Interlude 4: Parabola Parable
Warning! Drastic tone shift ahead.
The early evening air felt thick on her withers, heavy with the sounds and smells of life. It was a distant, droning noise from below - as if some ancient beast slumbered but fitfully not far from her. The smells of pony and animal, of freshly cut grass and flowers too early in bloom wafted from all directions. And, as always, the ever-present wind that whipped itself in a frenzy from the mountain top. A whistling in her ears - the breath of the mountain. She could feel it as it wound its way through the alabaster spires that surrounded her. Through the streets and the avenues filled with perfumed dames and their stallions, through the filthy alleys that overflowed with the refuse of life, through the lungs and mouths of ten million creatures - large and small. For a moment, she felt as if she truly was the goddess she was said to be. For a moment, she was free.
The snap of an eagle's claw from inside and the faint smell of cotton candy hiding the scent of ozone - and worse - drew her out of her reverie and she almost collapsed onto the balcony at her body's sudden weight. Sad magenta eyes opened and regarded the city below her and she felt her will waver. She couldn't face him yet. Instead, she looked out over the city as it lay beneath her. Spires and arches, sky-bridges and towers. Even the slums that her ponies tried so hard to disguise with cheery paint and an army of sweepermares. The blindingly white and gold city that had been carved in her name. Her 'city on a hill.' Her city. That errant thought brought to mind a thousand years of regret. She remembered the confusion on her sister's face as she finally gazed on the ruins of their once glorious home. Her mind unfettered by the nightmare that had consumed her, the desolation that was once the most important location in all of Equestria broke her more fully than anything the Elements could have done. The 'city Celestia built' was such a change for her, such a change.
"I haven't got all day, Celestia." His voice hadn't changed in all those thousands of years, however. It still dripped with hate, with the venom of old wounds that would never heal. Despite his 'reformation,' Discord had never forgiven her for her crimes. Could never forgive her those crimes. That fact she could bear - if she was not alone. "Or night, as it soon will be."
"Sta-" she began, her voice also unchanged despite the vast gulf of time between them. Desperate. Pleading. Hurt.
"Ah." Though she had not yet turned to face him, she could 'see' him hold one claw up to forestall her words. She closed her eyes and mouthed along with him. "That name is dead and buried, Celestia."
His words hung in the air. She did not want to say it, she did not want to say it, she wanted him back, she wanted it all to be different and better and why couldn't it be the way it once was and damn it all why did she have to be so alone and she just wanted him back and-
"Discord." That word broke her. Her voice remained even and her mask remained whole but each time she said it - each time she thought it - she died again and again until all that remained was a hollow shell wearing the skin of a pony with the serenely smiling mask of a Princess.
"There's a good filly." Their ritual complete, a moment of silence lay between them. She could smell the sickly sweet stench of candy and feces that clung to his fur as it drifted out of her small office. Two smells, so discordant. The smells of him as it always had been since that night so long ago. It grew stronger until she could almost taste the intermixed flavors. Her nostrils flared. It was an effort of will to simply stand and breathe. His hot breath on her ear was unsurprising. That it smelled of mint and chocolate instead of blood and meat was. "Aren't you going to lower the sun and get the moon into position or should I?"
With an irritated flick of her head and a sharp burst of light from her horn, Celestia almost wrenched the stellar orb down from where it sat just above the distant Smokey Mountains. The sudden lurch of the sun as it fought against her desire stopped her from yanking it below the horizon too quickly but for just a fraction of a second, she struggled and yanked with all her might against it. A single chuckle from beside her stopped her war of wills and reminded her of her audience. With bowed head and a faint blush of shame for her lack of strength, she lowered the raging beast gently beyond the edge of the world and set it on its path in the proper order of things. With another flick, the moon began its accent into the sky. It would be hours until she need worry of those two.
"Bleh." She finally turned to him as he eyed the positioning of the moon critically. His eagle claw stroked his goat's beard as his lion's paw sat pensively on his 'hip.' One leg - his goat leg - tapped a non-rhythm as he watched the sky while his other - his lizard leg - supported his weight. "It would look better doing loops across the sky."
