• Member Since 25th Jul, 2011
  • offline last seen Oct 11th, 2023

BrianBlessedPony


E

What was originally meant to be a single piece, this story, its prequels and sequels, focus on the mane six and their dealing with being the Elements of Harmony, how ever long that will last...

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 50 )

That was amazing.
Please brony, write more.

my heart exploded, twice.

996
Thank you! I do plan too, don't worry. But I got a lot of stories to do first!

This was a wonderful and extremely touching exploration of the concept of immortality. You manage to conjure up very emotional scenes even in very short flashbacks.

You also made me all snuffly. Now why'd you have to go and do that? Everybody's looking at me funny.. :fluttershysad:

This story is being continued? Awesome.

35546 To a degree. I wanted to get this chapter done for certain. If there will be more, I honestly don't know. But thank you!

/manlytears.jpg

That is all.

~ Magical Trevor, Minstrel of Equestria

Wanderer D
Moderator

Well done, very well done! So glad you finally wrote this!

36870 Heh, thank you. :twilightblush: Sadly not the best I could do I feel, after looking back on the 1st chapter. Such is life. Now to move on to more cheerful projects! With luck :derpyderp1:

Poor Spike, but that was a very heroic scene. Darn tears :fluttercry:

Heh, as sad as this was, my brain won't let me let it go, you called Spike Spoke at one point near the end. Simple typo, but I figured it was worth mention.

Your stories that I've read have a particular grammar issue that I've found very distracting. You seem to consistently reverse plurals and possessives.

You're going to review your story's grammar so that future stories work better. The princess's castle now houses two princesses. Now that they're reunited, they have resumed their weekly spa visits. At the princesses' last visit, the spa's water heater broke, so it gave them passes for their choice of any of the spas nearby. It's going to be rainy today, so their robot butler brought its umbrella.

And so on in that fashion. Seeing the plural possessive of "princess" rendered as "princess;" is not very good for immersion.

39155 Thank you, but sadly, I must admit it was inspired by the death of Porthos in The Man in the Iron mask. In my opinion, if a death must happen to main cast member, it must have purpous and be meaningful.

63747 Thanks, I thought I had caught that. Ah well, bugger!

64201 Heh, I wouldn't say that its that good :twilightblush: But thank you anyway.

65398 Well, I thank you for your honesty and your comments. I have never claimed to be a good writer, but I do try as much as I can to improve. Please understand that I rely heavily on Word to figure this out, and then my fellow Bronies who pre-read the stories for me on my behalf. So if they don't spot it, there is a damn good chance I wont either. I write these stories twice in effect these days, once on paper at work, then I type up. Sadly, I am not perfect. I'm usually a one man band dealing with two orchestra's and a vinyl. But I will try to remember what you've said when I next write. Thank you again.

65430 You're welcome, but it's "orchestras" there. Pluralizing with apostrophes seems to have become popular on the Internet for some reason. I wouldn't have commented on it except for the unusual frequency because I see it in a lot of other stories. Also, it's not the sort of thing that Word reliably catches because it doesn't involve misspelling, and it looks similar to what can be legitimate constructions. If you want to fix the problem, you'll just have to get the grammar down reliably as you write it.

66019 Well, typing before you go to bed after being up since 5am never makes much sense.

somebody read my fic if you do :yay: it's called Friends Never Say Goodbye

Oh my... this story actually made me shed a tear :fluttershysad: wonderfully written and it was an "extremely touching exploration of the concept of immortality." as the one above me said. I really don't have anything else to say, any criticism I could have had was overruled by the impact the story had. Although I do feel a bit... out of date commenting right now, since the last comment was almost 17 weeks ago. :twilightblush:

109797
Thank you! And don't worry about the delay, better late then never as they say!

A truly touching story and hopefully a wake-up slap in the face to all those, who consider the concept of immortality desirable. Forced to watch your loved ones wither away until your a weather-worn rock on a barren field, damned to stay for all eternity. Everyone should have the right to die. Anyways, well done indeed.

this is why I would turn down immortality

So I heard this story was good and stopped by to check it out. It looks promising, but it says incomplete and we haven't had an update since last November. I'm slightly concerned.

474843 Thank you, and sorry for the late reply!
695130 Exactly.
696780 Well, technically there was an update in February as part of The Sweetie Chronicles! But I am working on it, just, not good at writing at the moment

Look at the last line that comes from Rarity.



...Who is this "Spoke" fellow, and how does Rarity know him?

I came to this story on a recommendation, but unfortunately, I just couldn't enjoy reading it. The concept was sound, and the progression of the story was pretty good, but this story was terribly lacking in technical aspects. Truly, it looks like this story was never edited at all. There are mixed-up homophones, unnecessary and misplaced apostrophes, confusing pronoun usages, and generally muddled phrasings. Normally, I read right past most errors, but I found them to be frequent enough to really distract me. Obviously, this story was written a very long time ago, but I think that it could really use revisions of this type. You had the right premise to really make for a memorable story, but the errors stuck out like a sore thumb and kind of ruined it for me.

i.imgur.com/cGEpL.gif

Amazing; though the story could use a good editing.

Came here from Sweetie Chronicles.

Did not dissappoint.

Didn't even know this was on Fimfiction. I don't think the EqD post ever linked to it.

And I see that this version has both stories as one post and an "incomplete" tag. Does that mean we can expect more in the future?

I refuse to read past this chapter. This is the true story.

698577

When are you updating? And is the Sweetie Belle Chronicles: Fragments, canon? And is it before or after chapter 2 if it is?

“Sorry Dash, but it needed to be about, 20% cooler?”
This shit seriously needs to stop.

Finally got around to reading this in prep of Sweetie Belle Chronicles, and I have to say I'm sorry I didn't read it sooner.
This was a really good story, and I love Spike's final adventure. It seems fitting.

695130 yup that immortality isn't a gift but a curse. That living forever carries great weight

5147643 I had forgotten this story existed

Anyone else come here because of The Sweetie Chronicles?

3273637 You're right. This meme needs to be about 20% cooler.

I don't mean to be mean, but is this ever going to update?

‘The Most Glorious Death Is In Your Bed, Surrounded By Loved Ones. Don’t Quote Me On That.’
*To late.

This made me sad. That I mean the story made me sad. Also the fact that it only has 2 chapters as well.

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