"Well howdy do!" a strange western pony greeted me with a big shake.
"Name's Apple Picker! Welcome to Equestria's fresh new start, New Appleloosa!"
First things first, it wasn't very fresh. It also looked pretty old.
She started again before I could get a word in edgewise. "Due to lack of trees, New Appleloosa is completely made out of stage cars. I'll give you the tour!"
"That's alright," I said but half of my response was covered be squeals of excitement from the earth pony.
She started to drag me along as she pointed out stuff. "Those are the main gates, or should I say, mane gates!" she giggled then continued through the rest of the city. I would tell you about it, but I lost all focus in the tour. The only reason I moved from spot to spot was because she put me on a chariot.
"And here," she smiled brighter than before. "Is what I like to call 'The Grand Exchange'."
The yellow mare pulled me into it with a harder grip than before. "This is our trusty sale pony, Ditzy Doo!"
The gray Pegasus heard her name and gave a grin. But that wasn't any normal pony.
It was a ghoul pegasus.
"You do realize she's undead, right?" I wasn't sure if my tour guide was blind, or crazy. Or maybe both.
"She's harmless," Apple Picker shrugged it off. And we kept going on our tour.
I stayed in their city for about a week before leaving.
The day before I left I received a radio message while lounging around with some new friends in a bar.
"Everyone quiet!" the tender yelled. He turned up the radio.
"This is Apple Pie, I'm looking for a stallion named Spark. He's a light tan earth pony. If you see him, meet me at the Bannered Mare, in the heart of Sweet Apple Acres."
There was a long awkward silence. I got off my pillow cushion and broke the deadly quietness. "Well, you are all real fun ponies, but I must be off before I'm horribly missed."
I started walking slowly through the door then realized.
I never payed the bartender.
Normally this wouldn't be too much of a problem, but I scarcely remember my eccentric tour guide saying something about this particular tender.
"Being in the wasteland makes ponies lose trust in ponies. If you don't pay that bartender, he'll go ballistic."
I started nervously trotting away. But I felt a little relieved.
My new buddies will pay for me.
"Get back here, thief!"
What friends I've made.
I galloped towards the train station to look for my specially made to be automatic train
It was in the front, ready to be used.
I hopped in and turned it on. Out the corner of my eye, I could see the citizens coming towards the train as it started.
I shoveled coal faster and faster as it started up and quickly started moving up the track.
Somepony was on top of my train.
"You won't get away, thief!"
I turned to see the bar pony with a butcher knife in his mouth.
I reached for my gun.
All my weapons were in the luxury cart.
The gruff stallion charged at me. He started to pull back for a deadly blow.
He swung down the knife at me. I jumped backwards to avoid it then through a buck his direction. I nailed him square in the jaw, forcing him to drop the knife from his mouth.
I put the knife in the attachment slot on my helmet (Which I put on when I started the train( and also left my helmet on the lever to start up the engine)).
I put the knife close to him. "I don't want to do this anymore than you."
"Just pay me."
"Are you crazy? Who's on top here, me, or you?"
"Why would I pay you after you tried to kill me?"
"Because I would rob your worthless hide, you piece of-"
My (or his) knife swung right through his Neck like it was made out of soft snow.
The rest of the ride was rather quiet, except for the occasional bump on the rails.
But along the way, the train just stopped.
I went up to the front to check what the problem was.