• Member Since 29th Nov, 2011
  • offline last seen Oct 16th, 2020

PotatoJoe


T

This is a personal continuation of the excellent story " Dear Idiot" by The Descendant. It is not part of his story, but part of a personal reaction I had to it. I have expanded on the events after the end of Dear Idiot, exploring my personal feelings on the narrative.

Now Complete.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 36 )

Damn.
This is beautiful.

45260

Thanks. Anything in particular you felt came out well?

#3 · Nov 30th, 2011 · · · Three ·

Wow. Just wow. Please tell me you have more planned.

45380

See, i've written myself into a corner.

Blueblood is not a very redeemable charecter in THIS story. But the power of the Elements can simply wipe away everything bad, it seems. What would happen if it was used on him? I don't have anything in canon to base it off of. But I want to "make it all better". How do I do that without cheapening things?

You don't get better from some things. Sometimes, people just don't come back. I don't like to face those facts, but it's true.

And theres my problem - I've got too much emotion in me at the moment to finish this. I'm gonna give myself a few days, see what happens.

Glad you liked it.

#5 · Nov 30th, 2011 · · · Three ·

Frankly, I love this Blueblood! He may not realize it but he has become a stone cold Anarchist, and he's proud of it. He had the gall to get right in the face to what amounts to God and flip her the bird. He took one look at Equestria and said "This is BS". He has refused the happy happy joy joy dance and decided to make his own. Is he a greedy jerk, hell yes he is! He's a A-hole, and that's just how he rolls. Celestia needs to learn that "her" ponies are in fact there own ponies.
I hope they can't "FIX" him. :pinkiehappy:

You've taken a hilarious take-down (and it WAS hilarious) and you've made something powerful and meaningful out of it.

I'm not sure if you can carry it on - I know a few ways (namely, have Blueblood experience old memories of what he did wrong, detached, so he may see as others see him, rather than through his own eyes), but even if you don't, leaving it open-ended like this is fitting enough.

45453

Thanks man. The great sting of it is that he's kinda right, ain't it? Coming from somepony like Twilight, this'd be one of those "fix Celestia fics". But from him? It's the ranting of a powerless, petulant child.

45475

I was honestly thinking about just stopping here, so I'm glad you liked that as an ending.

I can't think of a better spot to end this, frankly. It's powerful and leaves Blueblood's fate as an open question instead of a didactic device.

#9 · Nov 30th, 2011 · · · Three ·

This is a very moving piece. Especially so for reasons I'll explain later on.

From what I can gather, Blueblood seems to be pretty much suicidal. He knows he'll kill himself with these excesses, but that's what he wants anyway. If you'll burn either way, be a bonfire, right?
He wants to be left alone- he made that clear inside the maze- but at the same time, not. Perhaps he himself doesn't know what he wants? Other than for everything to stop.

Perhaps it is a form of depression. He's forgotten how to be happy, a long time ago, and only knows ways how to not feel sad, at least for a while. He's not jaded beyond caring what other ponies think of him; If he didn't care about Celestia's opinion, he wouldn't have reacted so stronly to the mentioning of her, and he sure as hell wouldn't have sought her out to witness his self-destruction. After all, he tried to clean up his act for CELESTIA'S sake, not his own. He tried to make HER happy; To him, it wasn't about what he wanted anyway. And since that didn't work, he decided he wasn't worth the effort. He walked up to her and said to her face "I can't be happy, I can't make you happy, my life is meaningless and you can't stand the sight of me, so just end it all so we can finally leave this all behind us."
So, all in all, he's lost on so many levels. He doesn't have friends, he doesn't have any self-respect, he definitely doesn't have the respect of anypony else, least of all aunt(s), he feels he doesn't have a reason for living except to fulfill an official station for aesthetic reasons as much as anything else ("we live, breed, and die just to be perfect little dolls in her castle") and that he HATES.

I really feel sorry for him. 'tis strange, but I am reminded of my own life in a strange, indirect way. There was a time in my life where I felt completely isolated and alone, even though I had friends, even though in hindsight my life wasn't bad. I just felt totally useless. Unwanted, unneeded, unnecessary.I was about ready to jump in front of a train, and looking back the very idea was INSANE. Perhaps that's why I can empathise so much with him, despite never having been a jerk like he is.

45792 The story this is based on, " Dear Idiot", hit me hard because it reminded me of my impotent rage at my little brother, who was caught in the same situation. I'm glad I was able to move someone else and I am gladder that you recovered from your isolation - having seen and been there myself, it's always heartening to know others can relate. Please never fade away.

