8. (Threats of) Violence Solves Everything
The front gate of Canterlot was, by night, guarded by a pair of Luna’s personal soldiers, the Night Guard. At present, those two guards consisted of a pair of pegasus stallions, their coats blackened, the eyes yellow and slit like a dragon’s, their ears tufted and sharp, their wings transformed to resemble those of a bat, and their teeth sharpened. This was not their normal appearance, but the armor they wore, imbued by the magic of Luna herself, transformed them, granting them extra speed, strength, and endurance. The goal was one of intimidation – to be so physically imposing that the mere sight of them would be enough to end any fight before it began, or stop one that was in progress.
But for crimes that took place on the grounds of Canterlot Castle itself, or else involved one of its residents, the Royal Guard of Canterlot did not normally involve themselves in normal municipal policing duties, leaving that in the capable hooves of Canterlot’s normal police force. Of course, they did make exceptions if they saw a crime in progress – they would hardly just stand aside and watch if a pony was in danger.
Such as, for example, a blue unicorn, panting and struggling and in all ways looking exhausted and haggard and at the end of her rope, was seen charging (or, really, trudging, as she seemed too exhausted to run) towards the gates of Canterlot, being followed at a steady, relentless pace by a cream-colored earth pony who’s intentions towards the unicorn could not have been more obvious had she been singing about it.
The two pegasi looked to each other, before one, in silent agreement, stepped forward as the unicorn approached. “Ma’am, are you in need of assistance?” he asked.
The unicorn opened her mouth to answer, but all she could do was suck in breath. “No…fine…just…ha…gimme…second…”
The other Night Guard stepped forward as well, head tilting to the side a little as he regarded the disheveled unicorn. “Miss Lulamoon?” he asked.
Trixie looked to him, glaring for a moment, before deciding that, for once, she didn’t care. “Yeah,” she said, as her horn glowed, sputtered, then glowed again, a cantrip dancing from it as she cast the spell, thankfully a simple one, that would allow her to see past the transformation caused by Luna’s boon and regard the pegasus ponies beneath it and, more importantly, the invisible-to-the-naked-eye nameplates on their unifroms. “Um…officers Moonlight Smiles and Frolicsome Meadowlark. I’d like to go in, please. One guest.”
At the moment, Trixie was too exhausted from running from Bon Bon while magically running on empty to note the vast incongruity between their names and their chosen professions. The two pegasi considered Trixie, and Bon Bon as the earth pony finally stopped in her advance, directly behind Trixie, and continued to glare at her. Lyra was standing right beside her, stilled bedecked in Trixie’s warming cape and invisibility-bestowing hat, clutching her lyre tightly. Unlike Trixie’s earlier invisibility spells, the enchantment she had woven into her hat was rendering the lyre invisible.
The two pegasi Night Guards looked to each other, before looking back to Trixie. “ID, please,” Moonlight Smiles requested.
Trixie froze, as she felt Bon Bon’s eyes boring into her. “Um…” she said. “ID? Come on, officers, you recognize me, I’m Luna’s student…”
“Procedure is procedure,” Frolicsome Meadowlark responded.
“I’ve never needed it before.”
The stoic façade of the two Night Guards broke at that, as each offered thin, but toothy, grins. “That was when you lived here, ma’am,” Moonlight said. “But visitors are required to have some form of ID, as I’m sure you well know.”
Trixie blinked rapidly at that. “Oh, come on!” she exclaimed. “You know who I am!”
“Yes,” Moonlight confirmed. It dawned on Trixie that it was precisely because they knew who she was that they were doing this to her. “Where’s your hat and cape?”
Trixie resisted the urge to look at Lyra. “Occupied,” she said.
“Probably lost them,” Frolicsome said, before looking slightly sympathetic. “I know what that’s like. Lost my helmet recent in a flood.”
Trixie grimaced at that. She had a strong suspicion she knew exactly where this was going, why the guards were giving her a hard time.
“I suppose we could test her, somehow.” Moonlight added, looking to his companion.
“Got something in mind?” Frolicsome asked.
