• Published 2nd Jul 2012
  • 49,435 Views, 6,268 Comments

Oh to be Old Again - Minalkra



What happens when a middle age brony wakes up in the body of a foal? And when no one believes him?

  • ...
156
 6,268
 49,435

PreviousChapters Next
18 - Impending Frilly Socks

The walk out to the common room was awkward. Mrs. Cake led the way and - I don't know if I've mentioned this but - everything is out for the world to see. Everything. I've adapted though! I kept my gaze fixed on the ground. That's how I didn't notice the lack of crowds, the lack of party music, or lack of staring eyes. Mrs. Cake's sudden stop - and me plowing into her back end - knocked me from my isolation. That's when the quiet hit.

"Uh, where is everyon-pony?" I looked around at the devasta- HOW?! The entire place was so clean it sparkled! The tables that once held all the refreshments were no where to be seen - much to the dismay of my stomach - and even the confetti and balloons were all cleaned up. Not a thing was out of place. If I hadn't just been in here I would have never known there had been a party. My mouth slumped open and I sat down pretty heavily.

"I sent them all home." Spring Meadows smiled at me from across the room. She and a purple-greyish Earth Pony mare I've never seen before stood with Diamond Tiara between them. Other than those - and our little group of three - there was nopony else around. Diamond Tiara had her head-wear back but she was still looking pretty roughed up. I bet I didn't look any better but I still grinned at her. She glared slightly before dropping her gaze to the floor. Bruce: 1, DT: 0, Tie: 1. "I should have guessed a party was an inappropriate way of introducing you to everypony, Bruce."

"Uh, is Pinkie ok?" I grimaced at Pinkie's name. Poor thing, probably drowning her sorrows with ice cream.

"She's a tough mare. She'll be fine." Spring's smile was not as convincing as she probably wanted it to be. Her eyes flicked toward the stairway slightly and her ears drooped slightly. Yup, worst pony. "But this is Mrs. Rich," she motioned with her head toward the purple-greyish mare, "and there is somepony here that has something to say."

She and Mrs. Rich both looked at Diamond Tiara who was staring at the ground with a very big and unhappy frown. Mrs. Rich nudged her with a hoof and a frown of her own.

"Diamond Tiara?" Her voice was very ... cold. Almost harsh. Yeek, with a mother like that, I'd have turned to bullying myself. Diamond Tiara winced at her mother's voice, glancing up at me with both anger and a little trepidation. She cleared her throat and let loose something I can only describe as 'Flutter-like.'

"I'm sorry for hitting you."

"Huh?" I tilted my head in response. If there had been any other sound in the world just then, I don't think I would have noticed her speaking at all.

"I'm sorry for hitting you."

"Diiiidn't quite catch that." I think she said something about 'he-yah' or something. I leaned forward, trying to catch her words. My ears swiveled towards her, trying to pick up the faintest of sounds.

"I said 'I'm sorry for hitting you'!" Wow, there's the volume! With a wince, I jerked my head back a little and flattened my ears. I rubbed them gently, scowling at Diamond's smirk. Mrs. Rich bopped her daughter on the head with a frown causing Diamond's smirk to disappear.

"Hmmph." That's my ten cents.

"Bruce?" Mrs. Cake looked down at me with a frown and I was suddenly very aware of being next to a tank. I gulped and grinned up at her. She nodded towards the other threesome and quirked an eyebrow.

"Ah, yes, eh, I mean." For a moment I wanted to try the same trick Diamond pulled and mumble my way into shouting in her ear but I didn't think that very wise. Mrs. Rich seemed kinda cushy compared to Mrs. Cake and I didn't want anymore knocks to my head if I could help it. I cleared my throat. "I'm sorry for pushing you."

"Hmmph."

We sat there for a few seconds, neither side willing to break the silence. The tension was beginning to grow and even the adults seemed at a loss as to what exactly to say. Two sides, met in battle first in form and then in will, seeking to dominate by any means neces-

My stomach rumbled very loudly in the pregnant silence. Everypony looked at me and I looked down at my suddenly very hungry belly. With a nervous chuckle, I addressed the gathered warriors.

"Uh, can I get breakfast? I haven't had anything to eat at all today and I feel famished."


I was led into the kitchen by Spring as Mrs. Cake saw the others out. Again, sparkling clean everything. Mr. Cake was sitting at the table, his back to the door and his head in his hooves. He seemed ... sad. Awwww crap, I was feeling absolutely awful. And hungry. But mostly awful. At our entrance, he perked up and looked over his shoulder, giving me a weak grin.

