RandomBlank
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To be honest, i only read a quarter cuz it's quite late here but i think i will finish it as soon as i get up. Something new, really appriciate that.
My hoof of approval for this one.
Could at least one of the downvoters say what's your problem with this story?
Good story!
1239775 It was a troll for one of the downvotes...He was spamming last night...
What? No comments? SWEET!
...Haters gonna hate. I love this story, (that and i have an odd thing for zebras... theyre just so AWESOME!) But there was one part i couldn't understand wtf was going on... other than that i loved it!
1274656
Which one? It may need correcting...
WOW...
also...
lh5.ggpht.com/lqmgSA07GBuHUNUWu3Kf01_KB-hvuYdrHISGHmoFmB49k3NW7-AKbhib_8jvRZ0cqPmApr4=s152
Wow this story is good. A shame it got trolled. Keep writing man! Cheers.
I see its big , and it looks interesting.
But i will just wait for it to finish to read it. Good luck writing it.
wow, I should have gone to bed an hour ago.DAMN This story is Good!
Gonna' start reading this one - it's just recently caught my eye. Yet, something about it perplexes me. Your chapter lengths are... Well, some would say long (though I am inclined to say wonderful), yet you have almost no Thumbs Up, and almost half as many down votes. I find this troubling, because I doubt that anyone could write so much without: A) having a care for grammar and spelling, and B) having a premise that is, at least in their mind, captivating. Thus, I am immensely curious.
1384860
The story fell victim to a massive troll attack the day it was posted. It doomed its popularity. The first night, first chapter it was 10 downvotes, 9 upvotes, plus some 15 comments 14 of which were two trolls throwing insults back and forth. It might have been that the first chapter might have suffered a bit of "sequelitis" due to tie-ins with "Upon the Stars". But I think it would mean constant inflow of up- and downvotes in roughly the same proportions ever since, and instead the next 15 votes were universally "up".
The chapter lengths - I try staying at half the usual size of Fallout:Equestria and I still question if it's a right size - I could easily bundle 1+2, 3+4 and (upcoming) 5+6 into very self-contained entities of "three royal visits". Although 7 and 8 (which will conclude the story) will be quite apart.
As for style and grammar, I'll let you judge yourself once you start reading it.
1385286 Am in the middle of reading Upon the Stars at the moment, and while I think that the romance itself progresses a little too quickly - but hey, it's the one-night-stand to end all one-night-stands - if it's any indicator of how good your writing is, then I should definitely enjoy this.
I've only read the first chapter so far, but this gets a thumbs up from me.
Celestia doing martial arts? Yes please.
celestia needs to nut up and deal with her problems in bed
1392318
Thanks! And thanks for the catch. Import from Google Docs issue... Somehow the whole chapter got inserted into the middle of itself. I caught the beginning but not the end... (deleting your other comment to prevent spoilers)
1393163
There are kinds of problems that take many years to heal. And rear their ugly heads at the least convenient moments.
I love this. The clop is kinky as hell yet not disgusting. The story could use some more spellchecking and better style (sometimes quite hard to understand what is happening or who says what), but in the end, i really enjoy reading this.
Very good, So far this would have to go in my top 5 favorites. And that's out of 191 favorites. Your chapter's are definitely worth the wait. And the best part is that they keep getting longer
! Never let ANYONE rush you with this, take all the time you need to continue making future chapters as awesome as it is so far.
I really like how you make Celestia more down to earth. In most of these, she's always a super powerful being that only Discord can beat. The way you give her limits makes her seem more real and less OP.
So in short, Keep up the good work!
1394400
just asking, do you think you could maybe make these chapters shorter? 10-15k words/ch is just too much at once
1429948
Unfortunately my proofreaders have abandoned me before Entwine and I'm doing all the proofreading myself... and so, as the author, I lack the perspective of what my imagination fills and what needs to be said. One needs external insight for that and it's hard to find willing proofreaders for something this lengthy.