“Not really. Shame she melted the entire ice palace, otherwise we could just – ”
“Oh, ha ha ha,” Trixie interrupted. “Look, can we please just skip the part where you give me a hard time? We all know that you’re going to let me through because if you don’t, I’ll tell Luna!”
The two guards’ expressions did not change as they once again regarded each other. “Sure sounds like Trixie,” Frolicsome noted. “But it’s difficult to tell because there’s still water in my ears.”
“From the ice palace melting? Same here.”
“I think she threatened us a little.”
“I think so too. But I’m pretty sure that the Princess won’t reprimand us for not letting a pony through that didn’t have a proper form of ID. That sound about right?”
“It does. No matter how much we recognized the pony in question, we can’t let personal feelings get in the way of duty, after all.”
“Trixie…” Bon Bon hissed, sliding up next to the unicorn and ‘gently’ putting a hoof over her shoulder. Trixie seized up at the touch. “You said that this wouldn’t be a problem.”
“Ha…” Trixie breathed, looking intently at the two Night Guards, who had turned around and trotted back to their posts. “S-seriously, guys, she’s going to kill me.”
“That would be unfortunate,” Frolicsome noted.
“But funny,” Moonlight added. “However, we would stop her if she tried.”
“Eventually.”
“So don’t worry.”
Trixie glared at the two of them. She shrugged off Bon Bon’s foreleg, stepping forward as she looked between the two guards intently, muscles tensed as though she expected to have to leap into action at any second. “I’m Trixie Lulamoon,” she said. “Representative of the Night Court of Luna to Ponyville. The personal protégé of the Princess Luna herself. Element of Magic. Savior of the entire world from the fires of Corona, the Tyrant Sun. Let. Me. Through!”
There was a pause.
“Sorry,” Moonlight said, shaking his head slightly and tapping it with a hoof. “Still a little waterlogged. Could you repeat that?”
“This is an emergency!”
The two Night Guards looked once more to each other, their grins dropping somewhat. With a long-suffering sigh of the knowledge that they couldn’t just outright ignore that kind of proclamation, they looked back to Trixie. “What kind of emergency?” Frolicsome asked.
Trixie paused at that, biting her lip. She hadn’t meant to exclaim that, but then she was not at her best at the moment. “Personal,” she said. “Not…well, not really for me. A friend of mine. Magical accident. That’s all the detail I can go into.”
The two once more looked at each other. “We’re going to need more detail than that.”
Trixie blinked, looking behind her, at Bon Bon and Lyra. The earth pony still looked like she was on the verge of an equicidal rampage, while the latter was looking on with deep concern and mounting annoyance. “Um,” Trixie stated. “I can tell you that it was brought about by a mistranslated zebra spellbook. And that I need to get access to the Royal Library.”
“Sorry, that doesn't really sound like much of an emergency.” Moonlight stated. “And it must not be too great a problem since you’ve been wasting all this time with us.”
“Why don’t you just run on back to Ponyville and get proper ID. Then we can move forward from there,” Frolicsome finished.
Trixie glanced between them “But – ”
“No.”
“I just – ”
“Rules are rules.”
“If you don’t, I’ll – ”
“Please,” Moonlight said, wings raising a little in threat, “finish that sentence.”
“Discord’s mismatched horns!” Lyra exclaimed, drawing a look of ire from Trixie and Bon Bon both – at least until the two saw that she had taken off Trixie’s hat, rendering her visible. The guards’ reaction was instant, wings – sheathed in sharp blades – spread wide and ducking down into combat postures at the sight of something suddenly becoming visible, followed by whickers of surprise when they saw what had appeared from nothingness.
“Lyra…!” Bon Bon hissed, looking around. Fortunately, the streets of Canterlot were almost entirely empty in front of Canterlot’s gates. What few ponies there were dropped what they were holding and bolted in fright.
