FIRST! No to see how sappy this'll make me. [[MYBODYISNOTREADYMEME!]]

EDIT:...........I want a second chapter! Please?! Don't make me pull out the fluttercry!

Great story. Wait... so many views and already 7 likes? And still not submited? Interesting...

>>791516791516

Inception much?

Great story...I love it

I am in love with your story. My two favorite mares (not including octascratch) in a story!!!! Please make a second chapter!!!!

DerpyLuna? This is definitely a never done before. Must Read.

Good story

Interesting, but rushed.

To be honest, because of that fact, I'm kinda neutral about it.

+1000 points for Derpy being the main glad to see she get some princess action

MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Two complaints, both minor.

One: Another way to state the ending would be: "And they all lived happily ever after."

Two: You hinted at a sequel in a one-shot. Just as bad as hinting at a sequel, then openly stating you're not making one.

Doesn't change the fact that this is one good story. Keep up the good work!

"'Sister, how... how do I know if I love someone?' Luna asked nervously."

Someone should be somepony. =p And skipping one paragraph, there's the same mistake.

"'Come on Luna, don’t be such scared cat. Just relax and have a drink.' Luna smiled at Dinky's statement...'

It was Ditzy who said it. Dinky's asleep.

Sorry if this is taken as an insult, I was just trying to help.

But at any account, this is an awesome story, though the ending made me stop breathing for a few seconds... Please give us a second chapter...

Meh. Not bad, but it could have been better.

This story, I like it. ANOTHER!

>>791337791337>>793962793962>>794358794358>>794503794503>>794682794682

Wow guys, you really do want a sequel, don't you? Well, how about this?

We will let this fic breath a while on this site, see how many more requests we receive, and we will deliver you the sequel? Fair enough?

>>795125795125 Deal

Just a quick question, how does Luna instantly figure out Dinky has trouble with magic... It seemed as if some dialogue was missing... Could just be me, ignore if it is...

>>795139795139

Oh, thank you for telling us! Here, is this better?

"And miss Luna might help me with my little magic pwoblem too!" Dinky exclaimed. "She is a big pony. Like this big," the filly said as she was stretching her hooves as hard as she could, in the end falling on her back in the soft grass.

Still too adorable if you ask me. I'm worried about my blood sugar.

>>795125795125

im okay with that

>>795125795125

Very much enjoyable. Thank you. So long as I am not killed within the time between now, and the next chapter.

>>795125795125

Alright, I guess I can wait. I wanted more because I'm slowly going insane at the moment. Anyways, can't wait. It's a deal.

>>795125795125

I second this motion!

>>795125795125 I'm very excited for when the Sequel comes out.

i love this story please make Another chapter ill be your best friend times 20

please!!! make a sequel as fast a possible im sorry i just had to ask twice its that good of a story

>>796164796164

Activate friendship powa!

Adorable, surprising, and gave me ideas for my own stories.

Great work!

>>797600797600

Gave you ideas? Hmm, interesting. Glad to help you!

Im proud

-------------------

Justicia será el mío!

Lunar Justice

That was a brilliantly written story and has left me wanting more, I would love to see how others take to there friendship and also would love to see luna find and pound the living sht out of ditzy rapist

loved this. besides the rushed feel and a few grammer issues, it was AWSOME!

if you do make more i will gladly read them, Lunaderp is one of my favorite derpy pairings, but behind derpyshy.

Hope you make more

this story is 101% better sequel sound great to see what happens with ditzy and luna

>>799049799049

We know that Luna x Ditzy isn't really used, but we thought that it would make sense. Also, they are very much alike.

Horribly, terribly sweet. And in need of grammar assistance, as was already mentioned.

>>794389794389>>799049799049>>800736800736

Ok, we admit it. How about this? What if you'd help us with these grammar issues from the sequel?

>>800766800766

Actually, what I pointed out were just personal pet peeves of mine...

I wouldn't be much help anyways. Too lazy.

FUCK why did this have to end?

>>800766800766

That would be AWSOME!!!

im probably not that good, but i'd love to help! still a newbie author, but sure!

also YEAH FOR SEQUALS!

>>800815800815

Aydn here. Honestly, this is the second fic I ever wrote. In my opinion, newbie writers are the best. They aren't perfectionist.

>>800838800838

lol thanks, i think....

anyways, just let me now when you need me and i'll galdly look it over, O umm if you dont mind, could you help me with my stories a bit, sorry

>>802555802555 Contact Aydn Duncan. He might be willing to help.

>>802570802570

AWSOME THANK YOU

sorry, lol

I personally thought this story was ok.

I like the idea but I just couldn't get into the story. I had a hard time getting through the dialogue, as quite a bit of it seemed forced or unneeded.

>>802855802855

Aydn here. At least I know that this is my second fic I ever wrote. We are really working on constant improvement. But thank you for your opinion

although I absolutely adore Dinky it pisses me off a little to think that Ditsy was raped at least thats what I think you implied and I can't help but think that we might know who this stallion is considering that he is probably a unicorn as well as a grade A a-hole,

>>803250803250 I can tell you this. Life isn't fair

Oh I loved this! So sweet

Good job man!

This is good, but I think it'd be better if you got a proof reader. Some of the sentences are kinda awkward.  In any case, have some mustaches.

Loved the story!!!!

NEED MORE!!!! ...

Childish. Badly written. Painful to read.