I cautiously approached the house that was in front of me. It seemed strangely familiar and I had no idea why. I started walking towards it, holding my minigun in front of me. I quickly did a few double takes to make sure that nothing was sneaking up on me, but that did nothing to calm me.
I had been walking around the changeling camp, and looking for a way out. At this period in time I had no idea where the fuck I was, and for some reason my Pip-Boy, was not working. Every time I brought it up to look at the map there was a weird sort of slanted face, and the words 'U Mad Bro?' I was getting frustrated, just wandering around the base looking for a way to leave. I had lost my flare gun in the 'scuffle' and I no longer had a way of creating an exit. That is when I saw this house. This strange looking house.
The strangest aspect of it, was that it was a tree. An honest to god tree, and it had windows and doors. What? Stop giving me that look, I am not making any of this shit up. I approached the house, and looking at my compass, I realized that there was nothing inside of the house. I set the minigun down for a moment and I opened the door to find myself face to face with a fuckton of books. When I say a fuckton, I really mean a fuckton. Actually, a fuckton would be an understatement, if you were to multiply a fuckton times 3, then you would have a more accurate estimate of how many books there were in this library. I was completely stunned, and I simply stared at the books.
After about five minutes of exploring the library, I heard something upstairs. I caught my breath, and hefted the shotgun that I had 'liberated' from the changeling. I approached the stairs and took a few up when I heard my possible assailant sneeze. I froze for a second, and then continued my approach of the doors at the top. Glancing at my compass, I realized that there was something in the room, and it wasn't hostile. I had never known how my Pip-Boy, always knew when things were hostile or not, but I wasn't going to look a gift pony in the mouth. I tried my luck on the doorknob, and was greeted with a clacking coming from the other side of the door.
Whoever it was had locked the door, in fear of me. Well they were right to do so, but I was getting tired of picking locks, so I banged the door a couple times so the person on the other side would (hopefully) back away. After a few seconds, I aimed the shotgun at the door handle, and blew it out of existence. I gently pushed the door open with the barrel of my impromptu lockpick. I glanced around and saw nothing in the room. I saw another door, and as I approached I heard that one lock as well. I frowned, and proceeded to bash the door down with my power fist. It revealed a semi-clean bathroom, with some sort of weird lizard cowering in fear. It was probably about two feet tall, and looked like it would have shit its self if I had done anything more than knock the door down. I quickly crouched down, and held out my hand, as if I was speaking to an animal.
"Hey there, it's alright. I'm not going to hurt you." I said in a gentle voice. The reptile came out of its fetal position, and slowly reached its hand out towards mine. It was then that a changeling decided to make a surprise entrance through the window. As soon as I heard the smashing sound, and I spun around instantly with my power fist ready to take down whatever it was. The changeling looked disoriented, and it was a LOT bigger than the others. About 5 times bigger maybe? Yea that was about right. I stared at the freakishly large changeling and took a moment to contemplate how the hell it was even fitting in here. I looked up at the ceiling and realized that it was cracking through the wood, and creating large gouges in the ceiling.
I looked down in time for a large hoof smacking me across the room, and out through the wall. I tumbled and rolled a good distance. I got up and was rewarded with pain across my chest when I breathed. Broken ribs. I looked down to inspect the damage, and saw my chest plate was totally destroyed, with most of the metal caving in onto my skin. I tried to remove it, and the pain that greeted me was worse than before. Knowing that things were going to get worse before they would get better, I grabbed the thing, braced myself, and tore it off, taking with it a large amount of flesh and skin.
I screamed. Normally high pain tolerance would let me ignore it, but as I was not in immanent danger, I took my own sweet time. I quickly administered a stimpack to my...chest area, and I felt the pain get worse, as the torn flesh tried to knit itself together. I used two more, and the process sped up and after about thirty more seconds of pain, it was over. I breathed a sigh of relief, and got up. I directed my attention to the tree house, and saw it getting torn to shreds as the freak changeling tried to get out. I shed the rest of my armor, and quickly changed into my Chinese stealth suit. I wasn't trying to sneak, but it was all the protection I had at the moment. I looked to the front door of the house, and saw my minigun still sitting there. Normally these situations would be solved pretty quickly with a mini nuke or two, but that lizard thing was still alive, and I wasn't intent on killing it.
I sprinted towards my gun, and afterwards I was rewarded with its reassuring weight. I hefted it up, aimed at the monstrosity tearing the house to shreds, and fired away. The thing roared in pain the the sheer number of 5mm rounds struck their target. Chunks of flesh were torn away, green blood was leaked everywhere, but the beast wasn't dying. I held my position as I kept firing, only taking pauses to reload.