"Thank you, Discord." The smell was almost too much, like an opened sewer left to rot too long in the sun. A few millennia of dealing with worse creatures than him helped ensure her mask stayed as solid as it had ever been, however, and she smiled gently at him. His surprise was an added bonus but that was not why she had spoken those words. "For coming on such short notice. It is a distance even for you to travel."
His surprised face sunk into a wary sneer as he weighed her words. Eventually, he shrugged. "If it was you I'd have taken my time, you know. Little Lulu deserves better." Spiraling his serpentine body in the air, the self-proclaimed 'Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony' backstroked back through the purple gauze curtains that separated the outside air from Celestia's inner office. For her part, she ignored his antics and simply walked in, settling herself on the well-worn cushions near the unlit fireplace.
"So, somepony finally did it, hmm?" From above, Discord 'swam' through the air with a skill born of boredom. The smell was atrocious but the opened window helped - Celestia fought her own gorge as it struggled to empty. Always wearing the mask - even when it broke and cracked like so much ice in spring. Even when it hid nothing. Discord huffed at her serene smile. "There was a reason I never finished those spells, dear Celestia. They were too much for us to handle even with our -" He paused.
The air felt thick as history filled the room. Sounds of laughing foals, of joyful discovery and the halfhearted taunts of the lovestriken. Of a herd of ponies enjoying the summer sun and the spring moon, together. Always together. Pegasus, earth pony and two unicorns frolicking their lives away as the smells of daisies filled the air. Finally, a spell to make time itself stand still and the awe of the world. And then, the smells of war. The sounds of pain, of rape. Fear. Hate. Anger. Jealousy. A spell half-finished and done in hatred. And a completed spell, done in secret and for love - a love broken beyond repair. The air itself was broken with a pop like glass shattering and Discord wiped a lion's claw on his matted fur.
"I hate backstory. As I was saying." Celestia blinked at the draconequus as the smells of war and death, of sewage and worse disappeared as though they had never been there in the first place. Instead, Celestia smelled ... rabbit. And wildflowers. And a mare's scent she knew, a pegasus of patience and heart. Discord, now sitting in a high-backed chair of minotaur design next to a suddenly roaring fireplace, puffed gently on a pipe as he regarded a claw absentmindedly. He was very close to her, she noted. So very close that she could still smell the stallion sweat that she remembered from before, when all the world was so much simpler. "There are reasons I hid much of my work after I died. You should never have collected it, Celestia." Gone was the hatred for a moment. Just a moment. Her mask almost cracked as she said the words they both knew were coming. As she pretended not to see the pleading look he was trying to hide so poorly.
"And if another pony had found it?"
"Then they could join me."
"Discord, you know I couldn't-"
"YOU! You, you, you, you, you, YOU, YOU!" The smell of sewage filled the air once more as the spirit leapt to his claws, his face filled with age old rage. The fireplace was cold once more and gone was the chair. The closeness. "It's always about you and these ponies. Always them, never me." His voice was barely a whisper as he finished. She turned her head to not see the shivering form.
"~Always all of us. Ever and forever.~" Her voice cracked as she recited the ancient Equuish phrase that nopony alive remembered - save for three very distant and very hurt ponies that struggled to remember the unimportant moments that defined everything.
"~Till death take one.~" Discord's voice was quiet but firm. The smell of rot and foulness was not so heavy but it was still there. Always there. Outside, one of the many clockspires of Canterlot struck the moonrise hour. The two immortals passed the time in silence. Discord's quiet voice broke both the silence and her heart. "I cannot help her, Celestia. She is beyond my grasp." Celestia nodded. The mask lay broken at her hooves, its droplets forming small pools of wasted hopes on the cold and hard floor. "And the child?" Celestia sighed at his question.
"She chose a different path. For now."
