Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Magic ~ Press Start
After a strange dream, you wake up on a cliff side to find that you have become a pony. With no memory of being human except for a single name from your past, you befriend a unicorn named Twilight and learn more about the amazing world that you now inhabit. But sinister forces are on the move, and soon you find yourself flung into an incredible journey of adventure and friendship, with your actions forever determining the fate of Equestria.
Chapters (1)
Hey fan fiction readers, this story marks a number of firsts for me:
- First time starting a really long fic.
- First time writing in second person / present tense.
- First time implementing music into a fic.
So all comments, criticisms, questions and compliments are appreciated, and will help me to improve this story.
No matter how small and insignificant the detail, if it bugs you, tell me, and then I'll do my best to fix it
854971
Needs more cow bells
Putting this on the read later list. Will post a real comment in the morning.
YES
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YEs
Okay, I was joking in my last comment.
However, I thought that the mane six would've been their own rescue team, but I'll see where this toes.
Wow, three days after I start playing Explorers of Time again, this appears! I was wondering if someone had done this before! Detailed feedback will come eventually as more of the story materializes. I do like the casting of Twilight as the Partner.
... Okay, this is actually pretty good. Didn't notice any GLARING mistakes, but then again, it's 12:30, and I don't exactly LOOK for errors that late! XD I like how you were able to chose a (mostly) Gender neutral name, as any girls who hate 'Alex' can just say it's short for Alexandr(i)a. Pretty well written, so I'll thumbs up and track for now.
I say good chap, this story does show promise, so, for my early prologue rating, I give this
Four mustache spikes out of five
All my yes, good chap
im curious what kind of pony he turned into, based on the pic he could be either a pegasus or an earth pony
cant wait to see how this story progresses
I gotta admit i had the idea of incorporating Mystery dungeon and Ponies together for a while now........i just couldnt figure out how to execute that idea but you did it good so far....... i cant wait what else you do with the story.
*POSSIBLE SPOILERS*
In the game, it turns out you got amnesia and your friend was your companion before and you got separated while time travelling! It's a great game, Dialga is quite easy but Palkia is tough!
859316 859539 859455 Thanks a lot
859334 Glad you're excited
859322 Oh shoot, how could I forget the cowbell?!
859350 I thought about this, but rescue teams only have a maximum of four members on the team.
Besides, on the games, and in my story, the focus is between the hero and their partner. I'll try not to disappoint though
859449 It's weird, Alex was the most sexually ambiguous name I could think of, but it's also my brother's name, so for me it will always be male
Glad it worked out though, keeping the hero neutral can be tough.
859670 Could be a unicorn too, if you line it up with Twilight's horn it would be hidden in the hero's mane.
I purposefully made the pic as mysterious as possible
859371 859878 859889 Hey fellow Mystery Dungeon fans!
Hope I live up to your expectations, you know what kind of legacy I have to follow
Thanks a lot everyone, I've got all the story planned out so I'll keep the chapters coming
I've always liked the mystery dungeon games and seeing it come in a fanfic is awesome.
2nd pony (person) here you go...You see a very excited person bobbing up and down behind you, she seems to be a mare but in human form. You smile and giggle at her funny antics; she stops jumping and gives you a thumbs up for an awesome beginning
860166 Thanks, those games are fantastic, I hope I can make a faithful tribute
860356 Thanks DreamWings!
I'm glad second "pony" went well, I understand it has a bad wrap.
But there was absolutely no other way I could do a Mystery Dungeon crossover, it just had to be from the readers eyes
Well, I have been waiting for this croz to be done someday
I know the story and some major areas of explorers of the sky. And how everything should be, if I can be of any help you have only need to ask me
859889
Actually, it was Grovyle who was your companion. You and your new partner have no previous connection.
860451 Oh no worries, I know all about Explorers of Sky myself.
Besides, my storyline is going to be different, albeit still inspired by those games
I loved this game so much!
You have gifted us a most fantastical journey for those who have and haven't played the wonderful game. I have high expectations but I know that you can do it.
As for the music, you should check out a website called Youtube repeat, it's the same exact thing as Youtube but the video loops instead of just stopping at the end. I use it all of the time and it works great for music that ends before the person finishes reading.
Godspeed!
~The Midway Bridge
860878
Wow, thank you, I certainly hope I can live up to those expectations
And I'll check that site out, sounds very helpful
860888
Actually it's easier to use Youtube repeat this way:
1. Find a vid on Youtube
2. in the address bar type repeat after youtube
3. Presto! loopy loopy
example:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6Ri_uA_R2k&feature=plcp ===> http://www.youtuberepeat.com/watch?v=e6Ri_uA_R2k&feature=plcp
Simple and works for anything!
