The Life and Times of Benjamin Inventor (Part 1)

by Bsherrin

I Move to Ponyville

I Move to Ponyville

I settled in Ponyville and was doing well enough. Twilight was my first customer when during one of her visits she noticed I’d made myself a kickdown door stop and asked me to make her four. That took off and I ended up filing a patent for them. I’d learned to shape metal with my magic and made and sold dozens of doorstops at 5 bits apiece (only the best quality, of course), a profit of 3 bits per unit for me.

The Ponyville blacksmith had retired a few months earlier, so a number of the local farmers came to me for their smithing which I was more than happy to do. I first met Applejack when Granny Smith came by the shop and asked me to stop by the farm to repair one of their plows. I went to the farm the next day and Granny Smith pointed me to Applejack who ran the farm’s day-to-day operations. Applejack was friendly enough but very shy with me; apparently she hadn’t spent all that much time around stallions other than relatives and never around unicorn stallions. There weren’t all that many unicorns in Ponyville to begin with and I estimated the ratio was 1:2:10 (unicorns to pegasi to Earth ponies).

Business began to pick up and I joined the Stable of Commerce. I made some excellent contacts there including Filthy (“Call me Bernie!”) Rich, Lyra Heartstrings who owned a music store and Rarity who ran an upscale boutique. Rarity was not only one of the Mane Six (who gained notoriety after Celestia named them all Protectors of the Realm) but was also an outstanding dancer. We went out a few times and eventually became ballroom dance partners. We talked romance as well and just as we were moving closer, I had my first encounter with the Magic of Equestria. That was one of those forces that everypony seemed to know about but no one actually understood. It was also the Guide the Authorities said I’d meet; I just Knew that although I’m not sure how. For no reason I could see, the Magic urged me away from Rarity. Apparently Rarity Felt something as well since we ended up just dance partners and nothing else. I was not pleased to say the least. I could have disobeyed since I had Free Will but this was the Guide; best to listen even though I didn’t like it much.

I missed Canterlot, Shining Armor and of course Sunny, so I threw myself into growing my business and did well. Soon ponies from the surrounding countryside heard about my various skills and I ended up making day trips to some of the outlying farms. That put me in a perfect position to make a vendor list for the Grand Galloping Gala after the Chancellor wrote me and asked for my help buying supplies.

I wrote him back I’d be glad to do it and a few days later who should appear in the workshop but the stallion himself. I was working on version of a steam engine I hoped I could use for a small car when I heard the bell on the workshop door ring.

“Right with you,” I called out. I’d just finished shaping a cylinder and forgot I was carrying a connecting rod as I walked into the waiting room.

“So you’re a mechanic now,” said the Chancellor, making a show of looking me up and down.

“Chancellor! A pleasure to see you, sir!” I said delightedly, swapping the rod to my left hoof shaking his hoof with my right. “Yes, mechanic, blacksmith and general oddsbody. I unstopped a drain yesterday for the Widow Grass since the local plumber was on another job. Got some wonderful blackberry preserves for doing that. I play the piano two nights a week at the pub, too.”

The Chancellor chuckled as he returned the shake. “What pony would have thought it?” he said. He became serious for a moment. “Have you hung out your shingle as a healer yet?”

I held up a hoof. “I’ve tried to keep that very quiet. I asked around and the ponies here haven’t had a resident healer for a good 200 years. I’m not sure how they’d take to one just dropping in. You remember how it was in Canterlot with the doctors?”

“All too well. Miserable primitives.”

“Heh. Speaking of, how’s your knee?” I bent over to check the Chancellor’s left front knee which looked very good.

“No more swelling and good as new.”

“Excellent. Still, you’re here on business. This way to my office, if you please.” I put the rod on the workbench and escorted the Chancellor to a small office just off of the workshop. I offered him a snifter of brandy and we settled in a couple of comfortable chairs.

Chancellor pulled a paper out his pouch and handed it to me. It listed 50 or so vegetables including parsnips, turnips, greens and kale along with various fruit, all in alphabetical order. Each had an amount in pounds and bushels.

“This is what I need for the Grand Galloping Gala.”

“When is it again?” I asked as I looked over the list. 250 pounds of parsnips, I thought. Good grief.

