Log Date: 7 24 3
Subject: “The Cutie Mark Crusaders”
Audio Recorded by: Peridot Facet-2F5L Cut-5XG
“A slight correction from my previous report, it appears that the “Cutie Mark Crusaders” are not Quartz warriors or Amethyst guards. In fact, I deduce that their combat prowess is below elementary level. The “Cutie Mark Crusaders” as I understand are some sort of inquisition group. Similar to the functionality enforcement squads on Homeworld, the Crusaders oversee that all beings of this dimension are appropriately fulfilling their assigned task, they report any dissidence to their leaders and the defective citizens are quickly stamped out.”
“That’s not what we do at all!”
“... just a moment…”
*transmission cuts out*
…
*transmission resumes*
“It appears that I must redact my previous statement, as the Crusaders have corrected me. Their purpose is not to inquire and root out functionality dissidence, but instead their purpose is to, and I quote: “help fillies all over Equestria to find the special talent that represents their cutie mark” end quote. This brings to light two things, first this dimension is known to as “Equestria”. Secondly, the social structures of this dimension’s society completely elude me. According to the Crusader’s leader, the “Apple Bloom”, the goal of each “pony” in “Equestria” is to discover a functional purpose in which they excel. I initially hypothesized that this was a function that was imprinted on them upon their creation, similar to how each Gem is assigned a particular role from the moment of their emergence. While I still thoroughly believe this hypothesis is legitimate, I have been told otherwise by the “Apple Bloom’s” followers, the “Sweetie Belle” and the “Scootaloo”. They propose that one’s “Cutie Mark”—the appearance modifier that insinuates a pony’s purpose—is something that must be discovered and searched for, and that it is not merely assigned to them upon creation. The crusaders explain that they assist others who are deficient in their function or have yet to even discover it. I cannot help but recall Steven’s idealisms of being free to choose your own function in life; the resemblance is shockingly similar.”
“On another note, I am intrigued the biology of “Ponies”. According to the Crusaders, there exist three distinct sub-species of ponies: the Earth Pony, the Pegasus, and the Unicorn. The Apple Bloom is of the Earth pony species, exhibiting incredible physical strength and endurance in addition to an expansive knowledge of agriculture and cultivation. The Sweetie Belle is a Unicorn, their physical forms feature a hardened Keratin appendage on their cranial structure that houses cosmic powers similar to a Gem’s extra physical capabilities. According to the Sweetie Belle, this appendage can summon arcane abilities such as: energy attacks, telekinesis, teleportation, and substance transmutation, to name a few. Further research is needed to determine the full extent of the capabilities of this appendage. The Scootaloo is of the Pegasus species, and I find them to be the superior pony species, from a biological standpoint. Having wing-like extremities on their back and an overall lighter mass with aerodynamic bodies, these types of ponies are capable of flying at high altitudes with extreme speed and velocity while still exhibiting a great amount of strength and endurance. Sadly however, the Scootaloo is apparently born defective and thus incapable of flight… I can’t help but sympathize with her. Being a generation 2 Peridot myself...I lack certain abilities inherent to most Gems, thus my dependency on limb enhancers. While this dimension’s lax procedures with each individual’s specific function continue to perplex me, I hope that continued interaction with the Crusaders will assist me in my understanding and research on Equestria, and perhaps even help me find a way to return to Earth. Peridot out.”
-End of Transmission
Love it
PERIDOT
7985201 *in a Peridot voice* objectively, Best Crystal Gem
7985177 thank you ^^ that means alot to me
Ok.
7985401
She is so cute. You nailed her voice perfectly.
Lapidot is best ship
Wow you did a really good job with Peridot's speech pattern and personality! I am interested! :D
7985526 Why Thank you! <3 I actually think and talk a lot like her so it was quite easy for me XD
Keep this up man that was hilarious! "Stamp out the defective" man that was funny good work I love both MLP and SU!
7985685 Thanks so much for your kind comments ^^, I currently have her report on Twilight in the editing stage
more
Eagerly awaiting for the Pinkie Pie report, and the unavoidable sanity loss.
Not bad, you have her voice down. I'll be watching.
Awesome fic,I love Peridot!I can't wait for the next chapter.
7986369 Why thank you so much, i'm glad you like it ^^
well well. it would be far more interesting, imo, if this turned out to be another planet that peridot was transported to, but whatever. the point is her reaction to being in equestria.
now that I think about it, it reminds me of ToucanLDM's work on youtube. Steven Universe Meets My Little Pony? wonder why he hasn't made that one yet...
7986080 will do ^^ more to come very soon
7987369 I still take it that you are enjoying it? i always appreciate opinions from the audience
7987405 oh, very much so i'd like to see her meet luna so they can have a "who's life sucked more" conversation
which luna would inevitably win, but peridot's arguments would be hilarious.
7987459 i want to focus on the CMC and the Mane 6 for now at least, but considering how well received this has been i might make other reports on additional characters, thank you ^^
Very nice
7988159 Thank you for your kind comment ^^
Peri doesn't know what art is yet:
The only difference is human's are still free to choose a different function after finding there function. With ponies, however, its different. Once they find there function that's what you're stuck with.
So you better hope you get a cutie mark that covers an array of talents and hobbies (Like Magic! Or trying to make people Happy! ) otherwise they're gonna do horribly if they want to get out of there "Comfort Zone" and try something new.
7988777 jdhdbfhdbcjrueu3y3g4vrhreuen2ie jdhdbfhdbcjrueu3y3g4vrhreuen2ieg b4jcirjrb 77rhfmdmdoqhwbdie71jeu3i FUCK! I CANNOT BELIEVE I OVERLOOKED THAT!
7987496 another idea: if peri is meeting the mane 6, she'll also probably meet starlight at some point. Starlight should introduce her to Trixie. Trixie and peridot are two of the snarkiest characters I know of. Their conversation would have more thinly veiled insults than the season 6 finale!
7988870 oooh that's an idea, I initially wanted Equestria's timeline to be after Season 4, but I will definitely consider your input
ouch