Greetings all. Need a proof reader and Editor please.

Oh- Be brutal and honest. This is my first rodeo.

Oh man, put in all the ideas in a blender and make a smoothie out of it? Let's see what we got...

>>926695926695 About 500 dollars in damage liabilities.

>>916346916346 >>926714926714 Thanks Ignorable, I needed a chuckle

This chapter was... unsatisfying. Not to say anything was particularly wrong with it, it just... didn't have much happening in it. The appearance of The Doctor and how he was able to read the mind of Spike threw a red flag in my direction, although... if this spell is failing, would this be the part where he becomes Doctor Whooves?

The only major glaring issue I could see is that...

'Well, the spell Twilight is using is indeed a summon spell. To summon a Time Lord...'

----------

'Well... Twilight did say that it was a lot like a spell it had casted before. According to her, it was a lot like a summon..." Spike said, moving a tiny claw rub his chin.

"Ha! I knew it. Twilight is using the basis of that spell as a foundation for this one. Either she was wanted efficiency and little magic spent," Doctor said as he turned to look back at Twilight.'

Do you see it? The Doctor is being summoned with a spell and apparently that's the problem! ILLOGICAL! DELETE! DELETE!

Sorry, went a little Cyberpony crazy for a moment. And also sorry for the long ridiculous comment, but this is going to need MAJOR overhaul by not an editor, but a good dose of common sense.

Um... Deadpool? Take it away.

Image: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/c/ca/Deadpool.png/178px-Deadpool.png

"Time for another addition of, 'Deadpool Helps'. So, we got this HUGE crossover fic, full of characters that have nothing to do with one another. What's wrong with it? It's trying to be funny, and it thinks it's hilarious. Comedy is always tough to master, not for me though, I'm hilarious. Regardless, you should try to scale down the humor and try to get this huge fic to work."

Well. I can see many things that could be fixed. I can edit but if I get a request from the previous people who ask I will push you back.

By the way. I can see that this is going to be tough for you to write. All I'm going to say is keep going till You want to stop and not because of others. This could be great just keep working on it.

Thank you all very much for your comments. I am learning a lot, and you all make a lot of sense too. Rest assured, I will finish this, no matter how good or bad it turns out.

>>927729927729 Keepin' my eye on you then, let's see what you got in that head of yours!

The only character that I know of is Dovakhiin, I don't know shit about the others. Can someone please fill me in with the basic stuff about the others?

They are all going to do formal introductions, but citing where they are from may be good.

Phoenix Wright is from Capcom's Ace Attorney series. Its a mystery/visual novel game series. He is also one of the fighters in Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3.

Soma Cruz is from several of Konami's Castlevania handheld game library. He is also a playable character in the xbox 360/ ps3 downloadable game, Harmony of Despair

Dovahkiin is from Bethsaida's Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim.

Dan is from the Hub's cartoon lineup. You know, same place that makes mlp, fim? The name of his show is Dan Vs.

All of my favorite people in one story! AND it's well written!

My guess on who get's to Twi's place are in this order.

Dan

Wright

Donvakiin

Soma.

And Dan will likely insult Phoenix's suit and job and say something like, "I hate lawyers, I hate this place, I HATE EVERYTHING! Except my cat, Mr. Mumbles.'

List of people I know/dont know in this story

Dan: Nope

Wright: Eyup

Dovakiin: Eyup

Soma: Nope

I will most likely be VERY confused because of this...

Need Chapter 4, they must meet. Especially Mr. Wright and Dan.

This takes place after Mr. Wright's last case. Good to know. And Kristoph Gavin is the worst man on earth.

>>948263948263

>>948263948263

I 'd at the adventure time refrence. Soma quoting Marcaline's dad... LOL

It's a pretty good idea, even though there's a bunch of spelling errors.

Also, there's a lot of "I am" and stuff where there should probably be, "I'm".  It feels a bit awkward. To me, anyway.

I am glad people like the story so far. And I've noticed after reading back there are errors here and there. I still need to find a proofreader, as English is not my first language.