"Pity." They both let words lay as they mulled over their own thoughts. They would have stayed that way for an eon of time had they the opportunity. Alas, time doesn't wait for any - no matter how powerful. A sudden rapping at the chamber door caused their heads to snap up. The elaborately carved oak doors swung on silent hinges inward and a guard, shivering at the coolness of his Princess's chambers, stepped slowly into the dark. His eyes were wide at first with trepidation but he visibly relaxed as the bright form of his Princess slowly faded into view from the dark.
"Y-your highness?" His voice broke as the leering form of Discord sulking in the shadows hovered into view as well. No matter the training, no creature could stand unchanged near the lord of change. The metal plates on his golden armor rattled as the draconequus slid and slithered around the petrified guard, sniffing just loud enough to be heard.
"Mmm, you always did have a good eye for the stallions, Cccelessstia." He drew out his 's's with the flare of an actor and was rewarded with a small yellow puddle that quickly changed into a fizzy brown one. With a chuckle that was darker than the room, Discord left the white-faced guard as Celestia shot him an angry glare. "Calm yourself, I wouldn't hurt a fly."
"Aegis, please report." The soothing and firm voice of his Princess snapped the guard out of his nightmares and back to reality. He closed his eyes and thought only of the eternal twin beauties he was charged with defending. His will renewed and his resolve set - and with only a second glance at the looming beast - the grey pegasus saluted his commander.
"Your highness, you requested hourly reports. Ah, th-there is no change in her 'condition.' I'm sorry." The guard dropped the pose as his Princess nodded with a heavy sigh. None could blame her, though the news had yet to travel outside of the castle proper. The servants and guards knew well how to keep a secret but it was only time borrowed unless a cure could be found.
"Thank you, Captain. Please, leave us now." With another salute, the guard turned tail and almost ran from the room. It would take days to get the smell of cotton candy and soda out of his armor but he was thankful to Discord for that one change. He couldn't imagine smelling like a sewer near his liege.
"We must find the thing she pulled through," Discord hissed as his anger overrode him. His form began to twist as he snaked through the air, forgoing even the appearance of swimming. Celestia could smell his anger. His hatred. She fought back a gag. "And it must be ended lest she waste away."
"We shall see. There may yet be another way."
"Hmmph," Discord scoffed, "I can see all possibilities, Celestia. I cannot see this 'other way.'"
"You know me, Discord."
"You would truly lose her over some half-formed creature from beyond?" The words of her informants filled her heart with dread. Colt, pony, hurt, frightened. Lost. She would not sink to that level again. She would never sink to that level again.
"I would rather lose her than be soaked in unnecessary blood." As the words left her lips, the scent in the air cleared itself. She glanced at Discord as he hung, suspended above her. Staring with his bright yellow eyes - eyes she once knew. She had so loved his eyes.
"My, my. That is a change." His voice was so low, had she not had practice it would have been missed. She looked away from his sneering grin - from his hatred - and stood as regally as the situation allowed. She did not flinch as his tail slowly caressed her back, she did not whinny in need and want as it became a hoof that trailed in a way she had not felt in thousands of years. She simply smiled and nodded gracefully at him.
"Thank you again, Discord. I trust you to find your own way out." Her mask was returned and the snake in the air above her hissed in irritation.
"Of course, Celestia." With that, the draconequus touched the floor once more to give his customary mocking bow.
"Oh, and Discord?" Before he rose, Celestia stopped him with a gentle and trembling hoof to his chin, drawing his yellow and red eyes to meet her own. "While you were always handsome as a stallion, I do not mind you as you are."
"I would have loved to have heard that before ... all this, Celes- Celly." For a moment, his eyes seemed to change. Blue - the clear blue of a sky at noon - in a sea of pure white. For a moment. Then, with the smell of fresh daises and the sound of laughing foals, he was gone.
And once more she was alone.
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Y'all might want to take a bit of a break after this one.
EDIT: Humor will return next chapter.
Man I hate Drastic tone shifts.