I saw the lizard trying to sneak away from behind the thing, when it looked at me. I gave a nod, and a little 'shoo' motion with my hands, and the lizard dropped down from the remains of the second floor and sprinted away. Now that the pest was gone, I could go nuclear. I dropped the minigun and sprinted away, trying to reach a safe distance. Once I did, I slung the thing over my shoulder and hefted the large weapon up. I took a moment to glance at the creature, which was still trying to break free of the house, and I fired. The small football sized weapon struck the floor of the building, and it went up in a ball of radioactive fire. I reloaded, and fired again. There was no way that I was going to let that thing have even the smallest chance to live. I put the weapon over my shoulder, and I brought up my shotgun as I approached the now smoking ruin of a house.
As the smoke cleared, I saw the black thing trying to get up, after a large chunk of ceiling had landed on it.
"Don't you ever fucking die?" I asked the thing as I approached it. Its head whipped in my direction, and gave a snarl.
"Well, nice to know you." I said as I leveled the gun at its face. I pulled the trigger, pumped it, and fired again. The two rounds tore off most of his face, and he was still moving.
"Goddammit." I said to myself again as I clambered up on top of the still alive beast. I put the barrel of the shotgun at the base of its neck, and fired several times until I could see bone. Once again the beast still refused to die, but I could sense the end of its life was near.
"Just. Fucking. DIE!" I yelled as I kept firing into the creatures spine. It eventually broke, and the thing fell silent and I kept firing until I ran out of ammo. I wanted to make sure that the thing was dead, dead, and more dead. I heard the shotgun click, and I found I had no more shells. I threw the gun at the remains of its face, and jumped down. I walked away from the trees remains, and walked in the direction that I saw the lizard go. I didn't have to go far before I saw the purple and green reptile cowering behind a bush.
"Hey, c'mon let's get out of here." I said, as I did a 'follow me' gesture with my hands. The thing just sat there looking at me, fear holding him in place.
"Okay, fine looks like we gotta do this the hard way." I walked over, and pick up the thing and it put up quite a fuss. It kept scratching me, and breathing green fire that flowed over my armor. I, in no mood for the reptiles antics, brought up my mask, and glared at him. He instantly stopped moving, and looked at my face.
"Stop putting up a fight, and this will be much easier." I said to him in my condescending voice.
"Well fine, don't talk to me, but stop putting up such a fight." I said as I kept walking. I brought my Pip-Boy up again, and all of the tabs were filled with the same message. The radio one still worked, but I was only picking up one frequency. It was playing this song. I honestly had no idea what was going on, and I shrugged it off and kept walking. It was then that I heard a sort of maniacal laughing. It could be described as, and evil laugh, that was laced with insanity, but wasn't doing a very good job at inspiring fear. I looked around for the source of the laughing, when I heard someone starting to talk.
The odd thing was, it was like the voice was in my head.
Why, hello there John. said the mysterious voice inside my head.
"Where are you?" I asked cautiously, slowly scanning all the landscape around me.
Why, I am in your head. It is quite roomy in here, and I rather like it.
"How are you in my head?" The lizard was now giving me odd looks.
Well, I am trapped in Canterlot at the moment, but my magic is allowing me to communicate with you.
"Are you the one fucking with my Pip-Boy?" I asked him. The lizard was now trying to squirm out of my grip, with a panicked look on its face.
My, my, my! Such language. Well if you must know, then yes. I was the one messing with that device on your wrist.
"Why?" All this conversation had been was me asking questions to him.
Why? For the sake of Chaos. You can't find a way out, and as a result, you are causing Chaos all over that base. I rather enjoy it.
I was really perplexed at that moment, and I was trying to get a grasp on this.
"So, you're telling me that you are intentionally keeping me here for your entertainment?"
Well...yes. But I have a very good reas-
"Buddy, no one fucks with me. If you don't help me find a way out right now, I will hunt you down and kill you."
Well, that isn't going to happen. I am rather fond of living, and there is no way you could find a way out my yourself.
"Wanna bet on that?" I asked him as I walked into a nearby house.
Yes. I bet you 10 bits that you cannot get out without my help.
"Okay then. You're on." I said as I pried open a light socket. I reached in, and gently severed a few specific wires, and pressed them onto my Pip-Boy. My arm jolted as the electricity traveled from my Pip-Boy to my arm. The screen went haywire then went blank. Suddenly it booted up, and it was good as new.
Wait! That's cheating! He said.
"No, you never laid down any ground rules. Now I am going to find you."