Poor poor, Gilda. She's an antisue in a less then forgiving environment.

I love your story, you have your portrayal of her spot on.

I caught a few issues with the flow of the chapter, but looking back I can;t tell where they were.

Keep writing?

this is good :)

im always in for some gilda make up time ^^

one word. Awesome!

This is epic

It's good. Some passages could use a little bit more description, but not too much more.

Another gilda redemption fic, gee this is like what, the forty one i read today, get new material HACK!

Other than the fact that the chapter is misnamed, I'm liking this.

I love your interpretation of Gilda

This is looking pretty awesome so far

You know, I was suspecting her to be transformed by Celestia in order to be taught a lesson, but accidental spell misfire from Twilight works just as well. Great job.

nice way to combine twilight messing up a spell and gilda attempting to be less nasty . hope to see more from this story in a little while.

Thanks all for the supportive comments. I'm glad people could enjoy it from a personal first person view of Gilda

I'm hoping this story can stay entertaining while balancing sympathy and tough character development for Gilda. I'll have a few curve balls thrown in coming up. I'm hoping to pleasantly surprise you all!

I was curious when I read the description, but that pic makes me want to read this! Here goes.

wow, nice story, keep it up

(sorry for the lame-o response, I'm pressed for time)

“Eeeyaahhh!”

Before I knew it, I accidentally let out my eagle screech.

Little error there. Eagles do not screech. They are physically incapable of doing so.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NlBzKYbEY-k

They make sounds like this, so the quote should say:

"Huuuuueweh! Huuuuuueweh!”

Before I knew it, I accidentally let out my eagle screech.

Alternatively, a lion's roar would also work.

i have to ask how that cover art was made, as it looks like it was made using the pony creator, but i didn't think it had that head design

Intriguing. Aside from the wrong homophone*, this is an excellent introductory chapter. Even someone who's never seen her episode should have a firm grasp on Gilda's nature by reading this. I look forward to seeing the soon to be ex-griffon adjust to the change in species.

Aside from the nitpicking footnote, my only complaint is that the chapter title rather spoils what's going to happen. Yes, the title and summary do as well, but I can't help but feel that there could be a better choice for the chapter itself. Not sure what it is, though...

*"You're" is a contraction of you are. The word you were looking for is "your".

>>5166051660 The sound effect was taken from directly from the Gilda episode.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzT4xbuL8TM&feature=player_detailpage#t=1202s

Right after she closes the door, the screech can be heard. Being technically incorrect on this small issue is fine by me as long as I stay with cannon elements. The lion's roar will definitely come into play later on, so no worries there.

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very very good beginning i will watch this

how often will you add chapters?

>>5197451974 SPAM!

...Go on...

I am intrigued.  

Gilda is dead, the end!

Great story, five stars.

>>5197451974

Im sorry bot/sir, i am not at all interested in jerseys offers.

Btw, good story. Nice characterization.

and a spike

OK, this Idea I really like, a lot, I can tell this is going to be a fun read,

The only thing I don't care for is the first person. I find it rather irritating to read. But I am going to read this ether way.

Good work!

I wonder what Twilight spell was "meant" to do.  and if She will be happy that she made a new spell, even  if it was by mistake LOL.

I wonder if Pony Gilda will want to join the Wonderbolts Now LOL.

GILLLLLLLLLLLLLDAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

I always enjoy a story with Gilda, or Spike, or AJ, or Mac, or any number of other ponies/non-ponies in it.

More Gilda, if you would, my dear Author.

Plan Redemption is a go!

Cue next chapter....soon?

To be honest, I forgot the title of the chapter while I was reading, so when I got to the end, I was honestly thinking that Twilight was trying to hurt Gilda...but, apparently, I know what's gonna happen. Anyway, this was pretty nice. Again, I hate first person stories, but again I find myself not being able to hate this one. Gilda stories where she tries to apologize and make amends are always cute, and I can't wait to see where this one goes. There were errors scattered about, but nothing glaring. Keep it up!

I find that pic of Gilda as a pony... very sexy...

>>5252452524 I think that she looks like a Chibi

>>5252452524

you're fucking sick you know

go masturbate to sweetie belle's marshmallow butthole

btw this is cool as far as i know, some grammar errors here and there

you typed apart instead of a part

and some others i forgot

"She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me, She's gunna kill me."

