The Anthropologist

by Weavers of Dreams

-37- Talk and Cookies

"So, little Henry Mindell," Lyra began, clearing her throat as she looked over her notes, "you're ten years old, enjoy cartoons and classic comedians, and you are from a large family, of whom you are the middle child. You were about to take a bath before the portal yanked you across the dimensional divide, landing you in a mud puddle on the road just after sunrise. After attempting to run around for a while, unsuccessfully, because four legs are confusing, you were found by the local weather team, who took you to the nearest place where you could receive treatment. That being Sweet Apple Acres. I'll assume you put up a fight?"

The colt, face covered in cookie crumbs and sporting a milk mustache, nodded apologetically, nibbling slowly on his fifth cookie, which he had just pulled from his small cup of milk.

"It's okay, kid," she told him in a soothing tone, "no one's upset with you. It's a very understandable and expected reaction given the circumstances. Now, at Sweet Apple Acres, they promptly bathed you, asked you a lot of questions, and tried to get you to eat something."

"Waffles," Henry said softly. "I only ate one."

"I understand, you just weren't feeling up to feasting, were you? What, with this sudden change of scenery and all."

He nodded. "And, they really kind of fed me the waffle. I couldn't really..." he looked at his hooves with a mixture of horror and fascination.

"Yeah, the physics behind that tend to go over a lot of people's heads," Lyra said with a chuckle. "Don't worry, we'll help as best we can."

"C-couldn't I just go home?" he asked quickly.

Lyra got up from where she sat to lay down beside him. She nuzzled his head, feeling his little quakes and shivers at being so close to an alien creature he had no obligation to trust. "We're going to do our utmost best to do just that, Henry. But, it's going to take a while, as there is a list with many humans and so few mages that cast the spell. We just ask that you be patient with us, and we'll make sure to keep you safe and well cared for."

"B-but, what about m-my family?" he sniffed, finishing off his cookie.

"We can't do anything about them," she said gently. "You are our concern, for the time being."

"What gonna happen to me?" he asked turning his attention to the floor. Lyra used her magic to grab a book off her desk.

"Well... for starters," she opened it and began browsing a list of names, "I going to find you a place to stay. This book contains a list of ponies who have agreed to house humans and how recently. Now, here, have another cookie and finish your milk while I try and fiind you a place to stay."

"The ones who fed me were nice," the colt mentioned, before looking away ashamedly. "Even if I did..."

Lyra shushed him with a soft pat on the back. "You did nothing wrong. You're just scared. The Apples are more understanding than most ponies."

"I'm not scared," he said quickly, giving her a rather adorable look that was supposed to be brave, but looked more like a pout.

Lyra chuckled. "Of course you're not. You're a big, brave, strong man, aren't you?"

He lifted his chin to a proud angle and managed a smile. Lyra turned back to the book. "But, no, the human that was staying with them left just under two weeks ago, and we try to give everyone at least a month to before burdening them with another one. And, after the abnormal influx of humans lately, a lot of housing seems to be taken... oh dear."

Lyra began to frown, and the frown was getting deeper by the second. "There's only a couple houses open at the moment. The Rich household... but they specifically marked themselves down for adults only. Wouldn't want you near Spoiled Bit... ahem... Mrs. Rich anyway. That leaves Bon Bon and Noteworthy."

She stared at the book in thought for a while. "You know. I've lived with them for a few years, and only once was there ever a human there with us. Guess it's about time to house another one. That sound good?"

She just smiled when it was apparent he hadn't been listening. He was instead struggling to get his cookie out of the milk after it had soaked too long and broke apart. "Shake around a bit. You're cookie will disintegrate and add sugar to the milk. Trust me."

He gave a look, but did as she instructed. She couldn't help but laugh as he began to gulp down the rest of the refreshing dairy product. "What'd I tell you? I am nothing if not right. Am I right?"

"You're right," he responded, wiping his mouth and rolling his eyes good-naturedly.

"And never doubt it, kid," the mint mare said as she stood up grabbing her scarf. "Now, come along. Since today is so slow, I'll be taking you to the hospital myself."

He suddenly looked scared. "H-hospital? Is something wrong?"

"I hope not," she said as she wrapped the scarf around him. Again, he was fascinated by the golden aura. Keeping him entertained would be a synch. At least until the novelty wore off. "It's just standard procedure to make sure you're okay. Like those check-ups your mother took you to."

That clicked with him. "Now, don't be alarmed, I'm going to put you on my back now, okay?"

Without waiting for him to respond, she swept him up and set him upon her withers. "There you go. If you have trouble balancing, just bite my mane... the hair... not the flesh... please?"

He gave her a nod, to which she struck what she thought was an epic pose.

"Good, then let us be off on a grand adventure, Henry."

Little did she know.

Comments

[Applejack224]

Oooh

[CHAD2430]

Wouldn't want you near Spoiled Bit... ahem... Mrs. Rich anyway.

Oh my god that's better than Blueblood/Blueballs. PERFECT

[Viper Pit]

7623364 i prefer prince buttmunch