Not Quite ‘Stranger Danger’
In retrospect, maybe Twilight Sparkle shouldn’t have snuck into Starlight Glimmer’s room while the latter was in town.
Sure, Starlight had asked her not to enter after they had set it up, but for some reason that made Twilight want to see it even more.
Perhaps Twilight should have taken the hint after she disabled the first arcane lock—and certainly after the twentieth.
But here she was now, sitting in Starlight’s room, just… appalled at what she was staring at. Truly, honestly appalled. She was at a loss for thought right now.
She certainly didn’t notice Starlight had entered the room until the latter shrieked, causing Twilight’s heart to leap into her throat and her head to swivel around, whereupon she saw Starlight with her eyes wide open and a hoof on her chest.
“Twilight, what are you doing in my room?” Starlight asked. “I specifically asked you not to come in!”
Twilight turned back to take in the sight of the room and groaned. “I can certainly see why now. All of these pictures of Spike…”
“Well,” Starlight said as she entered her quarters, “it’s certainly not finished—I have to take more photographs, then figure out which ones to collage together in order to create the perfect artwork to show my appreciation for Spike.”
“Starlight, these are all pictures of Spike sleeping.”
Starlight chuckled. “Well, it wouldn’t be much of a surprise if I took them while he was awake, would it?”
“Starlight, that’s awful,” Twilight said as she shook her head. She looked around. “You know, other than the gross violation of privacy, these are pretty good pictures. I’d say you have some practice with this sort of thing, if I’m not mistaken.”
Starlight hummed as she pulled out a box from under her bed and rifled through it. “I’m glad you noticed. I used to do this sort of thing all the time.” She flashed a few photos in front of Twilight. “Which one do you think looks better?”
“U-uhm…”
Twilight blushed. “These are all highly inappropriate photographs to be taking of a baby dragon.”
“Well, it’s not like I have control over how he positions himself while he’s asleep,” Starlight said with a giggle. “Now, which one looks better?”
Twilight’s eyes danced between the two photographs of indecent sourcing, incredibly dismayed at her student’s poor life choices. Not that she hadn’t made questionable life choices before, having started a cult and almost destroying the world through timeline shenanigans, but this was beyond the pale. Far beyond the pale.
Twilight gulped. “Starlight, I don’t know how to politely tell you this, but this is―”
A sound like a baby dragon knocking on the threshold of Starlight’s room caused Twilight and Starlight to turn their heads to see Spike with an eyebrow raised and the corners of his mouth turned down. The two were frozen in place for completely different reasons as Spike entered the room slowly and took a practiced glance around the room, his viewing ending with his eyes landing on Starlight.
“What’s this?” he asked as he pointed at surreptitiously obtained photographs.
“It’s um,” Twilight said, “it’s―”
“Somewhere between exactly what it looks like and what it doesn’t look like,” Starlight interjected before a wide grin appeared on her face. “Now, what does it look like?”
Spike stroked his chin as he surveyed the myriad pictures of him in slumber posted around Starlight’s room, apparently deep in thought. “It looks like…”
“Now, Spike,” Twilight said, “I understand if you have trouble trusting Starlight after this.” She glared at Starlight, whose grin grew sheepish. “I certainly do.”
“Now, why would I have trouble trusting Starlight?” Spike asked as he continued to look at the photos. “It looks like she was trying to make a collage of me for me as a surprise, which would explain why they’re all of me sleeping.” He ambled towards Starlight and hugged her. “And this looks like a really nice surprise from a really nice friend.”
Sounds came out of Twilight’s throat as her jaw dropped, Starlight returning Spike’s hug in the meantime. “Gah… guh… eyurrhgh….”
“Spike, I’m so sorry that your surprise present was ruined!” Starlight said as she embraced Spike tightly. She then pulled away from him with her hooves on his shoulders and a smile on both of their faces. “Can you ever forgive me?”
“Byyuh… eyurrr… fyeeeee…”
Spike chuckled. “Of course I can! But now maybe I can help you with my present by letting you take some sweet pics of me when awake,” he said as he flexed his bicep, “especially some of me showing off these babies!”
Twilight was beyond sounds at this point, resorting to yanking on her facial muscles with her hooves.
“Of course, Spike.” Starlight blushed. “Now your collage will be made to ord―”
“Okay, both of you shut up!”
Starlight and Spike snapped to face a very disturbed and disgruntled Twilight.
Twilight pointed at Starlight. “You! You… you shouldn’t be taking pictures of anyone while they’re sleeping!” Then she pointed at Spike. “And you! You should know better than to accept and encourage this… this maladaptive behavior!”
Starlight looked down, seemingly deep in thought, then looked back at Twilight. “But I thought it was okay to do anything to serve friendship.”
“Yeah, me too,” Spike said. “You always said that nothing is not allowed in the name of friendship, and Starlight’s my friend who’s doing something very nice for me,” he finished as he clung to her foreleg.
Twilight’s jaw clenched and her breathing grew shallower, and shallower, and shallower, and shallower―
And then stopped and she brought her forehooves to her chest, took a deep breath in, then released.