Lyra, meanwhile, stomped up to the two guards. “Look. I have had the worst day of my life just now! I’ve been covered in freezing paint, transformed into a big hairless bear, had to deal with Trixie’s insecurities and panicking and Bon Bon’s equicidal side, which by the way,” Lyra turned around to look at Bon Bon, “is a major problem and you’re going to have to get anger management,” she turned back to the two guards, “and all of this was on what was supposed to be a huge career day for me since it was my first solo show but no, I had to spend the whole day panicking instead of practicing and, yeah, the show turned out great, but that was in spite of everything! Right now, all I want to do is get back to normal and go to sleep! So! If you don’t let me and Trixie and Bon Bon through right now so that we can find some way to turn me back into a pony, I swear I am going to put the sharp pointy teeth in my mouth right now to good use! I will – Trixie get off of me!”
Trixie had positioned herself in front of Lyra, front hooves pressed to Lyra’s shoulders as her hind hooves worked to try and push Lyra backwards. “Lyra?” she asked. “Put my hat back on.”
“But – ”
“Now, Lyra.”
The once (and hopefully, future) unicorn mare glared at Trixie before doing so. To Trixie’s eyes, there was a slight blue shimmer across her body, while to everypony else, she would be rendered invisible once more. Once that had been accomplished, she turned back to the guards, who, no longer having Lyra to stare at, now turned their aggressive posturing on Trixie.
“So,” she said. “Magical accident. Angry, invisible bear. Can I go in now, please?”
---
“Ow,” Lyra’s voice said as the three of them walked through Canterlot Castle, towards the Royal Library. Bon Bon had apparently found her despite her being invisible, and had started hitting her with one hoof. “Ow – ow – Bon Bon, stop it, this is – ow!”
“Stupid – invisible for a reason – ”
“Thank-you, Bon Bon,” Trixie said.
“I’m still mad at you too!”
“It got us in, right?” Lyra demanded as she skipped away from Bon Bon. The earth pony, however, heard her hoof-steps – foot-steps – whatever – on the tiled floor of the castle and continued to chase after her. A earth pony courtier, who had been walking through the halls, stopped and stared at the display “Trixie was failing – ”
“I was not failing – ”
“You were too failing – ”
“Magical accident, invisible naked talking stupid bear,” Trixie informed the courtier as the three of them passed on by, before looking behind her at Lyra and Bon Bon “and this defeats the purpose of turning you invisible as well!” she looked to the courtier. “What’s your name?”
“M…Meadow Song,” he said, raising an eyebrow as he watched Bon Bon chase nothing, and that nothing talked back to her.
“Meadow Song. What is the point of an invisibility spell?”
“Um,” he said. “To…not be seen?”
“Good! Now if you were turned invisible, wouldn’t it also make sense to not talk?”
“I guess – ”
“And if a friend of yours is invisible for a very good reason, shouldn’t you refrain from talking or hitting – ” Trixie began, when she was thwacked upside the head by Lyra. To Meadow Song, it just looked like she stumbled forward, mane tossed around for no reason.
“I’m under a lot of stress!” Lyra exclaimed.
Trixie turned around, glaring at Lyra. “Oh, it is on,” she exclaimed, lunging.
“Don’t you dare put a hoof on my marefriend – ” Bon Bon exclaimed, reaching Trixie first and lunging, her teeth clamping down on Trixie’s tail. The unicorn let out a yelp as her forward speed was suddenly stopped and she landed unceremoniously on the floor. She rolled over in time to avoid Bon Bon’s descending hooves.
“Meadow Song!” Trixie cried. “Help!”
“He ran away,” Lyra noted, pulling Trixie away from another attempted hoof-stomp from Bon Bon, though she began running when Trixie got her hooves under her and charged at her, horn down. “And I’m not stupid! I’m not the one who forgot the spellbook!”
“Yes! Yes you are! You totally are!” Trixie exclaimed as she chased Lyra, the two longer hind legs of the transformed unicorn giving her a slight speed advantage over the shorter, and more importantly exhausted, four legs of Trixie. “I can’t be expected to maintain six illusions on me plus five more on my cape plus weave one into my hat and try to keep you from slitting your frogs in despair and remember the spellbook! All you had to do was practice your special talen – ow! Bon Bon! You’re supposed to be mad at Lyra right now!”