“Four months. It’s on the last day of Tenth; it actually started as a harvest festival. I hoped you could arrange to get all of this to Canterlot. Year before last we didn’t have any contacts at all in the farming community and ended up well short of what we needed. The quality wasn’t the best, either, since we had to go halfway to Hoofington.”

“Hmmm, Sidesaddle Farm raises parsnips, Sweet Apple Acres has apples of course along with some cherries and peaches. Brickleback should have more than enough turnips in a couple of months…” I went down the list and matched it to the farms I’d visited.

“If you’d do it, the Crown would be most grateful. The Crown will pay for all the produce, of course, along with any expenses. You’d get a modest salary as well. And,” said the Chancellor making a show of looking around the room, “the personal thanks of her Highness.”

That certainly got my attention. I’d missed Sunny more than I imagined I could miss anypony, so I’d have used any excuse to see Tia again.

“I’ll do it, certainly. What’s the plan?” I asked since I knew the Chancellor always had one.

The Chancellor relaxed a bit once I agreed. “You’ll need to get all of this to the Ponyville freight depot and loaded on the cars three days before the Gala. We’ll have a special ready which will go straight to Canterlot with the goods. You’d travel with them, help unload and then stay until just after the Gala to help clean up. You always were better at cleaning and organizing than anypony and several of the staff begged me to ask you to help them with the preparations and takedown.”

I made a big show of examining my right front hoof. “Yes, it’s true, it’s true. How ever have you managed without me?”

The Chancellor smiled, then sobered slightly. “We’ve missed you. I’ve missed you, more than I expected, particularly since I don’t miss ponies. And Herself…well, she just looks wistful whenever your name comes up. I found her crying once but she apologized and said something was in her eye.”

I had no answer to that, so I just stared at the ground. “She’s well?”

“Busy coping with Princess Luna along with her other duties. I’d hoped to have a good Gala this year as a sort of gift.”

“Well, sir, you may count on me!” I said decisively.

“Good stallion! I’ll send you the details over the next few days and you can get started.” The Chancellor stood and I escorted him to the workshop door. We shook hooves again.

“Good to see you, Chancellor.”

The Chancellor looked thoughtful, then looked me right in the eye. “My family calls me Clarence.”

I knew what a great honor it was for a pony to share their Private Name. “Thank you, Clarence. I’ll see you in four months.”

After the Chancellor left, I started right in. I took a couple of days a week over the next few weeks to visit the farms again, this time with credit chits and ledger book in hoof so I could keep track of who was going to do what. The farmers were glad to get the business and all agreed to get the produce to the station on the appointed day. I told them if it strained their resources to let me know but all insisted they’d manage.

I left Sweet Apple Acres until last since it was closest to Ponyville. I walked there one beautiful Summer’s day and knocked on the door. To my surprise, Applejack answered; Granny Smith usually stayed in to take orders while the others worked.

“Why, Applejack, how nice to see you again,” I started.

Applejack reddened slightly. “Howdy, Mr. Inventor. Won’t you come in?”

We took a seat in the office which was just off of the huge kitchen. Applejack brought me some of the justifiably famous Apple Brand apple cider. I wondered idly as I drank it if I could build a machine to squeeze apples.

“Granny Smith not here today?” I asked.

“She’s takin’ her yearly trip to Appleloosa to visit the other side of the family.”

“Why, that’s fine! I’d hoped to take that trip myself soon.”

After the pleasantries, I got down to business. I’d need 30 bushels of apples, 5 of cherries and 5 of peaches. Most cherries came from out West but I told her I preferred local if she had it.

Applejack stood and walked to a rolltop desk stuffed with papers of all sorts. I watched her move and enjoyed the way her muscles shifted under her skin. She had an excellent figure, kept so by farmwork no doubt. She really was very pretty if a bit rough around the edges.

I’d drifted enough I missed what she said when she turned around.

“Say again, Applejack, if you please?”

“Uh…well, we can help you, Mr. Inventor, no problem. And we’re right proud t’ have them fancy ponies eatin’ produce from our farm.”

