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  • T Biblical Monsters: Lost Angel

    “No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.” ― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
    1,932 words · 4,060 views  ·  445  ·  21
  • E The Conversion Bureau: What Would Really Happen?

    Seriously? The whole world drops it's collective pants to become ponies? Yeah right.
    2,059 words · 9,695 views  ·  252  ·  13
  • T Hurt

    A sorrowful alicorn looks back with regret at mistakes once made.
    1,075 words · 1,255 views  ·  69  ·  4
  • T The Fight

    Twilight and Spike have a fight. Your choice at the end determines how depressing it gets.
    2,625 words · 2,165 views  ·  64  ·  5
  • T Sins of Our Sisters

    A young filly wakes up in the Everfree with memories not of her own. A tale of old sins redeemed.
    18,231 words · 881 views  ·  30  ·  2
  • T The Conversion Bureau: Why?

    A man asks the most important question of himself and the ponies: why?
    10,980 words · 1,832 views  ·  58  ·  21

Blog Posts26

  • Thursday
    The blog in which Minalkra moans and Rarity loses her mind

    An Excerpt from a Meeting

    "Ok, let's try this again."  Minalkra removed his glasses and ran a hand down his face.  Arrayed around him were half-empty soda cans and opened nicotine patch containers.  To his left, the scowling blue face of Bruce in a haze of smoke; to his right, the scowling elderly face of another human; and across form him, the tired and strangely sympathetic face of Rarity.  "So after the song-and-dance bit, you get led around by Willy Wonka and ask ques-"

    "I already said no," Bruce bluntly stated with a sneer, speaking out of the empty side of his mouth.  The movement caused the cigarette to wobble and drop ash across the table - much to Rarity's discomfort.  "There is no way in hell I'm going to be even remotely interested in pony toys.  Especially after that opening."

    "I did not sign up for a walk-on roll!"  Gene 'Willy' Wilder banged a fist on the table.

    Bruce slammed his hoof down as well.  "Bruce doesn't care about toys, he wants to get home!"

    "The piece is about the ponies, not about you!"

    "Bullshit, you just want to hog the camera!"

    "I am a star, damn it!  I demand more screen time!"

    "I demand you shut your face!"

    "Gentle stallions, please."  Rarity begged, putting her head in her hooves.  Normally she would have been more ladylike but from the state of her mane, it was clear this had been going on for quite some time.  "Can we focus on getting some sort of compromise together before I lose what little composure I have left?!"

    Minalkra groaned as a fresh round of bickering broke out, Rarity's voice now added to the mix.  "What did I do to deserve this?"

    So yeah.  I am still working on it but it is not going well.  Bruce refuses to have anything to do with Willy's Toy Emporium but I can't just kick him out immediately - Willy would get really upset (i.e. I would waste a good opportunity to do things and that's kinda awkward for me to introduce a new setting and then immediately leave).  I have a part of an interlude sort of planned out but even that isn't coming out right and the timing is off enough to make me wince.

    But I am still alive and when I write, I write this.  Mostly. when I type, I type at this - and then immediately delete about four-fifths what I type.  And then cry.

    25 comments · 368 views
  • 7w, 1d
    Hey Bookshelves!

    15 comments · 281 views
  • 26w, 2d

    It's 2:30 in the morning.  I'm tired but can't sleep.  I have work in less than seven hours.

    I've written nearly two thousand words and none of it is working no matter how hard I try.  At all.  I need to start from scratch almost scratch because I am NOT leaving out that scene probably scratch.  I've opened that chapter twice daily for this week save today and stared at it trying to will the words to fit.  I've written two hundred words this week and immediately deleted every single one.  Every.  Single.  One.

    The 18th was my birthday.  I celebrated by smoking myself to death and not trying to write.  I think I'm doing this 'hobby' thing wrong.


    To be honest, I think it's that one scene I don't want to get rid of - it sounds soooo good and it really hints at some important things but I think I'll have to get rid of it.  Damn.  Well, I'll start fresh when I have a moment tomorrow (probably when I come home from work) and see where a new perspective gets me.  Sorry about the wait all, Rarinegans are coming.  If only I could get this 'writing' thing I've heard about so much working right ...

    35 comments · 885 views
  • 31w, 1h
    Inspiration and 'Ownership'

    I've had a few PM's from authors asking to use the 'adult in foal' idea for their own stories.  I find this to be very strange - I do not 'own' this idea.  Hell, I'm writing My Little Pony fanfiction, can I really say I own anything beyond Bruce?  Though Bruce is a lot less like myself now than he was (exaggerated as he may be), that character is the only thing I can even remotely claim as my own.  Everything else is either Hasbro's or an idea.  And mine wasn't even the very first 'adult in foal body' story, though I hadn't read anything similar when I began this little thing two three (?) years ago.

