that this was going to end way too soon... That's why I prefer to write a small chapter every few days over writing a 10k  chapter once in a month, by the way

As for the next point, if you want something to happen, make it happen. You don't really need a reason why something-or-the-other happens in the story. Find explanations for the characters' actions, but you needn't look for a reason. We, as real people, for one, don't always act according to reason (or common sense).

You poor, poor sax players... *sniff* You'll never know the joy of playing Round Midnight with a pipe hanging from your mouth...

>>13473311347331

Well... a 'final' chapter and then a mostly pointless little epilogue left. (So don't get too excited... though the next chapter's gonna probably definitely be 10k words or more. And the pointless epilogue will probably end up being many thousands of words. I got a lot to say! ...Maybe you've noticed?) Yeah, I suppose writing smaller chapters would make it last longer... but I just somehow ended up with these huge chapters. I have no idea how it happened... smaller chapters seems a thing to try out for my next story, maybe!

Hmm, yeah, that's a good point. I just wish I could have anticipated what I was gonna be bringing in chapter 5 here--with all the sudden but wait, everything's not actually okay!--I would of set it up a bit more in the previous chapters, or something? Or did that work out alright? (I can't really tell...)

>>13476421347642

Well, you see, to be honest, it did work out all right, but... Yeah, those 'but's... -_-

It is highly possible for such a situation to happen in real life; but still, most people (including yours faithfully) don't get torn apart by two diametrically different emotions, such as love and hatred. You see, one emotion always overwhelms the other. For example, if you used to hate someone and fell in love with them afterwards, love will replace hate; and vice versa.

But it's amazing

I hope for a happy ending!

P.S. I've just noticed a Kurt Vonnegut quote on your page. That's, like, extra props, man! /)

Okay, I can't wait for the new chapter so I'm rereading this one

And I have noticed that I may have been wrong in a way; that is, when I assumed that Vinyl wasn't sure of her feelings towards Octavia. Now that I look at it and speculate, it seems to me that she is simply confused by Octavia's actions, and that is not a foundation for changing her general attitude. I mean, she probably loves Tavi, but is really perplexed and obsessed by what may seem like an unimportant fact.

Please do correct me if I'm wrong.

P.S. New chapter? Where are yooooouuu?~

>>14120421412042

Yeah, you basically  got it--Vinyl pretty much loves Tavi still, but the idea is that Vinyl's freaking out because what she'd been dwelling on--and what'd been screwing her up for the last three years--wasn't actually Vinyl's fault at all. She'd thought she'd forced a kiss on Tavi, that'd wrecked their friendship, and's what had driven Tavi away or something. So all that time Vinyl was totally guilty and screwed up (and presumably hadn't had a proper relationship)--for what she now found out was just sort of Tavi's more-or-less completely selfish issues that made almost no sense to Vinyl. Or something. So to Tavi it seems pretty unimportant, but it really has an effect on Vinyl, was what I was thinking.

...I kinda wish I had been thinking more along these lines when I had been writing out the previous chapters, was sort of what I was saying. I would have hinted more that Vinyl had all these issues just below the surface and stuff.

Next chapter's bout 2/3's done! Maybe more! (This whole 'people actually care about the things I do' deal is still rather new to me!) I would say 'real life' is what's slowing me down... but for me, that's art school, majoring in fashion--which really has about the same relevance to the world we live in as fluffy romantic pony fanfiction does. ( ...sorry 'Rare, I didn't mean to imply that either fashion or pony fics are anything less than totally awesome, though!!) ...So I'll say it's my 'other' life which is slowing me down! Anyway, aiming to release for next weekend... if art school doesn't kill me first... (and Celestia knows it tries...)

(In other news, I still totally care about your stuff, I just haven't got to reading it yet because of the amount of aforementioned trying not to die--in regards to my other life--that I've been doing lately!!)

>>14128621412862

Aha! I totally see you point. Now it's all very clear, and I can't help but admit this is a very lively situation. I remeber experiencing the same situation a while ago, and I can relate to being in Vinyl's horseshoes.

This whole 'people actually care about the things I do' deal is still rather new to me

Don't you ever say that! I, for one, care deeply about the continuation of this story, as well as potential future projects (which you shall not think of before you finish this story. *Jedi tricks*)! And I'm sure that there are other people out there which share my point of view.

art school

art school

art school

art school

art school

You... can... DRAW?! *Silently faints in awe*

P.S. (In other news, I still totally care about your stuff, I just haven't got to reading it yet because of the amount of aforementioned trying not to die--in regards to my other life--that I've been doing lately!!)

Hey, that's all right! I mean, you can always read a few chapters in a row later, which, to my mind, is always an awesome experience.

>>14128791412879

Woo, thanks!

Also... I may have already done a bit of writing for future stories while grabbling about and otherwise generally putting off this one...

And yeah! I totally drew the cover for this very fic! And my avy! (I tried to shamelessly plug myself in various places already... so here's another!) Pop by my DevArt sometime! (links under my bio or whatever...)

...Thank you!

(Stick around for an epilogue of sorts!)

Totally adding this to Read Later, even though I said I wouldn't do that anymore.

It looks like it'll be good.

Bravo AcreuBall, simply bravo.

That, was absolutely superb.

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia2.png

saw this a couple weeks ago when there was only a chapter three, glad i found it again

Oh my gosh. Those feels, those feels - why can't I hold them?!

All right, to put it simple, you did a marvellous job here. Really. I've been so... intergrated in the story, if integrated is the word I want, that it was really hard to tell reality from the tale. I mean, I've probably never felt so involved before, able to relate to the characters and their feelings. Your style and truly infinite vocabulary will never cease to amaze me. The way you portrayed Tavi and Vinyl is so beliveable that there aren't enough words to express how real it is.

This chapter topped it all perfectly. Call me cheesy or whatever, but when I read the passage about Vinyl and Tavi forgetting about the past and letting themselves simply carry on, embracing teir mutual feelings, I really nearly shed a tear - and a happy one at it. It all ended as it should have ended, and for that I owe you my deepest gratitude. Your talent is truly outstanding, and your achievement in dishing out such a perfect story is immense. I wish I could write like you, but hey, there's no room for two writers of such calibre in VinylTavi shipping land, and I let you be the ruler here gladly

This fic was a great source of inspiration for me, and evoked many a memory. It's been a perfectly pleasant experience to read this with a glass of whisky in my hand and a pipe in my mouth. And you know what? I'm not going to re-read this. Why, you may ask? Because I know it will never be the same.  Such sunlit-ly brightened perfection can't be relived. But I will forever remember the first time I've read your story, and all the feelings it has awoken.

Thank you for writing this. You are amazing, and I sure as hell will be looking forward to the epilogue.

~Your faithful admirer, Josh

Full circle. Nice, very nice.

I normally don't read Octavia and Vinyl fics,

but I can't pass up good jazz.

Great, my only only real problem is that I can't stand hectic jazz like that...had to replace it with slightly less all-over-the-place prog rock (so that it still fit the mood)

I can't seem to find an emoticon that suits my feelings towards this fic...