“Very good, very good,” I said. I made an entry in my ledger, then made out a chit for the cost which was actually very reasonable; Applejack already knew the delivery date since word got around quickly. As I handed over the chit, I remembered I’d seen Applejack last week as I took my daily walk.

“Applejack, I saw you running in the woods last week. I waved but you didn’t see me. Were you in a hurry to get somewhere?”

Applejack flushed from the tips of her ears down to the base of her neck. “Ah…I, uh…ya see, I compete. In th’ rodeo…and…well, working on the farm is fine and all, but I run to…” Applejack ran out of explanation, then. I decided she just liked to run for the fun of it and was embarrassed to say so.

“You know, I’ve done a little in that line myself. I was steeplechase champion of the Royal Guard.”

Her ears swiveled forward and she became animated. “Do you…suppose you could give me a few pointers? That’s my weakest event.”

“Oh, absolutely,” I agreed. I thought a moment. “I’ve become a bit soft with opening the workshop and all. May I run with you some evenings?”

Here came the blushing again. “Sure,” Applejack said, at least looking at me this time.

“Well, since we’re going to spend some time together, please call me ‘Benjamin’ or ‘Ben’ if ‘Benjamin’ is too long.”

Applejack nodded, this time with a slight smile. We agreed to meet halfway between the farm and the workshop an hour before Sunset the next day. I said I’d see her then and waved a farewell as I headed back up the road. I was humming to myself and I noticed for the first time since I’d come to Ponyville my heart wasn’t quite so heavy.

I like her, said the Magic of Equestria in the back of my head.

Me, too, I thought.

The Gala

The time just flew by and before I knew it, I was at the freight depot before Sunrise waiting for the produce to arrive. I enjoyed listening to the slow chuffing of the waiting locomotive which sounded far cleaner since I’d fixed one of the exhaust valves. The engineer, Roundhouse, was fascinated I could heat a boiler with magic, too. My breath steamed in the cold air; Winter was just around the corner.

Very soon I heard a clop-clop-clop of a pony and out of the mist came Spring Brickle, a good sized, calm Earth mare and the oldest of the four Brickle fillies. She was hauling one of the standard farm carts as if it weighed nothing at all.

“Miss Brickle!” I called out. “Greetings!”

“Howdy, Mr. Inventor! Care for some turnips?”

“I can’t wait,” I laughed. “On the loading dock, if you please.”

I helped Spring load the turnips into one of the crates I had ready, and then used a bit of magic to load it into the freight car. Usually magic wasn’t necessary since we had more than enough hooves and it made some Earth ponies uncomfortable as well. This time, though, we were on a tight schedule so I used it as well as my hooves. As the Sun came up there was a line of ponies (including Applejack, I was pleased to see) pulling carts filled with produce. I filled crate after crate, checking off the produce and marking each crate as it went into a boxcar. By 8, the last cart and come and gone and I had four boxcars full of fresh fruit and vegetables.

I had a quick breakfast and hopped into the cab at 8:30. I waved to the station master who sent the signal up the line and we were on our way. About a half mile out, Roundhouse, firepony and I all grinned at one another.

“Ready, stallions?” I said, rubbing my front hooves together.

“Yes, sir,” both answered at once. The firepony opened the fire doors and I sent a blast of magic into the firebox.

“We got us a wizard on board, boys, so no company notch for us! We’re a’beatin’ her on the back!!” Roundhouse yelled as he pulled the Johnson bar back and opened the throttle all the way. The engine surged ahead as he lay on the whistle and we all yelled out the windows like scalded cats: “Whoooohoo!” It was good to be alive.

We made it into Canterlot at 2:14, 16 minutes ahead of schedule, but still found the Chancellor and a squad of the Royal Guard waiting for us.

“You made good time,” said the Chancellor as I jumped from the cab and shook his hoof. Roundhouse and the firepony looked innocent and I just nodded. “You have the goods, I take it?” the Chancellor continued.

“All set,” I said as I handed over the bill of lading. I walked over to the squad which was in fatigues. I thought I recognized the squad leader.

“Jenson? Corporal Jenson? That is you, isn’t it?”

“Lieutenant,” said Jenson, saluting. “Good to see you again, sir. But it’s Sergeant Jenson now,” he said, proudly showing me his third stripe.

