> M/M shipping

> Incest

dis gunna be good

Seriously though, this is going to be interesting.

Though I'm sad that Granny Smith isn't in the tags, her reaction would be... interesting.

EDIT: Removed non-kosher image.

Gay shipping? Allow me to read with heated passion.

I wonder what Applejack's going to think of this.

I can just feel the awkwardness of not recognizing your own cousin. If you're able to capture the characters' feelings in the reader, it's a sign of serious talent.

So anyway, I'll just leave this thumb and a star...

-SoI

This looks awesome so far. Its kinda hard adjusting to this pairing though after reading all of your Soarburn stuff. xD I'll always prefer them over Braeburn and Big Mac. But this story seems to be shaping up awesomely :D Thumbs up and a favorite for you my friend!

Meow me gonna like this meow

Seems cute (especially with blushy Big Mac). Though with the incest issue I can see how this isn't going to go well. Still, with Breaburn and Big Macintosh I can't resist reading!

meh here we go i guess

>>828445828445 Aren't you the enthusiastic one.

Like. Fave.

Now we play the waiting game.

I feel so wierd reading this....... Should I like? What if it goes somewhere less innocent........

>>828481828481 Considering I'm a fade to black man, and it will be somewhere along the same lines of Winding Roads when it comes to subtly... yeah, go ahead and like it...

THUMB IT UP NAO!

Or... don't...

...

>>827996827996 IN THE TAGS NAO!

You've really improved on writing accents recently. They're really more genuine, not nearly as contrived and forced~!

Braeburn x Mac wincest?

Image: http://i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/002/252/me-gusta.jpg

>>828579828579 Considering the fact both main characters speak in accents, it would be horrid if I didn't know how to write them.  

Hey! I'm really liking it!!!!! please continue it!

>>828528828528

MAY THE SHIT HIT THE FAN

salute

>both Mister and Miss Cake both wanted to use them for Apple Fritters

>both Mister and Miss Cake both

>both

*Cough*

Big Mac's kinda dumb in this.  Guy comes to town matching the description of the guy that was supposed to come to town that day, mention he was expecting to meet his cousin, came because his mom wanted him to find a filly, and is the only pony in town with that same accent.

"Who the hay could that delicious piece of plot possibly be?"

>>828925828925 Well, that's why I clearly stated he felt like an idiot once the connection was obvious...

And I'll go and fix that mistake...

Really nice first chapter.  You got the personalities down pretty well and it's an interesting dynamic you've set up.  While neither pony recognized the other (heck both of them overlooked each others apple cutie marks), they both got a rather unique first impression minus the cousin detail, which I can see leading to some rather unusual circumstances.  Can't wait to see how this plays out.

>>828937828937

Derp.  Don't know how I missed that.

Looks good, I realize Big Mac couldnt place him, but it felt weird knowing that was his cousin...

I've forgotten my cousins several times xD

This is the first M/M ship I've read that's a whole story instead of a short, so have a thumb, a star, and an impatient reader C:

>>830762830762 Oh crap, not another one!

Why do you follow me?

>>830342830342 Well the tag is romance, SO LET THE AWKWARDNESS SINK THE B IN!

>>833196833196

Sorry if I sound like an annoying fan girl but... OMG STORMSOUL REPLIED TO ME, sorry but, I really like your work! It gets me so excited everytime you have a new story out or a new chapter, anyways... The chapter looked great besides Big mac's memory

>>833196833196 are you familiar with the anime and manga Koi Kaze? Btw: in one part you called him Braeburn before Big Mac found out who he was

>>833976833976 Watched the whole anime, and yes this episode was sort of based on the first episode of that series...

I'm so unimaginative...

>>834022834022 don't sweat it I'm making a story inspired by Ben X (not Ben 10)

Your grammar's improving!

Nothing real bad to say about it, but at the same time nothing real spectacular about it either, imo. It's the first chapter, so shit-spewing fans are kinda low right now and that's understandable. One thing I do want to see change, though, is how many times you repeat the same piece of information. for example, you already described Big Mac's confusion as to why he was approaching Braeburn when he should be doing other things with this line:

But something… perhaps the golden flowing mane, or simply the way he was acting held his attention no matter how hard he tried to push it away.

But then you continue to say that he's confused twice after that before they even leave the scene. Just spice up the actions and descriptions a bit.

Also, just to add a last thing to practice before the next chapter: try to show more instead of telling. Don't directly say that "Big Mac blushed" (especially since this happened what seemed like a dozen times in this chapter, another example of the repetition problem). If this particular blush is important (I would say maybe either the first encounter or the second encounter would be the best place for this), then describe how Big Mac feels. He could suddenly feel warmer, which may cause him to sweat more under the hot summer sun, or he could feel suddenly light at the sight of Braeburn's emerald eyes as they stared innocently into his. It gives the same information across, but it's pretty.

I hope to see more!

I'm looking foreword to this, ackword pairings are best pairings. Update when you can.

>>834265834265 I used the word blush like a million times in Winding Roads... chapter 2... the first time I wrote it...

i just hope this dosent interfer with entangled pathways i want to see that one finshed so bad

I started reading this and I was all: Noes, not the incest! Then I started thinking about why that would be wrong between the two stallions. And I couldn't find one reason for them not to. Ya learn something new every day, huh.

> Braeburn galloped up to meet Applejack, hoping in the back of his mind that him leaving before Big Macintosh could reply had hurt the red stallion in some way.

That could be worded better.

And wow, Big Mac is acting... interestingly.

>>974078974078 *Facehoof* this chapter was a real bitch, I think that was the point in my first writing session I began to feel slow... I'll fix it now.

Really difficult dilemma, you did really well fleshing it out.

I am liking this.  

I love stories like this, I just cant wait for those big moments like when Applejack or someone finds out, or Brae and Mac coming to relies their feelings.

I await your next page with words (bow) until then I must retire to the giant pillow of springs and tarp coverings.

Any news on an update?

>>12767381276738 Uh...

I'm suddenly having a major urge to write this after seeing... this...

Image: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_maerlw2tgW1ry8es5o1_500.jpg

Pls for to write more.

Quite interesting. I like this Braeburn better than the one in Entangled Pathways.

Y U NO UPDATE

>>25811022581102  BECAUSE IT WAS A BAD STORY.

>>25811072581107

Aww come it wasn't that bad that you should stop it. IMO felt pretty cool and fresh in comparison to the usual CarMac and SoarBurn. The only problem is the idea if incest...

>>25811232581123  Funny enough I'm currently writing a CaraMac and SoarBurn...

I don't know... this story was one I didn't think through... I didn't want to write it, I just wanted to write something different... I should have kept it a oneshot or something.

>>25811302581130 Well that would explain why you stopped, still your story and I enjoyed it quite a bit. I love all your stuff just this one was so open ended and made my tummy feel funny.

(btw I LOVE CarMac and SoarBurn its just this one felt "new")