32 - Soap and the Flavors Of
"Bruce, you're being ridiculous," Rarity said despite the fact that she was holding me steady at the sink. I blew more soap out of my nose in an attempt at agreement. Turns out that running in a panic to the nearest bathroom - a mare's bathroom - and pouring liquid soap on your snout to 'scrub away the filth' is not a good start to a foster parent-son relationship. The wail of pain that followed and the pair of mares shouting after you as they burst in didn't help matters.
That poor nurse that tried to come in was going to be traumatized for life.
Rarity sighed and whispered softly to herself, "Bruce, what am I going to do with you?"
"'elp me get in touc' wit' da Brincess." Trying to talk with water still flowing out of your nose is hard. The taste of the stuff didn't help matters at all. I snorted and huffed, finally clearing my sinus passages enough to talk normally. "And I want to apologize for running off like that. The mental image startled me like you wouldn't believe."
I saw Spring in the mirror turn and shoot a smile my way as a neatly folded towel floated just behind my head. Cloth towels. In a restroom. In a hospital. I suppressed a shudder and reminded myself that ponies are still a few years away from paper towel technology. And disinfectant spray. No wait, there it was.
"Bruce ... thank you." Rarity shuffled a bit on her hooves. I couldn't see her face through the terry cloth but I heard the keratin hitting tile. She sounded relieved and I couldn't blame her that much. With whatever rumors had been circling the not-so-small town about me and the undoubtedly awful (if true) things Spring must have told her, I doubt that Rarity was looking forward to our relationship.
She continued as she dropped the cloth over my face. Ew! Bathroom cloth! "Though you ought to ask to use the restroom rather than hurry into the first you see. And a mare's room at that." I heard a feminine chuckle from one of the stalls and I blushed under the towel.
"Okay!" I wiggled a bit in Rarity's grasp and she let me down gently, whisking away the washcloth. My creepy wide grin and pinprick eyes must have said something I didn't want them to because Spring and Rarity both took a nervous step back. "Let's get out of here before I mess up any other mare's life."
With a nod towards the closed stall, I trotted just outside the door. And waited. I wanted to walk off to Spring's 'talking room' on my little lonesome but we had just had this conversation about 'proper behavior' and I figured I should at least put in the effort.
"Sooo, about the Princess ..." I said, trying to very subtly shift the conversation that way. Spring was finishing up the legalese paperwork that would put me in Rarity's hooves for the time being which left her and I to wait ... in the waiting room. I didn't really question where we were going. I had more on my mind at the time.
Rarity 'hmm'd politely at me as she levitated a pair of knitting ... things and did something with them. I think it was called knitting but it didn't look like any knitting I had ever seen. The 'needles' were these super small hooks with rings on them where the yarn sat. I yanked my eyes off the now still set of hooks and back to Rarity. Who was beaming at me.
"Quite good, isn't it?" She waggled some patch of yellow knitted thing at me. "I'm not done yet but I have high hopes for them."
"Yes, wonderful." I looked at the small tube thing for a moment and then back to her smiling face. "What is it?"
Her face fell a fraction of an inch. "A set of socks, silly."
"Socks?" The things were tiny! They might fit on my hooves but not ... hers. Then it hit me. She was knitting me a pair of socks. Rarity. Knitting me socks. Holy hells, Rarity was going to be my foster mother.
"Yes, socks." We looked at each other for a moment as my mind raced. Rarity. An OCD unicorn germaphobe was going to be my foster mother. On the down side, she was Rarity and I wasn't exactly the epitome of neatness and propriety. On the upside, however, Sweetie Belle was going to be my foster aunt (and that would hopefully end at least her schoolyard crush on me) and I was a half step closer to the Princess.
Rarity began to shift her eyes around the room as a smile grew on my face. A very wide smile. No it wasn't creepy, what are you talking about?
