(Bonus) The twelfth attempt: Stringer
(200 years post Celestia)
Dream big, Stringer’s mother had taught her. She’d been one of the most successful con mares in Equestria, grifting her way from city to city. Shed amassed fortune and treasure galore, and none of her victims were any the wiser. Everypony, she’d said, could be a sucker if you just played them right – and she was always able to prove it.
She’d passed away a few years back, but Stringer had done her best to continue the family tradition. Blessed with a talent that made her a sort of jack-of-all-trades, she was able to demonstrate all kinds of skills to convince ponies to part with their hard-earned bits. She could cook just well enough to trick nobles into thinking she was a famous chef; she could march just well enough to look like an angry guard that it would better to bribe than to argue with; she could juggle, sing, even walk on her two front hooves. She wasn’t great at anything, except, perhaps, for talking, but that was really all she needed.
“String ‘em along,” her mother had taught her. “Until you’ve got all they have.” And she did.
But this scam would have impressed even her old mare – and that mare had once conned a title, not just wealth but a title, out of a keen-eyed archduchess with more paranoia than rooms in her castle. This would be the scam, the titanic one that would rocket her straight to the top. This was it, baby. The legendary con.
The scene? Canterlot Royal Auditorium. The plan? Play the Symphony for Moon and Sun. Not well, of course, but who would know the difference? Nopony had heard the piece played in many, many years, and none ever spoke of the old performance anyway. Hay, the fifth movement was forgotten, so who was to say it wasn’t mostly a series of glitzy, flashy, and speedy arpeggiations (the sort that sounded a lot harder to play than they really were) around the previous themes? The foolish nobles had no idea what it was supposed to sound like. As long as she didn’t screech her way through it, they’d trust she was playing it right. Luna might know the difference, but then again, Luna wouldn’t be there. Luna, Stringer knew, was abroad in diplomatic talks. She would miss the concert.
The key to the con, though, was ensuring that the other ponies forgot that.
Costume Artist was a very talented actress whom Stringer worked with occasionally, but even the seasoned con artist had to admit that Costume had outdone herself this time. Her Luna costume was absolutely perfect. She looked just like the Princess of the Night, and could act like her too. She would fool them all.
Stringer would take the stage. ‘Luna’ would arrive, in an unexpected appearance – she’d rushed home from her diplomatic duties, she’d say, just to hear this piece -- , and Stringer would play. ‘Luna’ would love it. In fact, it would completely floor her. She would pronounce Stringer the greatest musician in Equestria, bar none. And, given her great love of music, that would imply that nobles who utilized the services of so great a musician might just look a bit better than those philistines who did without.
And that would open so many doors…
The Longest Night Ceremony was in a month. Once Luna favored her, all the nobles would beg her to play for them at that ceremony, in their own domains and fiefdoms. She’d entertain all offers. Hay, she’d accept all offers – as long as they paid in advance. She could make that demand; each noble would know that, if they turned her down, another would snap her up. They would never tell each other that they’d bought her because they’d each worry about their colleagues stealing her away; this would help ensure that they didn’t realize that she was selling the same performance to sixty-odd nobles. Although, why stop at just the one concert? Plenty would want to sign her for long-term contracts too. And… as long as they had plenty of money… she would gladly accept.
She would make tens of thousands of bits. Even splitting it with Costume, she’d be beyond rich. Sure, it would fall apart once Luna returned in a week or two, but by then the two of them would have cashed out and hidden in their safe house in Cavallia, where they could enjoy a life of anonymous prosperity.
But that would be later. For now, she had to sell the con.
Stringer stepped onto the stage just as the fake Luna finished stating how, though she was so busy, she just had to come back and listen to the mare with the temerity to play this piece. ”THIS PIECE DESCRIBES MYSELF AND MINE SISTER. SHOULD THERE BE EVEN ONE SINGLE FLAW, I SHALT NEVER FORGIVE THE ARTIST. PLAY IT, STRINGER… IF THOU CANST!”
Stringer pretended to be afraid. “I – I obey, your majesty!”
She hefted her bow, drew it across the instrument, and –
And suddenly, she felt very cold.
