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Blueshift

Joined December 2011
1,698 followers

Stories (35)

Blog Posts (115)

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Ever since Bon-Bon left for a new life in Manehatten, Lyra's life has lost its focus. She gets up, she goes to work, she eats, she goes to sleep. One day she knows she's going build up the courage to tell Bon-Bon how she really feels about her and they can live happily ever after.

That day will never come. Something terrible is happening in Equestria. Something that could be the end of the world. The Smooze has arrived and no-one can stop it, not even Twilight Sparkle. What hope then does Lyra have?

First Published
16th Jun 2012
Last Modified
16th Jun 2012

Comments ( 124 )

#1 · 95w, 6d ago · 5 · ·

You won.

#2 · 95w, 5d ago · 1 · ·

Horror stories are great, and the creatures created are awesome. And yet, with a name like "Smooze" I have a hard time fearing it.

#3 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·
#4 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

and once again, you break my mind with how glorious an author you are.

10/5, this is so good it breaks the scale.

#5 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

Woah. The Equine Instrumentality!

#6 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

... this description scares me

#7 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

This was absolutely amazing. The message was spot on, and the delivery was simply immaculate. This story is just so spectacular, I feel bad knowing that all I can give you for this masterpiece is a favorite.

#8 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

>>758063

AH, I remember hearing about that one. Good on you that you used it!

#9 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

This reminds me of "The Blob," but with a different appraoch and new ideas.

XiF
#10 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

I have no idea what I just read, yet it's beautiful. WHY

#11 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

>>758073

Oddly enough I was having a discussion about Eva the other day, maybe it subconsciously inspired me!

#12 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

After reading the part where Twilight is absorbed by the Smooze, I was thinking: "Well, there goes Equestria. All hope is lost." The ending was great. Welcome to my favorites.

#13 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

We could always use more stories with the Smooze. This one's a bit different from the last one I read; it's much closer to its original incarnation but also darker and more horrifying as well. Good show, sir.

#14 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

Hooray, new story! :D

#15 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

Wow.  I have nothing to say.  I love the metaphor.  I love it.  I can't help wondering what will happen to Smudge and Lyra, but I almost feel like knowing would ruin it.

#16 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

whoa. Blueshift, you've impressed FireFlash again! This makes you the only person to have impressed me 3 or more times, other than Brawney Hooves, TAW, and kits. Congratulations.

#17 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

>>758063

Oh gawd why did I watch that?:facehoof:

#18 · 95w, 5d ago · · ·

You have impressed me. Seriously. I would love to see this as canon, and at the very least it's headcanon now. Marvelous, and callbacks to G1? MLP:FiM is practically the saviour of the entire series, but that doesn't mean there were some good elements in the old series... better villains for one.

#19 · 95w, 4d ago · · ·

This. This story deserves a comment and a thumbs up.

I was never a fan of Lyra stories, but this one I'll make an exception for and throw into my favorites. A great job and a great story.

#20 · 95w, 4d ago · 1 · ·

I don't have words for this. An instant classic.

#21 · 95w, 4d ago · · ·

... Brilliant. Just brilliant.

#22 · 95w, 4d ago · · ·

This was really really good. A couple of places where I think you broke a nice subtle line too far open, but some great stuff in there. Buuut I just told you that already, so yeah. Awesome. Deserves more attention.

#23 · 95w, 4d ago · · ·

Glorious. One error: "being back a better world." I think that's supposed to be bring back, would it not?

#24 · 95w, 3d ago · · ·
#25 · 95w, 3d ago · · ·

Happy end, THANK GOD!

Great story, both touching and terrifying.

#26 · 95w, 3d ago · · ·

That was amazing.  :pinkiehappy:

It didn't swallow ponies up quite so quickly in the original cartoon, but perhaps that's just because it was missing an important ingredient.  Your interpretation of the nature/identity of the Smooze matches rather nicely with the way it affected the ponies in the cartoon, though.  ^_^

Great story as always.  ^_^

#27 · 95w, 3d ago · · ·

The Smooze creeped me the hell out as a kid. Great job recapturing that feeling of hopelessness. And fantastic job with the resolution. I love that even the Smooze -- the very personification of apathy and fear and a life unlived -- can be redeemed. Wonderfully uplifting.

#28 · 95w, 3d ago · · ·

>>766565

Yay thanks.  They just murdered it in the cartoon didn't they? It's been a while since I saw it. I was a bit annoyed actually, since the Smooze was just swimming along doing its thing and then it got rainbow cannoned :(

#29 · 95w, 3d ago · · ·

The Smooze v1 got rainbow cannoned. Then the witches got their shit together and added the FLUME to the recipe, which made it all badass and then only the Flutter Ponies (aka new toy line) could stop it.

DF
#30 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

This was an awesome read. I thought that I'd be some sort of philosophical piece after I read the description. After reading a bit I thought that it was horror and after finishing it's gone full circle back to philosophical. It has been an enjoyable and uplifting read.

Bravo and thank you.

#31 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

I am utterly amazed that, every time, you can bring in something that's nightmarish and bleak, and then undo it in a way that fits canon without feeling like a cheat.