"And done!" Spring's voice from nearby jerked me out of my hopeful dreams of a quick resolution. She ignored my yelp of fright and 'winged' over a folder of documents to Rarity. "He is now in your care, Ms. Belle."
Rarity bit her lip as she looked at the folder in her aura. My heart started to sink as I saw worry and doubt creep across her face. If Rarity was having second thoughts ... she closed her eyes and I shared a glance with Spring. We both were having the same thoughts and I took a deep breath. No matter what happened, I would not panic. I would not scream. I would get home.
I would.
And as suddenly as the doubt came, it passed. Rarity's eyes snapped open and she smiled at the counselor. Who let out a held breath the same time I did. "Thank you, Spring. Now come along Bruce - let's get home."
"Huh?" Back to your old self again I take it, brain?
"Uhm, aren't I supposed to be in bed or something?" The cool night air made me shiver a bit as Rarity led me through the hospital doors. It was fairly late from the looks of things. The hospital was lit electrically (or magically) but the way the lights of the nearby town twinkled in the twilight hours told me that it was a special circumstance of some sort. The steady glow of the waiting room seemed so modern compared to the more rustic look of the surrounding buildings but for some reason, I was drawn more towards the town than the building behind me. No matter how much the hospital should have reminded me of home, there was something that didn't feel right about it.
The town winked at us in the distance and we both paused at the edge of the pool of light from the overheads. Ponyville was serene and peaceful and for a moment, I could forget. It was just me. Just me and a rustic little farm town ... and I just knew something bad was going to happen. I gave Rarity a questioning look and tried valiantly to suppress a yawn. "Ahhh-ya know, diphtheria and all that?"
"Oh no, Bruce." Rarity glanced in my direction before turning her eyes back towards the darkness. "The doctors' cleared that up - purging spells are wonderful when they are available. True, you'll be slightly contagious for a few days but the worst of it is over. And thank the Pastures. Hospitals are always so icky."
"Icky?" That was what I focused on - 'icky.' Not the unknown spells that these crazy doctors threw at me. Nope, 'icky.' Still on that ball.
"Well, the sickness and germs and such. Icky." Again with the mane-fluff. I was growing suspicious of her a bit - she seemed aware of her own quirks. Even slightly embarrassed by them. I didn't get the same 'off' feeling that Derpy had given me but it was a bit strange. She knew how silly she was being sometimes but couldn't help herself.
"Riiight. So, what was that about the doc-"
"Hey Bruce?" A familiar pink pony popped in from the darkness no more than two steps away - giving both Rarity and I a start. Ok, Rarity had a start, I had a yelp. A girly yelp. And I refuse to confirm or deny if I temporarily hid between her legs.
After the excitement died down - and my heart rate had returned to semi-normality - I could tell something was wrong. There was a tension. Rarity was standing a bit stiff and Pinkie's normal exuberance ... I couldn't help but focus on her. She looked a bit sad but the smile on her face was warm regardless.
"Pinkie, what ever are you doing out so late at night?" Rarity gave her a quick nuzzle which was returned a bit hesitantly. Pinkie shuffled on her hooves nervously before replying. Her posture was hunched.
"I was hoping to say goodbye to Bruce." The way she said that, it was like her puppy had died. Her hair wasn't as curly as it normally should have been and even Rarity's face fell a bit. She wasn't 'crushed' but she was sad. Pinkie Pie was sad. Again. Good job Bruce! "I hate it when I have to say goodbye to friends."
That would not stand! I joined the pair of mares, took a deep breath ... and hugged the pink party pony. "It's not goodbye, Pinkie." I felt her tense in my arms before going a bit slack and returning the hug. "It's 'see you later.'"
