The Ponyville Colt Air Force (P-CAF)

by ShadowBrony21

Prologue- Mayday

14/8/3014, 1130 hours

Outskirts of Ponyville, Equestria

Day 6

Mayday

All is well in the small town of Ponyville. Ponies were in for another day of trotting, chatting, eating and shopping on the weekends, but for a small group of colts, the day couldn't get any bigger. In a small, wooden, make-shift cabin on the outskirts of town, seven colts were making the finishing touches to their first creation, a wooden biplane powered by a smoky combustion engine of unknown origin.

"Alright Lads!" A small orange colt with an army-green officer's cap slapped onto his head boomed out to his comrades. "We are due to take-off in 10 minutes!" He looked at the small watch on his hoof. "Button! How is everything going?!" He asked, referring to a brown colt who wore a small red and yellow cap with a bent twig of plastic on top.

The colt jumped out from under the wooden contraption, before scooting over to the orange colt with a clipboard in hand. His face was cover in black from the inner workings of the machine. "Um... Eh..." The colt stuttered as he fumbled and flipped through the clipboard, searching for the correct page.

The orange colt rolled his eyes at the lack of co-ordination of the group, especially the colt standing in front of him. He sighed, then coughed to interrupt Button Mash's searching spree, catching his attention. "What did I tell you about organisation Corporal?" He asked with the sternest voice the young colt could muster, standing up as straight as he could.

"Umm... Ah... Sorry Sergeant, it's just that all my papers are in this and they tend to like to mingle with one another." Button looked down at his clipboard again and continued searching.

"Argh..." The orange colt face-palmed, "Tell me Corporal, what is the point of the clipboard having a clip?" He asked, causing the colt the stutter even more.

"But then... it all looks like one pile... and everything's in there shuffled up.... You only gave me one clipboard." The brown colt replied.

"You could just sort out the pile, Button," The orange colt continued. "For instance, recent things at the front, older things at the back, specific categories in between, and if you really want to go that far, separate them with coloured paper. Otherwise, instead of shuffling papers, you'll be juggling clipboards. Which do you think is more efficient?"

"I can learn to juggle, Juggling's fun!" Button replied, oblivious to the colt's sarcasm. "Oh! here it is!" He said grabbing out the sheet of paper and reading it.

"Finally..." The orange colt muttered.

Button cleared his throat before skimming the report and then reading it out loud.

"All is ready for take-off, few minor issues were encountered, but shouldn't stand much of a problem." He flipped the page, revealing a list which he red off.

"Ropes and plates are slightly rusty, but Snips is currently brushing the rest off."

Behind him, a short, chubby unicorn was levitating a metal brush, taking off the rust on the wing supports of the bi-plane.

"Radio frequency issues are being sorted out."

To his left, Snails was tweaking the ground radio, attempting to connect it with the plane's own.

"The some of the controls are reversed and inconsistent, but Rumble's testing them out to get used to them.

On the pilot seat of the plane sat a grey colt with goggles on, who was pulling on the controls and turning around to see their effects on the tail and wings.

"The landing gears are slightly deflated, so Tender Taps is pumping them up and giving them tests."

Below the plane was an orange colt with a purple mane pumping air into the tires and poking them with his hoof, before going at it again.

"The winds are quite unpredictable today, so Featherweight is measuring wind speeds and direction."

Outside the cabin, a slender Pegasus colt was being blown around by the wind like a toy, before settling down on his hooves and blowing him around again.

"The turret and guns are being reloaded and should be done soon enough."

On the plane, Pipsqueak was filling the 'guns' with rubber bands.

"Mum said I should be home by seven, because the fries would get cold and..."

"Button." The orange colt cut him off. "Important issues," he said, putting an emphasis on 'important'.

"But Base, she said that I could bring you guys along." The brown colt whined.

The orange colt thought to himself. "Hmm... Kinda relevant, food and rations should always be listed down."

"I think you're taking this thing too seriously," Rumble said approaching the colts.

"Hey private! Aren't you meant to be testing the controls?!" First Base questioned.

"My point exactly," The grey colt muttered to Button. "Already done them, know them like the back of my hoof."

"How do you remember the back of your hoof?" Button asked, "I can't picture it completely without looking at it." Button looked down at his hoof which he extended in front of him.

"It's a saying," Rumble told him.

"Seems like a bad one to me."

