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BOBthieBomber 44742

Joined April 2012
45 followers

    BOBthieBomber's Stories (4)


    When Rarity discovers a gray hair in her mane she seeks out to obliterate it. She decide to go to Twilight to find a solution to her "aging problem". When Twilight use a special spell on her things get messed up big time

    What will happen. read it and find out.

    First Published
    28th Jun 2012
    Last Modified
    4th Sep 2012

    Comments ( 24 )

    #1 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    There's alot of gramatical errors and a few spelling errors, might want to look over the story again but otherwise great job, the idea is interesting.

    #2 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    It's a great idea for a story. Something i'd expect to see as an actual episode. However your grammar and spelling make this fic impossible to read.

    #3 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    May you please consider changing when Twilight says cannot constantly.It seems a tad more Rarity to say that if you were to ask me in my opinion.:twilightsmile:

    #4 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    interesting idea, but you really need a editer.

    #5 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    It's nice really nice but grammar dude give it a reread or get someone to because the grammar throws people off a bit.

    Other then that I like it

    #6 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    Shows promise so far, hope it gets better.

    #7 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    Seriously. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Why can't people on this site use question marks? THEY GO AT THE END OF QUESTIONS. :flutterrage:

    #8 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    im loving it so far

    #9 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    lol, fluttershy is going to have a freakin heart attack and everypony is going to freak out. probobly like this: the horror the horror! eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:fluttershbad:

    #10 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    >>822841 shit, sorry. i thought I had question marks on all the questions. i'm going to fix it later.

    #11 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 3d ago · · ·
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    Aside from the obvious grammar and stylistic mistakes, I thought that it didn't seem exactly credible that Rarity would automatically know that she had lost her talents in fashion upon realizing her cutie mark is gone--she had plenty of skill even as a filly (see The Cutie Mark Chronicles).  Although it might be more of a problem with a stylistic delivery than consistency with canon-- I would have been more dramatic for Rarity to actually try to remember what she knew in order to determine she really had forgotten anything.  

    Still, not exactly a bad premise for a story.

    #12 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 2d ago · · ·
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    >>823793

    I agree! And it'll be fun so see what Fluttershy thinks about Spikes new appearance. :yay::moustache:

    Needs more exclamation marks...

    Oh, and while I'm at it: Hi, there! :pinkiehappy:

    #13 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 2d ago · · ·
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    How the heck did Spike become older while Rarity became younger? :raritydespair: :moustache:

    #14 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 2d ago · · ·
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    >>824554 We meet again Mr WhatTheBrony (clap the back of my cat while wearing a eye patch.) and also hi there :pinkiehappy:

    #15 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 2d ago · · ·
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    >>825110 it will be explained in the next chapter.

    #16 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 2d ago · · ·
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    #17 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 2d ago · · ·
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    Good story:pinkiehappy: Keep it up!..but like everyone says get a editor

    #18 · Chapter 1 · 46w, 15h ago · · ·
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    Wow! Nice!:pinkiehappy::pinkiesmile::rainbowkiss: But I agree with the others, you need an editor.:unsuresweetie:

    #19 · Chapter 2 · 36w, 5d ago · · ·
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    So all the adults are now foals and vice versa. I'm concerned mostly about the Cake's babies. Did two infants just become adults too?

    #20 · Chapter 2 · 36w, 5d ago · · ·
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    OMG LOL:rainbowlaugh::derpytongue2:

    #21 · Chapter 2 · 36w, 5d ago · · ·
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    >>1217447 you could say that.

    #22 · Chapter 2 · 36w, 4d ago · · ·
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    #23 · Chapter 2 · 36w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Why do I get the feeling that everyone is going to angry at Twilight for being unaffected. Also I wonder if this would make Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon act more mature (but my guess is no)

    #24 · Chapter 2 · 36w, 3d ago · · ·
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    I have a feeling that this went a bit further than ponyville... :trollestia:

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