#32 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

Ohh god, its just like End of Evangelion but less deep seated psychological issues and Tang and more ponies and friendship.

:pinkiegasp: The moment Komm Susser Tod starts up I am out of here.

#33 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

Looks like Fluttershy's cult ended up summoning the smooznami after all!!! :flutterrage:

#34 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

>>774338

I just googled that song/video, oh goodness!

#35 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

the world has been consumed by his (her?) ooze! that dead raccoon really did the trick :3

#36 · 95w, 2d ago · 3 · ·

I'm not a huge fan of Lyra being casted as her fanonically lazy, masculine, dim-witted, emotionally dense self.  But those are all extremely thin and nebulous complaints to have after reading what's undoubtedly the best MLP one-shot I've ever had the pleasure of tumbling through.

This was just...

This was just written well.  There's no other way around saying it.  This is good writing.  This is dayum good writing.  It flows well.  It's poetic.  It easily evokes images in one's head.  It's terrifyingly terrifying, without having to be melodramatic or grotesque.  It's a wonderfully visceral nod to pre-Gen4 jazz.  It shows every character as realistic--from personality to dialogue--including Applejack in her fifteen seconds of "C'mon, y'all!"

It's... just so good.

And it stars, Lyra, dammit.  Best one-shot in existence and it stars Lyra.  That's like finding a winning lotto ticket at the bottom of a jecuzzi full of gold-plated supermodels.

So, yeah, you.  Keep doing this, you.

-SS&E

#37 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

>>774546

Oh wow, high praise indeed! Thanks, that means a lot coming from you!

#38 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

WOW!!! You don't mess around. Not only did you tell an amazing story, you made Lyra the awesomest pony ever.

#39 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

I couldn't help myself, but I was laughing through this story until the resolve. Maybe I was just in the wrong mood for this.

It certainly wasn't because of the writing's quality - that was superb - but somehow the entire idea was just so grotesque to me.

To redeem and explain myself, I want to quote Hermann Hesse's "Steppenwolf":

"Humor is always gallows humor and if necessary you'll simply learn it at the gallows."

#40 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

Wait, a Blueshift story that isn't a crackfic? Even moreso, one that leaves me gripped with suspense but delivers a satisfyingly optimistic ending? By the Gods!:pinkiegasp:

So yeah, I liked it. That cover image was the first thing that grabbed my attention, and the reality of the Smooze is really freakin' terrifying, like the Blob except as big as the ocean (The Blob btw freaked me the f*** out). Centering on one character though did give it some added emotion to slap on with the terror, and what better complements terror than lament and regret?

All that said, I expected one depressing as all hell ending. Instead, you deliver something a tad unexpected but something I really like in stories! For spoilers sake I won't be specific, but I will say that I love it when characters of all shapes and sizes get a second chance/shot at redemption/re-imaging of themselves. It shows such promise!:yay:

An excellent short read overall. I say well done, my British gent (Yeah, there was all sorts of Brit written here, but it's you, so it's cool:raritywink:)

#41 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

>>774779

Thanks. Yeah, I love redemptive endings too, that's one of the things that hooked me on MLP actually, the redemption of Nightmare Moon at the end of the series opener. I hate stories that are depressing for the sake of being depressing, I think there always needs to be a reason for a story other than to upset the reader.

#42 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

>>766739

Technically, it was just stuffed into a quasi-dormant volcano. The Smooze was very much alive at the end of the movie.

#43 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

That was amazing :rainbowderp:

#44 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

>>774364

EoE tends to have that effect on people who haven't been exposed to the series first.

#45 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

#46 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

It was a really good turn around, because you made a really terrifying image like the cities and even the  casual becoming slime. My only complete about redemptive ending is the creators don't go far enough with horror so the reader will be so over joyed when the hero's makes it. :twilightsmile:

#47 · 95w, 2d ago · 1 · ·

And that's how Equestria was remade, with the new universe smell and everything.

#48 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

It was a really good turn around, because you made a really terrifying image like the cities and even the  casual becoming slime. My only complete about redemptive ending is the creators don't go far enough with horror so the reader will be so over joyed when the hero's makes it. :twilightsmile:

pardon my grammer

#49 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

Oh man, I cracked up when I read that "Bow bow bow bow bow bow bow" line :rainbowlaugh: I just imagined the G1 movie and BAHAAHAHAHHAHAAH!

But seriously, awesome story. Now I want to see how "Smudge" looks like :pinkiehappy:

#50 · 95w, 2d ago · · ·

First off, this story was absolutely outstanding. I was terrified, yet left feeling strangely happy and satisfied after reading. A story that's able to do this or produce any real emotion from me rarely graces my eyes, so bravo and thank you for writing this!

Just one thing, here: "It was a strange sensation, not painless at all," I'm not sure if you had meant that it actually was rather painful getting turned to smooze (in which case what you have is correct) or if you really meant that it was painless. I assumed the latter, but I've been wrong many times before.

Aside from that, this story is flawless in every sense of the word.

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