• Published 27th Jun 2012
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Living in Equestria - Blazewing



A young man finds himself in a world beyond his wildest imagination...

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Scales and Arpeggios

The rest of the week just seemed to fly by after that, turning into a blur of candy and customers, all filled with a festive holiday cheer that demanded sweets and chocolates. Wednesday soon dissolved into Thursday, then Friday, and at last Saturday, where I had to tell myself that I didn’t have to go into work until 12. I still hadn’t seen Moonlight since she started work, but I hadn’t had much time for anything else anyway. Besides, she was doing fine; I had faith about that. Pinkie did return to restock her supply of candy, but this time I didn’t even attempt to stop her in the name of the bet. It was useless. I did have another visit from Rainbow, as well, who came to laugh at my apron again, but made up for it by giving me a bottle of water she had brought with her, saying I looked thirsty. I accepted the peace offering, though I think she let the water sit out too long; it tasted warm.

There were still two weeks left until Hearth’s Warming, but it seemed like an awfully short time, especially considering the fact that I now had a second job. I had to make a game plan in the meantime. It was going to be a busy time of year, and who was to say that most of the good gifts wouldn’t already be gone by the time I finally was able to start? I’d have to check out this Barnyard Bargains place Diamond Tiara told me about as soon as possible. If her father was wealthy enough to have employed a whole team of engineering ponies to make her Platinum Panther, he must have a very lucrative business. I could at the very least buy some holiday cards before planning for the big stuff. No need to splurge on what someone might not even want.

Boy, now I knew what my parents must have felt, getting everything ready for the holidays.

Speaking of, thinking about Hearth’s Warming approaching so rapidly made me think of home again. Around this time, I’d have been making a short Christmas list of gift ideas to give to my folks and send to my grandparents. Later on, we would pick up a tree, decorate it, and then the big day would arrive: all of us gathered around the tree opening presents, laughing, expressing our thanks to the senders, all around imbued with a spirit of warmth and good cheer. I wondered if Twilight had made any progress at all with that spell. Even if I couldn’t be home for Christmas, maybe I’d be able to send a card to my family, like I had the letter and photo.

I’d have to check with Twilight and see if it was at least possible. I just wished that spell wasn’t so darn particular, with every single star, planet, and celestial body needing to be in alignment for it to work. As much as I enjoyed living among these ponies, deep down, my heart still sorely yearned for home.

***

When closing time rolled around that Saturday, Bon Bon handed me a hefty bag of bits, around as heavy as what Ironmane gave me every week. If my calculations were correct (even though I stunk when it came to math), I was holding 230 bits in my hands at that very moment. The possibilities of uses for so much money sprang from my mind like water from a fountain. What kind of gifts for my friends and acquaintances could I get with this sort of cash? A few bits seemed to go a long way when purchasing necessities, though I’d still have to be prudent.

“Your first week’s wages, Dave,” said Bon Bon, crisply. “You’ve earned it.”

“Thanks a bunch, Bon Bon,” I said, stowing the bag away in my jacket. “I’m glad to be able to assist you and Lyra.”

“Well, we’re glad to have you aboard, newbie,” said Lyra, “especially at such a busy time.”

“By the way,” I interjected, “are we still on for those piano lessons you talked about?”

“Heck yeah! I’ve got some stuff to take care of tonight, but I’m free all day tomorrow. Drop by our house, and we can get started.”

“That works perfectly,” I said. “Good night, then, girls.”

“Good night!”

“Night!”

The three of us went our separate ways toward home. I intended to get a list started of ponies and potential gifts to get them, and then head to Barnyard Bargains the next day. I’d have to go early, so that I could return in time to see Minister Ironmane, and then head over to Bon Bon and Lyra’s for that piano lesson. My past self would have gaped at how much planning and activity I was engaging myself in at this time, as it hadn’t been in my habit to plan so many things to do for such a short amount of time.

When I got home, I took out a piece of paper and composed it thusly:

“Hearth’s Warming Gift Ideas for Friends”

Pinkie: ???
Twilight: ???
Fluttershy: ???
Applejack: ???
Rarity: ???
Rainbow Dash: ???
Spike: ???
The Crusaders: ???
Moonlight: ???
Derpy: ???
Sparkler: ???
Lyra: ???
Bon Bon: ???


That was a good enough start anyway, even if that wasn’t everyone. I’d add to it if any more inspirations came to me. Maybe if I ran into Pinkie in the near future, she could give me some ideas. She did know everypony in Ponyville, after all.