“Hah, well done!” I said as I retuned the salute. “I’d say you earned that one, am I right?” Sergeant Jenson just grinned. A good stallion, Jenson. I met the other burly Earth pony squad members, two of which I knew already. Behind them was a flatbed with long hitch made for six ponies and a lead.

“Got you doing scut work, then?” I asked.

“Yes, sir,” answered Jenson. “We’re to help you get the produce to the kitchen.”

The Chancellor had the bill of lading on one hoof and was holding a small abacus in the other. I could hear him making calculations. “Let’s see…48 crates in the first three boxcars and 42 crates in the last. 186 divided by 12 per is a little over 15 trips. At 20 minutes per trip, that’s…”

“Five hours exactly,” I finished for him.

Chancellor looked up with one of his quick grins; he loved mathematically inclined ponies. “So it is,” he said. “Do you need help loading the crates onto the flatbed? I can get another unicorn here in an hour or so or a couple of stevedores from the other depot?”

I checked and even though I was slightly fatigued, I had enough magic left. “I can manage if these mokes can haul the flatbed. They look a little puny and undernourished to me,” I said, gesturing with a hoof to the squad.

“We can manage, sir,” said Jenson as the other squad members grinned like wolves. “We just hope you can keep up.”

“Oh, really, Sergeant? Let’s find out, shall we?”

The Chancellor, pleased at my efficiency, just laughed and then said he’d be at the other end with another squad offloading the crates onto the kitchen loading docks. I waved as he trotted off, and then turned as the squad moved the flatbed next to the first boxcar.

“And away we go!” as I said as I lifted the first crate.

The Chancellor’s math was dead on and we moved briskly. The last load had 16 crates which pushed the stallions a bit but they managed it. The offloading went well, too, and we all gathered at the kitchen loading dock a little after 8:30.

“Well done, stallions!” said the Chancellor. “The kitchen staff has something for you.” The staff had started to unload and wash the fruits and vegetables and had set out some of the choice ones for the squads and me to eat. And eat we did.

Our late supper over, I returned Jenson’s salute, shook hooves and said I’d see him and the squad at the Gala. We were to be what the Guard called “window dressing”, stationed throughout the palace in our formal uniforms. I had the slightly larger role of supervising the #2 Ballroom and #2 Parlor, but with ponies as well trained as the palace staff, I doubted I’d have much to do.

The Chancellor and I were the last to leave. We watched the organized chaos of the kitchen for a few minutes, and then wished each other a good night. I made my way to my old quarters which were exactly as I left them. I was too tired for any nostalgia, though, and after a quick shower, fell into bed and knew no more the rest of the night.

I woke up at Sunrise the next day, refreshed and ready to go. I went through my usual morning ablutions then went downstairs to the officer mess hall. There were a few ponies there already and they greeted me like a long-lost brother which pleased me no end. I had a hearty breakfast and then went in search of the Chancellor. I found him in his office looking bright-eyed and bushy tailed.

“Ben!” he said, looking up from some papers as I walked in. “You’re looking rested.”

“I am, at that. What needs doing?”

The Chancellor shuffled some papers around, and then pulled one out of a neat stack. He looked up apologetically. “We’re five short on the culinary staff, so I’ve put you on kitchen duty. Do you mind?”

“Not at all. Is Steel Ladle still Chef?”

“Oh, he is. He’ll be glad of a unicorn’s help, though. And,” added the Chancellor with a roguish expression, “I believe you know several of the mares on the serving staff?”

“Let me see, let me see,” I said, making a show of looking vague as I tapped my hooves together. “I just might remember one or two.”

Chancellor laughed a long, loud laugh. “To the kitchens with you!” he said, pointing with a hoof. I saluted, did an about face and marched out of his office.

The kitchen staff was delighted to have me and I enjoyed seeing some of them as well. I snuck a few kisses and nose rubs with several mares in the cellars and service passageways in between cleaning, chopping and arranging. I also talked to Chef in his own language, a language with wonderful, liquid vowel sounds. He was moved to tears a few times since he hadn’t spoken it with another pony since I’d left.