~The Midway Bridge
860911
Okay, thanks, I'll try implementing that soon
potential for good. I'll follow...for now.
Good work with the music, by the way. I enjoyed having it in the background. I gave a unique air to the story.
860693 oh yeah, stupid me. Also, I hate Dusknoir.
861147
Thanks, I'm glad that the music worked out
Hope I don't disappoint
861518
Argh, so much pressure!
Lol, I'll try my best
This story shows immense possibility, and is well written from the start.
My only wish is that if you were going to be making a crossover like this, that you were using a 100% OC cast, rather than trying to slot characters from the show into different roles.
but, as long as you do it, well, then it shouldn't be a problem.
861566
Lol, just kidding around, trying to strike up a rapport with my readers, you know
861587
Well, in a way, using the main cast but rearranged is just another way for me to emulate the Mystery Dungeon games.
All the main characters on the games are the familiar faces of various Pokemon, so this will sort of be like that
But I can assure you, I won't force it. The existing ponies will only go somewhere if it fits
861619
Well, the Pokemon in the Mystery Dungeon were going to have to be familiar, if only because there's a very much limited number of available pokemon. There's a very much finite number of Pokemon, but Ponies are individuals.
each of the characters in the Mystery Dungeon series have their characteristics based on their natural data from the Pokedex Entries, and are fairly uniform...
but Ponies can be anything they so choose to be, and only occasionally fall into true stereotypes.
After all, we've seen high-society Pegasi, Earth Ponies, and Unicorns, and we've seen all three races working in Appleoosa, and the only reason there aren't' EPs and Unicorns all over Cloudsdale is because Pegasi are the only ones of the three that can naturally stand on clouds without assistance.
861635
That's what I mean though, if I'd used OC's then you wouldn't have gotten that same feeling of familiarity as with the Pokemon
I'm sorry, I'm not very good at explaining my creative decisions sometimes, but hopefully it will turn out for the best when this story is finished
861649
Again, as long as you do this well, and don't copy-pasta the storylines of any of the Mystery Dungeon games, it'll be just fine.
Really, DON'T copy-pasta the story, it was good to play, not so great to just read.
However, I do like that you infer that the MD games have already happened, what with the voice mentioning that it enjoys talking to anyone that passes through.
861659
Ah yes, I'm glad that you picked up on that
And don't worry, I had no intention of copying the story from the games
My idea is uniquely tailored to fit the pony world while still being inspired by the mystery dungeon games
I think I'd chuck a fit if I opened a story like this and it was just the games story with ponies slapped on
861688
I would too, and then I'd throw my back out, as my fits tend to be heavy.
Damnit.
Damnit Damnit Damnit.
You stole my idea without knowing I had it.
I hate you.
Great first chapter, though.
863607
Hehehe, Inception at it's finest
Glad you liked it
i wish i still had explorers of darkness *sigh*
864435
So do I, but it's been quite a while since Explorers came out.
I wish that they'd hurry up and release a Pokemon Mystery Dungeon on the 3DS
...Mystery dungeon?
As in Pokemon Mystery Dungeon, my favorite game series of all time?
Oh god yes.
...Just read the chapter.
I repeat my former statement.
Oh god yes.
865313 865344
This pleases me
Glad you enjoyed
Hang on...
You need to tack this onto the end. This is not a question, this is a DEMAND.
Little did they know.....
That this would be the start...
Of a grand adventure.....
[ACTIVATE TITLE THEME! LET THE NOSTALGIA FLOWETH FORTH!]
867488
Oh ho ho ho, we've got a true fan over here...
I was going to add it to the title on the top of the chapter, but I thought it would confuse people since a new song starts almost immediately
How about I add it into the story summary, so that you can listen to it on the 'title screen' of the fic?
Man, this first person stuff is good. Even my name is correct!
869033
It's actually second person, but still lol-worthy
869001
...You mad genius.
870858
*bows deeply* It is done, what do you think?
Well i'll be darned, a Mystery Dungeon crossover with ponies, will DEFINITELY keep an eye on this
)
Having played the series from Red to Darkness to Sky, we shall see if you can live up to their legacy (thinks back to the story ending with the sad song...
Keep up the good work
872172
Thanks, I certainly hope I can too
871201
I approve of this addition!
872172
This brings up a very good point.
One of the VERY few times I've cried is at the endings of the Pokemon Mystery Dungeon games.
You better do that as well.