Saturday, December 10

***

After breakfast the next morning, I directed my steps to Ponyville’s shopping district, intending to scope out Barnyard Bargains. Actually, it was difficult to miss, as it stood out like a monolith compared to every other store nearby. It resembled the side of a barn, with the words “BARNYARD BARGAINS” written in big block letters across the roof. Ponies were filing in and out through the doors, so I joined those heading in.

It was as if I had just stepped into a Target or Walmart. There was a long line of cash register lanes lined up ahead, and behind them, a sprawling, massive collection of shelves and aisles packed with clothes, groceries, toiletries, and an assortment of other goods. Shopping carts stood at the ready, and a few ponies wearing buttoned shirts and name tags roamed the aisles, providing customer assistance.

“Neato,” I muttered to myself, impressed.

Since I didn’t have a clear idea of what to buy yet, and didn’t want to just splurge recklessly, I sought out where they kept the greeting cards. Back home, one of my favorite pastimes when shopping was to read through the greeting cards made for humor and laugh myself stupid. It was no different here, as though I was browsing for bulk holiday cards, I still managed to find cards that made me laugh. At last, I found boxes of holiday cards, from as small as 8 to as large as 100. I wanted to play it safe, so I bought two packs of 20, each costing 7 bits. That was already 14 bits gone, but not, I should think, wasted. With these in tow, I made for the checkout line.

“Well, hello, son! Glad you could finally stop by!”

I stopped where I was. A stallion had come right up to me and slapped a hoof on my shoulder, as if he were my uncle. There was something familiar about him.

“Aren’t you...Diamond Tiara’s father?” I asked, after pausing to consider. “I saw you at the derby when the carts crashed.”

“That’s right,” said the stallion. “Filthy Rich is mah name, but just call me Rich. Welcome to Barnyard Bargains!”

“Thanks. I have a feeling I’ll be visiting again pretty soon in the future. I’m just getting some Hearth’s Warming cards for now.”

“Ah, plannin’ a big shoppin’ spree for your friends?”

“Something like that.”

“Well, then, boy, you’ve come to the right place. Barnyard Bargains is the prime shopping chain in Equestria! Got outlets all across the country: Ponyville, Manehattan, Fillydelphia, Baltimare, Vanhoover, you name it, we’re there!”

“Wow. It’s reminded me even more of a couple store chains we have back where I come from.”

“That so? Well, you should feel right at home, then! I’ll let you get back to your shoppin’ now.”

“Thanks, Mr. Rich. And tell Diamond Tiara I said hello.”

“Will do, son, will do.”

With that, Filthy Rich departed to another part of the store, and I got in line at one of the less busy checkout lanes.

***

By the time I returned home, it was almost time for Ironmane to arrive, so I set the cards down on my kitchen table and waited. After our meeting, I’d head to Lyra and Bon Bon’s for that piano lesson. I wondered how long it would take to learn if we could only practice on Sundays, at least until after December, when there was the possibility that my part-time assistance wasn’t needed weekly. The funny thing was, every time I thought about playing the piano since Lyra brought up the lessons, I felt a strange kind of warmth in my head, almost like the heat I went through when I downed Zecora’s mental boost potion. Maybe it was just a coincidence.

At last, there came the telltale knock at the door. I went to answer it, and there stood Ironmane.

“Hello, Minister,” I said. “Any news on the dragon gem debate?”

“Not much has changed, David,” said Ironmane, “and it could very well stay that way if something isn’t done.”

“But what else is missing?” I asked. “What do these dragons want, besides more gems?”

“They want to have them readily available, is what. They’re a crafty lot, as I have told you before, and they won’t accept an agreement if their supply will run out without a way to replenish it. There is always an abundance in the Rambling Rock Range, but there’s the matter of the Diamond Dogs.”

“Ohh, right,” I said, remembering. “They were in that catalogue you gave me: subterranean canines who hoard treasure for themselves.”

“They claim that land now,” said Ironmane, “but it wasn’t theirs to begin with. It used to be a pony settlement, but the Diamond Dogs drove them away, claiming it as their own. Unfortunately, there are currently no means of effectively removing them without repercussion. We don’t wish to harm them, merely place them elsewhere. They’re quite stubborn, and previous attempts to reason with them have proved fruitless.”

“Quite the pickle,” I muttered.