"Thanks Bruce." The thanks was much appreciated but the kiss on my forehead was a little much. And the scrubbing I was giving the area sent her into giggles. "I - I hate saying goodbye so much. I'm sor-"
"No." I pulled back from her chest and looked her dead in the eye with as much seriousness as I could muster. It wasn't much but it was there. "You didn't do anything wrong Pinkie - I did. And I'm sorry. Sorry that I hurt you, sorry that I hurt the Cakes, sorry th-"
I trailed off as Pinkie renewed her hug. And then Rarity joined in. No more mistakes, Bruce. These are pony's lives, not random characters in a bad fanfiction. We stood like that for a short time until Pinkie pulled away. Hey, I managed to hug Pinkie into submission! That's something off my bucket list. I looked up and while she still seemed sad, she wasn't so grim. She gave me another quick squeeze and Rarity a wave before pronking out into the night. For a pony so bright, she sure could blend into the darkness far too well. Her humming gave her away though.
I stood for a minute as the night breeze blew past me. It smelled like ... well, like dirt with a hint of grass clippings. But it was clean and it was pretty fresh. Rarity's voice pulled me from trying to wax poetic on the night again.
"That was rather nice of you Bruce." I didn't turn to look at her but I could hear the smile in her tone. I shrugged back, still wanting to go on about how fresh everything seemed. That and I didn't want to ruin the moment by opening my mouth - though a yawn escaped for the second time that night. Eventually, she walked over and nudged me. "Come along, it's rather late."
With that, we both trotted into the darkness - the darkness of a fresh, new start. Of potential and unending possibility. Of a new chance. Of the sky right before dawn.
"Ow! Sonnuva-" And apparently of hard-to-see fences.
The walk from the hospital had been slightly awkward. I hadn't had time to broach the subject of the Princess again. Well, I had the time but no idea how to do it after my string of invectives. And it didn't help I was in hot water for my language once again.
"I already said I was sorry." I was pouting and I knew it. After my 'little stumble' and the string of colorful language that followed, Rarity had insisted I turn in as soon as we got to her Boutique. It wasn't that bad really. She didn't yell, she didn't get upset - though her face did turn a delightful shade of pink at the 'son of a whore' part - she was just forceful and insistent.
I just didn't want to go to bed yet. As I said, pouting.
"Yes, and I appreciate that Bruce. But you must learn more self-control." Rarity shook her key a few times in my general direction before she turned back and resumed her search for the keyhole.
We were standing outside her Boutique and man was it dark. I would have loved to go on about what it looked like but without street lights it just looked like an indistinct blog of slightly-more-dark. That and I was just a wee bit tired from all the excitement that had been happening lately. After a few mumbled words - some of which I'm sure I had used in the 'fence incident' - Rarity 'ah-hah'd and pushed open the front door.
"Welcome to Chateau du Belle!" A flick of a switch and .. was that gas I smelled? Another click and lights burst into being around the periphery. Gas lights. Shaped like prancing ponies. That should set the tone at least.
As close to the show as this place had been, Rarity's Boutique was something ... else. It was larger than the show ever tried to display, that much was certain. The main room was a combination showroom floor and living area - a set of fitting rooms (WHY?! Ponies are naked ALL THE TIME!) and a raised dais looked a bit off near a set of plush overstuffed chairs positioned just so near a fireplace. Mannequins (ponnequins?) with very frilly dresses intermixed with cabinets displaying various bric-à-brac from a busy life, posters and photos showing obvious models next to those old time-y half-color photos of Rarity and her family together on the same shelf ... it was strange. The place where Rarity's work stopped and her home-life began just wasn't there. It all mixed together - her life and her career were one and the same. I lifted a hoof to step in and-
"Ah-ah-ah! Remember our rules, Bruce." Rarity pointed with a hoof at the colorful 'Welcome' mat ('Bonjour' mat, properly) I was standing on and smiled. "Four times on both mats to ensure a clean and happy home!"
I wasn't even in the door yet and already I could smell the trainwreck a'comin'.
I didn't get a good look at the downstairs as Rarity bundled me upstairs as soon as I was 'properly cleaned.' Which meant about a minute of me flailing at the welcome mat. I can walk just fine but trying to do some kind of weird two-step on a small mat ended up with me flat on my face about a half dozen times. Rarity's encouragement didn't help.
