Well, I never even realized I typed 1000 words. Not bad for a first go.

EDIT 10/22/12: NNNnope! The new and improved chapter 1 is now 2000 words!

Can I suggest a couple of games for Luna? UMVC3 and Blazblue Continuum Shift:Extended.

Ghost Recon Future Soldier is a good game

Tracking. This got me interested!

good start. maybe a little short but its a good start none the less.

>>830799830799 Sure I'll take any request I deem worthy of Luna's attention, but I wanna get the games that I own down first as I'm more familiar with them.

>>830811830811 I'll have to watch the playthroughs to get a good idea of how to write up a chapter about it.

Do Star Fox 64! Its a classic 8D

1 sec

.....

Image: http://i.imgur.com/JdpYT.gif

Skyrim.

Skyrim and Dawnguard.  I could easily imagine her screaming at tge TV while playing that game.

WE SHALL SLAY THEE, THY MIGHTY DRAGON!

Before Luna was all normal... but after the gaming hits her she'll be all like,

"HACK THE PLANET! HACK THE PLANET!"

All right, 2000 words! Doubling the fun!

>>831134831134 Hmmm, mind if I steal your little quote?

Is this going to be a series where luna plays the old and new games? (Meaning lots of chapters) If you are; me loves you forever!

>>831598831598 Awww what gave away the idea?

>>831619831619

loved this chapter

And it begins......I cannot wait to see what insanity will come from all of this!

Just as a suggestion, any chance of seeing Luna playing a DragonBall Z game...I don't know why, but seeing Luna play one of those games is hilarious.

>>831683831683 Oh yes, any game will happen, I just need to get the right feel of the video game and watch a lot of playthroughs of said game.

Ace Combat 5 or Command and Conquer (the older ones)....that's all I got!

One question for y'all. Since I'm going to be doing a couple chapters on the Reach campaign levels, the amount of words it will take to describe them all with be a lot, would you like me to make each one a part like "Part 1" and "Part 2"? Or should I go ahead and type all my chapters in Google Docs and upload them from there? To be honest I've never tried Google Docs so can somebody explain to me how it works?

You're beginning to tell us about the game sir. We need more Luna, it's about her. If you wanted to write a story about Halo with Ponies you should write that, but write more about Luna's interaction with gaming in general. Does she turn into a recluse? A social gamer?

I was about to do this myself... Oh well~ This is better then what I could have done anyway~!

>>833022833022 Ah but these are but the cutscenes, where Luna has barely any control over, as soon as I get to the "gameplay" you'll start to smile...maybe.

I'm going to be honest, we don't need you to describe the cutscenes to us, the likelyhood is that we already know what happens in them, alot of us are gamers after all.

So, perhaps it would be more benifitial to note that these cutscenes exits, but not desribe then in too much detail, the same goes for the enevitable combat, as we probably didnt come here for a complete decription of the game. Maybe do her thoughts up untill she reaches the end pf the level or at least some point in it. Then it might be the right time for some time skips. I think it goes without saying that we want her to play more than just halo, and in doing so perhaps you could introduce here to the live feature where she might do some Mane 6 interaction.

>>834957834957 Sigh I know that part already, I did some of that in the second chapter and the third one is just a sneak peek.

Your story has been featured!

make her play dead rising

*GASP!*

This is hype as sh*t!

Its funny, but you need some editors! There are a lot of typos, try to get someone who has English as their primary language to proof read your stuff to avoid mistakes.

Great idea and fun to read though, more please :)

by any chance did u read my story?

Hey! Cool story! Just one thing I picked up on. your sentence:

"There is doorway to a balcony that opens up to a private section of the royal gardens where both of the royal princesses could soar above without attracting enough attention Luna is allowed in her sister's room and she could do anything she wanted in Celestia's room"     needs a punctuation mark in it. I would suggest:

"There is doorway to a balcony that opens up to a private section of the royal gardens where both of the royal princesses could soar above without attracting enough attention. Luna is allowed in her sister's room and she could do anything she wanted in Celestia's room"

Still loving the story, bro!

>>836044836044 Harmless shinanagins and My Little Magicka

>>836044836044 Harmless shinanagins and My Little Magicka

>>836099836099 and thanks, I never noticed that

>>836032836032 I could ask my teacher, she always edits the class's essays.

>>835987835987 Wait what?

>>836141836141 nice and gratz on the featured.

>>836155836155 As in featured box? Or popular stories?

>>836163836163 both. Welcome to ze big leagues. Pun unintended with mah name

Great story idea, however, try not to mix past and present tense, e.g. "Luna smiled and moves her character forward." Looking forward to more!

>>836312836312 Editors, I might need editors.

>>836150836150 You were featured Plain and simple!

pretty good, i give you props for such a nice blend of halo and mlp, but might have wanted to change the characters names to something more pony-ish.

So Luna's gonna be able to talk to the characters?

Image: http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1aquipEg91r2ekwko8_250.gif

For some reason I also keep finding myself thinking that Luna's somehow gonna get put into the game, but that would be a bit clichéd... right? RIGHT?!

