"Every time these jokers get knocked out by a flailing unicorn or decide the best plan against a magic-sucking centaur is to fly towards his mouth, I'm the one who makes them look good anyway."
Publicity Stunt is the head of the Wonderbolts PR division. Her job isn't glamorous, or even easy, but it is one she is proud of. And once a week she gets to catch up Equestria's most famous flyers on rumors and news about them that show just how wild an imagination ponies can have.
An entry to Aragon's Comedy (Is Serious Business) Contest with the prompt "We Learned Something Newsworthy" and Manaphy's Wonderful Wonderbolts Contest.
Inspired by and the (unofficial) sequel to FanOfMostEverything's Team Cohesion.
Preread by GPizano and FOME himself.
Edit: Thanks to your efforts this story has now surpassed its rival. Huzzah!
Oh dear god... I pity poor Publicity with the shit she has to put up with...
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This is the life she chose. It was probably an uninformed choice, but not everypony can grow up in Ponyville where that level of insanity is normal.
Started out a little rough compared to the original, but the last half was spectacular! It's always so cathartic to see the tabloids called out on their horseapples. Rainbow Dash definitely earned her spot in the Wonderbolts. Rainbow Dash IS Best Wonderbolt.
That Rainbow look must be both feared and revered in the 'bolts, for there's few things more entertaining or sanity wrecking than ponyville shenanigans.
This was a fun little read. I really feel you could make a longer multi part fic out of the theme of the Wonderbolts dealing with the press, lots of potential for drama, soul searching and/or comedy.
Also, the 'this really dumb concept is actually real' face is now a thing. I don't care what canon says.
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There is also few things more Ponyville-wrecking than Ponyville shenanigans, which is why Cloudsdale usually takes the scenic route around the other side of the Canterhorn instead of traveling right over that town.
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There could be sequels, but I feel they would lose quality rather quickly if it's just more of these kinds of jokes. Maybe someday when I've collected some more good ones there might be a bonus chapter, but no promises.
Instead I recommend reading the story this was inspired by and based on, if you haven't already. And then I recommend reading the rest of FOME's short stories because every one of them is brilliant.
Accurate. Twin hoof seal of approval, this was great. :)
This was quite enjoyable.
Glad I could help with this. Thanks for a fantastic spiritual sequel, and best of luck in both contests.
So, uh, minor syntax criticism here: the way "respectively" works is, it links things in pairs. A and B are X and Y, respectively. Twice here, though, you've given us an X and Y without a corresponding "A and B". Publicity Stunt's parents are a superintendent and a mayor, but which is which?
On a lighter note, I liked " Sunny Skies, entirely regular pegasus" and Rainbow's "this really dumb concept is actually real" face.
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Glad to hear that, and thank you all for the kind words.
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It doesn't really matter for the story, or the joke. I haven't really assigned either, so feel free to make up your own backstories for Pub's parents.
VERY well done.. Thats the way to handle the press and their muck raking
a story about fake news obviously written by someone with no journalism experience or any research on the topic
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I'll have you know that I did quite extensive research on the journalistic practices of Equestrian tabloids as per the headcanon of the story this one was based on.
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like how the writer of Bright reasarched race relations in fantasy settings
yeah fucking right
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I mean... it's just one fantasy setting in this case and only about 2k words long. I'll admit that made research on it a fair deal easier.
8725820 Trump 2048!
Good story, and it corrected a misconception for me; I thought nepotism only referred to family, not friends as well.
This is a really damn funny story.
Quite a fun little story.
I really like Misty's teasing Soarin about being a filly. 
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Glad to hear~
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No, no, you had it right. I just couldn't find the correct word when I was writing this story.
Turns out it's "cronyism". Might correct that, but cronyism just doesn't have the same ring to it...
(Then again, I wouldn't put it past the tabloids to use the wrong terminology either)
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technically it's called "cronyism" when it's friends, not family, but it's not a distinction that usually matters
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Wonder what that's about...
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For some reason, when I looked it up the definition at the top included friends.
My only real issue with the story is the notations. They are entertaining, but having them interrupt the story kind of breaks the flow of it.
My two favorite lines however were:
and:
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Shut the fuck up.
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Glad to hear that. And yeah, that first one especially was one of my favorite lines, too.
Sorry to hear about the notations... The general opinion of my prereaders was that this way was better than having them all in the author's notes though. That would have been even more disruptive, I think.
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Thanks guys, but it's fine. He didn't downvote the story for it, far as I could tell, and his grievances were amusing to read and reply to. And isn't this what this story is about, really?
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Yeah. I will concede that it is a problem in a format like this. Having it at the bottom would require the reader to mark where they were and scroll down to the bottom, which would have the same problem of breaking the flow. I suppose that in this context, the method use is the better choice.
Okay this story was GREAT!
Also: That ending was just AMAZING!! I have GOT to remember this joke!! <3
Best. Thing. Ever.
i.pinimg.com/originals/cf/1d/56/cf1d56f068e6381e352d29add14d48ed.jpg
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Thank you. Always glad to hear it's well received.
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"CELESTIA DAMN IT, MISTY!"
I know I might be in the minority here, but I actually really enjoy footnote humor when it’s done well. And you have more than exceeded that mark.
I loved this look at the Wonderbolts’ bad publicity and appreciated the irony of the fact that some of these headlines sound like actual crazy fan theories. Good work!
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You and every Pratchett fan do, at the very least.
Thank you for the comment. I'm glad to hear you enjoyed it.
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Haven’t actually read Prachett. Thanks for letting me know he does that and hence putting him higher on my reading list.
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He's a great author. If you want an idea of what his books are like, this story as well as anything GhostOfHeraclitus writes are inspired by him and pretty close to his style.
Good story. I love the Wonderbolts :)
Great. The cutaways made me think of the narrator from Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy
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It was actually inspired by the Discworld novels, but I certainly won't object to being compared to another milestone of comedy literature.
Celestia needs to step in and deal with the press like a proper tyrant!
"I AM THE SUN GODDESS, PEONS!! I AM ETERNAL!! AND IF I WANT TO MAKE MY HORSE A SENATOR, I WILL BUCKING DO IT AND WHOEVER QUESTIONS MY AUTHORITAW WILL BE GETTING AT ALL-EXPENSES PAID ONE-WAY TRIP TO DA MOOOOOOOOOON!!" She turned to Dash, "You are now a senator, small horse person."
Dash blinked, "Neigh?"
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Don't you mean se-neigh-tor?
I love both press room humor and footnote commentary, plus the story had me in stitches, so you totally win. Also, I agree with your prereaders: having sections in the text for the footnotes is definitely the right way to go about it. And I loved all the little references.
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Glad to hear you liked it.
And thank you for the comment. It's always nice to hear these things from a reader.
I don't have much to add. I read FOME's original and this one back to back, and I must say, they are both quite funny. A welcome editing to my "Good Reads" folder-- and I might just go back and re-read this story right away.
And I almost never do that.
Rainbow Dash, second-in-command of the Wonderbolts. I think the tabloids have a point; I think she's not qualified. Dash is young, and her immaturity can get the best of her. She's got some growing up to do.
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The story does play a bit into the future compared to the show, but that aside, it's not like she's expected to run a company. They have ponies like Pub for all the legal, technical and financial stuff. What she needs to be good at is flying and leading a team and she's got years of experience in both.
Amusing, though I WAS hoping to see how Publicity Stunt spun that Tirek debacle. I don't know how to do so but I was kinda hoping the author would. :P