“Okay,” Twilight said, “I am going to go to Applejack’s place and drink. Heavily. There, I’ll forget that this conversation ever happened and I’ll come back to see a wonderful collage made for my best friend by my student, the latter who isn’t a creep and the former who doesn’t need a talk about boundaries.”
Twilight then left Starlight’s room and slammed the door behind her, shifting some of the dust which should have really been taken care of.
Starlight and Spike traded glances.
“Okay,” Spike said as he hopped onto Starlight’s bed, “take some pictures of me looking macho.”
Starlight grabbed the camera and started snapping photos. “Can do, buddy!”
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Umm wow
was a very good read 
derpicdn.net/img/view/2015/12/5/1037459__safe_meme_comic_spike_edit_vulgar_idw_reaction+image_wtf_artist-colon-katiecandraw.png
For such a...disturbing, shall we say premise, it's very funny and rather well done.
This was absolutely hilarious
7974016 Thanks!
7974026 Funny how Equestria works, isn’t it?
7974049 Not an unexpected reaction, to be honest.
7974052 Again, compliments are appreciated.
7974071 And thank you, as well!
7974076 wow, that's a quick response
and Your welcome
7974082 I get super nervous whenever I post a story.
7974084
Why would you be nervous? (I mean, I get the same way, but your stories are always awesome<3)
7974113 Habit, I guess.
Hard to break ingrained habits.
That was awesome.
I look forward to reading more of your work.
7974116 Glad to hear that.
It's stupid but not a bad stupid. It's a good stupid. It made me crack a smile and it was entertaining. Good job
7974133 Smiles are always a goal I strive for.
I am greatly amused!
7974142 Good to hear.
Haha, you perfectly captured Spike's naivety.
7974170 Yeah, Spike was super fun to write in this story.
Extreme tendencies of love expression.
i.ytimg.com/vi/XUdngyMdYy4/maxresdefault.jpg
7974245 Isn’t it sweet?
7974314 Yeah p much
7974314
Appropriate avatar.
Crazy minds think alike, I suppose. I'm glad Spike has someone who openly appreciates him. His fragile ego could use it.
img.imgland.net/Sk97G58.png
You start a sentence with the word "now" three times in four paragraphs. Might wanna work on that.
7974367 It’s literally three different characters saying that, but I understand how that can seem repetitive in prose.
I’ll make sure to watch out for that in the future. Thank you for pointing out something that I can work on concerning my writing. I certainly appreciate that you took time out of your day to read through my story and point out something I can improve upon out of what I assume was an honest desire to help me.
pre14.deviantart.net/6384/th/pre/f/2016/353/b/5/you_can_t_even_know_how_hard_i_m_shipping_this____by_amethyst_dawn_42-das72eu.png
GlimSpike hinting? Yeah, I'll ship it.
Um. Excuse me for a second.
Freaking what?!
7974384 I’ll let you believe what you wish; it doesn’t affect the story either way.
7974404 It’s exactly what it looks like.
7974318 By sweet you mean dangerously pursuing the person thy love via perverted means then yes it's sweet.
7974424 I completely agree with the sentiment you just expressed.
7974467 I’m glad you enjoyed it for what it was.
And yes, my inclination is far more towards the making people laugh hemisphere, and failing that making them question my sanity.
Well, thanks. Now my dog is pissed at me cause I woke him up laughing.
7974510 Can’t please everyone, I guess.
Glad you enjoyed it, though!
I laughed, and it's very much in line with the way you depict these characters and this world, and I absolutely love sociopathic Starlight when you write her that way, but...
All I could think of while reading this was that episode of Dif'rent Strokes with the bicycle man.
7974599 I will fully admit to coming up to within a nanometer of that line when writing this story.
I’m glad you were still able to find it humorous, though.
I'm calling the police.
I laughed because I'm a bad person.
I'm also slightly uncomfortable with myself for finding this hilarious.
That's good, so kudos.
7974663 I think Neil Gaiman once said something along the lines of we’re all horrible people pretending to be good people, so I assure you that you’re in good company.
Not what I expected.... It's better!
...So does Starlight make collages of ALL her friends?
7974806
Starlight's just lucky Twilight didn't see her collage... that's why it was placed in the closet.
This is soooo meta, it's like Twilight is looking at bronies and find them weird, but at the same time, they're not that weird, damn that sooo deep.
I also laughed. I don't know why but I laughed. Good job.
That's too much informations, I don't want to hear more, plz have mercy.
7974666
Except for the ones of us that don't pretend...
Sanity questioned. But, is it my sanity or yours?
*hugs tight* Fantastic one shot Syeek!
I can't even
...!
7974026 Also, she just entered a locked room which she was asked not to enter.
Here I thought Glimglam was gonna chew Twilight out for breaking into her room and -that- was the boundary being broken.
I was wrong.
7975246 Was seriously expecting the same.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2016/3/27/1118179__safe_edit_edited+screencap_screencap_fluttershy_rarity_spike_starlight+glimmer_twilight+sparkle_the+crystalling_spoiler-colon-s06e01_animated_.gif
Goddamn it, Majin.