1430050
Sorry to disappoint but there are only two chapters of the story left. But on the other hoof, the next chapter, while shorter, is definitely more intense and darker than anything so far. (essentially, it is the last chapter, and the other one will be more of a lengthy epilogue....)
1430545
Next chapter will be 10k words, most of it is written already. Still not sure about the last, but it shouldn't be very long either...
Oh that is a shame. And i think i understand what you mean (the lack of objective insight) I keep trying my hand at writing and run in a similar issue, so in the end everything i create goes down the drawer. I respect what you do, and as i said, i find the story captivating and really enjoyable. Work out the "technical" kinks and i would not hesitate to call it great writing.
What you created feels lively and got that immeasurable quality.
lol foursome
oh god this is even more brilliant-er than ever.
DO go on
PS Naughty naughty zebbers :D
The last chapter may come out a bit delayed.
I had planned to add a short, fun adventurey segment. And then the inspiration struck. The bitch.
Good news, it came out much more epic than I had planned, and is well on par with "The Past" in epicness. Bad news, that adds a whole bunch of proofreading and editing and that takes time.
Also, as "The Past" came a full circle with the first segment of "Late Night Guest", "The Future" will come a full circle with "Upon the Stars".
19 THOUSAND WORDS!!! i.imgur.com/ViY7j.gif
i40.tinypic.com/15yqyq.gif
2.bp.blogspot.com/-LO4qcGPBLbs/Twyx68HezFI/AAAAAAAAak0/_o7mHmjgaiU/s1600/110087+-+artist+zlack3r+artist+zlacker+book+crying+filly+sad+twilight_sparkle.png
I see what you did there.
1529541
Ask Red Eye prides itself in *never* getting out of character. So if the author's gonna pimp his story, gotta do that in character too.
Not to mention this was inspired by Fallout:Equestria, a story which I hate to love, which I tried to avert twice already (once with an unfinished story about Littlepip finding a Stable that was not fucked up, which fell flat on its face, and once with Ask Red Eye, a sympathy for the devil approach, which was fine for an original story but fell a bit short of its goal.) This one averts FoE thoroughly enough for my liking.
So this be the end, then?
Of course my playlist pulled this up when I got within sentences of the end. I'm keeping an eye on you for future stories.
You sif, are a proper writer.
I laughed, i cried. I loved it.
In a way it saddens me to see "Completed". A great thing is over...
Lol nadir is now a lich-king
1529595 I read the first chapter quite a few months ago (I think following a link to you on the PHCC), but didn't track it or realize that you would write anything beyond that—reading it as a one-shot is certainly possible. I pulled up the link again several weeks ago and kept it in my rather large list of tabs, and finally got around to reading it the day before yesterday, before finishing it just now. I had forgotten you had written it until chapter 7, when I finally looked at the header, and had forgotten how I got here until I read that comment, but I did definitely notice the Fo:E subversion around the coal/clean power discussion. I'd say this was successful. I still prefer Ask Red Eye (there were a few places where this seemed like it could possibly use a(nother) pass or two by a pre-reader), but I really like what you've done; the plot-to-clop ratio was really balanced nicely (as much as I say I read these things for the plot, there's two meanings to that), and the story itself was quite fun as well.
1587264
Well, thank you :)
*sigh* getting proofreaders is hard. The last chapters could definitely use some.
As for subversion, it reaches beyond that. Relationships with Zebras reaching way beyond friendly. Luna actively fighting Celestia's blunders concerning relationships with other races. Celestia and Luna fortifying their position of power against corrupt elites. Implied Celestia and Nadir's tour resolving long-overdue mystical problems (EoS!). Removing all incentives for war.
Well, Gryphons are still a problem and who knows what happens to Minotaurs, not to mention Thistle was only the first of quite a few, and who knows, if he was recovering sentience, what about others? - but the FoE as we know it was averted.
This is horribly under appreciated.
My hats off to you, sir.