Also, you okay there white?

You spelled filly wrong its not Philly it's Filly

Do not mess With the fucking lawyer for he is Phoenix wright

Okay, this is actually kind of cool. It's a mess, yes, but cool none the less. I know all of the characters involved (I HATED SYMPHONY OF THE NIGHT, THOUGH). So, you have Nathan Drake (PS series), Phoenix Wright (Nintendo handheld), Dovahkiin (PC gaming, as that is where the series originates). Soma (Nintendo/PlayStation), Dan (TV series), The Doctor (again. TV Series). To balance it out (if you want to do that), add a ps series, two xbox ones, and a pc series (TF2 always seems to work in these cases)

Now, when i say mess, i mean it's all over the place. There is no concrete plot at the moment, and any plot there is is just shoved in your face. I read another fic similar to this in the fact that they had characters from different places interacting with one another. It's in my favorites and its name escapes me, but that had a concrete plot, a very nice build up, and a resolute ending that was rather satisfying, in a sense. This is very stutter-y and jumpy, going from character to character, and occasionally the character is not even in character (phoenix wright is rather tricky to write about, though...). You kind of introduced the plot a bit too quickly without giving enough of a setting, and characters are introduced somewhat strangely. You have good grammar and sentence structure for someone who has this as a second language, so that is good.It is fun to drop a reference from time to time, but don't let that be your main staple of comedy. The MvC3 thing was fun, but it's not really phoenix Wright. He is a bit awkward, somewhat introverted at times and really cares about his loved ones. He second guesses a lot, and is never really sure about anything, unless he has an absolute understanding of whats going on. He has a stone cold poker face from his time in the courtroom, and has been shown to be extremely lucky and take a beating. If that scene were to work, he would be more like 'oh god i hope this works... "HOLD IT!" they stop 'I cant believe that actually worked! that would be more in character for him.

bleh. i could say more, but i really have to sleep. goodbye and good luck with your story. It's not great, but it's not bad. Hope this helps!

Ahem, I would like more good comrade...

UMVC3 B*******, Ho-AH! Also, How many people got that Hero 108 reference?

>>964602964602

I honestly didn't think anyone else would get the Hero 108 reference.

Good chapter.

Yum, MEAT! Dan found meat before, he can do it again, the humans can feast!

...Fluttershy has a thang for predators...huh...

Good chapter my friend!

Fluttershy attracted to meat-eaters?

Thats so... clever! I never would have thought of that.

HAAAAAAMMMM!!!!!

very nice sir very nice

And this just shows. DON'T MESS WITH PHOENIX WRIGHT PEOPLE.

Mother of god. DONT EAT THE MEAT. ITS A TRAP

Ok so it is safe to say that Pinkie has gone off the deep end....again.

Oh lawrd and the circle of shipping beggins

WTF PINKIE sorry white: dang right pinkie wanna watch youtube channnelsyes:mkay

Image: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7hepdpbll1rs17hoo1_500.gif

Damn relatable...

Oh dang. This is about to get a lot more interesting all up in this story. Also at least Pinkie has the guts to admit her feelings unlike all the others.

Oh god man. You had me laughing for 3/4's of the chapter. Good job man. Also I love how the have all turned into Bronies. Very nice.

>>980575980575 yes he managed to turn Dan, soma, Nathan drake, the dragon born and the most badass of all phoenix  wright into bronys

Only one problem with Nathan Drake. With what you described I thought it to be Chuck Norris. And i cant wait to see who this is going to be.

Fear the mighty Bat-Ape

Image: http://images.wikia.com/marvel_dc/images/5/5a/Bat-Ape_BTBATB_01.png

>>983140983140 OH F***!!!

Metal Gear Solid.

What was wrong with summoning Snake. Snake is cool.

>>989527989527

With Octacon there, maybe a surprise entrance by the man with the eye-patch.

You guys may not be all that far off... Then again...

If you add anymore awesome characters, I might blackout from happiness...