“Maybe, but I can’t see Lyra!” Bon Bon exclaimed, hitting Trixie a few more times for good measure. She was easily keeping pace with Trixie, but couldn’t put much power behind her swings while also running at the same time.
“She’s right in front of my horn! Just give me a moment to gore her, you can follow the blood leaking everywhere then!”
“For the Love of Luna, this is a library!” A fourth voice shouted.
The three mares – well, two mares, and a female of some variety – stopped, and looked around. Somehow, without noticing, they had ended up in the library of Canterlot. Surrounding them on all sides were rows upon rows of bookcases taking up the circular room of the castle, ascending three stories upwards. The library’s walls and shelves were a mixture of blue and red, while its eastern wall simply didn’t exist, instead housing a vast window that overlooked the city of Canterlot. The entire place was lit by expensive glow-gems rather than candles, bathing the room in soft, warm light.
While Canterlot Castle never truly went to sleep, especially seeing as the government of Equestria, the Night Court, convened and operated at night like its ruling Princess, parts of the castle did tend to have ‘off’ hours. The library was one of them; at this time of night, the only occupants, other than Trixie, Lyra, and Bon Bon, were a trio of ponies, all of them unicorns, two stallions and a mare, each of them quite incensed looking. They were all various subdued colors, and all had cutie marks related to books and scrolls. The one who had shouted was a severe-looking stallion, tall and thin, wearing thin glasses and with a short-cropped mane and tail.
“Star’s sake!” the stallion exclaimed. “You are a pair of grown mares gallivanting through the castle like it’s a playground! I and my colleagues are in the middle of vital research into zebras for the Princess, and we will not stand for this interruption! I’m going to have to demand you leave the library, at once, or I will call the guard!”
Trixie looked at Bon Bon, then to Lyra. “Research into zebras?” she asked.
“Yes!” the stallion continued. “It is vital for the security of…in order to secure the safety of…why are you looking at me like that?”
---
Trixie wasn’t entirely certain how the three of them had done it – it probably helped that Lyra was invisible, and so could hurl things at the three other unicorns to break their concentration while they were casting spells – but somehow, working together, the three of them had managed to overpower and tie up the scholars, using curtains torn down from the large widow to wrap them all up and lie them on their sides with their hooves all tied together. By the end of it, Lyra was panting, Bon Bon was panting, and Trixie felt like she was on the verge of passing out.
“You’re going to die,” Bon Bon stated, starting forward. The mare of the other group let out a panicked yelp at that. Bon Bon’s advance was stopped only when Lyra grabbed a hold of her marefriend’s tail and dug the balls of her strange feet into the floor.
“No,” Lyra ordered. “No. We need them alive.”
“Probably not all of them!”
“I am uncomfortable with the direction of this conversation,” one of the stallions commented.
“Just the conversation?” The other stallion of the group demanded.
“Shut up,” Trixie ordered, sitting down in front of the three of them. “Alright. What are your names?”
“Regal Tome,” answered the first stallion, the one who had spoken originally. He nodded to his comrades. “My companions are Vast Volumes and Glitter Scrolls.”
Trixie looked to the other stallion. “I hope you gave your parents a lot of pain for naming you Vast Volumes,” she said.
“I’m Glitter Scrolls,” he answered, then nodded towards the mare of the group. “She’s Vast Volumes.”
Trixie blinked a few times. “Okay,” she said. “Well, that would lead to a fascinating conversation on any other night. Tonight? I don’t care, and neither does Lyra, and Bon Bon isn’t right in the head so we can’t trust what she thinks anyway.”
“Keep digging, Trixie, keep digging,” Bon Bon insisted.
“I will, thank-you. Now, you said that you were doing research into zebras. Did that, perchance, including translating a certain zebra spellbook for Princess Luna? A spellbook that she intended to give to her student, the Element of Magic, the savior of Equestria, and probably somepony you should properly translate for?”
“Yes,” Regal Tome responded, after taking a moment to realize that Trixie was, in fact, Luna’s student. “Well…it was more of a team effort.”