#11 · Dec 1st, 2011 · · · Three ·

45409

I have a suggestion. The elements could heal his body somewhat (enough to let him live, but not enough for him to forget his past mistakes). Then they could show him the story of his own life...from everyone else's point of view. He could not only see his own actions through the eyes of everyone he's interacted with, but feel what they felt towards him. Rarity, Luna, and (to cap it all off) Celestia have all had..."situations" because of him. It would be perfect, showing him just how bad he messed up, and just how hard he'd have to work to get through it, and that not all of the consequences could be overcome (I doubt Rarity would ever want to be more than a distant friend at best, for instance), but that he can become a better person.

#12 · Dec 1st, 2011 · · · Three ·

45798

Thank you. Fortunately I had people who pulled me out of it and put me back together. And I'm sorry for what you and your brother went through.

I would like to ask now, though: Was I terribly off mark with my interpretation of Lost Little Pony? Because if I wasn't, I doubt merely confronting him with his past will help.

46236

See above. He didn't strike me as somepony who doesn't realise he's hurting himself and those around him. In fact, he made perfectly clear he knew what the press and his peers and his aunts think of him; And let's not forget, he did try to turn his life around. What he denied was that Celestia wants for him to be happy. Does he really believe that or does he want to believe that? There's some deep deep immature childish resentment burried inside of him. Maybe he latches on to it because he feels it is, for once in his life, totally his own. Feeling sorry for yourself can be dangerous when it overwhelms your life: Those who feel they've nothing to lose are prone to do stupid, destructive things because they've convinced themselves they don't care about the outcome anymore.
He's already told Celestia changing himself to suit her was neither worth the effort nor possible. Perhaps trying to shock him straight might work... But I doubt it. If he truly is to change, it must be because he wants to, for his own sake.

There was something of this in Dear Idiot too, when Celestia told him of his ancestor, and his statue. Hidden between the rants and the insults was, I believe, an honest question: Namely whether he didn't want for ponies to look up to him. Then again, this ancestor ALSO lived a life not of his own control. Celestia was the one who chose his path for him too.

46418 You were pretty much exactly on the mark. It's the kinda thing ya get after being there, ain't it?

I'm not one for a serious story (Comedy kind of guy)
But Damn this story is amazing I didn't think anyone could build on blueblood and actually make me feel anything for him.
But you've made me feel sad for him, Which is quite weird as the only other story to make me feel sad was Spiderses and the was more or less tears for the brain cells lost reading it.

Can't wait for more

#15 · Dec 2nd, 2011 · · · Three ·

46477
/wince
Yeah, pretty much. I can't offer my solution to his problems though; His folks are gone. They can't help anymore.

46536

I feel real stupid right now I missed the complete tag :< sorry

i was really bummed when the first 2 chapters had 0 comments. this makes me feel better. such a work of beauty should never go unnoticed. ive never been through what you and derpsby have experienced, so i cant say i felt everything here that there was to feel. but by celestia, you write a good story. and now im sad because there's no pony emoticons that fit here..

66418 I thank you for your appreciation - you have been working through my fics and this one, my first, is of particular importance to me. I hope I have not saddened you with it - tragedy is meant to move people towards growth and self-realization.

Thank you so much for your comments.

66455 well, i cant let my favorite independent author's work escape me, can i? and don't hope you havent saddened me. sadness is, in a way, a form of happiness for me. oftentimes, id rather cry my eyes out over something like 'final dream of a filly' than laugh. so thank you for writing such a wonderful piece.

Maybe, in this case, the problem is that everyone tried to help Blueblood because he wasn't what THEY wanted him to be. He began his life as a figurehead being groomed and moulded to be something he didn't want to be. Living under the eye and hoof of someone who literally controlled every aspect of his life--- right down to the sunrise he saw from his bedroom window. It would be like living your entire life with the most smothering mother-figure in existence.

Sometimes love can smother you. and it doesn't feel like love, it feels like being used, like being controlled--- played with like a doll. That feeling, that you're not your own person, that you're everybody else's pet project, just gets worse and worse till you're willing to do the worst, most self-destructive things to yourself imaginable, just to do something that WASN'T arranged for you by your parents or your teachers or your guardians. Like an animal gnawing off its own leg to escape a trap. And once begun, that cycle of self-destruction gets harder and harder to break.... because the only ones that want to help you out of it are the very ones that you were trying to escape when you dove into it.

When Blueblood said he wanted to be like the compass rose on the map, when he said he wanted to be lost, it was because he wanted to be someplace where his life wasn't mapped out for him. And I don't think he was wanting to be the center of the whole world--- just to be the center of his own.

In every child's life there comes a time when he has to leave his parent's arms, strike out on his own, and live his own life. But Blueblood can't do that. How do you get away from a mother figure who rules a whole kingdom, and raises the moon and sun?

(...cont'd)

Part of growing up is letting go. The only way Ceelstia can help him is by cutting him loose... letting him "wander lost" until he finds his center, and can find his way back. He may not make it back, but at least he'll have had the chance to try.