The origins of Gamer Luna.

Pick story that sounds good.

Next day, its feautured. Crazy right? Well at least I know that I may a good choice.

Does anypony else see a notice up there by MicTheMicrophone? Cause I'm getting disturbed by it.

"The banana and grape farms are being devoured by those troublesome sprites as we speak." That's Celestia for ya. Dont forget about the mmmm bananas.

I dont see anything but what is it? Anyway, good so far. Are you gonna do a chapter for every mission cause that will get boring for us and you. Or are you gonna skip to the mission, "Lone Wolf" with Luna saying, "That was bull!"

>>838747838747 Probably

>>838747838747 I've been thinking alot of how to deal with this all night.

MORE STUFF TO READ THAT WILL ENSURE I NEVER CATCH UP TO ALL THE STORIES?

HKAJGDGWUKRTAGYUAFISIQAGFAHIAPQF

One word describes this story: aweshum.

It's like awesome, but slightly more meaningful, because the story is so aweshum it prevents the reader from spelling awesome correctly.

I really want to see her play Animal Crossing.

...

SHUTUPIT'STHEGREATESTGAMEINEXISTENCEOKAY

>>840626840626 I'll try to cover as many games as I can in my lifetime.

>>840639840639

Don't force yourself to do it if you don't want to.

Halo: Reach? HELL YEAH!

hope Luna stops tghe game to eat something

Celestia paused for a moment as she gazes towards the end of the hall as she thinks of what could possibly occupy her sister for the next few hours so she wouldn't be distracted.

This is a miniature run-on sentence. The last part probably should have split off into its own sentence.

"Its alright my dear Pinkie Pie, I don't normally celebrate my birthday as I've spent many lifetimes celebrating my birth. Thank you though."

Missing an apostrophe.

"O-oh, well excuse our - I mean, excuse myself. I still have trouble adjusting to this modern day's grammatical system."

Silly Luna. (I know that you wrote it like that on purpose, but still.) Silly, silly Luna. That "myself" should be a "me".

I must have to dealt with soon or the ponies of Fillydelphia will lose a part of their important produce.

I don't...

I don't even...

... I don't even how even that sentence ever worked if even it did at all ever!

Wat.

>>840749840749 Well dang, you've caught me at my rush typing times. I was publishing that at midnight.

>>840749840749 There "mom". I've fixed it.

At some point, do one(or more) of the Fallout series. I will love you forever if you do.

>>830799830799

NOOOO Not UMVC3. That game is so broken and such an OTG fest that it's disgusting.

BlazBlue on the other hand yes.

Ooh, Maybe Guilty Gear, Melty Blood or Capcom vs SNK.

Marvel vs Capcom 2 though would be better!

Sorry, bit of a fighting game nerd :P

>>840782840782

Umm

I'm not sure if I should be pleased or offended, but I'm leaning toward pleased, and that fact itself offends me.

Your "mother" here.

"Theres too much green of these devices. They should of been the color blue instead."

This lacks apostrophe. Also, that "should of" should be a "should have" and apparently "should've" isn't a word so don't even try that.

"The Office of Naval Intelligence believes deployment of a Spartan team is a gross misallocation of valuable resources. I disagree,", said the uniformed pony.

There's an extra comma after the quote.

"Commander", said the mare.

Unfinished sentences that use a comma at the end have the comma go before the ending quotation mark.

The white stallion and a huge lumbering horse of a stallion turn to look at Luna .

There's an extra space before the period.

"Oooo, such foal language in this game."

I'm going to assume you did this on purpose as angry children tend to curse in gallons.

"I'm not gonna lie to you, Lieutenant", Cloudrain said to Luna.

The same thing as I said earlier: Comma goes before ending quotation mark instead of after. For that matter, a comma is actually never supposed to go directly after a quotation mark.

"Got it, sir", said Luna's Noble Six.

You probably understand the point by now. The one with the commas and the quotation marks.

That said, what is "Halo"?

>>840914840914 Okay "mother". You're helping a lot here. but uh could you private message me this?

I like the premise, but am I the only one that finds it very awkwardly worded in places? There are sentences in it that are redundant or repetitive, and one whole paragraph switched to present tense from past tense.

>>840954840954 Hey it's a hard habit to get rid of. I'm trying my best here.

OK, straight up, you gotta deal with the tense changes.  Your story has to be in past tense or present tense, not both.

I don't know if this is a glitch or not, but I just got my sixth notification of an update today, and yet there hasn't been an update...My guess is that you're working on a new chapter. Please, write it in Word/Gdocs/*insert word processor of your choice* first and then transfer it over to FIM. That way we don't get spammed with "update" messages, only to have our hopes mercilessly crushed.

Thoughts on the chapter:

Holy crap tense change!

Celestia's internal monologue reads awkward to me.

Pinkie's entrance is a bit of a dues ex machina, and the reasoning behind it is weak.

Nice Idea but the execution could be way better. Go back to the writing desk, and get yourself a per-reader/editor.