"Guys!" First shouted to get the colt's attention. "Thanks to your disorganisation, rambling and sidetracking, we only have five minutes before take-off." He glared at them both, especially at Button. "And you forgot something in your report. Why is there paint on your face?"

"Oh, um... it's 'Oil'," Button corrected. "I took care of that just then."

Meanwhile, a small piece of tape fell from under the machine, followed by a spill of black liquid all over the floor.

First Base sighed and rolled his eyes, giving Button as many hints of his disappointment as much as he could without the use of sound. The brown colt was still completely oblivious.

He finally let out a cough, attracting Button's attention, and addressed Button.

"Button Mash. You have proven to me that you are incompetent, stupid, forgetful, inefficient, oblivious and extremely, extremely innocent And... clueless. You are almost useless besides the tools and equipment you provide us with, and I wouldn't give a second thought of not discharging you from service if not for that. Due to these reasons, I am hereby demoting you, Corporal Button Mash, to a Lance Corporal." He swiped off Button's rank slide and replaced it with another.

"Hey! I worked hard for that chevron!" Button cried out.

"Well, now you don't deserve it," First Base replied. "Besides, the first chevron you had was just given to you."

"Fine! I'll trade this chevron for the one I earned!" Button firmly stated.

"What's the difference?"

"The other rank slide's chevron is the one I earned, this one." He pointed at the slide in his hoof, "is the one a got for free. If you leave me with this chevron, I forget be reminded of the horrible mismatch of my unearned chevron."

"Unearned? is that even a word?" Rumble asked.

First Base grunted in frustration and yelled, "Shut up! Whatever, fine! Give me that slide, and I'll give you your stupid chevron; by shoving it right up your..."

"Sergeant! We are ready for take-off!" Snips interrupted.

"Radio is connected!" Snails added.

"Oh good!" First Base cried out in relief. "At least some ponies are productive, maybe Snips and Snail should be my new Corporals."

"But I thought I was a good Corporal!" Button cried out.

"You were." First Base replied.

"I think you are taking this rank thing too far Base," Rumble said, stepping into the conversation as Button sat on the ground and wept from the lost of his position.

"What?! Just because Button sits down and starts crying means we should call this whole thing off."

"It's just that it is really confusing and doesn't really make all too much sense," Rumble continued. "For instance, I'm a private, but on the plane, I'm the pilot and captain. So I can command you in flight, but you can command me in ground."

"So what? That seems fine."

Rumble sighed and continued. "Another example is Featherweight. He is a Corporal, but he is not in charge of anypony as all of us are under Button." Rumble pointed outside at Featherweight flipping around, being tossed by the wind before putting him down and starting again.

"In the regular military, each Corporal controls five to ten ponies. Button is only in charge of four."

"It's always: The military does this. The military doesn't do that. In the military this!" Rumble raged on. "We are not the military! we started this for fun! It's not like we have to defend Ponyville or save Equestria; That's what Twilight and co. are here for! Besides! You did not earn the rank of Sergeant yourself. You self-appointed it!"

"Well, somepony had to take the lead! We can't just be a bunch of colts doing whatever we want!" First Base retaliated.

"Um... Guys?" Button interrupted. "We are a bunch of colts doing whatever we want."

"Well, we should at least try to keep things in order! We can't spread panic and chaos over the streets of Ponyville with our missions."

"We don't have any missions!" Rumble shouted. "It's all just self-appointed, just like your rank. Speaking of your rank, you're just an NCO! You can't just decide what to do! Orders in your 'regular military' get passed from above!"

"Well I guess I should self-promote myself to a Lieutenant! After all, I could just off easily appointed myself as the captain of the PCAF! Or even Colonel! And maybe even General! After all, I started this!"

"We started this! And from all that self-talk of self-appointing about self-promoting is really starting to drive a bolt into my nuts! Next time, you can lock yourself away, and point at yourself with your finger, and ram it right into your..."

Snips and Snails we're just watchin in awe as the argument continued.

"We're going to be Corporals?" Snips asked his slender friend, who is just as confused as he is.

"I don't know," Snails replied. "I'm still not sure if this is an disagreement about the flight, or a heated argument that gets us nowhere."

"You're the rear gunner of the plane, so you better not make me..." Rumble continued.

"I thinks it's an argument." Snips whispered to his friend again.

