The Horrors of Inappropriate Amounts of Lotion

Spike has found the wonders of proper moisturization. Unfortunately for him, Twilight doesn't approve.

Written for the Soft Hands Contest

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 16 )

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Waterpear

Waterpear #1 · Jul 28th, 2016 · 14 · ·

“If he’s got as much blood in him as some of his…other fluids…he’ll be fine.” Twilight laughed herself.

other fluids

God damn it. I thought the semenverse was dead,

Root Beer

Root Beer #2 · Jul 28th, 2016 · 2 · ·

7431892 You expected the semenverse to be dead? Too bad. WALUIGI TIME!

bloons3

bloons3 #3 · Jul 28th, 2016 · · ·

Minor nit-picky grammar issues, but I liked the story overall.

Cracked Egg

Cracked Egg #4 · Jul 28th, 2016 · 5 · ·

wat

Valen Machina

Valen Machina #5 · Jul 28th, 2016 · · ·

Well, this was readable but not really worth a thumbs up. I honestly thought it would be funnier.

Hillbe

Hillbe #6 · Jul 28th, 2016 · · 1 ·

lotion? I hope he was exclusively thinking of moi!

Griseus

Griseus #7 · Jul 28th, 2016 · · ·

Seem to have made a wrong turn here on this site. Neat.

Jingle_Boii

Jingle_Boii #8 · Jul 28th, 2016 · · 2 ·

Random title name, seemingly pointless description of the story and the story itself being little over 1,000 words? A little more thorough thinking, funny hues and hints, without the dark and gore tag, as well as another 2,000 words at least to give the story a...a little more story and done right, would have probably very well improved your ratings.

Maze Tail

Maze Tail #9 · Jul 28th, 2016 · · 2 ·

Bahahahaha The funny thing is she would do that.

Ebola-chan Ganbatte

Ebola-chan Ganbatte #10 · Jul 28th, 2016 · 6 · ·

7432291
So basically you think it'd have done better if it was an entirely different story? I guess it could have. I'll have to ask alternate universe Bubonic Plague-chan Ganbatte to see how her fic's doing.

HiddenMaster

HiddenMaster #11 · Jul 28th, 2016 · · ·

Well, that was gloriously stupid.

Jingle_Boii

Jingle_Boii #12 · Jul 29th, 2016 · 1 · 1 ·

7433084 I'm not implying to totally change it. It's a neat idea, and I was only giving suggestions to possibly make it better. I like trying to help others :)

PresentPerfect

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