• Member Since 2nd Mar, 2014
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Baal Bunny


Part of the AugieDog family of companies

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After the whole "casting mind control magic on her friends" incident, Starlight spends a sleepless night staring out her bedroom window and wondering how she can ever manage to apologize to them. And to the rest of Equestria for everything else she's managed to foul up over the years, too, now that she thinks about it...

My entry in the October 2016 Writeoff, "The Darkest Hour," this story came in 10th place.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 12 )

A nice little stream-of-conciousness piece with some great writing.
Good job!

This was a really great look at the inner working of poor Starlight's tormented conscience. Well done!

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Thanks, folks!

It kinda fits in with today's finale, too, which is always a plus.... :scootangel:

Mike

This was really good. And it got me thinking, at the part where she mentions her mistakes are worse than other ponies' mistakes.
"What if Starlight Glimmer tried removing her own cutie mark?"
and
"What if she succeeded?"

Food for thought :rainbowderp:

Thanks for making me think. :derpytongue2:

You're a mess, but you're working on it. You're a failure, but you're working on it. You're a monster, but you're working on it.

This be a good story, mate!

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Thanks, folks!

I seem to have developed something of a rapport for Starlight, though I don't believe I've ever tried to take over any villages... :twilightblush:

Mike

Wow. It's not often that I comment on stories, but this is definitely an exception. Starlight's stream of consciousness sounded genuine and plausible. I feel like you did an excellent job at tapping into her character. Aside from maybe one or two minor errors, this story is truly something special. Liked and favorited, and hoping to see more from you in the future. :ajsmug:

VERY well done! There are many "Starlight trying to atone for her actions" fic on here, but this is probably the best one I've read! You kept Starlight in character the whole way through, and I could actually see her having internal conflicts just like the ones you described here. Grammar was more or less perfect. If I HAD to nitpick, I'd say that using different fonts and such for each side of the argument might help to better understand who's saying what. But, again, this is just a nitpick.

You did a FANTASTIC job writing this fic. You should be proud of it. :twilightsmile:

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Thanks!

I've got another Starlight story called "Bowled Over" that you might enjoy as well! :twilightsmile:

Mike

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Awesome, I'll go check it out!

This is gorgeous. I love character studies and this one is a masterpiece. Here, have an upvote!

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