I feel nothing
2809545
Sorry. As I said, humor returns next chapter. I think I've been a bit down lately - it leaks into my writing.
2809549
Well, I wrote it in a bit of loneliness. This was started before I had my fan-gasm. I feel a bit better now, time to get back to the actual point of this story - the funny.
2809528
No thanks, I'm good
NOW MORE!!!
Wow, I can't wait till Bruce finds out what Celestia knows and why he was brought to Equestria, I can only wonder if his reaction would be anger or pity towards her.
Apologies if I'm misunderstanding, but Luna pulled Bruce through? Doing magic that Discord left unfinished?
...just
Luna, really... though I'm tickled to think of Twilight's reaction to all of this.
Twilight: Princess, this colt believes that he's an adult human who has been brought into our world throu-
Celestia: Oh, so this is the one Luna brought through. Yeah, he's telling the truth.
Twilight: Hamajig what?
ooooh man that went pretty damn dark
Is Luna a former human, who never quite fit in?
Tool song, neat. I picked up the bass guitar because of The Pot.
A drastic tone shift can mean only one thing! "Marty, get the delorean!"
2809556
I ... I'm not 100% done? Like, 99% - it'll be up within a day or ... two? And the next one after that soon after (this week definitely), so this isn't going to be 'three in a row' like I wanted (bad scheduling on my part) but close to it. It was my fault entirely. Nonspoiler: I wanted this to be the LAST one I posted!
2809580
Well, that assumes it was on purpose.
2809583
There are reasons. Bad, silly ones - unbecoming of a Princess. But reasons.
2809590
Read the lyrics - you'll find them pretty apt.
2809585
I was going more for 'lonely' - not really wanting the 'Dark' tag. Ohhhh shit, do you think this is dark like that? Oh fuck, maybe I should take this out into a side story?! OH SHIT!
2809593
... huh? Is it bad? This was a bit experimental on my end. Should I explain it in the AN so it doesn't seem that dark?
EDIT: Bedtime, I hope people stick around because it really doesn't stay all deep and depressing like this - really, it doesn't!
That was ..... Different
In a good way
The plot thickens
No its not bad silly
Sorry if I made you worry 
. I was playing BTTF The Game from Tell Tale and I wanted more sillyness in this chapter but they can't all be like that. Personally I'm worried about my own stories shifting tones because both of them are about to do this drastic tone shift for a single chapter or two. And I don't want my readers thinking its all dark and gloom always. 2809604
Saw "minotuar" instead "minotaur". Also, finally some answers, very unexpected answers. Maybe this backstory of yours even answers why Luna turned to Nightmare Moon.
Woah, that's some Deep stuff right there.
DUDE. I was gonna go to bed just now. I've got work tomo... actually, no, it's today. And you decided to update your stupid awesometastic story. Shame on you.
2809528 but when can we expect the next chapter I want more Bruce
I'm going to guess the Discord used to be Starswirl The Bearded.
2809528
Given your track record of gaps between chapters, we've got no choice.
I wonder what Luna plays in all of this. It has to be more than just pulling Bruce through. Also that was dark Celestia, letting Luna die before killing something else. Probably not even true sisters...
Hmm, interesting development. It seems like Bruce is about to be thrown into the fire. Also, who was it that first came up with the idea that Discord was once Starswirl?
this needs more chapters good sir, bloody great by the way
2809706
Or he could just be Stan. Can never be too sure.
Four ponies. Celestia, Luna and Starswirl. Who was the earth pony then?
Okay, judging by the inclusion of "interlude", I'm really hoping that most of this was filler, especially the not-very-subtle implication of Discord being Starswirl, which I seriously cannot stand; I suppose I'll be able to bear it if it remains in the background, but if it becomes important to the story, I won't be able to go on, which would really be unfortunate because I love this story for its funny and interesting perspective on Equestria, not this... what-this-is.
wow, you just threw like 40 different potential dark side stories there to explain what all happened between discord and celestia. i need a crap ton of lore just to explain what all just happened.