Involuntarily, she looked out at the audience – and she saw a rapidly expanding patch of dark blue.
No! No, no, no! Impossible!
There was a flash, there was a titanic, roiling boom, and then there was Luna. And Stringer suddenly understood why ponies once feared the night.
Costume Artist took one look at the alicorn and tried to bolt, but she seemed to run into some kind of invisible wall. With a flash, her fake wings evaporated, her mist turned to dust, and even her fine vestments crumbled. “Please, stop! Don’t hurt me!”
“Take her away,” hissed Luna.
And then, as Costume Artist was being hauled out by the guards, Luna turned her gaze on Stringer. Her eyes were like thin needles of ice pointing directly at her.
“I have come,” said Luna, in a very angry voice, “A long way to hear this piece. Play it, Stringer. If thou canst.”
And she couldn’t.
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Gee, I wonder why this idea didn't work.
Headcanon for what happened next: Costume Artist was offered a choice between a long stint in the Shadowbolts spies, for her ability to make disguises, and a long stint in prison. She took the former. Stringer was offered a long stint in prison for trying to defraud all the nobles, or a long stint in space for messing with Luna like that. She also took the former. (Addendum: she may have been pardoned later, on the condition that she never returned to Equestria).
Running tab of things that don't work with this piece:
1. Ending that's all about strength.
2. Ending that's all about cleverness.
3. Ending that's all about being flashy.
4. Hoping Luna doesn't show up.
984885: Well, she's not actually sabotaging them. She's just saying that she no longer wants to hear them, and that she/her government won't fund their concerts. That no other pony will hire them afterwards really isn't her fault, and sure, she could say something, but usually by that point she's so disgusted that she doesn't want to go out of her way to save them from themselves.
(By the way, we are going to see one or two musicians whom Luna is a bit gentler on. One of them, it's not really her fault that things went horribly wrong. Another is... more complicated).
I have not yet finished reading this chapter. I just want to pause here and say that I think I see where this is going, and I feel really, really bad for Stringer right now.
EDIT
Huh. Okay, not actually the way I thought it would go, but I like this just as well. I was expecting to find that Luna *had* come in the beginning, and Stringer didn't notice that it wasn't Costume until it was too late.
"Mine" should be "my," (again, "mine" and "thine" are used like "an,") and "shalt" should be "shall" (in general, -st is for "thou" and -th for "he/she/it," everything else is conjugated as in modern English). I guess it's probable that since this is Costume, and not Luna, he's just not speaking Royal Canterlot Equestrian correctly, but on the other hoof I think a master of disguise like Costume should probably be able to duplicate it, since voice and mannerisms are as much a part of a disguise as any costume.
986495: That... sounds about right for both of them.
Greengrass: "Notary, I don't even know what half of these acts are."
Notary: "Then it won't be any trouble for you to agree not to do them, will it?"
Greengrass: "...how do you know what they are?"
Notary: "I think we'll both be happier if we don't get into that."
986502: Well, he is trying to basically cheat his way into wealth with the whole fake-Luna thing. I don't feel too bad for him, is what I'm saying. :-)
986516: Given her reactions to the piece being performed badly, he doesn't think she'd go that far to fake liking it. He thinks that Luna might just simply say nothing or not openly shun Octavia at best, and that would be a big departure from the historical way she's reacted, to the point where it might be noticable.
986516
At this point, the piece has been attempted and failed so many times that ponies probably don't even consider the possibility of Luna genuinely liking it.
986555: That too. At this point, even if she somehow did like it, they might not believe her unless she did something rather dramatic... :-)
986502 986514
Honestly, I feel rather sorry for Stringer too. Such an ambitious scam, only to see it all fall completely apart right at the last minute. Also, I'd hope String wouldn't have served much actual jail time. A fortune in defraudment may have been planned, but none had yet been enacted, even if Costume confessed the whole scheme, Stringer could still deny the bulk of it. A good exile (not into space) would seem the best 'punishment', and hopefully put String out of reach of most of those nobles that might be interested in getting some payback for the plot.