Snails looked around, checking on the others. Pipsqueak was almost done with loading the guns, Tender Taps was giving the tires a final check, and Featherweight was still being tossed about.

"When are they gonna take-off?" Snails asked. "Everything's pretty much ready."

"I guess we're waiting for Featherweight." Snips replied.

"...And you can ask your MOM to help you with that!" First Base screamed at the top of his lungs.

"Hey! Leave my mom out of this!" Rumble exclaimed.

"You think we should intervene?" Snips asked.

"Nah. I think they got this under control."

"...How would your mom like THAT?!" Rumble screamed.

"I don't have a mother, I'm an orphan."

"Uh... Maybe we should," Snails said, changing his mind.

"Umm... Guys?" Snips interrupted. "You think we should maybe... I don't know... Take off?"

"Okay sure... um..." First Base scanned over the ponies in front of him, as well as the bi-plane. "Hey! Where's Featherweight?!"

"Right here!" A voice called for the door.

"Ah... Featherweight! Weather report!" First Base boomed.

"Yes! Relatively clear skies, no airborne migrations, wind is acting strange but predictable," Featherweight replied.

"Good!" First Base looked at the clock, "About time we should take-off! Let's get this thing out of here and up in the air!"

Everypony just looked at each other before Button raised a hoof.

"Yes, Corporal?" First Base looked at the Brown colt.

"Umm... How exactly are we going to do that?" He asked.

Everypony looked towards the Bi-plane, which had a wing span wider than five ponies with their hooves stretched across, and the makeshift, wooden door.

After eventually getting the bi-plane out, by blowing open a wall, the colts all stood on the dirt run-way with their helmets and googles with their magnificent creation as well as a table, two stools, a radio, a notebook and a pen, a ladder and a pair of binoculars.

"Alright gang!" First Base shouted as Button, Pipsqueak and Tender Taps pushed the plane into place. "Today will be our first test flight! Ground crew! How is everything going?!"

"All ready Sir! I meant eh... Sergeant!" Snips called out from the table.

"Giving final radio checks!" Snails reported.

"Good!" First Base grinned to himself, feeling all in control and seeing everything work out is extremely satisfying. All this hard work is going to pay off! However, little did he know, all that is going to change.

"Sergeant! Get your butt over here!" interrupted his thoughts as he snapped back to reality and turned to the source of the voice. There he see Rumble in the pilot seat of the plane, smirking at him as Pipsqueak and Button Mash boarded the plane.

"That's no way to treat your commander!" First Base shouted at the pilot.

"What do you mean 'Commander' Sergeant?" Rumble replied with a cheeky tone.

"We're not off the ground yet." He warned dreading the possible stunts Rumble can pull off on the earth pony.

Everypony was doing something to get the plane ready for take-off: Rumble was fiddling with the flaps, Pipsqueak was tuning the radio, Featherweight was strapping the 'B.O.M.B's (Blue Ominous Meteor Blasters aka Big Blue Water Balloons), Tender Taps was taking off the wood blocks around the tires, First Base was preparing the 'guns' with 2mm rubber bands, Snails was tuning the ground radio and Snips was climbing on top of the cabin, levitating a pair of binoculars.

"Crew, this is Captain speaking. Report!" Rumble shouted towards the colts on board.

"Signaller ready Sir!" Pipsqueak shouted.

"Bombardier ready Sir!" Tender Taps shouted.

"Wait... What... Rear gunner ready Sir!" First Base shouted, recovering from zoning out.

"Um... Extra crew member ready Sir?" Button Mash answered.

"Crew is ready!" Rumble boomed to the ground crew.

Snips set himself up on the cabin, pointing his binoculars at the plane, Snails gave finally radio-checks with Pipsqueak and Featherweight gave final instruction to the pilot.

"The wind is following a steady pattern!" Featherweight told Rumble. "Go on the east-west runway and wait for the wind! When wind blows from behind, power up! The wind will push you forwards, gaining speed, before stopping and blowing the other way! The wind going against you should give you lift! Above the cloud level, winds are relatively calm!"

"Roger!" Rumble acknowledged and strapped his googles on.

"Buckle up people!" He shouted as the crew strapped on their googles and seatbelts.

"Um... Captain. I don't have a seatbelt." Tender Taps said.

"Oh... just use that rope in the back, ensure you can quick release if things get shifty." Rumble casually said.