    The thing is, despite claims to the contrary from certain ligation-happy corporations and industries, no one can 'own' an idea.  At least, not in the world of art and not for very long.  And writing is an art and all art inspires others with similar thoughts.  Inspiration is always free.  No matter how many lawsuits are drafted and courts contacted, art will inspire derivatives and this is as it should be.  Art ought to inspire for all art is derivative in some way.  Whether that inspiration be for something banal such as monetary gain or something ... more, all art will inspire.  Who am I to deny the will of another's muse?

    So let this be a blanket 'go ahead' from me to use this idea of 'mine.'  Write as your muse directs you.

    As a side note and a question, is this a 'thing' now?  If I were to be so moved by a piece to write something similar myself, should I be sending PM's willy nilly begging for permission to ... let my expression free?  On a website whose very purpose is to showcase derivative art of a television show, is this really something we should be concerned about?  Credit where it is due and all (or infamy as the case may be for some of the works produced) - but what if I was inspired by revulsion?  Should I credit the author then without explanation on how they inspired me?

    Obligatory Oh to be Old Again Update

    Not story-tagged because it's such a small part of the reason for this post but yes, I'm still doing it and yes there will be a chapter at some point in time in the future.  Insert the normal excuses for lateness here: work, family, writers block and the like.  Nothing major just things taking up my mind more than the norm.

    9 comments · 371 views
  • 38w, 6d
    Oh to Be Done: Good and Bad News.

    Good news: Finally done.

    I'm co-coordinating with my editor (who is - as always - the awesome Genjen) on getting it polished but I've finally hit on every part of what I wanted to hit on.  And holy fuckballs is this thing big.  It's the most massive chapter I've ever written on anything so far.  It's still a far cry from certain other author's normal work but it is huge to me.

    And that's part of the bad news here.  It's big but because of that, it's going to take some time to get some of the kinks out.  If we change one thing here then that makes this one thing there a bit less sensible/smart/natural/why-did-I-write-that-anyway?  So I'm expecting this to take a teensy weensy bit longer to edit and polish just because of the size.

    So it'll be a tad longer.  But no more am I working on the actual writing part barring Genjen pointing out an obvious mistake I made that changes everything.  And that might still happen but hopefully I didn't fuck it up that badly.

    So the long wait is nearing an end.  I seriously hope that it's not disappointing.  I am never tackling a chapter this large again, by the way.  And ... maybe I should work on it a bit more?  Hmmm ...

    26 comments · 868 views
  • ...

Have you ever woken up somewhere you don't recognize?  I have, once before.  This time was not all that different.  Headache?  Check.  Dry mouth?  Check.  Upset stomach?  Check.  Hooves?  Uhm, that one is new.

Hi, I'm Bruce and I'm 32.  Currently, I'm in a light blue Earth Pony foal's body no one has ever seen before.  The rest of Equestria thinks I'm 9 and something really traumatic happened to me.  It doesn't help I swear like a sailor and I could really go for a smoke right about now.  I just hope that the Everfree Forest, rampaging monstrosities, evil dark abominations against God and the Cutie Mark Crusaders don't kill me before I have just one last drag.

Oh, and ponies are hella creepy when you really think about it.  Geez.

A little comedy side project.  EDIT: HAHA Main project.  More characters to be added if I get that far.  Categories might be refined as I write.  Entire thing is unplanned except vaguely.  Don't Expect excessive cursing to be written out, just hinted at.  Oh, and as the character is a 30-ish year old in the body of a 9 year old, sexual jokes might exists but sex itself will not occur.

Special thanks to user Momomojito for the awesome-tastic picture!  First fanart, I'm so HAPPY.  I've gotten more since then!  I should collect it all here.  Collected!

First Published
2nd Jul 2012
Last Modified
25th Sep 2014

Dah, is okay. Problem is: HIE. Expect people with less remorse to downvote the fuck outta yer story.

>>845048 Unlike me? It's my specialty. I'll look at it.

EDIT: Well, there are no Walls of text, no glaring grammar issues, might be going a little fast for my taste (Reason below) but so far, it's a decent story. Might not catch too much attention, but I enjoy what character I'm following so far.

Of course, I never really cared for the whole "Turned into a pony" thing, I'll let this one slide. I hope, though, that later in the story, the reasoning behind his existence and transformation is BELIEVABLE.

