King of Gae Parabolae, Prince Fraternal Of Pudding, Knight of the Most Noble and Ancient Order Of St. George, Snuzzlepal, Feezy Squeeze Lover
Someone has written a play about the Element's defeat of Corona. And the Elements are going to see it. Surely it will be a paragon of accuracy and storytelling, right? Right?
A canon story of the Lunaverse. Rating for lots of very sloppy makeouts.
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Looks like fun.
I smell wacky, time-wasting nonsense.
Well, that'll be an interesting one. It's been a while since I've read any stories in this setting. This can only be really funny or really cringe-worthy. Given the rating, I'm currently leaning towards the former.
As an aside, I'd appreciate if you could space the formatting out a bit more. You know, an empty line between paragraphs and such. It's still plenty readable, but right now it feels very condensed. A bit more spacing would loosen it up a little and help it feel a less wall-of-text-y.
Also, it's spelled "embarrassment."
Oh, the irony. Rarity imagining herself as a bearer. I should think that the Mane Six are just another state secret.
Note that according to the rules when they got their title it should be adressed 'Dame Ditzy' and not 'Dame Doo'
That aside... time for Trixie to break out Cards Against Equinity! Though I doubt she would take well to the sex jokes...
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Thanks for the correction.
Great. Super. It's the Ember Island Players meet the "Thou Hast Smoked It" thing from Harvey Birdman.
I do sure hope that Double Dash has a good dental insurance. Between Raindrops and Bonbon I don't know whom wrath will be worse.
Well that didn't take long to go wrong...
I'll admit I read "Longest Night, Longest Day" 4 years ago, but this does seem to be pretty accurate. I thought Carrot Top's laser vision was green though?
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That salad dressing recipe is real, BTW. I've had it, and it really does taste ridiculously good.
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You know I think I know whom Double Dash is. Is it by any chance Rainbow Dash? Because we know that main 6 Dash writes novels.
Two initials and a word: A. K. Yearling.
There's some weird pronoun shenanigans happening when discussing Double Dash and Stormy Squall as well. Does anyone even know if Double Dash is a mare or a stallion? And Written Script, what's this 'we' thing all about?
Also, as established by RDD, you adress a Dame with her first name, not her family name, so it would be Dame Carrot... or maybe Dame Carrot Top seeing as it's her chosen way of being adressed.
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I was actually wondering if anypony would notice that. No, the Elements don't know what gender Double Dash is, so they're each subconsciously assuming Double Dash is the same gender they are.
And Written Script is a playwright.
I wonder how they will portray Spike and Zecora? I'll wager they will make the dragon a giant instead a of baby dragon. XD
Oh, boy. Parodying the people who think the L!Mane Six are antagonists, are we?
I'm beginning to wonder if it is Luna that wrote this play. That speech to Corona, who else could have it written like that?
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Oh, I'm waiting for the giant Raindrops vs monstrous Spike fight in the style of Godzilla or power rangers.
Wait, Raindrops is a guy in the play?
Apparently. Also,
This is gold. Pure gold.
7414264 I doubt it. She likes Raindrops, I think, and she would have had Stage Luna read Stage Trixie the riot act. Also, I believe that she knows about Bon Bon and Lyra, or at the very least knows that TrixiexLyra would never happen.
1) There's a bit of a formatting error.
2) Nice riff on Rainbow Rocks.
Hmm. I wonder what someone else
will think of it down the line.
Well this fic was a barrel of laughs. Now I just hope this story will be considered cannon. Because this kind of funny weirdness could work in almost any universe.
Right, I shall have this canonized, then, since I don't see anything troubling about it.
Any particular thoughts on when you want it placed within Season 2?
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I was thinking late Autumn, between the comedic tone and the fact that it's essentially a (messed-up) recap episode for the Season 1 premier. Could also work in Winter, with the hints of Corona's presence.
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I'll put it in Winter, then.
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Who's thinking this? It doesn't make sense in context of the above lines. Where Trixie is aware that Lyra is right next to her.
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Because Ditzy is best pony. Other than Octavia.
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Deciding if that's crazy awesome how they do Raindrops, or terrifyingly funny.
