The world is a complicated place. We all have odd jobs and titles. I happen to have more than most. any ways. This is the record of my life in modern Equestria. Take of it what you will. -Wind. Minor deity
inspired by many conversations with damaged and co. on their discord channel.
I take full blame if this ends up terrible
Needs to be a space and capital at the enchant part, but otherwise cool!
7671518 thanks
I'm intrigued to see where this goes.
Aegis
shakeshis headshook
Liked it. Awaiting more
might be filler in the new chapter.
I'm enjoying this. Don't worry about the occasional filler, just tell the story the way you want
If Wind was voiced, what would he sound like?
7881545 errrr. like me? I honestly don't know what I sound like sooo... use the powers of imagination. it's how I voice most of my characters. he keeps a light tone in conversation and his voice is not high pitched by any means. sorry but that is all the info I can give you
7881545 why?
7881614 I narrate the voices of the characters in my head when I read stories. By the way, when you say "modern Equestria", do you mean the Equestria from the show or an Equestria that's closer to real life, technologically speaking?
7964489 from the show
'Little' Wind
i have no regrets?
pU sbmuhT
8028484 thankee
First 'they" needs to be capitalized.
Well, glancing through this, your style isn't exactly wrong on anything, and I actually like the in the moment, stream of consciousness narrative. The problem is description. It isn't there. Description can setup the entire scene and draw readers into the story, even give context, but you don't have it here.
Other than that, not a bad first chapter.
8149971 very very true
I lack any and all description because I failed as a writer
8149991 Bops Wind on the head
Don't say that. You're far from the worst writer I've seen, and I've had to critique someone my advanced fiction writing class who failed horribly on every front-grammar, language, plot, consistency, dialogue, narrative structure, and more. In an university class. Advanced fiction freaking writing.
So, yeah, there's problems with the story. That hardly means you've failed as a writer, so don't beat yourself up about it.
Is this a self-insert story?
this is gonna be the last chapter for a while. longer than my irregular once a month things
I really like this line. Feels profound and rather distinctive for the character.
Overall, I'm glad you came back to this. While I admit a little confusion on what's happening, I found the text joyful to read and pleasantly flowing, and the emotion here is rather clear and bears impact, too.
8563958
What are you confused about dear friend? I wanted to tell how a story continues even after you're gone. Aegis will visit sometime in the week and discover that his friend, who he thought immortal has passed away. Forest will continue to do the will of the council and try to turn the other Eternals back to aloofness, and if he can't he is ordered to end them so new gods can take their place. There's threads of story that will never be followed but they'll still happen.