Not all who wander are lost. My prescription for Blueblood: a ship. a crew. and a map with no lines. Tell him to sail off the edge of the last map they have, and start filling it in.

77748 Nice dissection. I agree with you!

#23 · Dec 23rd, 2011 · · · Three ·

77734

Well said, Sir; Well said.

That's really the end? this is the second story I've come across that had an ending similar to this one.

Please tell me this is not the conclusion of the story.

Very good work, if one that could use some editing. Celestia's characterization comes across as an excellent midpoint between pony and goddess, old and knowledgeable without being omniscient or callous. You've kept her smart, powerful, gracious, and in charge while still being shockable, and as a whole it works fairly well. Her emotions come a little too fast toward the end, and the finale scene a bit rushed as a result -- even after losing her temper, I'd still see Celestia as needing more prodding to break into sobs, between Discord and Nightmare Moon -- but it's still a very touching scene. In turn, you've made Prince Blueblood into the right level of prick: I know there's a lot of temptation to turn his sort of character into either abused woobies or cackling villains, and you've hit just the correct level of douche to keep him from being either completely unsympathetic or removing any of his blame for his actions. The wordplay is excellent, whether the subtle choices of phrase or the more overt repeated words, and character tone is distinct and nuanced. Very strong writing as a result.

On the editing side... there are a number of issues of varying severity. One oft-repeated issue : the correct format for quoting a speaking pony using a said word includes a comma, not a period. To take some examples from chapter two, the proper form would be “You see, I don’t do anything,” said the Prince with a sigh." ((This rule only applies to verbs that could replace "said", if it's an action verb it must have its own full sentence.)) Some typos are more severe : "It’s my revenge, you see. I’ve it hadn’t cursed me when I walked though it..." doesn't make sense, and I assume that the correct form would be "It’s my revenge, you see. If it hadn’t cursed me when I walked though it...". "The exercise must have been doing him goon." is, if accurate, a bit more humorous than the expected "The exercise must have been doing him good." If you'd like a full edit of the work, I can try to provide that. Alternatively, I've found that reading a work out loud can be, while slightly embarrassing, a good way to catch typos.

These aren't terrible, but they are distracting and sometimes confusing, and more significantly, pretty quick to fix.

Thematically, I'm not sure that bringing in the Elements of Harmony to fire the friendship laser is a good idea. It's not out of Celestia's characterization, since we know she considers them a good fallback option when nothing else works, but the setting doesn't really support their use like this, and for good reason. One of the nice parts about Luna Eclipsed is that it demonstrates Luna is the most metal Princess ever, and that she's very much like Nightmare Moon without the Evil. If she *had* come in drastically different, then the Elements would have been a magical brainwashing weapon, and that's not exactly a good thing for Friendship to do. The Elements don't need to free Blueblood from some sort of Evil influence because he's not really Evil, just a tremendous douche. And they can't exactly free Blueblood from being a tremendous Douche, because there'd not be much left.

Celestia might try them anyway -- she doesn't everything about the Elements or about any pony, and you've set her up as a fallible character -- but tragedy tends to be more bittersweet when there's the potential for a solution, especially one that could be taken were it not for the limits and flaws of the characters. Leaving the story on that note works, and works strongly in its own way, but is perhaps a bit more fatalistic than you might have been aiming for.

I love rebellion! That's why one of my favorite songs is 'Raise A Little Hell'. but unfortunately, blueblood's rebelling was destroying his life and he didn't care.
Sad, i would have liked to see how this all turns out.

The tragic part of this story is that, even in the most positive fairytale retelling, even if he donates the entirety of the House of Unicorn to charity and spends his days bringing happiness to orphaned foals, he's not going to live happily ever after.

Livers can regenerate, to an extent. I've seen mutton livers at work, ravaged by eczema, growing back. But kidneys? Once they're gone, that's it. And lung cancer... eeek.

The only way I can see for Celestia to 'rescue' Blueblood is to cut him loose completely, with no assets, and plonk him down in a small town somewhere to make his own way in life, without living off his ancestral funds. Sink or swim.

o.o I reckon I'm a softie in this sort of thing. An idealist. I always like to think that everybody is capable of .... redemption. Of cleaning up. Even if I haven't seen a great track record of it among people I've known -_-;

When we finally see Blueblood I was hopping he would be more...dignified.

But that is not where you are going, so lets see where you take me author!

Wow. Just...wow. That's all I can really say.

Have you ever considered submitting this story to Equestria Daily? You can find out how to do so here.

Jesus Christ.

That's... all I really have to say, honestly.

JBL

Rereading this story, I can conclude that it has only gotten better with age.

Omg please help Bluesy!

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