Seriously, better not be "Oh, I just died and went there," or "I was dragged into a random portal! By Twilight Sparkle! On Accident!" Remember: In order to make this WORK, everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, must be believable. Whether it would Be Discord wanting a quick laugh, or some other witty remark.

I'll follow this along, and see where it goes.

>>845073 All yours bud. I'm just the harbinger:rainbowlaugh:

>>845079 And done. My small thoughts are up top.

I'll give it a chance, it;s not mind-breaking, but so far, it's charming in a sense.

Great start:pinkiehappy:, Like how he keeps using his real name. And when you think about it the Ponies would look real scary if seen in real life with those proportions.

Can't wait to see where this goes.

Unless he's been eating worms, his breath is bated, not baited.

I apologize for the lateness of my reply, I was at work and could not respond.


An attempt at human scientific teleportation rips the 'weave' of our universe, spilling into the Void.  As nothing can exist therein - not even time - it in effect creates a tunnel to Equestria, bridging the way ... no, not really.  I haven't the foggiest as yet.  It's definitely not 'oh hey heaven' nor will it be Twilight's mismanagement of her own abilities.  I'd like to think Celestia's teaching is more comprehensive than that.  And as for the speed, well, this is 'random douche in Equestria.'  I'm not going for any extreme moodiness nor in-depth look at the whys and wherefores of the land.  It's meant to be lighthearted.  A test, if you will, of my own ability.  I'm failing but then again, I failed many classes in high school as well, so eh.


"It's Bruce!  Bruce!  Not 'Lightfoot von Horseapple' you thick - OW, That's my ear!  Stop yanking, you jerk!"


Well, while drunk I personally have been known to be ... experimental in my own cuisine so maybe he has?  Not really, thank you for pointing that out.

Jeez, Min, it's been forever since I saw a new bit from you. Awesome to see a new story. Been forever since i saw a good HiE. Looking forward to it. Get back to ya tomorrow.

Did you look at this pic and say, "hey I could make a story about this and cause nightmares for small children at the same time!"


Did you ask your parent's permission before getting on the internet?  Also, I've never seen that picture in my life.  That is horrifying.


Eh, I've been writing things.  Just nothing presentable.


Yes I called them across country, just to get there permission to use the internet....

Edit: (dammit now I'm sounding all butthurt) :fluttercry: I have an unatrally high voice for someone my age it just gets to me sometimes lol) anyway its a great start, going for the uncanny valley approach I haven't seen that done, I hope to see more soon :ajsmug:


Oh, sorry.  I was implying it gave you nightmares or something.  It was funny in my head, less so in text format.  Quite like this story!  Ah well.  Didn't mean to offend.  I just don't know what went wrong.  Actually, I do know what went wrong.  I opened my mouth.

>>847238 ah. I know that feel. Though it's less presentability, more "EVERYTING MUST BE IN ZE PERFECT PLACE!" so I've been editing everything, not to mention reviewing stuff. More specifically, as of last night, your stuff. So here's the review I wrote.

I. Fucking. Lol-ed. SO DAMN FUNNY! When he started swearing, it was absolutely PRICELESS! Watching this fic like a psycho stalker. :pinkiecrazy: 

Damn. That was REALLY GOOD. Simple premise, simple motivations. I liked it. Naturally I'm used to expansive, 20-part, interconnected fics with around 50 k plus words in them... But this one will do too...

Anyway, since my comment is unnaturally short, considering I usually drop off an essay, I've decided to give you a taste of my rhymes. Mostly because I'm bored, but also because I want to put off writing the story that has plagued me for 3 weeks. So here it is:

I've read every fic you have, though they are not many

So here are my thoughts, you needn't pay a penny

I've seen only one more fic about a potty mouth child

I read "of insults" by RavensDagger, isn't that wild?

It looks like the story is going well, see what you do

I'll be anxiously looking forward to "old again" part two.

I hope I have not bored you with my little rhyme

It looks, sadly, as though I'm all out of time.

*gracious bow*

>>847238 Agreed. If I were to wake up in a bed in some other world and saw that looking at me, they would need new sheets. On the other hand, I now have something to terrorize my neighbor with.



... you're exuberant.  Thanks for reading!  I have no idea what that 'Of Insults' thing is, is it any good?


All you pic posters need to stop making me want to change the fic pic.  I'd post the one with the Apple family eating meat but, uh, it's too far removed from the tone I'm going for.  Less 'Mountains of Madness' and more 'Molehills of Slight Discomfort.'

And to all those who fav'd and watched, uhm, thanks.  I had no idea this, of all things, would be my most watched fic.  Gives me impetus to continue, I s'pose.