What Twilight is thinking.

>>5258052580 ¿Lo siento? That is Marine Marksman you're talking to... He can what ever he fing wants!

'Sides Gilda is hawt...

Gilda, was she that tank in the second platoon, first battalion of the US recon rangers? If so she's dead, a Javelin missle destroyed everything inside.

Lol just joking.

One word.

MOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR.

Intersting idea for a storyline. I must say you did a great job capturing Gilda's emotions over the ordeal.

Please I do wish encourage you to keep up the good work upon such a great idea like this one.

Well, considering the picture, I'm going to have to guess the spell was probably going to be used on Spike, seeing as he'd be the only other recipient of a species change spell.

Hey all, I'm going to rename the first chapter. It was to be a pull for readers, but I realized that it doesn't capture the message of the story thus far. And besides that, its redundant since the image gives it away

I'm working to make the second chapter longer than the first, so I don't expect to have it up until tomorrow or Wednesday. I'm also attempting to increase the quality of the story, so keep that feedback coming in. I really appreciate it

>>5107351073

People make a lot of them because it's a concept people enjoy. Prick.

>>5280352803 Ha HA ha >>5252452524 How do you always beat me to the good ones ive read 30 chapters to day and wow if you weren't in a bunch of them

>>5171451714

That's actually a stock sound used by many things. I think it's a red-tailed hawk, though I'd have to re-check.

Guess who to blame for the whole "hawk sounds for all raptors" thing? Fuggin' Disney. Is there anything they won't muck up?

Love Gilda fics, looking forwards to more!

I've got, like, six alerts about update and no new chapter. WAT

Same problem as gapaot

good story though

What's with the site sayuing it updated? I can't  find any differences....or maybe I'm unobservant.

Chapter got a new title, is all.

Second chapter is up, but I stopped it a bit shorter than I first intended. When I wrote and edited up to this point, I thought it would be more appropriate to leave off here. The next part will contain a lot of dialogue, and I don't consider myself too good at that

So I'm going to need some time to plan it out and make sure it sounds genuine to each character. As always, I hope you guys enjoy the story thus far.

New chapter = EPIC!!!

Oh, I can't wait for more. I want to see how Gilda reacts to her new body.

Also, pinkiepie....

Odd....

I voted five stars, and the over all rating went down by .1 point. I'm serious, by the way (Or maybe I'm not)

Great story, by the way...

>>5581055810

And I'm with you with dialogue. I wish you luck, and inspiration, and, well, skill. Can't wait for the next chapter.

I WANT MOAR XD

First off, I have really enjoyed these first two chapters. Second take your time with the third chapter, I enjoy your writing style, love how you describe stuff, I wish I was that good and I know how difficult conversations here, hence why I kept them to a minimum in my first chapters of my two stories.

Anyways Tricky-step I wish you the best of luck with the next chapter, I'll be looking out for more stories from you in future

Ha ha! The drama, it builds! Pony!Gilda should be deliciously awkward. I shall await your story with dramatic tension!

Twilight's standing in the background

"I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead...

Other then that:

Image: http://s3.amazonaws.com/kym-assets/photos/images/small/000/103/740/Me%20Gusta.png?1318992465

woo....Finally. Two chapters. (Not being sarcastic) Seriously, I'm not sure if it's just me, But I hate ONE chapter stories that aren't one shots. Once they hit 2, I'm satisfied. So with that said,

ALLONS-Y!

By the way... Just a little nit-picking here but

Im-freaking-possible

Doesn't sound right, I know it's spelled "Impossible" but putting a word in between the Im and possible should change the m to an N, because when you actually say it, the m fights the f in pronunciation. Changing the m to an n get rid of that problem. And don't use 'Freaking' as the ing sound fights the next letter, instead use in', it flows better.

Eg.

Impossible -> In-freakin'-possible

Immobilize -> In-freakin'-mobilize

And so on.

Also if you want to try words like Unbelievable or irregular, put the extra word in were the word can still flow (and between syllables):

EG.

Unbelievable -> Unbe-freakin'-lievable

Irregular -> Irregu-freakin'-lar

Food for thought! Ignore me if you must.