Ok, it helped a little.
There was little to the tour - it amounted to 'downstairs, facilities and your room' - and as soon as we had entered 'my' room, I winced. The upstairs matched the ground floor in color and decor - lavender pastel-y walls, white trim, fainting couch. Couches. In fact, it seemed to be-
"I do apologize for the decor, Bruce." Rarity was busy levitating a stack of bed linens out of a closet but she turned to face me as her magic neatly unfolded a set of unfitted sheets. "I know it's not a 'colts room' but this was a bit sudden for the both of us. I promise we'll get something more suited to your tastes soon and we'll turn this old sitting room of mine into a room fit for a proper colt."
"Rarity, the entire town is covered in hearts and pastels," I stepped back as a pillow set floated a bit too close to my head, "it's not that big a deal. I haven't lost my diii-"
"What was that darling?" Everything stopped in mid flight. She knew what I was going to say but I hadn't said it yet. I swallowed my normal word-choice down and tried again.
"I, uhm, I can get used to it." And as suddenly as everything had stopped it all started back up again. The twin couches and coffee table were floated over against a wall - one at a time as Rarity grunted a bit with the effort - while a fold-out bed was set up and covered in lace-trimmed satin sheets.
Yes, satin. Real silk satin, not that polyester crap that passes itself off as satin. I ran a hoof over it as Rarity busied herself in tucking away some odds and ends behind me. It was soft, light and really well made. As an aside, feeling things with a hoof is super weird. They're like giant fingers except harder and the nail is on the bottom instead. No, I still don't know how it works. Magic.
"Yes," Rarity said, making me jump slightly in surprise at her sudden voice, "a very nice set of clean sheets for the tired little colt."
I tried to protest but a yawn caught me off guard at the 'But' part. And without a second thought, Rarity ... magicked me up to lift me into bed. I got half an inch off the floor before I could react. I have to say, it was perhaps the most calm and gentle reaction known to pony-yes, I panicked!
"AHHH!" With flailing hooves and a scream of terror I panicked. There was much panic. Not only was I being hefted above the ground but I didn't even have the comfort of a nose in my crotch to let me know I wasn't in danger of plummeting to my death! All of ... an inch to my death but still - I might be a little scared of heights. Just a bit.
Thankfully, my terrified scream broke Rarity's concentration and I fell the small distance to the floor. I managed to catch myself gracefully with only a small stumble but me bolting under the bed was entirely unintended. I blame instinct.
"Bruce!" Rarity yelled, her head peeking under the bed and her face full of concern. "I am so sorry!" I looked back at her with a perfectly normal and cautious face. A bit wide eyed but normal regardless. Rarity clucked her tongue at me and she sighed.
"Are you okay Bruce?" I nodded as well as I was able, taking a deep breath to calm my racing heart. Stupid unicorns grabbing things willy-nilly - haven't they ever heard of personal space? Before she could continue, I waved her back a bit and crawled out from under the cot-thing.
"Warn me next time please, Miss Rarity." I may have been a bit colder than I should have been - but in my defense she startled the living daylights out of me. The way her face fell a bit at my tone didn't even register in my mind. "I don't like being manhandled -er, 'ponyhandled' without being warned."
Rarity sighed and nodded. "Marehandled. And I will do my best, Bruce. I cannot promise I won't snatch you out of danger's way without warning, however."
"Well, that's fine I suppose." I shook like a dog - ponies do that I hope - and cleared my throat. "I might scream again but I can't blame you for that."
We stood there in awkward silence for a bit - me pointedly not looking at my new foster mother and her fluffing her mane and not looking at me. A perfect end to a perfect day.