"Hey Bruce, how're you doing?" I walked over to him, Spring watching my progress with her ever-present smile.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Cake." It took an effort of will to look up at him. He had tears in his eyes, the poor fellow. With my new-found knowledge of gender roles, it was like looking up at a mother trying to make the best for her children. Just awful. "I'm sorry I'm so much trouble."

"Oh Bruce, you - you're not trouble." I winced at the stutter in his voice. It's hard to say something you don't believe. He noticed and his face grew pained. "You're not trouble, you've just had a lot of things happen and you don't know how to deal with them." I opened my mouth to say something but my stomach reminded me why we were in the kitchen in the first place. Mr. Cake and I both looked down, him in surprise and me in embarrassment. "Hungry?"

"Uhm, if it's not too much trouble." He chuckled and shook his head, getting up to move into the kitchen-proper.

"So what would you like?"

"Right now?" My stomach growled like an angry beast. "Anything."


One salad later - with the Cakes and Ms. Meadows looking on in surprise at my voracious appetite - I was left alone with Spring while the Cakes discussed something. Probably about me and how horrible a little colt I've been so far. Her bench squeaked as she shifted.

"So, Bruce, how do you like it?"

"Mmmmf?" I grunted a question-sound around the last mouthful of delicious salad. FINALLY, I had a full belly. It does wonders for your attitude when you have something in your stomach.

"The Cakes." She waved her hooves around to indicate everything. "How do you like it here?" With effort, I swallowed the gigantic bite I had taken and looked around with a careful eye.

"A runaway attempt, the crying and gnashing of teeth of stallions and foals, a fight to the death with a filly ... it's ok I guess." I grinned at Spring's smirk. She was trying to look irritated but I knew she found it just slightly funny. She rolled her eyes.

"Yes, well, aside from all that excitement, it seems you and the Cakes are beginning to get along fine." Her smile faded somewhat as a look of concern crept slowly into her face. Ew, get it off! "But, I do worry if this is right for you and their foals. If you need anything - anything at all - I'm going to be checking up on you regularly and you don't need to be afraid to ask me for anything. Or tell me anything, ok?" She reached across the table and gripped my hoof. "Think of me as a really 'cool' friend, ok?"

Ugggh, I could hear the quotes around the word 'cool.' I fought the urge to facehoof. I lost. Spring giggled slightly.

"Yeah, it's fine for now. I'm still devoted to finding a way home though." She winced. Still didn't believe me but at least she didn't say anything. We sat in silence until Mr. Cake came clopping back into the room. He nodded at Spring and, with a sigh of relief, they exchanged places.

"Remember Bruce, I'm here if you need me." With that, she trotted out of the room, leaving me with a slightly nervous Mr. Cake.

"So, Bruce. How are you feeling?" He was trying very hard to hide his unease. His eyes shifted constantly and his grin was a little too forced. I tilted my head at him from across the table. He was going to make me nervous.

"Eh, better. Not so hungry now."

"Good! Good." He cleared his throat. I stared at him with my giant, creepy eyes. He probably didn't think they were all that creepy but, well, just me staring at him with a rather blank expression probably wasn't doing him any favors. "Well, the missus and Pinkie have to open shop and they felt it would be a good idea for you and I to, well, have a bit of time off from that so to speak."

"Oooohkay." Aw crap, I could see where this was going. At least I wasn't going to be enslaved to an oven immediately.

"Yeah, so, well, us and the twins of course."

"...lovely." Yup. Leave the stallion to do 'stallions work' with the kids I guess.

"So! What, uhm, what do you want to do today?"

"Honestly?" I raised my eyebrows. With all the craziness that had been going on, I hadn't had time to think. Much less plan. Uhm, what do kids do? "I have no idea."

"Oh!" He scratched the back of his neck. "Oh, yeah, you are new in town. So, uh, why don't we go to the park?"

"Is that a normal thing for, ergh, colts my age to do?" I lowered my head into my hooves, grimacing at my unfortunate choice of words.

"Sure is bucko!" He was way too excited about this whole thing already. His smile seemed more genuine and his ears perked up. Poor dear. Trying so hard. I shrugged and flicked a wrist offhan-offhoofedly?

"...sure. Why not? What could poss-" My eyes shot open and I clamped both hooves over my muzzle, trying to both stop myself from finishing what I had just tried to say as well as hold in a scream of fright.

"What was that?" Mr. Cake looked at me curiously, his head tilted to one side. I removed my hooves gently and began to look around the room, panicked.

"I didn't finish that sentence! IT DOESN'T COUNT!"

PreviousChapters Next