986566: That works too, then. Although I can sympathize with Luna's anger too. Stringer is basically taking Luna's tragic past and the most horrific time in her life and appropriating it for a scam. I think she would probably be fairly angry about that. And we've learned from the Cadenza fic how she is to scam artists when she's angry, especially when the scam relates to the Sola/Luna sisters.
986555 986562
Meh, I suppose so, it's far too brief a bit, and could even just be dismissed as a miscalculation on his part. This isn't the kind of hang up I'll let ruin my enjoyment.
986584
That is true, and certainly why Stringer would get presented with such radical choices to begin with. I'd just like to think that after a few weeks or so Luna would calm down a bit and quietly pardon the con-artist on stipulation of leaving the nation and never returning.
986610: Quite possible. She'd get to go to Cavallia after all! Albeit without the fortune she'd wanted.
986620
A note. In the comments you've been referring to Stringer as a he fairly often, but in the chapter above, Stringer is a she.
986654: Fixed the last comment. I think the others are okay; the male pronouns at the top comment on this page refer to Greengrass. Thanks for catching that.
Wow. It never occured to me that a pony would be so STUPID as to try something like that.
Well, I don't especially feel all that sorry for Stringer. She bet against Luna and lost. My guess is that WHEN Octy plays the theme aright and Greengrass opens his fat mouth, he'll be known as the new Stringer.
You weren't lying when you said that the next would be even less sympathetic, though I must admit that I do feel for her when she realises how badly this will go. Still, even if Luna didn't show up, this wasn't likely to work. All Luna has to say is, "I wasn't there." She might have even requested a repeat performance.
Glad that we're going to be getting some variety in the way the pice is played and Luna's reaction though.
I do think that Luna isn't going to appreciate any insinuation that Celestia was defeated du to being her inferior is some way. Or anything that removes the sense of tragedy and the fact that Luna really cared about her and didn't want to have to fight her in the first place.
986452
Actually, I'd say that #3 is 'Throw together something that sounds impressive and pray nopony notices'
987005: A repeat performance wouldn't catch her; Stringer's whole plan was to do it once, scam all the nobles, and flee the country and go into hiding before Luna came back. If Luna hadn't returned for at least, say, four days, it stood a good chance of working. But unfortunately, Luna was a bit more on the ball.
Interesting thoughts about the 'correct' performance. Stay tuned!
989273: I could see that, but they'd be much too professional to go any further. They'd both know of the numerous problems that could happen if they actually started dating.
988945: Yep. :-)
986562
Mmm... tastes like foreshadowing...
I'm really enjoying this.
And I don't feel sorry for Stringer at all.
Ooh, that was just plain stupid. I don't feel sorry, not in the least.
Well, it was ballsy. Cactus-to-crotch levels of indescribable stupidity, but ballsy.
Costume Artist probebly ended up in Luna's Sculpture Gardenas as a permenant resident.
Wow, that is ballsy Stringer, that is one hell of a con, if you had pulled it off, then hats off, even though you failed the sheer amount of balls you had to try to pull of this big a con, wow, balls of steel Stringer, balls of steel. You still failed though, so,
2000994
Nah! That's old Celestia's favorite hobby [as seen that she doesn't think twice of Salamander's use petrification magic on her little ponies]. Luna would probably hold a "trial", and then banish her from Equestria so hard her her body breaks the sound barrier, twice.
Welp, you're bucked. HAVE FUN IN JAIL, BITCH.
I wouln't worry guys, Stringer did break out, and her descendants are still alive to this very day. "Oh we got oppertunity in thi her community!"
What is well doen with thee lashbacks is that it serves to deliever some great momentum to the big finale. We are seeing all of the errors an mistakes, the differnt interpitations of the same piece. With each failure we are given more and more of a reason to worry for our Cellesit and how she might fail.
Again, I have to wonder if you have a history with musical theory because all of thse terms, while not distracting, are very adcvance for me to understand. While I can see the piece, the defintiion are things I don't see (although it should be mention that everytime you mention Cadence I am thinking alicorn) It is quite the work that you are putting in.
A tragic case of ambition eclipsing skill.
I wonder why it makes think about Greengrass...