"C-can I help you to bed, Bruce?" Rarity's question was expected but I didn't know how to respond. I kept my face turned from her as I thought, 'hmm'ing to let her know I wasn't saying no. Beds had given me trouble since the first day I had been in Equestria and I had no reason to believe this cot was going to be any different. But Rarity's help would involve me flying through the air under her power and I was still really nervous about that. You know, being completely and totally under someone else's control and all.
I swallowed a strange lump in my throat.
"Be gentle." Ok, that sounded a lot better in my head. Actually, with that, I managed to make an already awkward situation just a tad bit more creepy. I snapped my eyes to her wide-eyed and shocked face. "I mean, the magic! And - floating. Not, no. Not that! I didn't mean it like that!"
We both lapsed into silence again. I pawed at the ground nervously while in the background, I heard a clock somewhere give a long series of happy chimes. Ten o'clock. It was later than I had realized. The sound was accompanied by a slow exhalation from Rarity.
"No magic, Bruce." Before I could wonder about why she specified that, she tucked her nose up under my barrel and pushed me up off the ground. Again with the sudden 'marehandling' but I was more ready for it then I had been for magic-floaty-adventure. She grunted a bit - rather unladylike - but between an instinctual twist from me and her freakin' weirdly strong neck muscles, she managed to get me deposited safely on the cot. A flurry of mouths and hooves later and I was tucked under the sheets.
"Comfy Bruce?" I nodded at her question, though my front hooves seemed to have a mind of their own as they clutched and released the precisely folded edge of the sheet. Nervousness tinged with fear. My mind was cataloging my own body language - perfect. She noticed but said nothing, motioning towards the door with a soft smile. "My room is further down the hall to the left outside of your room. Come get me if you need anything."
And then she leaned down and kissed my forehead before walking out the door and flicking the lights off as she left. She stood at the door, framed in the hall lights for a moment - a grey pony shape against a bright lavender backdrop.
"Good night Bruce. Sweet dreams." She had closed the door and was gone by the time my mind had started again.
"And we are off to a fan-fucking-tastic start. And I'm not even all that tired."
I was asleep within minutes.
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It still lives!
Holy ponies, an update!
EDIT: This actually seems like a promising relationship. Something will happen of course, but it seems like those two can get over any issues they have. Aside from Sweetie's crush that is. It will probably get really... interesting when that subject comes up.
Its alive!!!
Oh, Bruce... I almost feel really sorry for you because your author let you go through all that... almost. I hope you can get along with Rarity.
Bruce seems to have chilled out a tad and started being more honest to himself. I hope that means he and Rarity can stay in a good relationship, she's shown to be quite sweet for a mare.
Now we wait for the next big event in the story...
When shall he meet the princess (or get in contact with her?)
It is nice to see the old soap scrubbing again. At least this time Bruce did it in his own consent. Love the goodbye hug and kiss with Pinkie. The mother son bonding between Bruce and Rarity ending with a good night kiss is endearing.
Bruce is adorable. Forget my little dashie, I want my little brucie!
just make him human already so he can shove it in their faces especially all the doctors
img.4plebs.org/boards/tg/image/1366/80/1366801254329.jpg
and read this story
lol this update was a bit of good news amongst the large amounts horrible news ive been recieving lately
Its alive...
ITS ALIVE!
Looks it is off to a okayish start despite the setbacks. Still has to plot how to get to celestia and way back home though.
Some smiles show cheer, others are merely meant to show teeth.
To have a creature show off such human like gestures and attitudes, that you can recognize that they're smiling. Yet, have them look so alien, that it still looks like it's just bearing it's teeth at you sounds pretty unnerving.
Thanks for the chapter.
4343801 You know I keep wondering that myself, I'm sure it will come. I can understand wanting to prolong that, especially as a writer. He know by introducing Bruce to Celestia that it would be the beginning of the end for the story, maybe he isn't sure what to do though? It can be tough to not rush things, or maybe he just wants to write this story forever until the site dies
who knows? 
4343787
My eyes!
They bleed!