“Indeed,” said Ironmane. “Your consideration is appreciated, David, but at the moment, this is a task for Brutus and myself. This impasse will dissipate itself in the end, mark my words. It’s a matter of making them want to end it first.”

He marked this by handing over my weekly pay.

“Thanks, Minister. By the way,” I added, on a thought, “how do you usually celebrate Hearth’s Warming?”

Ironmane’s brow furrowed slightly, and his mouth tightened. It didn’t look like the question was agreeable to him.

“I apologize, David, but I must be off. I shall keep you posted if anything changes. Good day.”

And without another word, he walked off through the snow. What had that been all about? Had I been too personal? Maybe I was, but I had thought it was a reasonable question. I just hoped he didn’t resent me for asking.

Whatever the case, I stowed the money away and, gearing up once again, headed out for Lyra and Bon Bon’s.

***

When I knocked at the door to the mares’ home, I had to wait a few minutes before someone answered. At last, the door cracked open, and I saw Lyra’s vivid orange eye peering through.

“What’s the password?” she asked.

“Password?” I asked, confused.

“No password, no entry.”

“Er, well, ok. Is it...swordfish?”

“Nope.”

“Is it...I am the walrus?”

“Nope.”

“Who’s on first?”

“Nope.”

“Who’s your daddy?”

“Nope.”

“Rosebud?”

“Nope.”

“Ruby red rutabaga?”

“Nope.”

“Lemon curry?”

“Nope. Wait, lemon curry?”

“Lyra, let him in, for Pete’s sake!” shouted Bon Bon from inside. “You’re letting in the cold air!”

“All right, all right, I was just having a little fun,” said Lyra, and she opened the door wider. “Just kidding, bud. Come on in.”

Gratefully, I stepped inside, took off my boots, and hung up my coat. On the inside, their house was very nice to look at, and reflected its occupants: cream-colored walls and mint-green carpeting. I could see doorways leading to a kitchen, a bathroom, and a bedroom, though another one was labelled ‘Bon Bon’s Testing Lab. DO NOT DISTURB’. That must have been where she cooked up new candy ideas. A fireplace was crackling abundantly on one side of the wall, opposite a big sofa, where Bon Bon was reclining. Along the mantle were photos of Lyra, Bon Bon, and ponies whom I guessed were each’s parents. Sitting next to the fireplace was a mahogany piano, and sitting on a shelf next to it was Lyra’s lyre.

“Good afternoon, boss,” I said.

“Hello, Dave,” said Bon Bon. “There’s no need for such formality when you’re our guest.”

“Yeah, relax,” said Lyra, “pull up a chair, kick off your shoes, scratch yourself, burp-”

“Lyra!”

“What, just telling him to make himself at home.”

“I swear, you hang around Vinyl much too often. She’s rubbing off on you.”

“Don’t you mean wubbing off on me?”

Lyra snickered, and Bon Bon just let out a frustrated groan.

“Anyways, Dave, let’s get you started. Plunk yourself down in front of the piano.”

I took a seat on the long stool in front of the piano, and Lyra sat herself beside me.

“So, have you ever played before?”

“Well, no,” I admitted. “I’ve only tried it a couple times on pianos and keyboards in stores, but that was just mindless key-mashing. I can picture certain melodies in my head, but have never learned to read sheet music.”

“Well, let’s try you on the scales, first, then we’ll go from there. You may surprise yourself.”

“Er, ok. Where do I start?”

“Right here.”

She tapped a key with one hoof, producing a note. Spreading my fingers out as I would on a computer keyboard, I placed my pinkie finger on that key she indicated, and played my way up each one. Lyra sang, tunefully,

Do re mi fa so la ti do

Then I worked my way back down, and she sang,

Do ti la so fa mi re do. Not bad. Those fingers you have really come in handy. Hee-hee! Handy. I’m on fire today!”

Bon Bon merely made a ‘Tsk’ noise, but I had hardly even noticed. The same warmth that had filled my head when I thought about the upcoming lesson was back again. It felt like a soft, gentle hand was stroking my scalp, as if it were trying to coax something out of hiding in my mind. All of a sudden, a simple, familiar melody floated into my head, and I found my fingers working of their own accord, as if the knowledge and remembrance of the tune had moved its way into them. Lyra looked on in surprise, and even Bon Bon lifted her head to look.

“How are you doing that, dude?” asked Lyra.

“I don’t know,” I said, just as baffled. “It just...came to me.”