Nice update as I do wonder what has become of Rainbow Dash at the end of this chapter ?

Also funny moment where Pinkie's being herself.

I cannot wait to see how Gilda reacts to her change and how it happened in the first place. Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one.

Dammit, Gilda has lost her hunting skillz. We need Skrillex!!! NAOW!

>>5593855938

Not if you're used to words like that. Like 'kampf', for example.

If i were her id eather faint and think it was a dream or FREAK THE F* out..... it needs to happen

WOW,, I don't know who I feel more sorry for, Gilda, for being a pony now, and the emotional shock she is in,

Or Twilight and her impending doom was Gilda gets her cla... Hooves on her,

Fantastic. More, please.

Wait, I'm sorry... I don't follow...

The last chapter had her coming to make up with Dash and then when she located her, walking into the library where she was suddenly hit by a spell from Twilight. But this chapter begins with her in the clouds flying after Rainbow Dash, then crashing with her to the ground.

Was that all a dream sequence?

>>5652756527 Yes that part was a dream sequence. I was originally going to have this chapter explain what exactly was going on, but I realized it would take me a long time to flesh it out and would heavily delay the second chapter. As I said in a previous comment, I stopped this chapter shorter than what I originally planned to give readers a quick followup on dramatic events. This is actually is good for me too, because now I have more time to squarely focus on the dialogue and explanations for the third chapter. In the second chapter, there are descriptive hints to convey it was a dream - but I can understand you're confusion.

In other news, I want to go back and clean up a few things - particularly in chapter one. First person view for this story gives the advantage to get personal with Gilda, detailing her thought process and exploring her mannerisms. Yet at the same time I neglected some descriptions early on. It is also a bit harder for me to explain what exactly is going on with my PoV stuck firmly on Gilda. I was hoping that the countdown in chapter one would tell readers that Twilight's spell was ACCIDENTAL and already prepped before she barged in. She was not acting of character to intentionally hurt Gilda. The line "I was staring down a glowing death ball of magic." was supposed to be a dramatic, somewhat funny, intentional misinterpretation of Twilight's spell. I realize now that the "fire" part was also a bit misleading in this regard - and since I didn't really mention any descriptions of burning in the opening of chapter two; I could see how it might of confused a few people.

Thanks for bearing with me to anyone who didn't quite understand what I was going for. The fault lies more on me than anyone else.

I'm slightly confused at all that happened...I guess Gilda was dreaming...and then going through a LOT of bodily feelings...before finally just opening her eyes. Seems almost like you dragged that out a bit much...can't really explain it. But, all the same, I still really liked it and I can't wait to see more.

>>5665556655

Okay, yeah. I see that now. I'm going to agree with Tailslover that for a dream sequence it dragged on for a while, and the part when she was brought back to reality seemed short in comparison. You might want to also add some more "dreamlike" imagery the next time you go doing a dream sequence. Something surreal but symbolic, you know?

That said, I'm still eagerly awaiting the next chapter.

well played

Eh, I could tell it was a dream the whole time. After all, there was no other logical continuity to go from horrible, staggering pain to midair chase scene. There's plenty of symbolism as written.

Also, the slow, terrible realization was quite well written. As was everything else. I look forward to more!

>>5652756527 Lol even i knew that was just a dream XD

Chapter one got some heavy revisions - particularly for the introduction and the room scene. Any misconceptions about Twilight should be cleared up, and I hope you guys enjoy the added descriptions. It's a full 1000 words longer than the previous version. Chapter two stayed relatively the same, only a few words changed.

I was out of state visiting family last week so I couldn't do much else for chapter three. It's still under construction, but the good news is that I'm back to working on it. I'll try to have it out soon, but its going to be hard to handle. It will be a critical chapter explaining and expanding core elements of the future story.

>>6681866818

Still doesn't explain why I recieved five e-mails that said this story had updated

It must be sending one every time they fix a typo.

Maybe the site needs a 'new chapter' notification that looks different from 'story was touched'?

Is it just me, or was there something removed from the previous chapter awhile ago? (Not the update that added 1000 words) because for some reason I remember a small amount of description of griffin instincts and when I went back to read over it again it was gone. Or am I just going insane?