“Oh yes, Regal, throw us under the stampede…” Vast Volumes requested, rolling her eyes, before looking at Trixie. “He translated the spell descriptions. Glitter was the one who translated the spell ingredients and steps, while I singled out the zebra magic words – they were originally mixed in quite a jumble with each spell – and matched them up with Glitter’s spell steps. Then Glitter matched up the spell descriptions with what Regal translated.”
Trixie looked to Lyra and Bon Bon, both of whom were staring at the three captives in stunned silence and disbelief. “That…” Lyra said. “That…that is the most inefficient, accident-prone system imaginable!”
The three glared at her, or where they thought she was, anyway. “As near as I know,” Glitter Scrolls said, “we three are the only ponies in all of Equestria who are fluent in Zebra.”
“And Princess Luna,” Regal Tome added, looking behind him at the table they had been sitting at, which was covered in books, papers, ink wells, and quills, “Gave us a considerable workload!”
“How would you have dealt with it?” Vast Volumes demanded.
“I’d have split one book into three parts and had each of you translate a third, that’s how!” Lyra demanded. “No wonder the spells are mislabeled! Hey, is there a fourth one of you idiots who deals with punctuation? A fifth one for translating capital letters?”
“Zebra doesn’t use punctuation,” Regal Tome said, eyes half-lidded. “Nor does it distinguish between capital and lower-case letters.”
“Whatever the problem was,” Vast Volumes added, “I doubt it was that bad.”
Lyra took off Trixie’s hat.
The three translators of Zebra to Equestrian screamed.
Then they stopped for breath.
Then they screamed some more.
But Trixie, though it had taken immense effort given how magically exhausted she was, had put a silencing enchantment over the doors of the library – so nopony outside heard them. The blue unicorn, cream earth pony, and naked bear drank in the sounds of their screams of terror like it was a fine wine. “Right,” Trixie said, when the three had finally run their throats ragged. “So. Lyra is a…this thing now…because a group effort towards failure on your part. This entire day has been a lesson in group failure for me. It has not been fun for anypony.”
“Not. At. All,” Lyra insisted.
“Please don’t eat us,” Regal Tome begged.
“We’re going to untie you,” Lyra stated. “You are going to go over to that nice pile of zebra books and find the original copy of the spellbook. Trixie is going to tell you the magic words and you’re going to find out what I turned into, and then find the counter-spell. And I make no promises about not eating one of you because I am getting hungry again.”
Trixie’s horn glowed, and the bonds around the three unicorns loosened. They swiftly extricated themselves from their bonds and dashed over to the library tables, getting to work on finding what the angry naked bear wanted before she put her mouth of sharp, meat-piercing teeth to work on one of them.
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This chapter...
This chapter was fun.
.........my frickin god. That is a HORRIBLE way to do a translation, and I hope the lot of tem ge Fired for even thinking that was the way to do it! I'm actually legitimately angry at the, for this mess. Frick.
And it's even worse because I know that's an idea a bunch of idiot scholars would come up with to save time, NOT caring at all aout accuracy of work, and instead worrying about finishing a product so they can show off how good they are..........
...........frickin' A, I need a drink....
Wow just wow. Those ponies are idiots no wonder the book if screwed up. Somepony better get a good talking to after this, or at least a reprimand. Oh so, Lyra's been a naked chick this whole time right? Well ponies don't wear clothes so guess they don't mind.
That was an incredible amount of incompetency shown.
But hell, anything that leads to Psycho Bon Bon related hilarity is worth it.
I admit, this was a lot of fun to read. And I REALLY want to figure out what exactly happened at the Ice Palace. Drunk Trixie performed a firework spell?
1023889 Would you like a soda or something alcoholic?
1024199
Yes.
1024204 *hands you a rum and Coke* Enjoy.
I'm glad it updated before I went to my Dad's this weekend.
I keep wondering how stories this awesome could have any downvotes at all...
Oh that was fun.
I just got home from a long, exhausting, somewhat rotten, but ultimately rewarding (though not in the way I'd intended) mourning of shopping. All I wanted to do was take a cool show and then collapse into my bed. Just for the hell of it though I figured, couldn't hurt to check FimFic.