Before I knew it, it was two hours before the opening and I was putting on my mess dress. I’d had it tailored when I was with the Guard and it still fit perfectly; all that running with Applejack had paid off. I took the service passageways to the kitchen to meet one last time with the six mares I was nominally supervising. Only one had seen me in mess dress before so I enjoyed the wide eyes and “Ooooos!” of appreciation; nothing like a stallion in uniform, I tell you what.

I went back upstairs and made one last inspection of the spotless #2 Ballroom and #2 Parlor, then greeted Jenson as he and his squad, looking splendid in their formal uniforms, reported for duty. They had their assignments and I got Jenson and two of his squad for my rooms which with me made for two guards in each. I would float between rooms, mingle a little and answer any questions the guests had. The #2 rooms were usually far less busy than the #1 Ballroom and Receiving Room but some ponies liked the break from socializing.

At 7:30 the mares had the food out on the serving tables and at 7:45 Jenson, his squad and I took our places. At 8 exactly we heard the opening ceremony music and a few minutes later ponies started to pour into the palace. An hour or so later Chancellor looked in and waved a hoof when he saw all was going smoothly. My one bit of excitement was a lost filly, a very cute if tearful pegasus Jenson carried over to me. I used magic to flip her onto my back, then strutted around with her until we found her parents. By then she was giggling at getting to ride on a Royal Guard and had forgotten she was lost. I did get to meet the Defender of the Realm from the Griffon War, an older, scarred unicorn Sergeant Major in the mess dress of the regular Army. When he walked in, Jenson and I both came to attention and saluted. He returned the salute and greeted us gruffly, very glad to see some other soldiers.

The Gala ended at 11 and by 10:45 my rooms started to clear. The mares started to remove the now mostly empty platters and I stifled a yawn. The party had gone perfectly and I knew that would please the Chancellor.

Suddenly, I heard an enormous THUMP from the direction of the #1 Ballroom which caused the floor to vibrate. Next came a series of crashes, then a tremendous BOOM! After just a moment, I looked over at Jenson and both of us raced out of the #2 Ballroom. We galloped into the Main Hall and through a cloud of dust saw ponies running in panic. With Jenson behind me, I grabbed a stallion as he raced by.

“What is it?” I yelled over the screaming and shouts.

“I don’t know,” he said as he struggled to get away. “I think it’s an Earthquake!”

I let him go and Jenson and I ran into the thick of the choking dust. We could just see into the #1 Ballroom. The alicorn statue was smashed to bits and the four ornamental columns were all lying on the floor with three broken into several pieces. One of Jenson’s squad was lying unconscious as were other ponies, several bleeding. Another squad member was helping a third with a broken front leg limp to one of the French doors.

“Let’s clear this room, Sergeant!”

“Sir!”

Jenson waved to the other squad members and pointed to the six doors leading to the Hedge Maze. They nodded and opened three of them. The dust started to clear as ponies raced out the first exit they could get to. I started toward the downed ponies when I heard a sort of rumble from outside. I looked up and who should burst in through the Menagerie entrance but Fluttershy, one of the Mane Six and a fellow Ponyville resident.

"You're…going to LOVE ME!" she screamed as animals of all sorts poured past her into the ballroom.

What in the name of the Magic I thought, then didn’t have time to think any longer since I was too busy trying to herd animals of all sorts back outside. Princess Celestia had very light security on her animals since they had agreed to stay in her menagerie willingly; that of course meant they could leave whenever they wanted and if they panicked, there was no stopping them. I ended up using a magic barrier which turned the frantic animals around and back out the door.

That done, I looked around for the first time; the whole disaster only took a minute or so and about 10 minutes had passed since then. All twelve of the Guard on duty had managed to clear the ballroom and were administering first aid to the injured. I did a quick assessment and started toward an older mare with a nasty cut on her head. Just then, the Chancellor raced in with several more of the Royal Guard behind him.

“The Princess!! I can’t find the Princess!” he said, more flustered than I’d ever seen him.

When I’d polled Tia’s cutie mark, I learned far more than how to raise the Sun and Moon. I also learned a good many Most Secret spells which only she and a very select few magic users knew. One of them was a Pony Locator spell which could find anypony no matter where they were. I cast it and found Princess Celestia not too far from the palace.