Oops! Just looked over it one more time and I found it.

I was looking for it to say this:

I assume these "Base instincts" refer to the Griffin instincts and not just Gilda.

So from that, I will take a wild guess and say that because she turns into a pony, part or all of this instinct go away. Therefore helping her control the pride. But you know, I might be very wrong.

>>6727767277 You are right to think that her turning into a pony will influence her cognition and instincts to some degree. As to how and what will come of it, is the surprise of this story. Gilda will be facing a type of identity crisis that will dig deeper than just predatory instincts. I will play into a sort of nurture vs. nature scenario while trying to draw parallels between Griffon society to Pony society.

>>6762067620

Go away, Mr. Bot.

>>6735767357

You are going to... Forget it.

I like this story.

>>5319353193 Let us all shun the non-believer. Shun, shun, shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunn...

...

Charlie the Unicorn. Made unicorns fucking epic before MLP.

No updates ?

... still no...

stillworking on it?

...so... are you still working on this or has this fic passed on?

>>118887118887

I'm still working on it but have made very little progress due to a number of factors.

I've had many issues with my family over the holidays and have been traveling long distances to visit and take care of problems. It's been pretty hectic. Second, I can't have much private / quiet time to myself to write in my current living space. I'm in a very small trailer with my mother and brother, and whenever I do find a few hours of alone time, I'm not always in the mood to write. It is completely aggravating to be stricken with an idea and have no quiet place to focus on writing.

However, I do not want to say these are the only reasons why I have made little progress. This story is hard for me to write because I'm not sure on how to write well enough to reach a unique consequence of events. I'm still new to writing and this is my first serious attempt at making a story. It's been an uphill battle of writing and deleting because I'm not convinced it sounds good enough or is believable to the characters.

Right now I've stepped back from the third chapter until I can come up with a complete overarching plan on how to create the rest of the story. I'm not even sure if I can have a 'Comedy' tag anymore due to where I want to take this story in future chapters

tldr: family problems, living problems, this story is hard for me

>>119217119217 hoping you can over come your family problems i really enjoy the path that this fict is going id be a shame if we lost such a great concept hears ruteing for another chapter

~NeverKnown

January 26th of my blog:

I don't want to set an exact date of the next chapter, but it won't take another month that's for sure >_>

Yay for not completely blowing my somewhat joking deadline!

Alright guys, third chapter is up. I went back to change a few minor things in chapter 1, since they were worded awkwardly. Nothing big, but it will help out new readers. Also, the picture has changed, and to those that have been following the story, you will notice the change besides the nice blue background.

This third chapter took a lot of effort, and a lot of time. Some parts get a little heavy, so I striked out the Comedy tag. I was hoping there was a "normal" tag I could use instead of "slice of life" because I don't want to put "dark" or "sad" on this story - even though it will delve into some of those areas.

Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy chapter 3.

WOOOOO!  Its been so long, I had forgotten all about this story,

witch is good because I got yo read it all over again!

and this chapter was fantastic! you are pulling this off so well,  and the Cute mark was a good detail to add, just having her look was perfect

Yes, this story lives, I'm happy to see it updated.

Moar, plox! No, really... I'd love more. Thanks for the nice chapter.

when i saw this in my inbox I was like "Oh my Faust... how could I forget about this!"

amazing chapter, very strong

OH SHIT

I completely forgot to send you my review of this.

Oh god, I'm so very sorry. Things have been so crazy for me lately that it just completely slipped my mind. Can you forgive me?

>>250506250506

The initial version I sent you was complete s*** compared to this version, so I'm kind of glad you didn't review it.

It's fine. This chapter was a self made product; I had no one review it for its completion. In a way, this was a challenge to see how well I could self edit this powerful chapter.

I forgive you - really its fine. Just read and tell me what you think about it

>>249787249787

No cutie!

also awesome chapter!

It updated!

Wow great chapter im looking forward to more ^^

i nearly forgot about this story its been so long

“Oh n-n-o, I c-c-can’t h-hold it in!” she exclaimed in panic, her voice cracking under intense pressure.

..... THAT'S WHAT HE SAID!

I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. Good story though!

What did the ending mean? When she said "Was it because of this?", what did that really mean?

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