Oh gosh. This is the best Celestia story I have ever read.
I admire your evident prowess in the field of computer science, it clearly shows you know what you are doing. As a matter a fact I almost enjoyed being confused by the programming terminology. As a supporter of this story, I want to say that you should keep in mind that these are immortal princesses, and they shouldn't be portrayed as average individuals overcoming the common problems in life. I understand that it is easier to relate to a character if s/he is going through the same issues as you, but there are just some parts in the story that just make me think the princesses are fallacious. Other than that, your grammar is very close to flawless, and you have a good sense of plot (tee hee). Good luck on any future endeavors.
2476887
wait... "Upon the Stars" had some computer science. In "Prince..." it's almost all made up - spellductors, transmogrifiers? :) (oh, yes, the piece with Light discovering a hardware bug was quite technical but that's like one paragraph long!) Anyway, past 2nd chapter most of it is gone.
As for princesses overcoming the problems of daily lives - Just who are the princesses personally is not defined by canon, and I took a lot of artistic liberties here.
I choose to make them very much the same as mortals, except never aging. They do forget, they do make mistakes, they have their phobias and their dislikes. And despite gathering immense experience and enormous knowledge over their long lives, versatility, and learning how to deal with great most situations, they are not the best at everything: at any given point of time there will exist a pony who can best a princess in one single domain - and there will be at least one such pony for each domain there is. Maybe except raw magical power. Lifting the Sun requires lots of it.
Oh, and there is always something they don't know. World changes faster than any entity within it can observe. New books are written faster than fastest reader could read them. The princesses simply can't know everything. And they do have their own hang-ups. Luna is very introverted and quite socially awkward, and Celestia is deadly scared of failing. She goes to extra lengths to avoid risks, and will avoid acting unless trouble find her or her inaction would lead to even worse consequences - when she dares to act, she rocks, but she only rarely does - and if she makes a mistake, she's feeling obsessively guilty about it.
Now, seeing your preferences, you may not like my upcoming story, where Luna is acting almost like a spoiled filly, but if I ever get to finish the next one... Let's say this kind of relationship I explore there is not common on Fimfiction: Goddess Luna and her most faithful believer.
Also, thanks for the long comment. Did I say I love long comments? I love long comments!
Wow, that was a story. It did explain the human life with moon. This was a long long story. just the way I like it. are you going to rite more? Now that they will have new body's? It has been fun reading this hole story in one sitting. Thar is steal more that can be written on the story. there is family and friends and new dangers you can add to the mix. I hate to see the story end. ('
');
Like Dragonfox, I had to read this in one sitting, more or less... I actually didn't go to sleep last night because of this story! First FIMFiction story to ever cause that! So I hope yer happy for yerself, cause I won't forgive you unless you write a sequel about Light and Nadir in their new bodies.
2945113
Thanks for the kind words and yay for being addictive.
No, considering Prince of Zebras was a sequel to Upon the Stars (and as result fans of the 7k words story got 117k words extra) there is no way in hell I'm writing a direct sequel to this one. But there are others in the works that may see the daylight if I get through... objective difficulties.
2953176 Aww
Oh well, hope some of them happen in this same universe then, to find out what's happening with the couples! 
head.... hurts.... too much computer stuff....
3197596
Most of it made up.
Although Half-NOT is a nerd humor of purest water.
And you liked it in the end, didn't you?
I find it sad that you did not write a sequel to this story.
It wood have been a good story. 
Dragonfox
My God I almost forgot im only two chapters in. So long. So much story.
ITS FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!
3888823
Thanks for the praise. I hope you don't mind me deleting the spoiler comment?
So Luna can heal him, but not cure him? Ok...
3947038
Some poisons are more devious than others. Plain stunning sedative is simple enough. Now, the Crown Venom...
Oh, Zephyr, jealousy is such an ugly thing.
SEQUEL NOWWWWWW!!!!!!
best story ive read plz sequel