“I’ve got her,” I told the Chancellor.

“Go check on her, would you?” said a worried Chancellor. “I’ll take over here.”

“On it,” I said and teleported to where I’d found the Princess.

I popped into place in a donut shop not too far from the palace. I found the Princess with a worse for wear Mane Six, laughing and talking as if nothing at all had happened. After I listened for just a few seconds, I could tell they were treating the disaster as some sort of silly prank.

That…annoyed me. Actually, it infuriated me. For the first time in this World, I grew truly angry. Powerful magic users are as disciplined as advanced martial artists and have all sorts of restrictions on their behavior, but even they can lose their tempers. When they do, they can level entire buildings. That was why some of the non-magic users still feared unicorns.

I took a step forward and Celestia noticed me.

“Ben!! How wonderful to see you! We were just talking about how the Gala is usually so dull…oh. Oh, dear.”

I didn’t know it at the time, but my eyes had changed color to a solid white while my mane crackled with electricity and formed a white halo around my head. Unlike other powerful magic users, instead of bursting into flame when angry, I apparently pushed heat away from me, so frost had spread out from my hooves to the counter, the windows and around the table where the Mane Six suddenly stopped talking like somepony had thrown a switch.

“Your Highness,” I managed to grate out past the block in my throat, breath steaming in the cold. “The Chancellor was worried and sent me to find you. I take it you are well?”

Princess Celestia actually swallowed hard. Rarity, Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, Applejack and Twilight’s familiar Spike were cowering against the wall and Fluttershy was under the table. Even Twilight looked afraid although she stood her ground; even furious, she knew I’d never hurt her. Applejack looked at me as if she’d never seen me before, her green eyes huge.

“Ah…yes, I’m fine. Just fine. Everything is…fine,” said Princess Celestia, Ruler of Equestria as she looked at me and then at the ground.

“Ben, it was an accident. Honest!” said Twilight. I looked at her and she cringed, ears flat to her skull, terrified at what she saw. That snapped me out of it and my fury left almost as soon as it came. I just felt tired and had that hollow feeling you get when someone you love disappoints you.

I stood at attention and gave my best parade ground salute even though I was covered in dust and grime. “Thank you, your Highness. I shall report to the Chancellor at once. Now if you’ll excuse me, I must tend to the wounded.”

Without waiting for Tia to dismiss me, I teleported with a CRACK of displaced air. Not many unicorns could teleport and it was only the most amateurish who made a loud noise when they did; I did it on purpose, though. I was back in the wrecked ballroom and found an anxious Chancellor waiting with a full squad in case he needed to rescue the Princess.

I raised a hoof. “She’s fine, Chancellor. She’s in that donut shop not too far from here with the Mane Six.”

“Thank Equestria for that!” said the Chancellor. “Does the Princess know what happened?”

I nodded wearily. “Do you remember when your daughter and several of her sorority sisters decided they were going to steal the Victory statue on Fountain Square?”

“What!?! Are you telling me all of this is some sort of…mischief? Some ponies almost died!!”

“I doubt if Herself or the Mane Six planned for it to go this far, but there it is.”

The Chancellor went from worried to grim in a heartbeat. “I see,” he said. He had three fillies of his own and knew they sometimes kicked up their hooves at the worst possible time. “Well, nothing for it. Would you please treat the wounded?”

I nodded and headed off to the makeshift infirmary. I healed the old mare’s head wound I’d noticed before and one of the Guard escorted her home. I also fixed three broken legs including one on this sweet filly who was one of my servers; she’d only started at the palace a few weeks ago. That enraged me all over again but I held it together this time. The rest were cracked ribs, scrapes, bumps and contusions and although it took it out of me, I healed all of them.

Ponies healed, I went back to helping clean up. I’d just pulled a beautiful blacksnake (which sent several of the mares screaming into the next room) out of the curtains and put him back into the Menagerie when Celestia walked in. Many think it’s all one way with the aristocracy, them giving the orders and servants obeying, but servants have their own way of showing anger or displeasure. One way is to work very slowly and another is to behave with absolutely perfect courtesy. A staff that loved their monarch the way the palace ponies loved Celestia showed it in a hundred different ways each day but make them angry or mistreat them and they become just a pair of well-trained hooves and nothing more.