Foolishly famous last words if ever there were any, because should I find but an update to this story. Spent and tired as I was there was just no way I was going to wait to read this, and you did not disappoint. This chapter was basically one long sequence of delightful comedy gags. I lacked the energy to actually laugh at any of it, but the sheer joy managed to revitalize me somewhat, though I still might lapse into a temporary coma within the next hour or so.
One point of mild contention. While it was quite karmicly satisfying, I'm not sure it was really appropriate or necessary to assault and tie-up the translation team.
1023889
Yeah, that looks like a very college student, lazy-arse, assembly line way of doing things. It's certainly how I would've done it.
i34.photobucket.com/albums/d120/clavdivs/spiderjerusalem-goddammit.jpg
Holy Christ this chapter had me HOWLING.
"Somehow, without noticing, they had ended up in the library of Canterlot without noticing." redundantcy is redundant.
1023824
Trixie, Lyra, and Bon Bon about one "nyuk-yuk-yuk" from becoming the Pony Three Stooges there at the gates.
And the collective screaming pausing for breath, and restarting in unison? One of my favourite gags.
So,have the L!Bronies started a Lyra-Bear meme yet?
This has been a terrible experience for Lyra all around. She gets turned into something she doesn't know, she nearly misses the most important recital of her life, and she finds out that her marefriend gets equicidial sometimes.
It's also hilarious, but I think that's cold comfort to her now.
Three stallions and a mare is one too many to be a 'trio'. It's either a quartet or there are only two stallions.
Edit:
After reading the rest of the chapter, I'm pretty sure you meant to say that there were three unicorns rather than four. Two stallions and a mare.
Your story repeats it'self at the part where the three unicorns get to work to translating for the angry naked bear.
1023824 And it was fun to read, too.
1024368>>1023889 Agreed
1024313 Perhaps not, but I think Trixie, Lyra, and Bon-Bon are well beyond caring what's appropriate or necessary.
HAW! Slapstick comedy is best comedy.
1024211
Hey, got any more of those? Or maybe tequila?
scranton.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw1545-partE_1.png
1024901 Bottle or glass?
1024904
i.qkme.me/355hy6.jpg
1024912 *hands over glass of rum and Coke along with bottle of tequila* Try not to puke your organs out.
And if you can't manage that, don't you DARE get any on me.
1024916
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1023824
Seconded!
I love the "angry invisible naked bear" thing.....
Actually, the next time someone asks me what species I am, I might just answer with "naked bear" dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Trixie_lolface_2.png
Trixie needs to do something to those guards, just to remind them it's not wise to piss off the Great and Powerful. With or without naked bears.
>>AlgaeNymph
>> Blackbelt
"Yeah, that looks like a very college student, lazy-arse, assembly line way of doing things. It's certainly how I would've done it."
See I was thinking either someone who can get away with sub-standard work, (bureaucrat, or someone with tenure) or just lazy kids. Eitiher way, we have to revisit Trixie's ideas on how they should be 'fired'.
awesome story, although I am kind of hoping Trixie lays into Bon-Bon for her equicidial habits. I mean, she can't really solve problems if she's getting attacked all the time.
But awesome story is awesome and gets
out of 
By Nightmare Moon, that was HILARIOUS
. 
. "Is it at all possible for this day to get any worse for our 'heroes'?!"
Oh god, those IDIOTS. By which I mean [almost] EVERYONE. First the Lunar Guards, dicking around in the face of an emergency (Luna needs better guards dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Luna_lolface.png ). Then Lyra completely forgetting the point of invisibility AGAIN dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra.png . And lastly, the obvious IMBECILIC SCRIBES (or whatever their job title is)
1023824 I can tell. I think that's the best way to write though, because then you can make stuff like this
1025058 INDEED! NAKED BEARS ALL 'ROUND! ...That probably sounded better in my head...
1024941
Like the spell-book, this can only end badly.