>>841591841591 Most likely a glitch because I didn't get any notifications

>>841748841748 Yeah, I'm starting to lean that way too (grand total is now ten messages). Reason I made that guess was because that's what happened with two other stories that I was watching. They switched over to Gdocs and it hasn't happened again.

That was fabulous what seems to be the start of a great story can't wait to read all the new chapters but jolly good show

>>841758841758 same for me, I got 6 messages for this story and two for another. FimFic. has been screwy all day for me though, something about "Bad Gateways".

>>841853841853 Yeah, Knighty needs to find out why these are happening and needs to fix 'em. From time to time I get those Error 502's and 504's as well (today was particularly bad). Probably something to do with the site's coding.

love it

>>837315837315 Idk, isn't that kinda obvious? Don't worry I won't do that much. Just a little experimentation.

Ah! Kat, and Cat! I'm so confused!

Not really. Digging the story. Just watch your grammar, bro.

A few mistakes, but not enough to really detract from the story. Liking it so far, and I would love to see Luna's reaction to something like Nazi Zombies.

I do have to ask, are these ponies anthropomorphic?

PS: Why on God's green Reach, is the grunt birthday skull not on? That's a requirement! I love hearing the children cheer whenever I give a grunt a .45 caliber lobotomy!

PPS: When Luna achieves an achievement, will the "bloop-blip" noise and the name of the achievment appear?

PPPS: If you ever do Nazi Zombies, do on the map "Five", it's my favorite map

PPPPS: Post scripts are fun

Do Amnesia!

your first story and not one dislike and 86 likes and i didn't get crap for my story maaaannnn  i'm diffidently going to follow any and all of you advise

I now love this story, and for some reason upset that there hasn't been a game where NPCs will actually carry a conversation with you. I now can recall EVERY moment I would've lived if I could have told Kat to distract the Wraith for ten seconds.

Woah, more tense-changes!

"A small rectangular box suddenly flew from the direction of a vase in the hall in front of her. It flies towards her face and Celestia with her great reflexes catches it with her hooves. She looks at the vase and sees a familar pink mare emerging from the vessel. As she got a better look, she recognizes the pony as the Element of Laughter."

Good start to a story with potential, shame about the writing flaws though.

"In all of my silent life, I've never seen anypony despatch two Elites in 10 seconds," Cloudrain said.

"Too bad it's easy mode," Smile laughed.

Did the Princess of the Night just get pwoned by an A.I.?

I do agree with the fact that you are describing the game and not focusing on Luna a lot, but guys the story is still in the second chapter. Nothing serious has happened yet. I wonder what will happen when Noble Team goes into space...

ooooohh get her a computer and make her play runescape  http://runescape.com/game.ws

>>840639840639

While Halo is my favorite series of all time, I'd love to see Luna's rection to the very foal language, disease and melted ponies in Crysis 2/Crybro 2!

amazing

>>841853841853 I only WISH I got 6 messages for ANY updates...

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Luna_apple.png

I havn't had an email update sent to my email since May 28,

and emails to Knighty have never even been responded to!

It's AGGRAVATING!!!

Seriously??? If anypony has an clue as to what might be going on with my lack of email story update notifications, I'd love some insight, as I can't seem to get ANY TECH SUPPORT from this website's staff! I could fire off another message to the staff... But I never seem to get a reply... EVER...

>>842690842690 Ok Answer to your first question: They are not anthro.

Answer to your PPS: Sure, when I feel it's necessary.

Answer to your PPPPS: Yes they are.

If only the real halo reach was like this

>>831096831096

this

She must play Ikaruga! She will go NUTS!

Have Luna Play-

Mainstream Titles

Dead Space 2

Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3

Katamari Damacy

Alan Wake

Modern Warfare 3

Left 4 Dead 2

Downloadable Titles

Deathsmiles

Techno Kitten Adventure

Bastion

Minecraft: XBox/ XBuck 360 Edition

Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

Sins Of The Flesh (Indie)

Fatal Attraction (Indie)

>>880116880116 I have

Dead Space planned

UMVC 3 planned

MoD Warfare 3 (and possibly prequels) planned

Left 4 Dead 1 & 2 planned

Minecraft planned

The Elder Scrolls (doing skyrim first) planned

Gears of War planned

Dead Island planned

Black Ops (maybe 2? maybe I'll do 1 first) planned

Final Fantasy planned

Super Mario Bros planned

Smash Bros Brawl (and all that goodness) planned

and soooo much more.

all those multiplayer stuff planned

and I'll take any offers planned (if i have the time)

*hyperventilating*

....

yeeeeeaaaaaaa

Minecraft. NAU.

Dude the Mass Effect series

Luna + video games, why does this seem natural?

Ponystation3 beats xbucks 360 elite into oblivion no contest.

Preeeeeeeeettty good just my brain is picking up a lot of "She" in this chapter.

If you ever need to keep her busy for even longer, get her Minecraft. XD

Grammar has no "e's".  Sorry.  Still a good story!