I heard “Tench-hut” from across the room. I spun and braced, then as the ranking officer walked over and saluted. The other staff all bowed as if they were before the throne itself, in perfect unison and in a chilly silence. The only sounds were a pony sweeping up glass on the porch.

“Umm…as you were,” said Celestia. I stood next to the Chancellor as he coolly told the Princess about the wounded and the damage. Tia looked absolutely miserable but neither I nor the Chancellor gave her the slightest concession.

When the Chancellor had finished his report, Celestia said in a subdued voice. “It’s rather late, Chancellor. Perhaps you can start the clean-up tomorrow?”

“Yes, your Highness,” he said, giving a perfect bow and holding it. I saluted at the same time and held that as well. Both meant we were treating one of Tia’s suggestions as a Royal Command.

“Dismissed,” said the downcast Princess.

The Chancellor called out to the butler and underbutlers who dismissed the staff until morning. I waved a hoof at Jenson and the other guards and they vanished out the French doors to return to quarters. I was the last out into a service passage. As I shut the door, I looked back and saw Celestia staring at the floor, her expression bleak. I got back to my room, dumped my uniform down the cleaning chute and showered. I fell into bed but lay awake thinking of how Celestia looked, standing alone in the wrecked ballroom.

She loves you, said the Magic of Equestria.

No excuses, I answered.

You love her, too, said the Magic, but you must not stay.

Too tired to argue, I fell asleep.

The next morning I was up at Sunrise again and went straight to the #1 Ballroom. The Chancellor was there already with two of the underbutlers. Several of the staff had set up tables loaded with leftover food from last night. I ate several parsnips, carrots and mushrooms for my breakfast, then got with the Chancellor. He looked tired, I thought, but also determined.

“I’ve sent for help,” he said.

“How are the wounded?”

“Fine, thanks to you. The Duchess sent you a basket of oranges in thanks for healing her head wound.”

Duchess? Oh, by the Lord of Hel’s pointy ears, wouldn’t you know one of the aristocracy was caught in the fallout, I thought.

I didn’t have a chance to say anything else as almost the entire palace staff started to arrive. The underbutlers organized scrubbing the walls and ceiling while the Chancellor introduced me to two other unicorns he’d called earlier. One was an older mare who could meld and shape stone they way I could metal. I found it fascinating enough I polled her cutie mark (a slab of granite) to learn how to do it. It took far more effort than working with metal but when she’d finished, the broken columns were back together with only the smallest of seams. A pair of guards had to carry her home on a stretcher, though.

The other unicorn was a glazier and quickly replaced all the missing glass. All he needed was some white sand and he made the most beautiful glass I’d ever seen; I polled him as well. He also helped me raise those pillars which was a bit much for one unicorn. He, I and two squads of the guard lifted them back into place and this time anchored them to the floor with steel bolts which I made right there on the spot.

By noon we had the #1 Ballroom back in excellent shape including the repaired alicorn statue, new stone in the floor and a new set of doors to the Menagerie. We all took a break for a communal lunch which the serving ponies had set up in the #1 Parlor. It wasn’t exactly festive but the grim mood of last night was gone.

We were almost finished eating when Princess Celestia walked in flanked by two guards. A maid close to the door saw her first and called out, “Royalty is present. All rise!” We all stood, and the maid called out, “Bow!” We all bowed in perfect unison while the guards stood at attention. I bowed with the others since I was out of uniform and a civilian again.

Tia gave a small sigh which I guessed only one or two of us noticed, and then said, “Please, be seated.” The staff did but didn’t resume eating, just stared in absolute silence; you could hear the gardener’s shears clacking as he trimmed bushes.

“I want each of you to accept my apology for last night’s trouble,” Celestia said as she looked from pony to pony. “Know that it was an accident and the Mane Six and I certainly didn’t intend for anypony to get hurt. I take full responsibility and ask you to forgive me.” Tia made a half bow to the staff, then, a gesture usually reserved for visiting heads of state. That caused a murmur to run up and down the table.