Also loved this chapter, nice opening for Rarity shenanigans
Glad to see an update. I do wonder how you're gonna deal with the relationship between Bruce and Sweetie Bell since they're gonna spend a whole lot more time with them.
Jesus, Bruce. It's almost like you want to ruin any possible chance in heaven or hell that you'll get home again!
Oh yeah...
4343841
What, and miss all the delicious, agonising torture?
You're no fun at all, if I might say so my friend.
Oh, man. For a second, there, I thought you were having somepony wash Bruce's mouth out again. I was very relieved when I realized he did it to himself, this time
4343801 Hopefully before he kills Luna by existing. And channels her pony soul. And her Alicorn. I don't want to see Alicorn Bruce - that would be bad.
You know, I think Bruce is the epitome for self-fulfilling prophecy. He's the the one who always causes everything to go wrong because he believes it's going to go wrong... and he is a bit of an idiot.
Anyway, about the meeting the princess thing, it shouldn't be too hard for him to convince the ponies to set up a little meeting. There are two sets of variables (human/not human, meet Celestia/not meet Celestia) to account for that can come together to form four outcomes. 1) Not human and don't meet Celestia= he goes through the rest of his life not believing he is a pony and thus never settling down and living a normal life. 2)Not human and meet Celestia= She puts his fears to rest, only wasting (warning: use this word only if you are heartless.) a little of her time and he finally starts to come to terms the fact that he is a pony and begins to move on with his life. 3) He is a human and he does not meet Celestia= He forever remains separated from his family and they never know what happened to him. 4)He is a human and meets Celestia= She sends him back home to his family.
Totaled up, not going to see Celestia causes the worse problems.
With the information available to him, he should be able to make a logically sound argument to get what he wants. Of course, there are things he is not aware of, like how Luna is the cause of his situation and that Celestia already knows about him and is just taking her sweet time bringing him in for a chat herself. As for his situation, I have a few theories.
Luna was trying to make a son, messed up and either A) pulled a soul from a another world for the body, somehow damaging herself in the process, or B) Fragmented her own soul, thus putting herself into a coma and the fragment into the body, resulting in her own fantasy world to manifest as Bruce's beliefs. This brings us to other options. Luna is the real writer of the human books and really was trying to peer into the world that so spookely matched her imagination. An accident caused her to summon Bruce and stuff his soul into some unsuspecting racist earth pony. The fact that Bruce is inexplicably racist towards unicorns lends credence to that.
4344196 Yay for DBZ Abridged!
4344214 Don't you see it? He's been Chris Farley all along! The man faked his death to settle down into a life of obscurity and is now in Equestria!
4344147 I hope he doesn't go through the rest of the Mane6. This story updates way too slow and I really do just want to see it wrap-up sometime this decade. If he goes through another four homes, we'll be lucky to see this finished by the end of this century.
4344656 I would like to think the author has a bit more tact than that, but the fact that Celestia has found it prudent to sit back and do nothing while Bruce flounders like a chimpanzee suffering from tourettes thrown in the ocean makes me worry a little. You'd think she would at least send a message to Twilight about this. It wouldn't even need to have any condemning information about Luna's probably illegal actions in it. Though, perhaps she is just waiting to see if he really is the one she's looking for.
4345040 Well, taking into account the fact that she already know about Bruce because of her spy, Derpy, a letter is unneeded.
I enjoyed this chapter. IMO you did a good job with the interaction between Bruce and Rarity.
I get the distinct feeling that THE FRILLS will soon make a comeback...
Alright, so if this theme of "Bruce starts to get used to staying with a member of the mane six, and then something happens that makes him move in with another one." keeps up, I'm gonna guess it'll be Sweetie Belle's fault. Or Bruce's fault. Or Rarity realizing her sister's crush on the "sexually abused" colt, as they believe, could stir up an insane amount of trouble for everyone involved.