“Well, don’t stop, cuz whatever you’re doing, you’re doing it right!”

Lyra looked absolutely jubilant, and I was pretty excited myself. This was amazing! It was such a small, simple piece, only a few notes strung together, but it was a melody! An actual piano melody! I was doing it completely by memory, and it was coming out just as I envisioned it!

With a flourish, I played out the final notes of the song, the last key’s tone reverberating with a triumphant sort of finality. Lyra and Bon Bon clapped their hooves.

“Bravo!” said Bon Bon. “That was very good!”

“That was amazing!” said Lyra. “I thought you said you’d never played the piano before!”

“I haven’t, really,” I said. “I can’t really explain how it happened, but the tune just came to me, and I played by ear. Now don’t let this give you the wrong idea,” I warned. “This doesn’t mean I don’t need more practice. If you’re willing, I still intend to come by and practice when I can.”

“Of course we’re willing,” said Lyra. “You’ve got a real passion for the piano, bud, and we’re happy to accommodate. Right, Bonnie?”

“Certainly,” said Bon Bon. “Have you had lunch yet today? I was going to get something hot started.”

“Oh, I don’t wanna impose-” I began.

“You’re not imposing,” said Lyra, throwing a foreleg over my shoulders. “Three’s company!”

(But I thought it was ‘two’s company and three’s a crowd’.)

“Besides, I’ve been waiting to have someone sit and listen to my latest melody. Bonnie’s a great judge of music, but I’ve gotta expand my audience.”

Bon Bon just rolled her eyes playfully and went to the kitchen.

***

The next hour or so was occupied with hot noodles and Lyra’s lyre playing. It still amazed me how a unicorn with such a boyish sense of humor could play so beautifully. It was almost as if holding the lyre in her telekinesis completely transformed her personality, made her into another pony. Bon Bon herself seemed mesmerized by the chords Lyra struck, and sat on the couch beside her eccentric friend, eyes closed and smiling in silent bliss. There were no words to Lyra’s song, just music: beautiful, sonorous music. Even though she said she didn’t mind not being part of a grand ensemble, I couldn’t help but picture her in the midst of an orchestra at a music hall, resplendent and dazzling, playing a solo on that lyre.

When she finally concluded, Bon Bon said,

“Lyra, that was wonderful.”

“Thanks, Bonnie,” said Lyra, “but what do you think, Dave?”

“Me? I’m with Bon Bon. That tune carried my imagination far and wide. It was beautiful.”

Lyra smiled.

“Well, I don’t want to seem like an ungrateful houseguest,” I said, “but I should be going. I’ll see you both tomorrow at work.”

“All right,” said Bon Bon. “It was very nice to have you over.”

“And, if you can get a chance, keep up on those piano skills,” said Lyra. “You’re off to a good start.”

“Thanks.”

Bidding the two candy-makers and music aficionados farewell, I bundled up in my snow gear and headed out. As I did so, I could hear Bon Bon chuckling through the door.

“Wub off on you...I get it now!”

“Ha! See? Told you I was funny!” said Lyra, triumphantly.

I had just started down the main street when-

*WHAM!*

I walked headlong into something that bounced me backward. When I regained my equilibrium, I saw that what I had collided with was Pinkie, who had also been knocked for a loop by the collision.

“Oh, gosh! I’m sorry, Pinkie!”

“Oh, it’s ok, Davie,” said Pinkie. “I knew I was gonna bump into someone. You know how ear flop-eye flutter-knee twitch means ‘watch out for opening doors’?”

“Er, yeah?”

“Well, ear-flop-itchy nose-rumbly tummy means ‘watch out for traffic’.”

“I see. Still, I’m glad I bumped into you, Pinkie.”

“So am I. I’m always glad to bump into a friend, unless they don’t like being bumped. Then I just hug ‘em!”

“How’s Moonlight doing so far, having gone through her first week?”

“Really well! She cleans fast for such a skinny thing, but she super cleans! Not a speck, crumb, or sprinkle stays behind when she’s on the job! Not just that, but when she’s all done with that, she’s always sitting at the counter, writing stuff on a piece of paper, crossing it out. She told me she’s trying to think of new slogans or ads for Sugarcube Corner! Neat, huh?”

“Yeah, that sounds really interesting,” I said.

“She’s always really tired when it’s closing time, but she comes into work as chipper as one of Fluttershy’s squirrels.”