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All my yesses!!!!
Top.
Her name is Carrot Top. Not Carrot Toppington (now if this was in the play itself. That'd be a different bushel of carrots since they seem pleased to make a farce out of everything the Bearers are / do. But Toppington isn't part of her name.).
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Ha. I didn't know that Knights were addressed by first names. That's pretty cool. But I doubt that Carrot Top has a family name (Since her Grandma's name is Sprout, and the name of the family farm is 'Golden Harvest'. So she's probably one of the many ponies that don't have family names.).
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Yep Raindrops is a guy in the play.
You have a formatting error where Fluttershy talks to Ditzy Doo.
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All-in-all, not a bad story. And was pretty funny in a lot of places. Although a part of me wants them to find out who Double Dash is, just to see what they'd do.
7943567 We've actually toyed with Carrot Top actually being a sort of shortened name, like how Pinkie's full name is Pinkamina Diane Pie. Toppington is what's the more generally aggreed family name. Grandma Sprout was on her mother's side of the family...possibly? Basically the idea is that non nobles don't really use family names on a regular basis.
I was going to establish CT's family in a fic set in Fillydelphia but I just couldn't find a decent plot hook beyond 'Carrot Top goes to visit her family and take the train with Ditzy' so it hasn't gotten anywhere.
I'm considering a Yu-gi-oh! parody where CT used to be a champion TCG player at some sci-fi themed game (with a silly nickname, maybe 'Top Deck', because it's funny).
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No, that was actually on purpose, to represent the whole thing coming out in one squeak.
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No. I was talking about this type of formating problem. Before the run-on squeak. I know the squeak was intentional, it's a common writing technique for a person/pony/sapient saying something all at once. I was instead talking about the part just prior to that were the words were massively spaced.
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That's a pretty common glitch, actually. Fimfic is set up to try and make every line equal in length, and really long strings can make that feature act up.
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It's a rather annoying feature XD. I thought Fimfic fixed that feature last year?
It sounds like the playwright decided that there were too many characters in the play already and just decided to squash Bon Bon's character into Trixie.
Xanadu the Musical had a 4th wall breaking moment where they acknowledged that a certain character wouldn't be appearing during a scene due to double casting.
That was very good, although I do have one issue with the ending. Luna really needed to tell the girls that she was going to tell the world that Double Dash folded Bon Bon's role into Trixie in order to streamline the play (not a bad idea from a writing perspective tbh) in order to squash the annoying rumors this is going to create. It naturally isn't a perfect solution and they'll still have to deal with jokes about it, but there won't be any serious problems since everyone with a brain will see that the explanation makes perfect sense and trust it, especially considering the source. I usually don't advocate significant editing of published stories, but in this case it would only require adding a sentence or two and it closes a glaring issue seamlessly so I think it is probably worth doing.
This is an interesting story so far. I have a feeling that Double Dash may be a reference to something. [ cough ] RainBowDoubleDash [ / cough ]
When stories have letters, it is traditional to make them stand out from the rest of the text. The simplest way to do that is to use horizontal rules and blockquotes:
Mocking Jay. I see what you did there.
The Prench is not that scandalous:
"Behold, my love! A palace of ice! But it is not as beautiful as your emerald flanks."
"And now, this firework will burn as brightly as our incandescent love,"
¡Oh no! ¡Miss Sonata Dusk wants to eat their tacos!
Thinking about it, there are VERY few with access to the info needed to write it. Of those few .... Luna wrote it!?
Some ways, just doesn't make sense. Other ways, she's the only one who could
Really awesome... except for the window breaking. High-pitched voice? Really?
Oh, that was too damned funny. :D
Snails? Give into the darkness this time. :p
Another great chapter. Wanted to hug Luna and Dinky.
Ah, the Sirens. :D NICE!
Very good. I am curious as to who wrote it. Will that ever be addressed/revealed?
An entertaining read, though the ending leaves things unsatisfactorily unresolved. There are sequel hooks, and then there's shrugging and saying "I guess we'll jist have to live with it." There are too many questions about Double Dash's motives and sources for that ending to work.
I suppose what I'm saying is that I want more, but the way you made me want more could've been better.