So we got someone dying, most likely luna, something about a child as well. Also, maybe killing bruce (another 'child') is possibly the key to fixing some dangerous and urgent situation? wow, yeah there's a train wreck in my brain right now. need to go take a break. and maybe borrow some of my sister's rum right now...
I have always pitied Celestia - watching everything grow, just to die around her.
Bruce's future seems a bit bleak....
poor Bruce
Huh, never seen a story establish Discord as Starswirl the Bearded, and also establish a past romantic relationship between him and Celestia. Which also means she was in a romantic relationship with Starswirl.
Three things done in one chapter that it takes other stories like forty to even hint at.
You ever wonder if Celestia views her subjects like flowers? Trying to make them grow bright and beautiful before they wilt and die at the end of their season?
More chapters!
Loved the new chapter, certainly different from the rest of it, but it's still very good. Can't wait for more!
Huzzah! It has updated! fc01.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/121/6/7/princess_luna___the_fun_has_been_doubled__vector_by_cubonator-d4y66om.png
Well alright then. First thing's first: I will never again read the comments on a fan fiction ever again before making my own. Reason being is that second things are second: After reading the comments on this chapter, I didn't feel like commenting any more. It's like reading them sucked the joy and happiness and smile right out of me. Be that as it may, I will persist. I thought this chapter was great for an experimental first try at 'lonely'. It definitely played on some emotions that hit pretty close to home, for me, and you definitely played both characters well, so far as I could see. Lovely for an interlude, and I would hope to see more of these some time in the future.
Even though it's been said, here's my head canon: Discord is Starswirl, "Her" is Fausticorn. Or something like that. No I don't know what I'm on about, go away
I really feel for Celestia... she spent a great deal of her life .. all alone...
high-backed chair of minotuar design
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
I have NO IDEA
You do realize that this completely makes everything else rather depressing. From the wacky beginning, this has all been one massive, fucked up mistake. Apparently Celestia is on the inexorable path to being completely broken, and just hides it really well.
I'm not sure if I'll be able to forget that now, whenever we get some happy moment I'll be all like "man, that was really happy and sweet, fills you with hope...but you know what? Don't forget that they're all fucked down the line since both rulers are mentally unstable, one of them clearly wearing themselves down, non-stop for centuries. Oh, Discord is still dangerous too, he'd probably only give at least an inkling of a shit if something happened to Fluttershy, but most likely no one else; they can go fuck themselves, or hell, he'd probably join in on spreading the misery if problems ever arose".
On the other hand, this chapter makes your world seem...real. Like ours, it has its shitty ups and its pleasant downs.
2809868
My guess is
Luna was pissing around with some magic discord created but decided wasn't worth the trouble messing with, and Luna ended up pulling Bruce through to Equestria which messed her up, she is getting worse and the cure to Luna’s apparent illness it to kill Bruce… or that’s what Discord thinks anyway.
2809718
I laughed so hard at this, then I died a little inside.
Discord was once a stallion...classic.
Man, I love Drastic tone shifts.
No shit.
Oh um Bruce, you might not being going home...this seems rather bleak.
I enjoyed it.
2809528
I prefer to end the chapter with this:
34 chapters in and still no one believes bruce....
Well ... I must admit, I don't like the drastic tone shift of this chapter. Tone shifts can be warranted in some situations, but on the whole, it just shifts away from what I came here to read. This can work in some cases, like the third season of Avatar, but sometimes it just makes me unnecessarily depressed, like in this case.
Don't get me wrong, I get why you did it, and I'm glad you're feeling better. I've been there myself, so I get writing this chapter. But personally, I would have just up and made a oneshot fanfic separate from everything else.
Now, I'm sure people will hate for not saying "OMG this is teh best evar more plz". So come at me bro, just lemme grab some popcorn.
That was a terrible layout. The chapter itself was just informative, and nothing was really all that entertaining. But I'll wait for the next one.
2811044 If someone started to tell you they were actually a pony from Equestria, would you believe them in a few days/weeks?