>>852104 it's about Pipsqueak getting his cutie mark, which represents making people cry. it's a really good foray into emotion. give it a rea if you have any time...

and as for exuberant, yes i am. i like to think of myself as the best of Pinkie and Fluttershy. very meek with peoplei  don't know, but with people i do know, i'm the prime party animal... oh, and on the internet, because there's no awkward face to face intorduction. lol.


Oh, wait, I did read that.  A bit, uhm, 'too removed from the show's tone in a canon character' for me to truly enjoy.  Had it been an outsider with a more grim outlook on life, it would have been 'better' but not as funny so there's the trade off innit.  Eh, it was silly for the sake of silly, so I didn't thumb down.  Course, I rarely thumb up.  I'm thumbless, already halfway to pony state.  Oh god, make it stop!  Get that needle away from me!


Huh?  Why?  What?  Oh, uhm ... yeah, that wasn't meant seriously.  Uhm, sorry.  Didn't mean to insult, I was trying to be funny.  Again, I failed.  Sorry.

>>852155 yeah, it's pretty good. for me, canon goes out the window, except for personalities, and i always saw pipsqueak as the humble kid that the bullies always push around. in this case, he got backed up into a corner, snapped, and bit their heads off. I've seen this. although in THAT case, he broke a few bones... of theirs... YEESH.

anyway, it was pretty silly, but i like silly. actually, i like anything, assuming it's done right...

>>852155 Ah. Understood.On a side-note I DO fully intend to try to blow that picture up and make my neighbor (who happens to be a slightly younger cousin of mine) scared of Celestia. Or at least scared of his bathroom.

I really just finished the first chapter.  Immediately there is an update.

Well. leaving this here until I finish, and can give feedback.


Very interesting overall.  I think you were trying a bit too hard to be funny in your descriptions.  The whole "creepy" thing is really interesting too.  I am looking forward to seeing more.

Also, (generally a complement) it ended to soon!

Curious... do you actually go to poly (IE in long beach?)



There is more than one polytechnic, my friend.  I was thinking of Southern Polytechnic University, actually, in Georgia.  That's wife's alma mater.

Laughed a lot due to this chapter.

A little colt asking for a smoke :rainbowlaugh:

AWSOME chapter!!!!!!:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

Literally can't get enough here my friend. Can't wait for the next update.

And it's nice to see a new take on HiE, hope that Bruce can cope.

Aaaand here's how the ponies pick stuff up despite all logic and laws of physics Secret to pony grip, at least thats how i currently think of it.:twilightsmile:

I'm looking forward to seeing how he deals with his cravings, as well as what they do when he outs himself as a non-pony.

It's not gonna be pretty, but it will be HILARIOUS!:pinkiehappy::yay:

Kinda reminds me of the manga Ichinensei ni Nattara. A high school student is hit by a bus, saving a little girl, and dying in the process. He is brought back by a mad scientist. In the body of a 1st grade girl.

HA! This story man, I love it... :rainbowlaugh:

You hear that sound, Bruce? That's the sound of you digging your own metaphorical grave.




One of the best Brony-in-Equestria tales I've seen. There's no way someone would really be ready to handle a change like this gracefully and this is as graceless as it comes. :)

Just noticed one tiny glitch, "near dangerous locals" should be "near dangerous locales".

"I'm trying to flip you off but it's not very effective without fingers."

I you just made me love this fic even more, i thought that would be impossible but looks like you've done the impossible. :rainbowkiss:

This... this story right here is a fun story... and I LOVE fun story's!:pinkiehappy:

Keep it up man I'm loving this!:twilightsmile:

"I'm trying to flip you off but it's not very effective without fingers."

If I ever become a double-amputee that is a line I bet I will have to use all the time.

Trying to flip off people without fingers. The ultimate cunnundrum.

Hahahahah I'd have to admit it. Never thought I could laugh at an event in a story.

I was wrongXD

Keep it up; I can't stop laughing.  :rainbowlaugh:

Will be back later to write a review;)

"I'm trying to flip you off but it's not very effective without fingers." HAH! :rainbowlaugh:

I was right! The reaction to his demands for smokes is HILARIOUS!!!!!!!:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

Can't wait for more.

O, and "I'm trying to flip you off but it's not very effective without fingers.", officially the best line of the past 2 months.

This story is GOLDEN!

I was laughing all the way through it! :rainbowlaugh:


I agree, best.line.ever!

Words can't describe how much i love this. I will set up an alter in your honor in my home.

Awesome chapter.

Enough said.

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