The Chancellor as ranking pony rose. He made a full bow and said, “Your Highness, on behalf of the staff I accept your apology. We only ask to continue serving you and…ah, hopefully no more surprises.”

That caused some scattered laughter. The Princess rose with the Chancellor and said, “Agreed, Chancellor.” She nodded to all of us, her eyes meeting mine for just a few seconds, then turned and left. I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding, then made my way to the Chancellor.

“Nicely done,” I said.

“Mmmm, I’d only read about that protocol; I’ve never had to use it before today.”

“Do you need me for anything else?”

“No, if anypony could be said to have done his part, it’s you, Ben.” Chancellor shook my hoof. “I can’t thank you enough.”

I waved him off, and then said good-bye to my serving mares and a few others. The little filly I’d healed insisted on showing up for lunch and blushed after she gave me a kiss on the cheek. Others were more forward which I didn’t mind in the least. I also said good-bye to Jenson and the squad, then headed back to my room to pack. I didn’t have much and thought I could just make the 1:30 train. If I knew the engineer I hoped I could ride in the cab and we could have another quick trip.

I gave the room one last check, and then turned to leave. There in the doorway stood Princess Celestia. She could move very quietly when she wanted and she’d dispensed with the flanking guards. I put down my saddlebags and bowed.

“No need for that, Ben,” she said, coming in and closing the door.

I rose. “Your Highness, the staff and I certainly appreciate your…” and that was as far as I got.

Tia took my chin in her hoof, leaned forward and gave me a long, lingering kiss. She was taller, so she had to tilt my head up. Her lips were as soft as velvet, softer even than Sunny’s, and she had a distinct, bracing taste, like ground acorns, hay and a foggy Fall morning all rolled into one. Oh, it was wonderful and once I got over the surprise I returned it enthusiastically. I felt her tongue touch mine, too, something I’d taught Sunny.

Tia broke off first and, eyes still closed, slowly rubbed her muzzle along mine. “I love you, Benjamin Inventor,” she said, her mouth close to my left ear.

“I love you, Celestia Amalia Christina,” I answered, holding her head lightly with my left hoof and using her two Private Names.

“I know you do,” Tia said as she straightened and blew out a breath. With that, the moment was over but, by the Lord of Hel’s iron shod horn, it was worth it.

I took a deep breath myself. "How is Sunny?” I asked.

The princess lowered her eyes. "She misses you,” Celestia said, looking down at the wooden floor. "She misses you more than she thought it possible to miss anypony."

"Hmm. I know what she misses,” I said, sweeping a hoof over my body. "This is what she misses.”

Tia's head snapped up. She gave a startled giggle and blushed, her white ears and muzzle turning a fiery red. "She does not!"

"She does, I can tell it from here. After all, I'm irresistible. Or haven't you heard, your Highness?"

Still blushing, Tia laughed and punched me in the shoulder which was my intention. I’d realized some time ago that she’d never had the chance to be a filly and no stallion had ever joked or played with her even when she was younger. I was the first and it was a release she needed. We had it when she was Sunny, of course, and as I hoped some of that playfulness lingered.

“Tia,” I said, sobering a little. “Sunny knows what I know; that no matter what happens, she has someone who loves her more than he loves himself. That won’t change.”

“She knows it, too,” said Celestia, a faint sob in her voice. “She does, Ben.”

Eh, I thought, enough of that. “If you’ll forgive me, your Highness, I need to make the freight depot by 1:30.”

“Of course, Ben.”

We walked out into the hall together and shared one last, lingering glance. “I’ll come whenever you need me,” I said.

“Thank you, Servant of the Crown.”

I bowed, then waved a hoof and my Princess waved back. I took the service elevator to the kitchen, and then walked to the depot. Roundhouse was on duty and oiling the same 4-4-0.

“Got room for a deadhead?” I asked.

“You know it, Mr. Wizard,” he said, grinning and showing a few missing teeth. “We leave in 10.”

I had to admit, when I got back that afternoon I was glad to get home. I’d been back in Ponyville a couple of days when the Mane Six as a group stopped by and apologized for ruining the Gala, Celestia sanctioned or no. I forgave them, of course, but for the next few months still occasionally called Fluttershy “Psychoshy”, much to Fluttershy’s consternation.