“That’s good. I’m glad she’s found something she’s happy with. There was something else I wanted to ask you, though.”

“Yeah?”

“It’s kind of confidential, so can you keep it a secret?”

Pinkie nodded firmly, ‘zipping’ her lip. Then, she did a very bizarre pantomime: holding out her hoof as if she were displaying something, she lifted her other forehoof as if holding something over it. She gave her hoof a twitch, letting it fall over the other hoof, then, after screwing up her face in concentration and flinging her foreleg about in bizarre motions, she cooly mimed picking something up off the hoof with a flourish. I must have been crazy, but I could have sworn I heard a ‘Ta-da’ fanfare.

“Uh, what was that?” I asked.

“You’ve never seen the Magician’s Promise?” asked Pinkie. “It’s easy! Zip the lip, lock it up, now you see it, now you don’t!”

She grinned in that squeaky way of hers.

“Oh, of course. Silly me,” I said, dryly. “Anyway, Pinkie, you know everypony in Ponyville, right?”

“Yeah-huh!”

“Well, do you know what some may want for Hearth’s Warming? Like, say, our friends: Twilight, Rainbow, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Spike.”

Pinkie tapped her chin, a thoughtful pout on her face as she considered. I added, hastily,

“Not that I want to steal whatever ideas you yourself had, understand!”

Pinkie nodded to herself at last and said,

“I’m glad you came to me, Davie, because I think I know what you can get them for Hearth’s Warming.”

“You do? Great!”

“You got a pencil and paper on you?”

I felt around my pockets, but I didn’t have any on me. Of course, I’d never thought I’d need them, so I didn’t bother.

“It’s ok!” said Pinkie. “I’ve got my own!”

From out of nowhere, she produced a fresh sheet of paper and a pencil and handed them to me. I stared from them to her in bewilderment.

“How did you-?”

“Just a hunch!” said Pinkie, brightly. “Now, for Twilight…”

In a flash, I put the pencil to the paper, ready to take down what Pinkie had to say.

***

From what Pinkie told me, Twilight would have loved a new set of quills, preferably a pricey set of assorted exotic bird quills at Quills and Sofas; Rarity was yearning for a rare kind of vermilion silk produced only in the Canterlot boutiques; Rainbow hadn’t given any hints, but Pinkie had a hunch she’d love a Wonderbolts poster, possibly a new one containing a full depiction of every current team member, including some of its past, founding members; Applejack would be content to have some new, stronger rope for lassoing purposes; Fluttershy was a mystery, as she was not one to admit personal things aloud, but Pinkie assured me she’d do some discrete digging; and Spike had, for weeks now, expressed a desire for a new pillow for his basket, as his old one was starting to wear out.

I could get some of these things in Ponyville, to be sure, but some would have to be gotten in Canterlot, like the silk and poster. Still, a set of quills, lasso rope, and a pillow could be easily gotten here in Ponyville. Maybe I could get some further ideas for other ponies as time went on.

“Pinkie, you’re a holiday miracle,” I said, adding the final notes.

“Aww, thanks, Davie,” said Pinkie. “If I find out some more gift ideas, I’ll keep you posted, ok?”

“That’d be awesome. You’re the best, Pinkie.”

Pinkie beamed and, rearing up, gripped me in one of her tight Pinkie hugs. I grinned and reciprocated the gesture.

“Still, you’ve got a lot of friends now, Davie,” said Pinkie.

“Tell me about it,” I said. “That’s why I need all the help I can get. I’ve only got 2 weeks, and I don’t want to leave anyone out.”

“Well, you can count on me, Davie!” said Pinkie, releasing me and giving me a valiant salute.

“At ease, Private Pie,” I said, with a chuckle. “I appreciate it. I’ll see you around, Pinkie.”

“Okie-dokie-lokie! Bye!”

Pinkie bounced off, and I directed my steps back toward Ponyville’s shopping district to scope out those quills, then see what I could do about the rope and pillow. With Pinkie being my scout, this might not turn out so bad after all.

Sunday, December 11

Pinkie: ???
Twilight: New set of quills
Fluttershy: ???
Applejack: Lasso rope
Rarity: Vermillion silk (Canterlot)
Rainbow Dash: Wonderbolts poster (Canterlot)
Spike: New pillow
The Crusaders: ???
Moonlight: ???
Derpy: ???
Sparkler: ???
Lyra: ???
Bon Bon: ???

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