After taxiing to the correct runway and Tender Taps tying himself to his seat. The crew were ready for take off.

"0, Alpha, this is 1, Bravo. Permission to take-off? Over." Pipsqueak spoke into the radio, before hearing a crackling and slightly muffled reply.

"1, Bravo, this is 0, Alpha. Permission granted. Over."

"0, Alpha, this is 1, Bravo. Acknowledged. Out." Pipsqueak responded, cutting the line.

"You know that you can just say 'Roger'," Rumbled said, flipping a few switches and pulling a large wood crank, causing the engine to sputter. "It's much easier and quicker to say."

"I just prefer Acknowledged, more. It sound more official." Pipsqueak replied.

"How so?"

"It just does."

"That's what they all say." First Base muttered.

"Are you completely sure that this rope is adequate?" Tender Taps asked, his hooves vibrating at the fear of taking off on a crude plane they just made.

"Yes," Rumble answered. "Not just hold your tapping: We need this take-off as smooth as possible. How about some music to calm your nerves?" Rumble asked, flipping on a radio that was imbedded in the controls of the plane.

The sound of music rang through their ears, leading up the lyrics of the song.

"I didn't know you put a radio there!" Pipsqueak shouted over the music.

"I decided to personalise my cockpit to suit my needs." Rumble said, reclining his chair and sliding out a cup-holder.

"Those magnificent men in their flying machines. They go up-ditty up, up! They go down-ditty down, down!" The radio sang.

"What's a man?" Button asked out of the blue.

"I don't know," Rumble replied. "Apparently, this radio picks up signals from other dimensions."

"Other dimensions?" First Base cried out. "Rumble! Button! Where did you get these stuff?!"

Their reply was cut off as Featherweight, who was nearby, gave a large yank on the plastic propeller, using both his wings and leverage of his long legs, making the engine sputter more intensely before creating a loud hum and slowly, began to pulling the plane forwards.

Snips watched the plane accelerating forwards through his binoculars and shouted excitedly at the Snails to inform him. "They're moving!"

Rumble let the engine warm up as the wind began to slow down. The moment the wind picked up from behind, he increased throttle to max; storming the plane down the runway, picking up speed and kicking up dust from the ground.

The colts were shaking vigorously up and down. Tender Taps having the hardest time as he and his ropes were shaking even more vigorously.

The acceleration also pushed the rest of the colts to their limits: First Base as the rear gunner facing backwards, had his crudely stapled down seatbelts pulled to the limits, threatening to release him flying out of the air craft at each tiny bump. Pipsqueak's radio was vibrating largely due to the bumps on the rocky runway, barely holding together in one piece. And Rumble was focused on the wind and the runway. Flaring out his wings slightly, he sensed every small change in the wind. As the wind calmed down, and began to pick up again, he pushed the engine to the max and pulled the nose up. Plowing directly against the wind, the plane slowly pulled up, causing a few 'ooh's, 'ah's and screams, especially from Button and Tender Taps.

However, the plane pulled up too much from the wind, forcing the plane to go up almost vertical. The speed plummeted, as the plummeting began to pick up speed as the wind died down.

"Oh Sh-I-za Kofff!!!" First Base screamed as he stared at the ground coming closer to him.

The plane was only 30 metres (33 feet) up in the air as they started to plummet. Screams echoed around Rumble as he focused on the controls. Pulling a wooden lever, He set the flaps into combat mode; creating drag, however allows the plane to maneuverer more quickly.

He rotated the plane's wings to roll the plane over, belly pointing upwards, forcing the plane down to the ground towards a depression, picking up speed.

Snips could only watch in horror as the plane plummeted down behind a tree which was blocking his view.

Thanks to Rumble's aerial instincts, he slowly flipped the plane over on its wheels and pulled the nose up, engine working at max. Button Mash and Tender Taps were hugging each other for comfort as the plane's wheels bumped across the grass at the side of the ridge and then up and over the edge of the depression and into the air.

"Yes! Yes! YES!!!" Pipsqueak screamed into the radio, blowing up Snail's eardrums. "Rumble did it! We're Alive!!!"

Rumble grinned as the plane flew up into the sky, as cheers from his crew echo through his ears. Suddenly, the engine sputtered and died.

"They go up-ditty up, up! They go down-ditty down, down!" The radio sang.