May I just say BAAAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAAAAA!! Oh lord it is TOO good that they would run across the original translation team. This whole chapter was just fricken GOLDEN. Poor Lyra and her terrible, horrible, no-good very bad day. Hopefully she'll regain her body (and thus also Bon Bon's sanity) soon. XD
Moonlight Smiles and Frolicsome Meadowlark?
Oh you sly devil, you!
1025483
scranton.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw5422-fluttershy_please.jpg
1025682 That is... rather disturbing...
1025723
Better?
1026486
1024202 Originally, there were four unicorns. I cut the number down, but I was in a rush so I guess I didn't do the best job of editing.
1024313 It was neither appropriate nor necessary. It was funny, though.
1024528 Bear Lyra and Bare Lyra, most likely. Neither of them happy.
1025293 1025483 Actually I think the guards act pretty well here. They aren't letting Trixie in without ID, and while they may be giving her a hard time in the process, that's really the correct thing to do except in a dire emergency. Trixie really wasn't getting the emergency point across without Lyra, and note that after Lyra shows off how serious the situation is, they do, apparently, let Trixie and crew in.
1025631 I'm actually kind of sad that the circumstances of the setting forced me to change Sunshine Smiles' name to Moonlight Smiles. The origin of his name is adorable
1026932 I guess you're right, even though it IS more fun to simply label them as idiots. Oh well. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Luna_apple.png
The point still stands for the others though
>>RainbowDoubleDash
>> yayme >> HiveLordLusa Actually I think the guards act pretty well here. They aren't letting Trixie in without ID, and while they may be giving her a hard time in the process, that's really the correct thing to do except in a dire emergency. Trixie really wasn't getting the emergency point across without Lyra, and note that after Lyra shows off how serious the situation is, they do, apparently, let Trixie and crew in.
Well yeh, they did follow procedure, but they also took the time to mess with her. Just because the Ice Palace wasn't Trixie proof. They're lucky Bon-Bon didn't turn on them.
Did they let them in? Or did the run like hell? Either way, I'd like to see the shift report on that one...
1027330
I'd like to think that, apart from initial surprise, Luna's personal Night Guards aren't going to break and run at the sight of a single human woman.
>>RainbowDoubleDash
I'd like to think that, apart from initial surprise, Luna's personal Night Guards aren't going to break and run at the sight of a single human woman.
I'm sure they wouldn't, but I still like the idea of them explaining getting chased by a naked bear.
twp stallions and a mare
I’d of split one book into three parts
1. Two.
2. I'd have split... I think...
But WOW did those 'scholars' ever mess up big time... any sane person would definitely get mad at them...
BAHAHAHA, oh God, my sides. I couldn't have imagined that they'd find the scholars responsible. This was a very funny chapter.
Best...chapter...yet!!!
Oh man the hilarity
Well in regards to firing them the castle has siege weoponry right?
Oh, OH that team! I hope they get fired, seriously. That's just pathetic on their part.
Also, I wanna kick the guards. Hard. With steel-toed boots in their flanks. Flippant much?
Oh my God. That chapter is one of the most beautiful things I've seen in ever.
Royal guards wear two froms at all times ever since 749 years ago when the froms of all the guards pulling Luna's carriage failed at the same time, causing the founding of Manehattan.
I see what you did there. And the other thing you did there. And then there's no more things there that I see.
Want to hear me argue with myself about why I'm even giving myself the impression I'm drunk? Of course not, what do I know about drunkenness? Trust me, whatever you're imagining is more amusing.
Recently.
Also, I lost my wife too. Her name wasn't Helmet, though, and it wasn't in a flood, but I know how you feel.
Seriously, though, who names their daughter Helmet?
Can somebody tell me why I just checked, and I wince more strongly when I think that phrase than when I change it back to "wrist"? It seriously hurts more to imagine the one you wrote.
I don't have frogs that I just never noticed before, right? That'd be pretty weird.
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee karma.
I can't stop anymore. Goodnight, L.A.
1023824 I can see why.
"Just give me a moment to gore her, you can follow the blood leaking everywhere then!"
(It feels weird to use a mane6 smilie in this series)
Before even reading, I must say I nearly ROFLed just reading the title, and knowing what( or rather, who) it implies.