Applejack would be the next best choice, I guess. After that...I can't decide which fits more, Fluttershy or Twilight for last. On one hand, Fluttershy lives near the spooky dangerous forest all alone and probably has no experience in living with a colt as "damaged" as they believe he is. On the other hand, she is the Element of Kindness, and Twilight lives in a tree, is their ruler's personal student, and would have even less experience than Fluttershy would have gotten from taking care of her animals.
I can't see him living with Rainbow Dash. Mostly the whole "can't walk on clouds" thing.
This was a cute little chapter with the right amount of seriousness and plot transition and with some much needed humor added in as well. I approve heartily. If I had a good man-beard, I'd be stroking my luscious locks in satisfaction. I can't, so I'll just scratch my butt and go grab dinner instead.
That scene with Pinky was actually pretty touching.
Here's hoping that the relationship with Rarity goes well. It's very much in Bruce's hooves to screw it up or not, he's kind of running out of excuses to blame things on the unfamiliar culture.
This was nice. Started to show the relationship with Rarity and I shall look forward to what comes next.
I normally don't re-read stories when finished but once this one is done, I'm going to make an exception. This is still my favorite story on the site at the moment and I don't think that will ever change. :)
-Reader Out-
Well, I know a string of colorful words that aren't against any morality practices:
"Son of a gum-chewing funk monster! Why the fruit does all this funny stuff happen to me? Forget my life! Always surrounded by these miserable failing clods. It's like this whole world just wants to bend me over and find me in the Alps, like I'm some sort of slock receptacle. Well as far as I care, these miserable cows can have a fancy barbeque with a gun-tanned pig!"
...
So, long story short, good chapter.
did Bruce turn into Chris Farley for a second?
Yay! Update!
4344132 Knowing Rarity, it will be coming. Here's how I picture the scenario.
On his first day at school, Bruce is about to leave when Rarity stops him. Bruce then sees the outfit Rarity made for him. Bruce tries to run but is caught by Rarity's magic slowly dragging him. Bruce then kicks, screams, begs, and squirms in a futile attempt to escape his glamorous fate. Then Bruce has a scowl look for the rest of the day.
4344073 OK you got me their... but think of all the possibilities he turns human while he's alone the 1. first thing he does strut down the street 2. flips everypoyny off 3. singing a song like a drunken moron of something having to do with victory, these are just a few ideas...
or you could have him turn into human any time he wants and hide it like a super hero
he needs to have a friend use button mash because he has video games.
For some reason i just love stories that have fun inner monologue have a fave!
Even putting this in a human context, he's seriously still very much a spazz. A child that screams when touched/floated has deeper issues, and they'll have to be dredged up eventually.
yay! update
I rather enjoyed this chapter for the characterization of a more mature but still seemingly cannonesque Rarity. I especially loved her making him little socks with unicorn knitting hooks. That image was far too funny. Well done~
Just... Lulz.
That's not Rarity's name, why does everyone think that
Hope he's learned from the clusterfuck that was the Cakes.
4343787 Damn you. That was so loud that it blew out my computer speakers. Not to mention I live in an apartment building. Suddenly having the windows rattle from sheer volume does nothing to help with sleeping neighbors. Warn people next time. You owe me new speakers. Bastard.
Good
Well this looks fun, let's read.
Yes..... An update.
I look forward to Bruce in socks and the other getups Rarity undoubtedly has planned for him.
You know, I don't think Bruce will ever manage to get back home. The problem is his body and apparent age. The adult ponies refuse to see him as anything but a 'mentally damaged colt with a bad past' because they are adults meaning they know best. He's either going to succumb to their influence and eventually believe he is a colt with a damaged past or run away to never be seen again.
4344196
You sir have just won an Internet, use it wisely.
4344576 Eh, the cliche would suggest that the princess take just long enough to show up for him to get used to the idea of being a child again, at which point she'll appear go "nope, hes a human" and wreck/fix/confuse everything for everyone.
You know you like a story when you see it in the featured box and exclaim in delight.
God damn, made me snicker. First time too, I think.